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[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi Everybody :wave:


I am new to these forums. I have read all the posts and replies on this forum and I must say that is is absolutely wonderful that there is somewhere/someone to chat to and how everybody helps one another with helpful advice and other issues. It is so lovely and gives me a warm fuzzy feeling!! :hugs:

It is comforting to know that there are other people out there who are travelling or have travelled the same rocky road of infertility and even those who haven’t, are able to offer encouragement and advice to help. So thank you to you all, some of you I feel like I know you already from reading the posts!

Have been on this rollercoaster now for a few years now :( up to my 7th IVF cycle. There are some days when I just can't see the light at the end of the tunnel :banghead:

I missed the SBS program on Tuesday night 31st May as my tele at home isn't able to tune into SBS. Did anybody see it and can tell me a bit about it?

[mauve]

Hi Melanie, forums can be a little confusing at first but I'm sure you'll find your way around in no time!
I watched the show and also did a phone interview a couple of weeks beforehand. I don't think I was fiesty enough for them though.
Overall it wasn't too bad, with the exception of one guest - if you get to see it I think you'll figure out who.
On the upside - at least this topic is out there. The more it's spoken about hopefully, the less 'taboo' it may seem to those who have had no exposure to it.
My main disappointment was that they didn't highlight one important thing. That is, that these babies go to homes of loving parents and are very much wanted.
If you go to the Insight website, you can read the transcript and I think watch it on line. You can also view the after show chat. That was good, a few radicals as you'd expect but also interesting.
Good luck with your journey!

[Jem]

:wave: welcome to bub hub

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi :wave: thanks everybody for your welcoming wishes.

Mauve, I found the program on SBS will be repeated. It was on Friday and will be again on Monday afternoon at 2pm, so I will definately watch it. I did, however, read the script on the net. Thank you for telling me about it.

[kymmy]

welcome to bubhub!:wave:
all the best :)

[Elfin]

Hi and welcome to bubhub. I am sure you will find a lot of support here:)

[samsara]

Hi and welcome
I've just completed my 7th unsuccessful IVF cycle. I know how you feel. I'm with Monash and they are starting a new protocol soon so my FS is hopeful that it will help us but we'll have to wait until midJuly to start again. Goodluck.
Lx

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi there :wave:

Mauve - I watched the SBS show today "Making Babies". It was very interesting and I taped it for my hubby to watch. I do agree with you that they did not highlight one very important thing and that is what you said, that these babies go to homes of loving parents and are very much wanted. I did figure out who the "guest" was that you were talking about......mmmmm .......say no more! :shame:

Samsara - I am booked for EPU this Friday 9/6/06, but things don't look so crash hot as my hormones don't look the best, probably means gammy eggs again, so I guess I can pad myself up for more disappointment......:( .....once again.....its pretty hard to stay positive and hope for the best when things have gone cactus so many times. This is my 7th cycle, but 1st with a different doctor & clinic.

Thanks to all for your welcoming wishes.

[samsara]

Sorry to hear the hormone levels aren't good. My eggs are poor too. What keeps us going is that you only need 1 good one to make it. Someone I know quite well was told she had 0% chance of falling pregnant and even with IVF there was only a 2% chance. She tried IVF and got no eggs then tried again and got 1 egg and it fertilised and she's delivered a beautiful little girl. I'm also realistic enough to know that maybe it won't happen but at the moment we are still going to try. Last cycle my hormone levels dropped off and there were no good eggs - took me 2 weeks of crying to get over it. But the time before we had 1 good one - though it didn't stick :crying:
:fingerscrossed: for both of us. Hopefully we'll both have BFP soon.
BTW have you heard about DHEA? Have you had your DHEA levels tested??
Lx

[Jem]

welcome to bub hub :)

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi Samsara :wave:

I heard of DHEA and am currently taking it. I have had my levels tested and am on a 100mg dose per day, but have only been on it for a few weeks. It probably has to be in your body for longer than that to make any difference. I guess we won't really know what the quality of the googies are until they get retrieved. I know what you are saying about that it only takes 1 good egg and 1 good sperm to make 1 good embryo and I keep hoping that I will pop out a good egg, but when there has been so much repeated disappoitment time after time, it is so hard to see the positive. I do hope that there are still some good eggs left in us, I mean SURELY, there must be 1, but where on earth is it??? :confused:

[samsara]

