HELP! 3 mth old wakes every half hour for dummy, is CC the only answer?

[Darrietta]

I am desperate for some help! My 3 mth old wakes up every half hour for his dummy, day and night. With my first one the dummy was my saviour, but it seems to be making life harder this time around. I am so scared to do CC, as when my 3mth old cries my 2yo gets really anxious and runs around shrieking as loud as he can and that makes it all so much more stressful for everyone! In saying that, my 2yo responded really quickly to Hands On Settling and never had an issue with his dummy falling out.

I NEED some sleep, as i'm becoming more and more miserable every day and I'm kicking myself for getting into the habit of putting him to bed with his dummy in. He is breastfed, and I put him to bed awake so that he can self settle, which works fine until he wakes up looking for his dummy.

HELP?!:crying:

[Myztiks#1Fan]

is it possible the dummy is too big for his mouth? when my DS was that little we were using the happy baby dummies but now use the tommee tippee ones. hope things start to improve for you. cant write much as i am in a rush now to leave for work. i am sure there are a few other ladies who will be able to help you out with some wonderful advice

[Darrietta]

Thanks, we are using the Happy Baby dummies, but I'll give another brand a try. I'll try anything!!

[chicken]

I'm probably going to get a lot of negative feedback for this, but I'd let him cry for a bit.

Same thing was happening with us - the dummy was falling out and my DD (who is 10 weeks old now) would start crying again. We were having terrible trouble trying to get her down in the evenings - it was taking 3-4 hours of crying some nights.

In the end, I'd had enough and decided I needed to do something drastic or it would be too late to change her patterns.

So about a week ago, I put her down straight after her last bottle at around 7.30pm. She started crying after about 5 mins after her dummy had fallen out (usual pattern). But this time, we just let her cry for about 5 mins (doesn't sound like much, but it can feel like forever when they are screaming). Then I'd go in and replace the dummy. Then I let her cry for 6 mins, then 7 mins, which is how far we got to before she went off on her own. It was like she knew that if she didn't hang on to that dummy, she'd get no where. And that was it - she then slept for about 9 hours straight.

This was a week ago. The following night it only took 1 five minute period to get her to sleep. Then for the past four or five nights, we haven't had any crying at all - she's just gone straight to sleep and last night slept from 7.30pm to 6.15am straight through.

You should only do what you feel comfortable with of course. But I always knew there was nothing really wrong with my DD when she was crying (even though it sounded like there was and my DH found it hard to deal with). She just needed a bit of help to teach her how to go off to sleep on her own, and now each evening is totally stress free.

PS I'm using happy baby dummies too.

[Mum2Bella]

I'm probably going to get a lot of negative feedback for this, but I'd let him cry for a bit.

Same thing was happening with us - the dummy was falling out and my DD (who is 10 weeks old now) would start crying again. We were having terrible trouble trying to get her down in the evenings - it was taking 3-4 hours of crying some nights.

In the end, I'd had enough and decided I needed to do something drastic or it would be too late to change her patterns.

So about a week ago, I put her down straight after her last bottle at around 7.30pm. She started crying after about 5 mins after her dummy had fallen out (usual pattern). But this time, we just let her cry for about 5 mins (doesn't sound like much, but it can feel like forever when they are screaming). Then I'd go in and replace the dummy. Then I let her cry for 6 mins, then 7 mins, which is how far we got to before she went off on her own. It was like she knew that if she didn't hang on to that dummy, she'd get no where. And that was it - she then slept for about 9 hours straight.

This was a week ago. The following night it only took 1 five minute period to get her to sleep. Then for the past four or five nights, we haven't had any crying at all - she's just gone straight to sleep and last night slept from 7.30pm to 6.15am straight through.

You should only do what you feel comfortable with of course. But I always knew there was nothing really wrong with my DD when she was crying (even though it sounded like there was and my DH found it hard to deal with). She just needed a bit of help to teach her how to go off to sleep on her own, and now each evening is totally stress free.

PS I'm using happy baby dummies too.

i have never used a dummy for any of my children but if i did im sure i would use the same method you did

[gizmoduckus]

We were in exactly the same position as you only a week ago. We were trying anything and everything to get him to sleep longer than half an hour at a time. We finally decided to fork out $50 for the Sounds of Silence cd and it has been amazing. This week he has slept at least 2 hours every nap and most of the time without a dummy at all. At night he now only wakes for one feed in 12 hours.

It has been our saviour! :smiliedance:

[Darrietta]

I'm probably going to get a lot of negative feedback for this, but I'd let him cry for a bit.

Same thing was happening with us - the dummy was falling out and my DD (who is 10 weeks old now) would start crying again. We were having terrible trouble trying to get her down in the evenings - it was taking 3-4 hours of crying some nights.

In the end, I'd had enough and decided I needed to do something drastic or it would be too late to change her patterns.

