Bonding with/pining for your baby

[MsMummy]

Did it take anybody else a while?

I've always felt attached, but had no problem leaving him with other people (primarily my partner, and PT FDC from 3 months).

From 3 to 6 months old, I was leaving him 3 days a week to work.

He's now 7mo, and for the last month I just pine for him and don't want to leave him as much anymore.

I've rearranged my work so I'll only have to be away from him for 1 to 1.5 days. I'm leaving him in FDC one day a week as he seems to have formed a bond with the carer and I don't want to change care just in case I need to increase it in the future.

Is this what other people felt from birth? I remember the other mothers in the mothers' group saying they didn't want to be away from their babies but I really didn't understand.

But I understand now. It's a strong physical sensation. Like a pain in the chest.

Am I just a late bonder?:o

My partner cynically (and hopefully jokingly) suggests I may be a fair weather parent, in that he was "hard" as a newborn but is now lots of fun so I want to be around more.

[EmmasMummy]

I can understand that! I am still a stay at home Mum to DD of 10 months and now hate being away from her. Miss her when she is in bed at night.

It's kind of hard to explain how I felt when she was younger like i knew she was mine and wouldn't never let anything happen to her etc but I think as a new parent is odd now having a new little person in your life.

But yeah now its a much stronger bond.. think it may as have to do with they no show the same love and bond to you. They hug you and talk (babble) to you etc. Rather then just the eating sleeping crying pooping new born :)

[Shananaaah]

I definately know how you feel - DS was in fulltime D/C last year and I really missed him every day. I think I phoned the centre a couple of times a day for the first 4 months!!!!

Now I am SAHM and DS goes to d/c 2 days a week, and I STILL miss him (although I appreciate the time DD and I get by ourselves to bond also).

I think it's very natural and I'm hoping it gets easier - I have to go back to work at the end of the year and have BOTH of them in D/C!!!! :crying:

[ladybugblue84]

I think my love has truly grown for my DD as she has grown. I know I felt love & all that from the beginning but I too am starting to be so much more attached. It's really weird & hard to explain because I loved her heaps from the beginning but I am only just really grasping that I have a daughter, my child, who was in my belly & is now a real person!

I think this has happened to me for various reasons from an emergency c-section to relationship problems with her Dad & the in-laws over stepping their boundaries when we lived with them making me question my abilities as a mum. Now I am on my own & I feel like a real mum & I am so attached now. I used to let her stay at her Dad's overnight but now I just can't bring myself to want to do it anymore!

[babygizaiah]

I completely understand. i feel exactly the same way with Gizaiah. I just cant leave him. Hes 14mths old and I still cant bring myself to go to work. I just cant do it. People think Im crazy, but I waited so long for him I just cant be without him. I honestly feel lost when hes not around.

Once in a blue moon my sister will watch him for an hour if df and I are going on a date otherwise he comes everywhere we go.