Yes, There must be at least one good one left in us. I know of 2 ladies who did IVF 19times to find their 1 good one. I hope that isn't us. One is a friend of my mum's. Many people fall pregnant after they have given up too. Seems to be that by wanting it soooo much your body fights against you, then when you forget about it, it surprises you. I'm just trying not to stress and not think toooo much about it but as you know easier said than done.
I didn't have my levels tested as my old FS didn't really beleive in the DHEA anyway but thought it couldn't hurt. I started out with 25mg and got a really good embryo next cycle but it didn't take. I upped dosage to 75mg but got no good ones so have gone back to 25mg and we'll see how next time goes. I'm with a new FS now and he knows of DHEA and has a few patients on it but is still waiting to see if it works or not.
Lx

[wa mum of 4]

Hi Melanie and samsara,
I have been reading your posts and feel deeply for you both.
I have been very fortunate in falling pregnant and cannot possibly imagine the disappointment you both are constantly going through.
You both show the strength and determination I wish I had.
My cousin had problems conceiving and went through IVF 5 times with no success.
She then asked if I would donate my eggs to her for fertilization I agreed.
She decided to have 3 months off and go on a holiday over Christmas 2000 before we both started egg retrieval.
She came back and went for test and low and behold 2 months pregnant, my cousin went on and conceived twins 2 years later naturally. I tell you this so you will know there is a light at the end of the tunnel you may just need to search for it in places you never thought it would be. :hugs:
Good luck with your journey and my heart is with you.
Sarah

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi Sarah

Thank you for your beautiful message and lovely words of encouragement. I really wish that I could have something so surprising and wonderful happen to me like it happened to your cousin, that would be just so awesome, but I feel like I am constantly drawing the short end of the stick all the time! Uuurrrhhh :mad: !! Its been too dark in my tunnel for so long, no light in it and no sight of any light !! I see you are a Mummy to 4 kiddies, :) how lovely and very lucky, they must keep you very busy. Thank you again for your lovely message. It is much appreciated. :)

Hi Samsara

I went for another scan today and am having EPU this Friday the 9th of June. Doc said that my hormones had slightly improved and were reasonable, but not getting my hopes up. Been disappointed tooooo many times! :( Have you noticed any side effects from the DHEA? I didn’t notice anything when I was on 25mg per day, maybe the odd sleepless night, but I can’t say for sure that it was the DHEA. And now, being on a much higher dose, who knows, it might be too early to notice anything. Did your FS prescribe it for you? Mine did, but they don’t seem to know too much about it or if it really works. I am doing my first cycle with a new doc and new clinic. The other doc didn’t have a clue about DHEA. Unbelieveable, that those ladies you know did 19 cycles of IVF to get their good egg. Did they get pregnant? I have to take my trigger injection in another 45 minutes. Doc has me taking 2 trigger injections – that had me worried at first….I hope that the googies will be just poached right, not fried, hard boiled, runny or maybe he wants the eggs to explode!!!! Are you currently on a cycle?

[samsara]

Sarah - Thanks so much for your lovely words of hope. I sure do hope & pray my miracle comes soon. 4 children - you are very lucky although I'm sure there are days when they exhaust you. Thanks so much for caring, its lovely to know others care.

Melanie - couldn't get onto bubhub last couple of nights, Computer kept saying page not displayed or some such rubbish. DHEA for me has no side effects. Originally I was on 25mg and had 1 good egg then it was uped to 75mg and had no good eggs so doctor has lowered it again to see what happens next time. I'm not doing a cycle at moment but start injecting and sniffing july sometime 20th?? FS doesn't know much about it and I think the jury us still out on whether it really does work. Clinical studies are in very early stages and nothing new has been released from US since late last year which is strange. Usually as soon as they know something it gets released. Both people I know who did IVF 19x did deliver healthy babies. Good luck with EPU.
Lx

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi Samsara

Sorry I haven't posted a message in a few days, been a bit flat chat. I, too, had the same problem a few nights with the web site "page cannot be displayed" - maybe the site was down.

Well EPU is over and done with, PHEW. In the end, only got 3 eggs, due to my poor response to the fertility drugs. 1 egg was :thumbsdown:, 2nd egg fertilised, but didn't form to be a normal embryo, so that one is :thumbsdown: too, 3rd egg fertilised :yelclap: so I will be having a transfer Monday morning 12th.

Apparently this embryo is a bit "grainy" which obviously means that my egg quality is not so flash, so I am really hoping that this embryo is surviving by the time we get there tomorrow morning. Have been put on a cake recipe of drugs to support this embryo, so hopefully it will be chromosomally normal and implant itself, so here is hoping!!! I can't actually believe to have made it this far as the last 3 cycles have failed to have any fertilised embryos to transfer. What hard work, just making the one little bugger!

