Tell me about your 10mth old

[Bell & Bug]

Im just wanting to know about your 10mth old, or when your baby was 10mths old.
I mainly want to know about sleep time. How do you get bub to sleep? How long does it take? Is it a struggle?

I feel like every new week we start at square one again, and im ripping my hair out like there is no tomorrow. I cant deal with this any more, and nor can my relationship with DF :crying:
I am currently doing CC, its the only thing that remotely works, and we have a breakthrough, but a week later back to square one. We never get a break.
Thing is, I can handle it (most of the time), but DF cant, and we fight day in and day out because of it, so then I cant handle it.

I keep everything consistent, I never change anything, so I dont know why we keep getting back to square one.

I dont want to lose my relationship, and at the moment its not looking good. I also want my DF back, I cant handle the fighting, I cant handle seeing the person I love so much be so depressed and unhappy. Its killing me.

I just get so depressed when I see so many babies around DDs age that are sleeping in the pram or carrier or the car or just where ever. DD only sleeps in the cot and even achieving that is a exhausting struggle.
I just dont know whats normal for DDs age :(

Sorry this has turned into a lot more than just me wanting to know about your 10mth olds sleeps.

[Hollywood]

I was fairly lucky with DS, he has always (and still is) happy to sleep in the pram or car. At home, without the use of the pram, he has always been breastfed to sleep (still is).

Maybe your DD is dropping down to 1 nap a day soon? My DS was around 11 months when he phased out the extra naps and went down to one. If he fell asleep feeding but woke easily when I put him down I just took that as a sign that he wasn't sleepy enough and I didn't battle to try to get him to sleep, so there was no struggle or fuss, he just wasn't tired enough so I would wait until the next feed to try again.

[mum_inlove]

:hugs: Sounds like you're needing a few of these.:hugs:

When my kids were 10 months old, they were having 2 sleeps. One in the morning, and one in the afternoon.

Does your dd has a comfort, like a dummy or soft teddy? My ds has 2 soft puppies that he cuddles to sleep, he still does now he's 2,5 years old. Dd has a snuggle blanket. Most of the time, they go to sleep without needing any help, but some days they need the extra cuddles.

I chose to put them in a routine with sleeping. It doesn't always goes the same, but most of the time it works. I'll start by watching the clock to see what time they get tired. I'll put them to bed at the same time every day. It took a couple of days until they're starting to get tired at the same time every day. If they're not tired, I'll let them have a longer play, then I'll try to put them down again. But you know, of course it's easier said than done. Some children respond well to routine, some like to do it their own. My children now both get tired by 12pm, they both go to have a nap sometimes 1-3hours each. People can't believe that I can get a long nap, too:D

If it's too much for both of you. Try to catch up on sleep on weekend. When my kids were still little, we used to take turn. I'd stay awake, while dh had a snooze. Then he was up and I went to have a nap. It worked good :laughing:

:hugs: HTH

[mim1]

Have you taken dd to your GP? My ds got his first ear infections at 10 months and apart from waking over and over again at night, there was no other sign. I tried everything without success, then mum had him for a day and took him to her GP and sure enough - he had an ear infection. No amount of controlled crying will work in that situation.

Controlled crying is what did work for us in the end (at 15 months after he had tubes put in his ears) and consistency between all caregivers is essential. Challenging, but essential (I'm a big softie and found it quite hard in the early days).

big :hugs:

[quaver]

:hugs::hugs:
My ds never ever sleeps in the pram!! i know the feeling!

at 10 months ds was starting to drop his morning sleep. so if we were not busy he would be a struggle in the morning. at night he would be in bed by 6.30 on the dot.

sometimes he would be good other times not. teething effected him a lot at this age.
also growth spurts would sometimes make sleep a struggle. make sure he is eating enough food during the day as this made a difference in how well he slept.
keep constant and strong. get really busy during wake times and put strong cues for sleep. ie during the day- lunch, nappy change, bottle, story, soft toy, sleeping bag, door shut.
:hugs::hugs: it will not last long.

[Bell & Bug]

I have gotten her checked by a GP, and he said that she is 100% healthy. That was a number of weeks ago though. Thing is, she doesnt have a temp to indicate a infection.

