Just a lil infomation please :)

[ForeverMine]

Just after a bit of infomation. Hopefully it won't come to this, but I need to be prepared.

The other night my DP and I were talking about if we weren't to live together and not be together, who would our baby live with. Now I straight away planned to be a SAHM and I just assumed DP would have the baby at my house and would know he could see Jelly (bub) whenever he wanted, no restrictions etc. DP plans to be in the army within 6 months as well, which is December, and Jel's not due till December anyway.

So naturally I thought I'd be the SAHM while he was off doing his army thing. However, DP turned around to me that night and bluntly and honesty said, that if we weren't together, he'd want full custody of Jelly and didn't care if I only saw her every fortnight. Now I know that sounds rude and selfish and mean and all that, but that's the way he is. Not rude etc, but extremely honest and blunt.

I sorta went, whoa what the heck! But then again I may be making something out of nothing, because he had quite a few drinks under his belt. He doesn't remember anything that happened that night, the next morning. Yes, lol, we were at the pub talking about our child, I wasn't drinking, never fear. He always say's stupid stuff when he's been drinking, but when I really think about it, it's something he would do.

So, after all that my question is, does anyone know how I can get infomation on custody, all that mumble jumble? It makes my head numb just thinking about it. But i need to know what can/may happen, because there is not only my life to think of, but Jelly's as well.

Hopefully, nothing will come out of what he said, but I just want to be safe.

Cheers, Christie :)

[bishmum]

Christie

I'm pretty sure that there would be no way that he would be able to get full time custody of your baby if he was going into the army!! Who would look after the baby???

You should give Legal Aid a call and they may be able to help you. They can provide free legal advice.

Good luck and I don't think that you should worry too much.

:thumbsup:

[Jem]

You could go down to your local court house, and get some information on residency orders :)

[Veritas]

I think, unless you were the worst mother in the world... the best he could hope for is shared custody arrangements....

[lovingmumof 2now]

In my experience, men are all enthusiastic about having custody (full) of their children but in reality would not be able to cope.

I was worried my ex was going to try to get custody of my son so I went to legal aid. They were great they made it clear for me. And basically he would probably have to fight hard for it. The only thing he would get is joint custody which I think would be terrible for the children, having one week on one week off.


Hopefully this will never be an issue for you though. Men are so funny when they are drunk, they say the craziest things.

[SamanthaJane]

My uncle couldnt even get full custody of his little daughter, and her mum was a deadbeat druggo with a mental disorder. Courts seem to rule in favour of the mother unless there is an extreme case against her. He only now has custody because she overdosed a few months ago- proving to be very very unfit for the role of a mother. You would have nothing to worry about if he did try it, unless of course u have the above qualities;)

[Daddy2Angels]

My uncle couldnt even get full custody of his little daughter, and her mum was a deadbeat druggo with a mental disorder. Courts seem to rule in favour of the mother unless there is an extreme case against her. He only now has custody because she overdosed a few months ago- proving to be very very unfit for the role of a mother. You would have nothing to worry about if he did try it, unless of course u have the above qualities;)

Not true!

My dad was in the army for 21 years and while in the army my Dad and my Mum split when I was 2.

Now my dad being well lets just say very vendictive at times always fights to win and that he did. He was the first father in Victoria to get SOLE CUSTODY of 5 kids. How is another story.

However, my DP and myself went through a rough spot and it come to custody stuff and in the end we realised what idiots we had both been (mainly ME being the idiot) and her taking me back would be up there along with the day DD was born :) every situation is different. But depending on what age the child is what level of care the child can receive from either parent all comes into consideration. Generally if they are young the courts like to keep the children with the mother. However it is always different. Me, I would rather work to the absolute end to make it work not only for the love of my DP but to provide a caring and loving environment for DD and DSS.

There is no greater joy than the smile on a childs face.