So about a week ago, I put her down straight after her last bottle at around 7.30pm. She started crying after about 5 mins after her dummy had fallen out (usual pattern). But this time, we just let her cry for about 5 mins (doesn't sound like much, but it can feel like forever when they are screaming). Then I'd go in and replace the dummy. Then I let her cry for 6 mins, then 7 mins, which is how far we got to before she went off on her own. It was like she knew that if she didn't hang on to that dummy, she'd get no where. And that was it - she then slept for about 9 hours straight.

This was a week ago. The following night it only took 1 five minute period to get her to sleep. Then for the past four or five nights, we haven't had any crying at all - she's just gone straight to sleep and last night slept from 7.30pm to 6.15am straight through.

You should only do what you feel comfortable with of course. But I always knew there was nothing really wrong with my DD when she was crying (even though it sounded like there was and my DH found it hard to deal with). She just needed a bit of help to teach her how to go off to sleep on her own, and now each evening is totally stress free.

PS I'm using happy baby dummies too.

Thank you for that, I'll give it a try. I am so scared to let go of the dummy altogether, but that's a good compromise. Did you have any issues with re-settling?

[chicken]

No, we haven't had any problems re-settling. There was one night when she woke up about 45 mins after going down, and I just let her cry for a bit again. It only took about a minute and she managed to go back to sleep on her own - I didn't even go into her room. Most nights the dummy falls out after about 30 mins, and she doesn't need it again.

We had yet another brilliant night last night. For the last two nights she's even gone to sleep without her dummy. Its like she just knows what's happening now and we don't hear a sound out of her after we close the door - and then she wakes up 9-10 hours later.

Seriously, I'm so glad I did what I did. I was starting to go nuts, and now we have a dream baby. And it really only took 1 or 2 nights of crying.

[Fuchsia!]

They do NOT recomment using CC on a baby under 6mths. SO no i would not be using that technique.

I would try a different type of dummies or trying to get bub to sleep without the dummy all together

[wocket]

I agree. CC if for bubs 6 months +
At three months they're not far away from finding their hands...which means they will learn to suck their thumb/fist if you stop using the dummy. You'll never have to use it again once they do this, so long as they're not used to it. 3 months old is a tough time. they're just starting to realise theres a world out there to explore but don't know how to do it.

Try placing some jinggly rattles in your bubs hands a few times a day and put them in a baby play gym. make happy praising sounds every time they even look like they've moved their hand towards something (even a tiny movement). it'll help raise their awareness.

soon enough you'll find they can comfort suck their thumb. bliss.

[Darrietta]

Okay. I've started today, we're getting rid of the dummy. I tried about 4 different types of dummies and he wouldn't take any of them bar the Happy Baby brand.

So far it's taken me over an hour to settle DS. I decided to monitor the grizzling/crying, and instead of rushing in as soon as he made a grunting sound to replace the dummy I cuddled and sang to him when it sounded like he was getting distressed. Once he was calm I put him back down. I am exhausted, but he has finally gone to sleep and has slept for 40 minutes (he's made it past the 30minutes that he usually does!!)

I am finding this whole process terrifying, but I think if I am ever going to find my sanity the dummy has got to go! I think the main problem for DS is that he's waking for his dummy and I have to work out how to settle him without it. It's such a scary thing!! I hope I am doing the right thing. I keep trying to think of ways that i can keep using the dummy because he seems to really love it when he's got it, it's just that he loses it all the time. But plenty of babies learn to sleep without a dummy, right?

[Darrietta]

Just thought I'd post an update! DS woke after 45 mins (small success - it wasnt' 30 mins - but better than nothing!) and has just resettled without the dummy. Same process again, patting, singing, quick cuddle and a bit of crying, sadly. All up it took 5 mins for him to go back to sleep. I'm hoping that this will get easier over the next week, I feel like my heart is breaking.

[Darrietta]

I've given in :(. I haven't done so well, coping with the amount of crying, so we're back to using the dummy. For some reason he goes to bed quite happily without it at the last feed and through the night, but during the day he gets so upset and finds it really hard to settle despite my efforts to help him. I've decided that the dummy is the lesser of two evils and I'm going to attempt to just not use it at nighttime. Fingers crossed :fingerscrossed:!

[lupa]

My sleep doctor has a website.

www.silentnights.org

swear by him

Lu

[Darrietta]

Thank you for all the advice. I just thought I'd mention that although we've kept the dummy, I've found that since we've been putting our little guy to bed without rocking him until he's drowsy, and rather just giving him quick cuddles and say goodbye to various things, he's been going to sleep quite happily on his own and staying asleep past the half hour. I might be speaking too soon, but the past two days sleeps have generally been fuss free. I'm not sure what's changed but things are definitely a lot better now!
:smiliedance:

[anlin]

Hi my baby was doing the same thing but thankfully i found a sleepytot its a rabbit that has velcro on its paws and you put a dummy on it and my little girl can find it now all on her own and now i dont have to get up any more i love it, its the best thing i have ever given her.

:celebrate: