Every day just blends into the next...

[SassyMummy]

I've been a SAHM for 11-months now...though it seems longer because I was at home for the majority of my pregnancy too...and, well, life has just gotten very boring.

Don't get me wrong, I love that I am able to stay at home with my daughter and enjoy each day that I have with her (some moreso than others...:rolleyes: ...lol), but it seems that every day is just blending into the next...

My life is a routine. I get up, feed DD a bottle, breakfast, lunch, dinner...blah blah blah. Dr Phil's on at 12, Oprah's on at 1..DD naps at 2pm...I get online...blah blah blah...

There seems to be nothing exciting about my life any more. I don't have "fun" any more.

I basically have ONE friend...and she doesn't have children so she doesn't understand a lot of what I go on about. I do HAVE other friends, but I rarely see them, and I don't feel close to them (so therefore I don't count them as friends...they wouldn't be the people I'd call if I were feeling sad or whatever).

DP works most the time...and when he's not working, he's usually happy to just bludge around the house and not do anything (because he's sick of working 12 hour shifts all week...). It's understandable...but it's still boring and monotonous.

I just don't know what to do! I keep thinking about going to work...even though I don't really want to leave DD! I think the reason I keep toying with the idea of working is because it would really be a change of scenary...it would be something DIFFERENT...

What can I do to spice up my life?!

(Btw - I've also let myself go, which could contribute to my "so-so" moods. I only discovered this TODAY though...today I had 3 people ask if I bought anything for myself when I went shopping...and I hadn't. I have had 2 haircuts in 11 months and have bought myself 1 jumper in all that time...I just don't do anything for ME anymore...!)

HELP!

[Crazyfamily]

Hi There,
I know how you feel. I have six children so I have a lot to do but it is all the same stuff. I don't live far from you so you are welcome to contact me and we can get together if you like to.
By the way i tried to send you a pm but your box is full.
Take care,
Caroline

[leenaomi]

SassyMummy,

I actually schedule my day around Dr Phi and Oprah so I certainly don't see anything wrong with that!!

I also know how you feel. I went back to work when DD was 9 months old but then gave up again 6 months later to begin studying (part time, by correspondence) so I'm back at home with her again. Sometimes I get so sick of the sight of my house and bored with everything in it. DH and I only have one car so most of the time he takes it to work meaning I have no transport.

What I did to combat my boredom was to join a playgroup through which I have found some really good friends who have kids the same age as mine - ones I now see a couple of times a week. I also found a second playgroup through friends so I go to that as well. Then on the other days I try and meet with my playgroup friends either at someone's house, a park, a shopping centre or indoor play centre. I even met a few friends in my area on bubhub.

As far as letting yourself go, it is SO easy and SO tempting to stay in your PJ's all day if you have no reason to get out of them - I know, I do it! I feel much better if I get up first thing and shower and get dressed like I would if I were going out. For some reason this makes me feel much more "put together".

Is it practical for you to work a couple of days a week? Sometimes you need to do it for your own sanity. Otherwise is there something you're interested in that you could study from home or maybe some classes you could take in your area?

For me, the key was forcing myself to get out and do something even though it was easier to sit on my bum.

I hope I've been some help. Good luck!

[Funkychicken]

I remember that feeling! Honestly, it won't be like this for long. As you know so far, babies change very quickly and before you know it you'll be at another stage and your routine will change without your consent anyway! In the blink of an eye your little one will be at pre-school and you'll look back and say "What happened to my baby?"
On the other hand, have you tried joining a playgroup? A once a week get-together with other mums and bubs can make a big impact on your life.:)

[kymmy]

You are describing me after I had my first child, so I understand what you are saying.
I think as your baby gets older it will get easier but you need to remember yourself.
Try finding a new hobby to get into or something- anybody who knows me knows I hate routine and I tend to have a new hobby that I get crazy about for a while. I never get bored:no:
Maybe try doing something different every day- it doesn't have to be major.
Og gosh, you brang back all those memories of having my first baby.
Ppl used to tell me to get out of the house and I didn't want to
Then I had my son and I got a new hobby-shopping!
Now its the net- I wonder how long thies will last...

Anyway, just know you are not alone- I think we all go through it.
What did you do b4 your bub came along?
Try to remember you

[LittleBoysRock]

I know exactly how you feel!!

All my days seem almost exactly alike. I do try and vary things a bit but with DS's routine it is so much easier just to stick to it.

As for time for me... same here, I have had 3 haircuts and never really buy anything for myself. I am so much more focused on DS. Mum and my sister had to remind me and they try to encourage me to dress up and go out.

I dont really have any useful advice but just wanted to offer sympathetic :hugs:

I love bubhub becuase we all get to look after each other! :p

[Harmony83]

I too know how you feel! I was actually thinking this the other day! I have decided that I need to make our days more 'fun', going to the park, play cafe, or catch a train into the city, I just need to get out of the house!!!

[SassyMummy]

Thanks for all of the replies!:D

I figured that a lot of you might have been in a similar place in your life...which is why I decided to make a thread about it.

I don't drive (I know...it sucks...I'm going for my Learners on June 24...so hopefully, by the end of the year, I will be able to drive place!) which makes things SO difficult. I just never really cared about driving...and then when I needed to learn, I was pregnant and poor and just didn't have the time, energy or money! After having DD, I kept putting it off...but now i know that i REALLY need to learn how to drive! At least then DD could enjoy some sort of activity which will waste a few hours in my week! lol.