Have you tried any alternative therapies? I tried the Sharkeys Herbs for about 6 months, but with no success and far TOO expensive. I am in two minds about whether I should try alternative therapies again, like acupuncture and chinese medicine. Have you heard of Shen Therapies? He was the guy on Brisbane Extra? I am not sure what to do here and whether we should just forget wasting money on alternative medicine and look seriously into finding an egg donor.

Bet you are counting down the days until you start another cycle again? How long until you start now - not sure if it is this month? What kind of protocol will it be for you this time? GOOD LUCK !! :thumbsup:

[samsara]

Hi Melanie
Yeh I tried Sharkey herbs for 2 years with no success. Shen therapies isn't cheao either. $300 first consultation and then you have to pay for herbs etc.
What cakeload of drugs are you on to help you lucky emby? I'm usually just on Crinone and vitamins??
Goodluck anyway. Hope the transfer went well. My next cycle I think will start around 20th July so EPU early August.
I'm trying to eat a bit more healthy as I've been rather slack and I need toexercise too - too much of the couch potato.
Do you think the DHEA is doing anything?
When will your BT be for this little emby??
Lx

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi Samsara :wave:

I looked up Shen Therapies on the internet on the weekend and concluded that it was expensive, but I am still a bit curious about them. I am open to alternative therapies, but the cost is a factor, especially when you already pay so much to do IVF (over and over!). I have a number of friends that tried the Sharkeys herbs (including me) and none of them got pregnant, so it does tend to make you a bit skeptical as to whether alternative therapies actually work or not, especially when there is no “official” proven research to say that they do work, its all based on testimonials. I guess everybodies body is different and I am sure that they work for some people.

Are you doing a pill down or long protocol that you can pin point the date that you can pin down the date to start your next cycle? The doctor still says to me that my best chance of getting pregnant is to find an egg donor so I am currently researching that option as well.

I don’t know if the DHEA has made a difference. I guess I did get one egg out of this cycle, but last 3 previous cycles have been bad eggs. Regarding the cake recipe of drugs for embryo support, I would be happy to tell you, however, so many to list – let me know if I can sent you a private message with the details? There are so many to list that I am almost embarrased to put it all down here!

[samsara]

Hi Melanie
Yes you can PM me with the list. I will be going on active pill to down reg next weekend with EPU on 4th August. My hubby and I have thought about finding an egg donor if nothing happens soon for us. My insides get knotted up thinking about it as it's such a big decision. My clinic has a 3 year wait so if we did do it we would have to advertise privately. Times like these I wish I had a sister as I have heard of many sisters who have donated eggs to sisters which is really nice as it keeps it all in the family. When do you find out if little emby has made it?
Lx

[Mum&bubs]

Welcome to bubhub & good luck :fingerscrossed:

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi Mum & Bub - thanks for your note and good wishes. It is much appreciated.

Samsara - I will send you a P.M. Message and give you the list of pills etc etc etc doc told me to take during my 2 week wait. So check your private messages next time you log on.

My BT date is Tues 27 June unless I see AF first but I already feel its doing to be another :no: :no: - just don't feel any different and based on previous experience, why would it be any different this time. Sorry, just feeling a bit :gloomy: - probably from all the pills and drugs I am taking, making my body go hay wire and emotional. I would give anything to have the worst morning sickness :barf: at the moment and be laid up on bed because it of, but it would be worth it if it was because of 2 lines on the paddle pop stick!!! Heres hoping!

[leisurly]

Hi melanie

I wish we could all give you a big hug, :hugs: get a good girly movie and have ice cream, as I'm sure a good laugh :laughing: would pick up your spirits, remember the little egg as my friend called her babe during pregnancy, needs some cheery messages and I'm convinced laughing sends of some great positive reactions in the old body.

My friend mentioned above went through 4 ivf cycles, and gave up due to age and then fell pregnant 6 weeks before her 40th, I on the other hand haven't even been able to go through a cycle. But it is good for us to hear lovely stories as it gives us all hope.

got my:fingerscrossed: and toes so that you have good news, don't wish the morning sickness on yourself, you've had enough to put up with andremember most women don't even realise their preganant so please don't give up before times out. You do have a little embryo even if it is a little grainy, hey none of us are prefect and remember we are all behind little grainy making it to the blue line. :yelclap:

Lesley

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi Lesley :wave:

Thanks for your lovely message of support and caring words. It brought tears to my eyes. Its nice to know that people care. Its just so hard to be positive. I just have this gut feeling that this embryo hasn't implanted and the cycle hasn't worked, yet again. You know when you have a gut feeling about things, well for me, they are usually right. I have been trying to keep busy, but it isn't really working.

