Is Your Family Complete?? [Archive] - Bub Hub Pregnancy & Parenting Forum

Jelly Baby

26-03-2009, 08:16

Seacretsquirrel

26-03-2009, 08:27

:yes: Yep our family is complete. DH and I always said 2 kids (one for each of us or one for each hand when I am on my own). This was always going to be the case even if we had of had another girl. (This was what everyone was pressuring us about - going for 3 if #2 was another girl) But now we have one of each and our family is complete and we are both happy - and DH will be going for the snip when the Navy will allow him to get it done (I think they make them wait till bubs is at least 6 months)

Cordelia

26-03-2009, 10:06

I read that when a woman's baby is around 3 months old some pregnancy hormones (still!) give us an urge to breed again. I'm certainly feeling it!!

We are having a 3rd :) can;t wait!!

Purplebird

26-03-2009, 10:11

I've always wanted three children and am still intending to try for number 3 in the future. i'm almost certain i'll stop at 3, but who knows?! i don't believe you can ever be definite, that's why i'd be scared of dh having a vasectomy any time.

MummaFug

26-03-2009, 10:16

BellyFruit

26-03-2009, 10:18

oooooooooooooohhh no! Our family is NOT complete just yet :D!!! We're going back for a fourth baby this year :eek:!!! Like Cords, just cannot wait - all this TTC is soooo much fun :yelclap:!! Would not like to have twins a second time (though would get over it quickly if it were to happen!) and DH has already said, "well we have to buy a blimmin' van anyway with four kids, so what's stopping us having 5???!! (that would be ME btw LOL)

Our family's not quite done yet, the twins are 6 and Chace is brand new, so the age gap is quite significant and we dont want Chace growing up as an 'only child' so to speak as the twins' lives are so far ahead of his... we want another sibling close together to Chace so he has someone closer to his age to share his childhood with after the twins move out... we're just aware of this because I am a twin myself and we are 7 years older than our brother and this is exactly what happened to him. we'd moved out of home by the time he was 10, so from then on he was on his own at home with mum...

anywho, that's enough :ecomcity: from me! No, our family is not complete, though I hope we know when to put the brakes on! LOL, Jelly Baby, I don't know when you know you're done - all I know is I know we're not done... it's not selfish to want another baby that's for sure.... I reckon I will grieve for a little while when I know I've had my last bubby....aw.... sniff

TMD x :flowerz:

BellyFruit

26-03-2009, 10:22

i don't think our family is complete. I have been desperate for a 3rd since about 2 wks after DD was born.

Sadly, DH thinks we are done. He doesn't want to out number the adults in the family.

I am hanging onto the slight hope that he changes his mind.

Fugs, remind your DH that the more kids you have, the more you have to look after you when you're old... :laughing:... hang onto that hope, and when he laments one day, oh, wasnt it nice when Ashleigh was tiny etc etc, go in for the kill...the jugular Fugs, the jugular... (or perhaps that part of the anatomy that will allow babies to happen, either way... LOL)

k2ma

26-03-2009, 10:28

I don't know...At the moment I am happy with three. But no2 was a surprise bundle, if that happened again I would not be upset!
However, I don't think we will be planning another one...

Not sure - jury is still out. I guess that must mean no then (despite my signature!)

melbryan

26-03-2009, 10:28

After I have had 3 boys I thought and thought and talked to Dh and we decided we would try for a last one. I lookd into gender swaying and we followed it, knowing we could get another boy. I knew I wasn't finished and longed for another especially a little girl. After I got pregnant really quickly I said know more even if I had another boy and booked my tuebs to be done as soon as I had , had the baby.
I felt so finished and knew this was the last one and mentally prepared myself.
After 4 boys I knew I was finished but after 3 I was not finished. I don't think you get over that longing so follow your heart I did and can't be happier with all 4 kids.

2girls&1boy

26-03-2009, 10:48

After I had my 2nd baby I was in two minds about whether I was sure I was finished. My DH was adamant that 2 was enough. The week I decided that I would be happy with 2 children I found out I was pregnant with our 3rd. :D

He is now 7 months and we both know for sure this is it.:yes: I feel our family is now the perfect unit.

