23 month old, 3 month old and 4 weeks pregnant

[BayleysMum]

I am so scared. I have just found out I am pregnant again. My DS2 turns 12 weeks tomorrow and DS1 turns 2 in 1 and a half weeks. Has anybody else been in this situation. My partner does not want to continue with the pregnancy but I am just not sure if I can go through an abortion. We are financially stable and would be able to provide for another bub. We want more children down the track but it is just so soon after DS2 was born. Help me, I need some advice from people who have three under three!!! I am so scared.

[Lil Flower]

:hugs: I believe that everything happens for a reason. :)

[2girls&1boy]

I haven't been in your situation but wanted to give you some:hugs:.

I truly believe you are noy given more than you can handle in life. Yes you and DH will have some pretty tough times ahead but in the big scheme of this it is really only for a brief time.

Have you got family & friends around for support??

[Lunar]

:hugs: I believe that everything happens for a reason. :)

I am a firm believer of this too.

:hugs:

[gizmoduckus]

I truly believe you are noy given more than you can handle in life. Yes you and DH will have some pretty tough times ahead but in the big scheme of this it is really only for a brief time.

:iagree:

[twinkleprincess]

I know the most amazing person who i chat to on here she has 3 boys under 3 2 of whom has reflux she is amazing and her will is just outstanding i believe u can do anything!!!

You will be the same i agree with all pp's that things happen for a reason

[stardance]

i know a lovely lady who has 3 under 3, it takes a lot of organisation and she has a wonderful partner who is very hands on and supportive.

it can definitely work.

you and your hubby need to make the decision together.

i would be in shock especially if my second was only 3 months old.
but i'm sure this would be a normal reaction.
you definitely need to sit down and have an open discussion on both your feelings and what will be best for your family :)

i'm sure everything will work out best for your family whatever you decide. :hugs:

[BayleysMum]

My partner has decided that he doesn't think it is the right time to have another baby. I am so upset at the moment and I don't even know that the right thing to do is.

[bel_aiden]

:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:

couldnt read and not give you some hugs!

[Sheer Bliss]

:hugs: :hugs: Sometimes life hands us things that we have no idea how to handle....and the only answer is that somehow you will fnd a way through to do the best thing for your family.

We planned my current pregnancy (although didn't really espect to conceive the first month!) but didn't plan for twins! Despite it being so exciting, it's also terrible scary. I will have 4 kids 4 and under, and TBH it scares the absolute cr@p out of me. I odn't know how i will do it, I am barely coping with the pregnancy. So just have to take one step at a time and deal with each day as it arrives. I hope it all works out for the best for you.

[sam's mum]

:hugs: I hope that you can find a way to make peace with your situation.

do you have support available? are there any community services available?

[2girls&1boy]

My partner has decided that he doesn't think it is the right time to have another baby. I am so upset at the moment and I don't even know that the right thing to do is.


Just remember not to do anything just because your partner feels it is not the right time. You will be in an even worse place if you go and terminate and am then filled with resentment/anger towards your partner. To be honest there is never a perfect time to have children. Just make sure YOU are truly happy with your decision. :hugs: :hugs:

[FireflyFamily]

Just wanted to say that having kids close together is the best!

I had 3 in 3.5 years (a bit further apart from yours, but still close).

My first two are 17 months apart (my DS was 8 months when I fell pregnant) and the 2nd and 3rd are 26 months apart.

I love having my kids close together, and if we have a 5th, I would want a closer gap again.

Best wishes for whatever you decide!!!

[anka2722]

It's a decision that you both need to make together, one partner can not dictate to the other, as this will have large reprecussions regardless of whichever way you go. And the last thing you need regardless of which way you go is one partner resenting the other, as that would be extremely fatal to your relationsip.

[HART]

Hi I am in a similar situation though have a slighter larger gap than you do... my oldest is 32 months, my second son is five months old and I am about 7 weeks pregnant with my third.... like you we planned on having more children down the track... when I got pregnant - it was such a shock at first... and the whole thing scares me - how does one cope with 3 little ones..I though I believe it was obviously meant to be and will cope one day at a time and try and be organised as possible to make things smoother sailing...

My partner is very supportive about the pregnancy though he does do fly in fly out (two weeks away one home) so it will be me doing most of the work..

I wish you best of luck with you decision and hope you make the right one for you

:):):)

[madboysnmummy]

I have!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You can do it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! If I can anyoune can!!

