DoCS NSW

[Aroha0509]

I'll apologise in advance because this could be quite long. My DP has 2 boys previously to other mum's. One's 12, the other one is 8. This concern's the 8 yr old. His mother has 5 kids to 4 different fathers, the 8 yr old, a 6 yr old boy, a 4 yr old girl, a 3 yr old girl and an 18 month old girl. The two youngest girls have the same father, he is currently incarcerated. The mother recently assaulted her brother with a broken glass bottle so the children have been taken into care. DoCS is now trying to find a home for the children. There are a whole other bunch of issues with the mother, but suffice to say the children should not be with such a woman. DoCS has also ruled out most of her family due to a history of domestic violence through the family among other issues. My DP and I would like to take care of his son, however we live in QLD and DoCS has stated that they would prefer to do everything possible to keep the kids together. They're in NSW at the moment. I can understand that, I think it's important as well. We have the 2 girls to think of as well, however were we in a position to do so, and had some help to find suitable accommodation etc, I would be more than willing to take all 5 kids regardless of who the father is, to give them a safe home.. Those kids deserve a safe, stable, happy home. DoCS has told my partner that because he lives in QLD he probably doesn't have much of a chance to get any of the kids at all, including his son. I was wondering if anyone had any advice for us.

TIA

[Loopy Linda]

i think it is disgusting that ecause you live in qld the little boy 'probably' won't be coming to live with his father. i think i would seek legal advice, that boy should be with his dad if his mother in not capable of caring for him. good luck

[mum of 3]

i would get leagal advise if your dp has contact with his son and they have some form of a relationship then he should be considered

[LilShenanigans]

I'd keep pushing it with docs, and pushing the fact that with help you will take on all the kids..

State shouldnt matter, especially when it is so hard to re-home any more then single children at once.

And yes, check your legal legs. If your sure about it all, you may have a bit of a tiresome fight, so make sure your both in agreement and know exactly what you may be putting yourselves up against.

[Aroha0509]

Thanks for all your help ladies. We've had some legal advice and are proceeding accordingly.. hopefully we'll have it all sorted with minimum of fuss..

[Angelmist♥]

I just want you to wish you the very best in all of this :hugs:

[beebs]

Surely the best place for him is with his dad?!!

[cassvanm]

This is absolutely of no use to you but just thought I'd let you know that Docs are ABSOLUTELY USELESS!!! I hope they see sense and put the kids with you. I work in a school and see case workers who are incompetent all the time. They come out for all the wrong reasons to the wrong families and never help when others need it. It is so frustrating!!!

Once again, good luck.


Sorry, but I take complete offense at this comment. Please keep in mind that there are some of us on this forum who are caseworkers for DoCS, and have done some great work. Please consider others, and try not to make generalisations such as this. It's all too easy to get on the DoCS Bashing Bandwagon!
I am not saying that plenty of mistakes aren't made, but that being said, I've seen kids go through school, all the way to yr10 etc, and are illiterate. However, I don't go around saying that everyone in the education system are incompetent.
Just my 2 cents.

[delirium]

Normally, DoCS will try and place children within their families before looking at foster care. It seems strange that they would not consider your DH being his father and willing to take him.

I would suggest you request a meeting with the team leader in charge of your case worker. They can do a video link up with the DoCS office in the state where your DH's son is. List all your reasons why you can provide the child with a safe and healthy environment. Show that you have thought ahead and have considered schooling, and logistics with how you will function with the child in your care.


Sorry, but I take complete offense at this comment. Please keep in mind that there are some of us on this forum who are caseworkers for DoCS, and have done some great work. Please consider others, and try not to make generalisations such as this. It's all too easy to get on the DoCS Bashing Bandwagon!
I am not saying that plenty of mistakes aren't made, but that being said, I've seen kids go through school, all the way to yr10 etc, and are illiterate. However, I don't go around saying that everyone in the education system are incompetent.
Just my 2 cents.

:iagree: DoCS workers have thankless, underpaid jobs where they are threatened, harassed and blamed for everything. They work long hours and go out on-call at 3am to remove children at risk... then roll into work at 9am.

The problem is the gross under funding and lack of support for the workers. Blame the system, not the individual.

[MummyDaddy]

Go talk to Legal Aid. It sounds like he has a good case to apply for custody. What a shame the children can't be together. But if your husband gets his son then at least that is something.

How sad for all involved.

[Jewely]

"The problem is the gross under funding and lack of support for the workers. Blame the system, not the individual."

See that's interesting, I would be inclined to blame an individual caseworker when things go horribly wrong, rather than the whole system.

[cassvanm]

"The problem is the gross under funding and lack of support for the workers. Blame the system, not the individual."

See that's interesting, I would be inclined to blame an individual caseworker when things go horribly wrong, rather than the whole system.


Really? What about their managers, the policy makers, the magistrates who make the final decisions on court orders, the media for providing pressure, the government who dictate the legislation (I could go on). Or, what about the parents who did not care for their children and placed their own babies/children in danger from either negligence or abuse?
Sorry, it's a total cop-out blaming ONE individual for a systemic issue.