I think you know for sure when it doesn't bother you to get rid of all the baby stuff you no longer use. I have given away all maternity clothes, any 0000 & 000 baby clothes, car seats, bath seats, nappies, bouncies you name it. And I never had one moment of sadness..

daisy4300

26-03-2009, 10:56

You know what, I reckon you do just know. Apart from that but your body knows too. :laughing: I'm expecting number 5 and my body is def tired and worn and i am very happy with my babies plus having 2 of my nephews in my care, I know this is def enough for us. See how you feel in a few months time, they say you should leave it 12 mths between pregnancies for your body to fully recover, prob why my body is so worn out, :laughing:, my last 3 have been one after another. Relax and enjoy the spare time you have now cause with every little cherub it gets that little bit busier. You will know whether you want more or not and when your ready to stop.:flowerz:

Freya

26-03-2009, 11:03

I think so.

But you can never say never!

nats

26-03-2009, 11:11

Yes, 2 kids is enough here.
I will always greive the fact that i'll never be pg again but i really only wish i could be pg with #1 again and unless i get a time machine, that wont happen :(

abybaby

26-03-2009, 11:27

We are done for sure!! It took us 4 years to get the courage to have another so i am confident when i say no more!!

26-03-2009, 11:36

Maybe I'm just crazy, but I don't long for another child, feel we're completely done in that respect, but I do long for another labour. Not another pregnancy, just another labour:o. It'd be far to selfish to bring another child into the world based on that reason alone, so there won't be any more babies in this house.

tracynben

26-03-2009, 12:32

im definately done, i dont think i can go through all this again and another 20 hour labour with emergency section (both of my kids ended this way). Im very happy with 2, even though im finidin it very tough.
Im not a natural SAHM and findin it very difficult to put things on hold and have no routine to my life ( i do love them dearly and i hope that doesnt sound selfish).
Plus we couldnt afford another one.
So i def know i dont want anymore.

tracy xxxx

SammiJane

26-03-2009, 13:28

Yep we are done..I have 4 all up and they keep me way to busy but i love them all very much.
As soon as i had my daughter i knew i was done, even if she was a boy i would have been done.

We are very busy with the older ones and the sports they play, so i still want to have enough time for all of the kids. I would love just a little time for myself and hubby..:o:rolleyes:
I llove being pregnant and giving birth!!!:D

BubsNo1

26-03-2009, 13:47

Definitely not! We have only just had our first and we would like 2 (at least) :D

Jelly Baby

26-03-2009, 14:03

bootiful

26-03-2009, 20:02

I'm 95% sure we are done.

After having 2 emergency csections and 2 girls I would like to try for that natural birth boy. I always wanted 6 and told DH 4 would be alright, but with him only wanting 3 and having 2 csections already 4 would be pushing it.

I think we will stop at 2 perfect girls and that will leave us time and money to give them more.

eeyorethedonkey21

26-03-2009, 22:31

bootiful

27-03-2009, 08:20

im done. dh and i are quite happy with two boys. after having a c-section first time around and a vbac earlier this week, i feel like i have accomplished both births and i figure two daughter in laws is better then trying to raise a mini version of me :D

:laughing: that's one way of looking at it :laughing:

Congrats on your vbac, what an achievement :yelclap:

Nickimumto1

27-03-2009, 13:43

My logical brain say's we are done, i only wanted 2 and now have a boy and a girl. I got to achieve my VBAC, but not breastfeeding, i have 1 for each hand, only enough bedrooms for 2 etc.... But at the same time my heart says i want more. I think i am greving not being pregnant again, not feeling that antisipation and excietment again. It makes me sad just thinking about it. I have so many friends that are expecting there first, and i find it hard when i see them, i am so jelious.

I think i will need to find a hobby to keep my mind off having more children. I hope it is just hormones and that it will pass, i do'nt know how long i will be able to put it off.

eeyorethedonkey21

27-03-2009, 14:09

:laughing: that's one way of looking at it :laughing:

Congrats on your vbac, what an achievement :yelclap:

thanks. it was hard work and very tiring as it was so full on and happened so quickly

OneCheekyMonkey

28-03-2009, 06:12

Definitely not, we have only just started!