I have a 28 month old
a 16 month old
and a 13 week old

all 3 in nappies still and all boys.

my body coped ok, but it was tough in the last few weeks

I had all three c/sections.

no more babies for me though my uterus was thin and torn on the table, but im ok with that. Everyone is well loved and well behaved and i have them all sleeping between 1 and 3-3.30

it took me a couple months to feel like im in control and we have tough days, but mainly due to ds3 and his reflux.

if you ask would I have it this way again i would say DEFINATELY!!!!

[FiveInTheBed]

:hugs:

I had 3 under 19months...and yep it was tough at times..but would not have had it any other way!!

It is lovely having them close together, they grow up as little besties (most of the time) and the 'time off' you have doing all the baby stuff is over and done with quicker than spreading it out over a longer time frame.
When you new littlie comes along you older two will hopefully be able to sit together and play, and show some interest in having a new baby brother or sister to adore.
You can have play dates and outings where everyone is happy and the play is all age appropriate at the same time!!

Have you got friends and family near by? Be OPEN to help!! accept it with a smile, it is good to have another adult that your other two feel comfortable with and that you trust to be able to have some one on one time with your new bub.

Maybe you partner is over whelmed, and understandably so...but sit and have a serious talk...plenty of people have babies close together and more often than not think it is absolutely wonderful and has many many positives.


:goodvibes: best of luck!!

[mejoolie]

Hello,
Just thought I’d wish you both luck with your decision. It’s sad when your not on the same page.

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

[BayleysMum]

I want to thank everyone so much for their advice. It has been great just having people listen while I try to sort all of this out.

My DPs mind is not going to change, so I have a big decision to make. I really want to keep the bub and after hearing other peoples stories of how much they love it and that they are able to cope I too think that I will be able to cope. I really want to keep the bub and I wanted more kids anyway so why not now if I am already pregnant? My family are not close and I only have one brother who I never really got along with, so I would like a biggish family [4 kids] and having them close together is a bonus I think.

Anyway I am going to go and lie back down while the boys are asleep because I am so tired. I really want to thank everybody from the bottom of my heart. You are all wonderful people who are making this much easier for me to deal with.

[~Temet Nosce~]

I think your amazing just coping with the 3month old and toddler, I want another baby but when I think of handling a newborn and a toddler I go into panic mode, how do you do it? lol.
I think you will be fine :)

[bgbgbb]

I really feel for you, it's hard enough being newly pregnant and having little ones without the pressure of a partner who does not support you.

I had 4 under 4 and a half when my youngest was born. It was busy and as mentioned before, being organised was essential. Also, my husband's work had him away from home more and more, so I did a lot on my own. But my kids are a lot better behaved than some of my friends kids, and they only have 2 each. They are constantly entertaining each other and have no trouble adjusting to kindergarten or school, as they're already used to being one of many.

If you feel that YOU can handle an extra baby then that it the main thing. You will be the one doing most of the work.

And you have all of us to cry or whinge to, so you're not alone. :hugs:

[OJandMe]

I had 3 under 3... and then 4 under 4.

And it was no cheesecake at first, but it's so great now :)

I won't lie, the first 6 months are hard... but honestly, what's 6 months really??? In the scope of things.

They're all close and excellent mates.

Even my 18month old just loves his little brother.

You can do it!!! And when bubba is 12 months old you'll wonder why you ever thought it would be hard.

:hugs:

Congratulations on your pregnancy!

[korina]

I was (am) in pretty much the same situation. I had number 2 when my DS1 was 22 months, then found out I was pregnant with #3 when DS2 was 4 months old.

Like you, we had planned another but hadn't actively started "trying" but it happened immediately. We had a chat in August and decided to have 3 kids, and by the end of the month, we were up the duff! All I can say is that this baby is supposed to be here!

I was a bit shocked, and pretty scared (still am sometimes) but I know I can do it. I figure I just have to get myself super organised.

I was scared when pregnant with #2 as well, because I didn't know how I would cope without much family help. Well, basically no family help really. And now, almost 10 months later, I look back and wonder what I was so scared about.

My two boys LOVE each other - the older one plays with his little brother and loves to jump around and make him laugh, and the younger chases DS1 around the room and you can see he just adores him already! It is just so sweet and I think it will be even better when #3 arrives (also a boy!).

I'm sorry you don't have the support of your partner, but I do agree with the pp's in that you shouldn't make a decision that you don't think is right just because your partner says so.

I KNOW you can do it! And the fact that you are/were worried about how you would cope shows that you are a good mum because you care. :yes:

How can you possibly go wrong when you have their best interests at heart? It will be hard but you will manage and will be so glad when you look at your 3 little monsters!

Anyway, that's enough from me now... good luck! :hugs:

[BayleysMum]

My partner changed his mind!!! I didn't have to try to convince him. The day I told him I was pregnant he was very against having another baby but he went to work the next day and came home and said that he wanted to keep the baby. I am very happy. Now I am just worried about telling people because I think that their reactions will be less than great.

I know that it is probably going to be quite difficult raising three babies close together but I know it will all be worth it when they get a little older and can all play together. Both mine and my DPs family live close so they are able to help us if we need it. My DP works long hours so I guess I will just have to be super organised and prepare for baby no. 3 which I hope is a girl because I have 2 boys atm.

The more I think about being pregnant again the more exciting and less scary it gets. I am glad my DP changed his mind!!! :):yelclap::)

[FiveInTheBed]

that's lovely news!!!:goodvibes:

so glad your hubby has let it sink in and is supporting you.
Don't worry about what other people say...there are NO 'rules' when it comes to the order of your children...and all those 'Don't you have a TV?' comments come from boring people who lack spontaneity!!!

Best of luck with your new little family...sounds like you have a great support base, and a good plan...you'll have a ball!!:goodvibes:

[Jakois]

My partner changed his mind!!! I didn't have to try to convince him. The day I told him I was pregnant he was very against having another baby but he went to work the next day and came home and said that he wanted to keep the baby. I am very happy. Now I am just worried about telling people because I think that their reactions will be less than great.

I know that it is probably going to be quite difficult raising three babies close together but I know it will all be worth it when they get a little older and can all play together. Both mine and my DPs family live close so they are able to help us if we need it. My DP works long hours so I guess I will just have to be super organised and prepare for baby no. 3 which I hope is a girl because I have 2 boys atm.

The more I think about being pregnant again the more exciting and less scary it gets. I am glad my DP changed his mind!!! :):yelclap::)

Thats wonderful news :smiliedance:. Congratulations on your pregnancy:).

[GiggleBerry]

:smiliedance::smiliedance:so glad your DP changed his mind. Good luck I'm sure you'll be fine!:smiliedance::smiliedance:

[Jelly Baby]

That's fantastic news.

CONGRATULATIONS :yelclap::yelclap::yelclap:

:fingerscrossed: for a lovely little girl :p

[sam's mum]

My partner changed his mind!!! I didn't have to try to convince him. The day I told him I was pregnant he was very against having another baby but he went to work the next day and came home and said that he wanted to keep the baby. I am very happy. Now I am just worried about telling people because I think that their reactions will be less than great.

I know that it is probably going to be quite difficult raising three babies close together but I know it will all be worth it when they get a little older and can all play together. Both mine and my DPs family live close so they are able to help us if we need it. My DP works long hours so I guess I will just have to be super organised and prepare for baby no. 3 which I hope is a girl because I have 2 boys atm.

The more I think about being pregnant again the more exciting and less scary it gets. I am glad my DP changed his mind!!! :):yelclap::)

I am so happy for you :yelclap:

[korina]

That's great news!!!! :yelclap:

Very happy for you!

[SuperGranny]

hi bayleysmum , you can do it and I'm so glad you are going to go ahead. I managed three under two, and it was hard work but so many great experiences. You will have plenty of support, and lots of advice and help here too. Just take one day at a time, dont put any stress on yourself about the housework, one small step at a time, is the only way to cope. Best wishes, Marie.

[mumslilspunks]

Congratualtions and im glad hubby changed his mind!!:yelclap:
How cares what other pepole think aslong as you and hubby are is doesnt really matter!

[bgbgbb]

Ah, 3 close together is nothing, I'm sure hardly anyone will have a negative reaction, especially if you are happy about it.

I'm dreading the reaction to just about everyone I know when I tell them (still have to confirm it, but I know;) I am preg) I'm having my 5th, which will give me 4 pre-schoolers and 1 in prep. And all this after having my last pregnany with severe pelvic instability that had me on crutches (and has a good chance of recurring)!

Seriously, I'm really happy for you. My hubby was also not thrilled with the idea of another one, but I said to him, "you forget to put the condom on, you deal with 8 months of me being hormonal and grumpy-you might remember next time!"