She is generally happy, but the moment you take her into her room to put her down for a sleep she starts crying. Its OK during the day, she seems to go down easy, but when its her final bedtime she will kick up the biggest fuss ever.
She sleeps through once she is asleep, unless we make a loud and sudden sound.

I just dont know, im at a complete loss as to what to do and whats going on.
I must be the worlds worst mum :(

[quaver]

:hugs:babydesigner- you are not the worst mum in the world! They are just challenging little munchkins! Some nights it takes a lot to get the down. you seem like you are doing all the right things. just persist and it will work. how are you doing the cc?

[Kayangel]

First of all i would like to start with saying your not the worlds worst mum :hugs:. Some babies sleep, some dont. Please dont get urself down.

My DS is nearly 10 mths so i will answer your question, DS has a morning sleep from 10am till 11:30am then a afternoon sleep from 3pm till 4:30pm and at night he sleeps though 7:30pm till 8am. For all sleeps he falls off as soon as i put him down, he has a dummy and cuddly teddy.

My son is a good sleeper but he is a diffcult baby, i guess "most" babies all have something, he is very sooky and is a cryer :rolleyes: but most of that comes from bordom because he cant crawl or walk either that or he doesnt get his own way.

What cant ur DF handle the crying? All babies cry he needs to understand that. I hope things get better between u both.

[happybunnypony]

:hugs: baby designer :hugs:

it's soo hard knowing what to do sometimes. My bubs is 9 and half months old - so almost there! My DP and I would sometimes get funny with each other over what to do if DS was crying when we put him down. The main this is to be supportive of each other. Sometimes I was the softy and sometimes he was the softy. :o
Our night routine is between 5 - 6pm and is pretty solid now with food, bath, boob, blankie in bed. I find the bath/shower really good - by the time i'm putting his nappy on he's yawning his head off and is sooo pooped.

I do agree to tire them out during their awake times - maybe an outing after the last nap - lots of attentive playing with them?
Please try and talk to your DP and tell him you need his help and support. I can understand how partners struggle in the first year... communication is key though.

OOH and my DS wont sleep in pram or car much these days either. :no: So i make sure i time my outings during his awake time - so that as soon as i get home from an outing - he's pooped and i put him straight into the cot :thumbsup:

[UsThreeGirls]

Has dd always been like this? My DD has reflux which makes her wake constantly, has she been checked for this? Also call the child health centre to see if there is anything like Ellen Barron Family Centre which is a week stay for sleeping/feeding issues. I did this and found it helped.
Good luck

[Bell & Bug]

Nah she doesnt have reflux, I have had her checked out for that and other possibilities. But yes she has been like this all the time. I guess she is just one of those babies that dont go to sleep easily lol.

I was thinking, she doesnt have 3 solid feeds a day, maybe this is why im having troubles with her getting to sleep?
I mean I offer them all to her, she just refuses at least one of the feeds, and half of another feed.

[Pinkarella]

I don't know if this will help. My DD2 just turned 10 months but I tried the CC when she was tiny, can't remember exactly how old, maybe around 2 months old (I know now that you shouldn't before they are 6 months), I kind of thought that she had to learn to sleep as to not disrupt the family's routine (my DD1 had slept through the night since she was 5 months old).

It kind of worked at the beginning but I noticed that she would start crying as soon as we walked in to her bedroom and instead of crying for less time everyday, she would cry for longer. She was getting bad associations with sleep time and instead of being a nice, warm time it was stressful for everyone, especially for me as I couldn't stand hearing her screams. After a couple of weeks I decided that as she is most likely going to be my last baby and babyhood lasts so little I was going to let her sleep the way she wanted. For the day time I used a sling and at night time I would sing to her or put soft music and sway with her until she fell asleep. After a while, I would put her down when she was almost asleep and after a while again I would put her down just as she got sleepy and so on, and you know what? it worked, bedtime started to be a nice time for her again. When that happened I would just give her a hug and put her to bed, sometimes she cried but if she did I would come back, pick her up, cuddle her and put her back That was a while ago, now i just put her to bed, she plays for a bit and puts herself to sleep. Every so often I get a few days of cries but I always come back to shush her or pick her up and rock her in my arms. If she wakes in the night (not very often) I wait a couple of minutes, normally she always goes to sleep on her own again.

In the last couple of weeks her morning nap was getting later and later so I decided to cut her to one nap a day, meaning she goes down at 12 or 12.30 and sleeps until 4, down again at 7.30 and sleeps until 8am.

I think what I'm trying to say is that CC doesn't work for every family. I remember being very anxious and snappy during that time, it was my physical reaction to Evie's cries, and taking that out in my husband and DD1. Once I relaxed about it I was more patient and therefore my baby relaxed too. But if it doens't happen, trust your instintcs and you'll find the best way to get your baby to sleep. We read everywhere that babies shouldn't be rocked/fed/cuddle/have a dummy to sleep but only you know what's best for your child and for you, AND you are not a bad mother. Lots of :hugs:.

Ah, and Evie won't sleep in the pram or car either but sometimes she sleeps in the ergo (baby carrier) when I'm out and about

[Pinkarella]

You were also asking about 10 months old, well Evie is crawling and pulling herself up. She says a few words: daddy, ta (for thanks) and ba ba (for bye-bye). She has 3 bottles and 3 meals a day but only dinner is a big meal, the other two are mostly snack-size. She used to have two naps but now she only sleeps at lunchtime.

She is very easy going but has started throwing tanties when you don't let her have/do what she wants. Loves going out, as soon as she sees me getting the pram she gets all excited and is getting very sociable, smiling, crawling away and exploring when we go to playgroup for example but shies away if strangers try to hold her.

This is fun age!

[jaesmummy]

Hi there! Oh my goodness, you are NOT a bad mum at all! I have a 10 month old, and he's my FIFTH baby and I STILL scratch my head and cry and get confused about what to do sometimes. He can completely bamboozle me at times. Anyway, I'll give you some idea of what I do. I hope it might help you a little bit. My little person is like yours through the day, sleeps quite well, usually gets up early, around 6am, has a bottle, has brekky at 8am, watches Sesame Street, and goes down for morning nap around 9 or 9.30am. He sleeps until about 10.30 or 11 and the process is repeated for lunch. Another sleep around 1.30 till about 3pm. Then he plays until dinner at 5pm and last bottle at about 5.30pm. Then it's the night time drama. If I try to put him in bed before 7.30, he'll scream his head off! I tried controlled crying, which worked at first, but doesn't now. So now I try this night, night routine thing that I think works really well. He still won't go down early, but I'm happy for 7.30 ish as long as he's not whinging the whole time, then I put him in the cot regardless - I won't have him whining and sooking all night. So after that 5.30 bottle, he has a nice warm lavender bath. He has a quiet play with us and he sits with us on the couch and watches a bit of TV. When it's 7.30, he kisses and cuddles everyone good night, gets his dummy and teddy, goes in the bedroom. I put on a lullaby CD and turn the lights out and down he goes. He seems really happy when I do this whole routine like he knows to expect it. If I try to do it without the routine, he cracks up! I hope you might find this a bit helpful to try. You're probably doing something similar anyway. But I just found he appreciates the big bedtime wind down thing. Good luck with everything, babies are so smart, it's all trial and error really to see what works best. Oh, and he won't sleep in the pram unless he's absolutely wrecked! So I do all the outings between sleep times where possible. Otherwise I feel really stressed trying to rush around while he's fussing and sooking. Leanne :flowerz:

[UsThreeGirls]

AT Ellen Barron house I tried a gentle form of cc.
It started out with me patting dd in the cot til she went to sleep, when she woke up, not get her out but pat in cot again.
After a couple of days I progressed to just having my hand on her, no pat pat, same when she woke.
Then just sitting next to the cot, no hands in, just saying sh sh, very gently, same when she woke.
Then I moved my chair close to the door and eventually outside the door, she could still see me, then eventually outside, she could still hear my sh sh though.
Now dd will go down by herself but I am close enough to sh sh. She goes down within 10 mins, usually playing first.
Still she has days when she needs a bit more so don't be too hard on yourself if you need to sometimes spend more time or going back to patting every now and then.
When dd learnt to stand on the side of her cot, it got bad again and I had to go back to being in the room patting. Some days she is still very difficult. Stick with the routine though.
At night I let dd cry for about a minute or so but any more than that and it gets too hard to get her back down as she is too upset. I also try sh sh first and that works well, as she sleeps in the room with me and I don't have to get out of bed.
Until a week ago I was still giving her a breast feed (sometimes 2) every night at about 12am.
She is 10.5 months but only 8 months corrected age, but I feel she acts more like her real age now.
She has 3 meals a day and 2 snacks.
If you can't get her to eat meals have you tried lots of finger foods, its more fun for her and at least she gets something.
Also I give her as many breast feeds as she wants in the day, I was trying to stick to 4 but she really needed more and is happier now.
Hope this has been more help.