It is lovely to hear nice stories of success, but I have resigned myself to the fact that stories of success usually happen to other people, not me. I guess I am feeling a bit sorry for myself :crying: and being a misery guts. :( Sorry!

I can't wait to get the next 10 days over and done with and quit this ridiculous drug regime that I have to take during the 2 w.w.

Thank you for your good wishes and keeping your fingers and toes crossed for me. I really appreciate your kind words.

[leisurly]

Hi melanie

How is the week going for you, I hope your relaxing, and although all previous tries haven't been successful remember you probably won't feel any different this time, even if little grainy is bedding in. Sorry to have caused tears was hoping to put a little smile on your face. :D

I've sent you a pm so that if you need to chat :ecomcity: :ecomcity: you can give me a call

L

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi L

I am hanging in and counting down the days until this is over! No doubt the emotions and feelings are highly affected by all the imbalance of hormones.

Thank you for your P.M. msg - I have sent you a text msg this morning. Hope you got it.

I am touched to know that people care. This is just so lovely and gives me a warm and fuzzy feelling :hugs: - will keep you all posted on how things pan out.

[samsara]

Hi Melanie
Just ready about your egg being grainy. My friend was told her egg was no good but they put it back anyway and told her she had better give up on the IVF and well....she got PG. I've read some books where others have gotten pg with poor quality embys so I guess there is more to it than what the scientists realise. If it fertilises then it has a chance is what I say. But if it is a BFN then heaps of hugs to you and don't feel guilty about :ecomcity: That's what we're here for.
Lx

[Melanie&Lucky]

Thanks Samsara. You are right, every embryo has a chance, no matter of its quality - but I know this will be nothing short of a miracle if it implants.

I don't have any signs of anything. I am not confident about having a BFP. Its too hard to be positive when just so much repeated disappointment in the past gives me negative vibes. :( It is almost like if I anticipate disappointment, then I won't be as crushed as I was in the past when cycles have failed.

I am counting down the days until this is all over!

Cheers

[samsara]

Hi Melanie
I think not getting ones hopes up isn't a bad strategy as I have heard of so many people who finally got pg when they had given up. Weird how things work. Maybe the stress of wanting it sooo badly stops your body allowing it to happen. Chin up. I'm sending you a BIG HUG.
Lx

[leisurly]

Hi melanie

I hope last week went by for you without too much fretting and all is well. I just heard from my sister in law that she only had one egg from the ivf cycle and the pregnancy is progressing well - 12 weeks, I hope your also:yelclap: still smiling.

I'm sure as the days are counted down to the blood test your mind will be fretting, keep positive. I know it is difficult, still got the fingers and toes crossed

L

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi Leisurly :wave:

Thanks for your message. Well I am glad the 2 ww is over with and I can now get on with "living a normal life".

Unfortunately it was a BFN for me, :( wasn't meant to be the one this time. Hopefully, my turn is still to come. Oh well, at least we got further with being able to have an embryo transferred which has been alot further than we have had in the past where we have experienced cancelled transfers due to failed fertilisation.

It wasn't like I didn't expect to get a BFN, I just had this gut feeling that it would happen.

Doc says to find an egg donor (which we will be doing soon) and we are also on the embryo donation waiting list at the clinic.

Thanks to you all for your messages of support and encouragement.

[babydreams]

Hi Melanie,

Just wanted to say how sorry I am to read about your BFN. I know you didn't hold out much hope...it's sad to feel that way, but after so many IVF attempts it's totally understandable.

If you do move onto looking for a donor, at least you are already surrounded by support and positive stories to encourage you. I'm sure you'd find a donor in no time.

Hugs :hugs:
Babydreams xx

[leisurly]

Hi Melanie

Sorry to hear your news, :gloomy: but as you have got further this time well maybe the tide has turned and next time will be a success.

Do give your self a little time to feel a bit sorry for yourself as I think we have to grieve a little :crying: before we can pick ourselves up, brush off the dust, take a deep breath and face the next challenge.:smiliedance: So have a little self indugence and good luck with your next step

big hug

Lx

[Melanie&Lucky]

Hi Babydreams & Leisurly

Thank you for your lovely messages. I really appreciate them. Nice to know that people care - give me a warm & fuzzy feeling! :hugs:


I'm not doing too bad, getting there, brushing off the dust, so to speak and moving forward, you have to, not to lose sight of your goals!

Thanks again.