I TRY to think of hobbies for myself...but I'm really not sure what I could do. I'd LOVE to make little things...like clothes for DD and such...but I don't know how to sew! I think of all of these cool things I could make...but I just have no idea how to do it. Can you get sewing lessons anywhere?

[Jem]

I so know how your feeling...

same sh!t different day!! :yes:

I enjoy going to the op shop and spending all my milk and bread money for the week :eek:

[kymmy]

That is a great day trip- go to the Op Shop!
I love op shopping....as long as there isn't someone telling my kids off:confused: :rolleyes:

[IAdoreYou]

Honestly .. for the 1st time since having Brooke. today I started to feel what you are describing.. hubbie is asleep ( shiftworker ) and I'm not that much fun in the rain .. I HATE staying indoors ( i think thats why ) I LOVE outside, so does Brooke. I even got Brooke up early and we hit the shop as I had to pay my credit card today, she was such a good girl and we had fun, but once we got home and hubbie went to sleep and the rain kicked in, I started to feel the blended day feeling again.. I love being a SAHM though its definately hardwork somedays.

I agree, can you join a local playgroup? we try keep busy all the time. We so need the rain here .. so can't wait for the sun to cmoe back.

SUPER huge hugs :hugs:
I'm getting my hair-cut soon and reallyyyyyyyyy looking forward to it! Just the break and the head massage - OH blisss.

[mum2bubba]

I know how you feel I think alot of sahm mums (and dads) get bored sometimes.

Have you thought about joining a sports club or something (bowling, net ball etc) or a play group? Have some 'me time' once a week or whatever, go out shopping (without kids) or have a girls night out woth friends. Also have some 'couple night' with your partner maybe once a month or something and make it so its just the 2 of you.

Also you could maybe get a part time job one day (or night) a week not neccesarily (sp?) for money but for social reasons, or you could study part time at TAFE doing a few short courses.

[Mum2Bug]

I know how you are feeling so i made a promise to myself to get involved in activities and get bub and myself out of the house. the other thing i do is make the weekend feel like a weekend by going out and doing stuff that i would be doing if i was working during the week...eg trips to the park or the zoo, playing at the park, visiting friends, Sleeping in (well i try to anyway!)

once i got myself into that frame of mind i found i had so much going on in my life. I joined a playgroup on mondays and monday night is my night at wheelchair basketball catching up with friends. during the week i do shopping, op shopping or basically anything that will get me out of the house for a couple of hours, thursday mornings are story time at the library, and weekends are taken up with the above stuff and going and watching bball etc. i catch up with friends on their lunch breaks as well and also on weekends are my gatherings with Parents Without Partners.

Now im just exhausted but im starting to feel like an individual again, and not just a mum (not bagging being a mum tho, just like to feel like me again)

Maybe you could do some similar things to get you out and about! But schedule some time for yourself on your own if you can too. admittedly thats one i cant do.

[lukaelmo]

Can you get sewing lessons anywhere?

You most certainly can miss sassy :yes: . I just googled "sewing lessons" and you can even learn online...

Do you have a maching? If not, I do not recommend you buy a cheap one... I did and it worked for about 2 hems :rolleyes: . If you don't have loads of moolah then try to buy a good brand second hand.

[sugar n spice]

This is the same for me, same thing day in day out so boring. Your not alone

[SassyMummy]

Thanks lukaelmo! Will have to look into it...!:thumbsup:

I tried going to 2 playgroups...one about an hour away (or 2 hours by train...:rolleyes: ) for young parents (it was the closest one i could find!) and another one down the road, which was part of Playgroups Australia. I was the youngest one there (by about 7 years!) and DD was the youngest baby there too! I didn't go back...I just didn't feel very welcome...

Maybe I should start up my OWN playgroup for young ipswich mothers...? (Maybe THAT could be my hobby...lol)

[missolive]

Ive always been the type of person who can get quite glum in my own company for too long, so ive made a big effort, as a SAHM to keep myself busy. As I live in a flat I also feel the need to get out every day.

Ive got a really good mothers group and we tend to catch up a couple of times a week which helps. I also go for walks, go to the park and sit with my daughter enjoying the surroundings. Visiting the shops is also a regular event (always have something I can buy :) ) I find often going to a new place I haven't been before breaks the monotony.

As has been said already, joining a group/doing a hobby is a great way to break the boredom. Im planning on doing a water initiation class for Dd soon.

[Funkychicken]

If you are near a Spotlight store, you could have some lessons there. They run heaps of different classes including just the basic stuff. Good luck, getting crafty becomes an addiction!!:D

[chameleon]

Hey

Lol, I love how you mentioned Dr Phil and Oprah because I just have to watch them every day now:)
Some days I just get really lonely. It seems like all my friends have just forgotten me. We keep in contact but not very often. I always take DD for a walk in the afternoon, and try to take her visiting a couple of times a week (in-laws, my family) because she's always an angel when she's out and a terror for me at home!

I don't live too far from you, so if you're ever desperate we could always meet up one day. (I've emailed you before btw so I'm presuming you know where I'm from...?)