[UsThreeGirls]

AT Ellen Barron house I tried a gentle form of cc.
It started out with me patting dd in the cot til she went to sleep, when she woke up, not get her out but pat in cot again.
After a couple of days I progressed to just having my hand on her, no pat pat, same when she woke.
Then just sitting next to the cot, no hands in, just saying sh sh, very gently, same when she woke.
Then I moved my chair close to the door and eventually outside the door, she could still see me, then eventually outside, she could still hear my sh sh though.

Now dd will go down by herself but I am close enough to sh sh. She goes down within 10 mins, usually playing first.
Still she has days when she needs a bit more so don't be too hard on yourself if you need to sometimes spend more time or going back to patting every now and then.
When dd learnt to stand on the side of her cot, it got bad again and I had to go back to being in the room patting. Some days she is still very difficult. Stick with the routine though.
At night I let dd cry for about a minute or so but any more than that and it gets too hard to get her back down as she is too upset. I also try sh sh first and that works well, as she sleeps in the room with me and I don't have to get out of bed.
Until a week ago I was still giving her a breast feed (sometimes 2) every night at about 12am.
She is 10.5 months but only 8 months corrected age, but I feel she acts more like her real age now.
She has 3 meals a day and 2 snacks.
If you can't get her to eat meals have you tried lots of finger foods, its more fun for her and at least she gets something.
Also I give her as many breast feeds as she wants in the day, I was trying to stick to 4 but she really needed more and is happier now.
Hope this has been more help.

:wave:forgot to add she slept through for the first time 2 nights ago:yelclap: but not last night!:laughing:
And if she is sick or teething I bring her in bed, but get back to the routine after.:sleeping:

[babygizaiah]

I had a great baby until he turned 6mths old right up until he was 10mths old. Gizaiah was teething really badly but he didnt get his first tooth until 10mths once he got it I had my gorgeous little boy back. During that time I was walking around like a bloody zombie.

Now he has 2 3hr naps and sleeps a solid 13hrs at night. Down at 7pm on the dot and up around the 8am mark give or take. I feel brand new again.

Anyway some suggestions if the problem is night sleeping:

- give her a dream feed if your finding shes hungry during the night

- if its an attachment problem and shes finding it hard settling away from her I used the trick of putting something in his cot that was a familiar smell of mine. Like a used breast pad, sounds gross but it actually works

- if its hot he will not settle unless he has a cool bath and then has the ceiling fan on and window open

- massage and some soft music playing in their room, so they dont feel alone (also have a night light on)

- if its teething related then try Brauers teething relief tablets that was the best purchase I ever made

- start teaching her to settle herself. I never did this til about 2mths ago (ds is 1 now) persistance is the key. It will be hard the first few times and she will cry and cry but it will eventually pay off

- dummy

- and thats all I can think off right now, but everything is worth a try. You a definitely not a bad mum. We would be living in a perfect world if our kids never put a foot wrong. Well we dont live in a perfect world haha......... You will find something that works it just takes abit of time.

[Bell & Bug]

Thank you all so much for your replies.
The past two days I have been wondering where the monster baby has gotten to, she has been an absolute princess.
Only thing Ive really done differently is I've fed her food that I know she will eat most of it, and she has eaten at every meal (she isnt so keen on lumpy foods so Ive just fed her pureed foods that she WILL eat and not really fussed much about lumpy foods). She goes down to sleep without crying :D

So maybe she just needed to be 'fuller', or maybe its just coincidence?