We know that we would like two, I would like three I think, DP keeps changing his mind.

:)

Ashi

30-03-2009, 10:13

Quote:
Originally Posted by 2girlssofar
I think you know for sure when it doesn't bother you to get rid of all the baby stuff you no longer use. I have given away all maternity clothes, any 0000 & 000 baby clothes, car seats, bath seats, nappies, bouncies you name it. And I never had one moment of sadness..

Interesting point.

I have a pregnant friend and sister in law and babies all around the place BUT I haven't been able to part with my maternity clothes or used baby clothes.

I have put them all in bags to put them down in the garage and what do ya know they're all still sitting here - I can't even take them out of my unit.

Perhaps that is answering my question....
__________________

i did this lol i got rid of ALL the baby/maternity stuff and said no more ty!
then i seperated from my partner spent a few years alone, met a new man and next thing u know along comes isabelle! lol

i never wanted more... i never wanted a diffrent dad for any of my kids..

sometimes i guess u never know what the future holds...

we are done tho 4 pregnancies was almost more than my body could handle n i got my tubes tied, im not sad that i cant have more, but its sure making me appreciate my last one every single day

CJandMum

30-03-2009, 10:29

Sometimes yes, sometimes no.... :laughing:
Not sure somedays. I'm happy with my two little girls but DH is asking me when we can try for the boy. I think we might give it a few years before we even start thinking about another addition. Even then, I bet we'll end up with 3 girls!

Jeca

01-04-2009, 08:04

We are so lucky to have 3 healthy, beautiful children - 2 boys and a girl. DH was reluctant to go for #3, but I wanted to try for one more and hoped to get a little girl. Like melbryan we gender swayed and it was a huge thrill when she was born and I discovered that we had successfully gender swayed and had a gorgeous little girl. I thought that would mean I'd feel done. I always said having a girl would make me feel done, but already I find myself thinking, I would love for DD to have a sister!! Poor DH I don't think he could face the gender swaying diet again! And besides he just feels done now and is keen to get in there for the snip. I just don't feel ready to say I'm done with having babies.

tales

05-04-2009, 21:28

Considering that we hadn't even planned for one, (and once upon a time, not too long ago, didn't want any) I can safely say that we aren't planning on any more. But if it should happen, it would probably not be unwelcome, either. ;)

LivingINhope

11-04-2009, 10:58

Hi Mummies,

I'm sitting at my computer this morning with my son at daycare and my daughter having her morning nap and I'm feeling a bit lost.

So I've got a quick question - do you feel like your family is complete??

Do you just know when enough is enough? I keep thinking that I want a third but am I being selfish?

Perhaps it's way too soon after the birth of my daughter to have a clear head about another one....who knows :confused:

I feel the same way you do, 2 is fantastic but it would be nice to have 3-4. I think if you are thinking of more children then you are not finished yet! Dh and I are already discussing when we will try for No3, lifes to short to wonder what if.

Why would it be selfishness that has you craving for No3 if you are willing, able and can fit in time for 3 kids then thats great. So many people these days are opting not to have kids or to only have 1 people like us keep the balance :D

kazarina

14-04-2009, 21:33

I read that when a woman's baby is around 3 months old some pregnancy hormones (still!) give us an urge to breed again. I'm certainly feeling it!!

We are having a 3rd :) can;t wait!!

that certainly explains it .....

and no i want more kids not sure how many....

my partner wants as many kids as he can he wanted 8 until i just blankly stared at him...

natski

23-05-2009, 12:24

I am really desperate to have another one, but sadly I don't think we will. Olivia is now 4 months and I felt the same way when James was the same age (someone said something about pregnancy hormones making you feel that way).

I would really, really love another one, and feel like I'm not 'finished', but we have one of each and are really lucky that we have healthy, happy kids. It might sound extremely selfish, but Olivia was in the children's hospital at 4 weeks of age and seeing so many other sick children, it made me feel like I wouldn't be able to cope if we had a sick child. Going through that was hard enough.