[Jewely]

"Really? What about their managers, the policy makers, the magistrates who make the final decisions on court orders, the media for providing pressure, the government who dictate the legislation (I could go on). Or, what about the parents who did not care for their children and placed their own babies/children in danger from either negligence or abuse?
Sorry, it's a total cop-out blaming ONE individual for a systemic issue. "

Wow, I think you leapt quickly from systemic to global in a heartbeat. But yes it would be a copout to blame one person for systemic abuse if that was the reality.


My experience with DoCS is as a caregiver and I have seen policy interpreted any which way the individual caseworker feels like at the time, obviously with approval from a manager or often probably with apathy from a manager.


I have seen caseworkers try very hard for a child only to have their manager say no. Again it appears to be an individual.


I have yet to have a single child in my care where at the end I have thought yes policy was followed to the letter.


It is not within my imagination to assume that when deciding on a child's case that all of DoCS get together with the governement, child's family, magistrates and the media to decide what is best.

[hailsntwang]

Hun

I just want to wish you all the best in your fight.

If you are willing to take care of the son then I see no reason not to place him with his father.

Sometimes unfortunetly it's just not possible to place all children within the same home. If they wan't to keep all children together and you are willing, I don't see the problem im moving them interstate if it's going to be in a more caring and stable environment?

Don't give up and please keep us up to date.

[Aroha0509]

Thanks hails!

Just a quick update. We've now received Legal Aid and have a solicitor helping us out with the interim stuff. This means that we can now be an active part of forming the case plan with DoCS which is fantastic. Once the new case plan has been outlined we go to court to state our case in front of a judge.

It looks like at this stage we're only going for my DP's son. We're not going to get the support we need from various places to allow us to take all the children. We see it as the main thing is to get DP's son into a safe, stable, loving environment where he can thrive.

I'll keep you posted.

Thanks again,

[Aroha0509]

Quick update. DP is in Sydney today attending court in the hopes of obtaining custody. I will let you all know how we go, but we see it as a victory to have at least got this far and have ourselves heard!

Thanks again for all your help and support.

Cas

[Mum2Bella]

Quick update. DP is in Sydney today attending court in the hopes of obtaining custody. I will let you all know how we go, but we see it as a victory to have at least got this far and have ourselves heard!

Thanks again for all your help and support.

Cas

thats fantastic.My friends nephew was in DOCS in sydney n he know lives with his Aunty in QLD,so it can be done.

if your husband gets asked by the judge if he is willing to take the other children in his care,will you be willing to do that?

we were asked that question with our daughters younger brother(not DF son,but because the boys father had DV charges he couldnt get custody of his son)


i wish you all the b:hugs:est

[tallara]

Whilst DOCS do try to keep families together living in QLd isnt an issue-as a foster carer i know that many children move between states to live with family members or even foster carers.

they do try to place with family first- although in the interim there are often delays and the children stay in their local area with short term foster carers ( to enable the " best for the child" scenerio to be worked out).

as the biological father your husband would have a very good chance of applying for and gaining full custody of the child- although if you needed to go through DOCS i dont know, or if you could just go through the family court process and apply for full custody... at least for his own child- youwould need to go through DOCS for any of the childs half siblings.

[Aroha0509]

That's what we thought tallara but since the conference 2 weeks ago, they're still mucking us around and not giving us any info.. we have court on friday so fingers crossed it all goes well..

[Mum2Bella]

good luck:fingerscrossed:

[farmerswife]

I wanted to wish you luck.
I have a cousin who's children are in foster care and i know that if they had fathers able to give them a good home they would have our support even if it meant moving them interstate.

[tobys dad]

the hours that docs work is irrelavent.what about special care nurses and so on. keeping babys alive and healthy all hours of every night.what thanks do they get. you that docs are so great and just in thier cause.do you work for them? if not you are seriously mis informed.some cases granted are just in thier cause.my children were removed from my care with no intervention of help or previous check to the allegtions made by mandatory reports. ie, that im on drugs,that im an alchaholic .various other vicious remarks. after my kids were taken i was put on urinalysis wich confirmed that i use no drugs or drink. same test 40 plus times. they just adjusted thier story to justify thier actions.i was orderd to clinical analysis,no mental health issue.they just adjusted that to my attitude isnt right then.i think a massive reform of the way they take on reports to putting into action of taking children is well over due. i just hope for your childrens sake that you dont have to go through what im going through.before sticking up for them so much look outside your little box into the grey area wich the 75% of people live.

[OneNowOneLater]

How did the court hearing go Aroha???

[Aroha0509]

Hi guys, sorry it's been awhile.. court was good and bad.. bad in that it was mostly a waste of time because DoCS hadn't done what they were supposed to, but good in that they've met us, seen us with our girls and seen what kind of parents we are, and are now actually doing something! But thanks to the mucking around it's going to be even longer before anything happens. We have at least another two court dates, one we don't have to attend as it's just filing papers.. and then we'll see what happens from there.. thanks again for the support guys, it's much appreciated