If it were up to me, yes, we would definitely have another. But DH feels we are lucky with our little blessings and that's enough. I just have to convince him. We tried for a girl with this last baby (which we got), but when we found out at our ultrasound, while we were both extremely thrilled, part of me felt a bit sad because if we had another boy, we probably most definitely would have tried for a third.

A friend of mine told me she was pregnant with no.3 (after a 6 year gap and them saying that their 2 was definitely it), and I was surprised to find myself quite jealous that she was pregnant! Isn't that bad?!?!

I haven't thrown out my maternity clothes and am in the process of sorting out all of DS's clothes to put on ebay, and it's actually making me a little sad. I have kept the really nice clothes and items that were gifts, but feel like I shouldn't part with them...just yet!

I really could have 6 if I could! Might need to start playing lotto!!!

sweetseven

23-05-2009, 17:30

Well my partner raced off and got the snip when I was four months pregnant. I think I still need to come to terms with the idea of no more.

and DH will be going for the snip when the Navy will allow him to get it done (I think they make them wait till bubs is at least 6 months)

I had already accepted that my family was complete after I got sick after #6 and believed that had made me incapable. But that turned out not to be the case, and now I find my self lamenting that it would be nice to still have the option in 3-5 years time. I think it all started when I stumbled across the name Jasper on Bubhub, and than just clicked as the right option for a boys name for the next one. (Note all my girls have their own boys name for if they were a boy. I dont have any need to have a boy, and would be completely surprized if I did ever have a boy.) Maybe it is just the hormones that someone mentioned. Besides names that I had picked out prior to pregnancy invariably got changed during.

tee

27-05-2009, 10:34

I think you know for sure when it doesn't bother you to get rid of all the baby stuff you no longer use. I have given away all maternity clothes, any 0000 & 000 baby clothes, car seats, bath seats, nappies, bouncies you name it. And I never had one moment of sadness..

I think you have a really good point there. I had a difficult birth with my first, then severe post natal depression, everything was rough and I said that I didn't want more but was never convinced I meant it; yet every item of baby clothing, toys etc were all carefully packed and I couldn't get rid of anything. Then I got pregnant with DD and after a brief cry of shock, I was ecstatic.

This time around, I can't wait to offload all the baby gear and I know in my gut that I am done. It has a lot more to do with a traumatic pregnancy and operations post-birth, and I do feel sad that we won't have 4 children (as we initially talked about), but I just know I'm done - I just feel I want to put everything I've got into the two that I have and it just feels right. I didn't have that feeling after DS.

edit: I must say too that the hormone thing at the 3-4 month mark MUST be true, as I am also experiencing it, yet I can guarantee that deep down I know that I'm done. Bizarre!

floodprincess

05-06-2009, 19:25

We're going for one more in about 4 years time!!

After DD1 was born, I swore I would NEVER have another baby.....then over the years, I softened to having another once we had a mortgage and were in decent, stable jobs...well, we'd had the latter for a couple of years when we discovered we were expecting DD2. A few months before she was born, along came the mortgage. Life was pretty much where I wanted it!

So, now 4 months down the track, we've had a few challenges with DD2 (after an 11 yr gap between kids, who wouldn't?) but I'm adamant that when she's almost school age ( like I said, about 4 years) I want one more.....then I'll be finished (I think).

But next time, we're having a boy!!

Ellie86

29-06-2009, 00:04

Hello :smiliedance:

In my world, my family feels beyond complete.
After bringing DD into the world I thought she'd be my one and only. Then we welcomed DS.

Though DB was so "no more babies" :detective:
But after DS's birth, I absolutely could not shake having another child, not so much baby. But it was truly ALL I could think about and talked about. :ecomcity:

And by the good grace of God DB finally came around and we were parents all-over-again third time round'. And now my heart feels so full, and happy. There's not something missing or niggling me to create more life. Lol.

At this point, I'm content.

But who knows......... :rolleyes:

:cloud9: