View Full Version : Would yoube/were you ok with DF seeing a stripper for his buck's night?
There's a current thread on this topic, that has brought out some strong opinions. I thought it would be interesting to see everyone's opinions displayed in a poll...
babygiggle
22-01-2009, 08:10
yes i'm completely fine with it...
MothersMilk
22-01-2009, 08:13
I DH had a stripper on his bucks night. Honestly i didn't bother me. It's not like he goes to see ladies strip all the time - it was a one off thing. I saw the photos and heard the stories and i know it was harmless.
No problems here.
Mathermy
22-01-2009, 08:22
What a way to celebrate his ensuing commitment to me-letting some random naked woman writhe all over him! :laughing:
errr no. I just can't see the point of it, it seems very immature.
Fuchsia!
22-01-2009, 08:24
It wouldn't bother me, i would trust him.
What a way to celebrate his ensuing commitment to me-letting some random naked woman writhe all over him! :laughing:
errr no. I just can't see the point of it, it seems very immature.
:iagree:
My ex fiance knew that if he had strippers at his bucks night, I would have walked out right there and then (well, I did anyway because he had been having an affair :laughing: but that's not the point).
He was big on strippers and it took me years and years to get him to even slightly start respecting my feelings. He would often come home and tell me about how hot/great they were, even when I was heavily pregnant :( I used to feel 'ok' about it, but he honestly made me realise what men really think and feel about strippers :barf:
grass is always greener
22-01-2009, 08:28
I have absolutely no problem with at all.
I am not sure he would want one, but he is more than welcome to have one.
DH didnt have a stipper at his bcks night but it wouldnt have bothered me if he he did, If either I would prefer him to go to a club with strict rules and regs as to what the girls do, purely becuase I dont like the private industry as alot of the times the women are put and put them selfs in comproming situations so I wouldnt like him giving money to an agency like that, But a strip club wouldnt bother me in the slightest
He was best man in a wedding beroe our wedding and the guy wanted Skimp waitresses and then to go t a club and I helped DH find a skimpy girls so that i knew that they was girls from one of the more suitable agencys
He went to the club after wards but he new most of the girls through me lol so it kind of takes the fun out of it when there asking so hows your misses lol
I dont see anything wrong with it at all.
He knows where his breads buttered, I trust him and we have mutual respect for each other & he has no hidden intentions when/if he does go to strip joints.
DH isnt under the thumb either and is free to do what he likes when he likes, as long as i know where he is & it doesnt interfere with family plans.
If its a boys night out, or a bucks, and they go see strippers - then so be it. If of course he was doing it just for the hell of it for no reason I'd probably question it and be disappointed... but he wouldnt - its a 'special occassion' thing with the boys.
He knows where his breads buttered
I like this!
HelenHasTwins
22-01-2009, 08:57
No I didn't mind, it didn't worry me at all, I knew his friends were getting him one from the start and I was fine with it, I trust him totally, and the story goes when she did a dance for him he said " your (.)(.) are no were near as nice as my Helen's:laughing: And then couldn't stop talking about me....he had had a few to drink so it would have been really funny.
SassyMummy
22-01-2009, 09:12
I would prefer he didn't.
However, if he ever did get married and have a bucks night, he wouldn't be doing it for himself.
He HATES going out, anywhere. It's his 21st next week, and he won't even go out to dinner for it. He's such a homebody, and dislikes social events.
Knowing that, I'd feel a lot better. He wouldn't have organised it, he wouldn't want to go... it would likely be his BIL organising it most likely, and just using the bucks night as an excuse.
faroutbrusselsprout
22-01-2009, 09:17
Unfortunately it has nothing to do with DH.
He is lovely and respectful and has no interest in going anyway but....
It all comes down to my insecurities and at this point in my life my self esteem wouldn't cope with him looking at/getting turned on by another woman. :no:
sockstealingpoltergeist
22-01-2009, 09:17
It wouldn't bother me, i would trust him.
I trust my husband too, or I wouldn't be with him.
However going to strippers is a violation of my trust.
No I am not OK with him being innvolved in the trading of the flesh, it is never OK for whatever reason.
I also trust him to respect all women, and I am secure enough in myself to let him know that it is a deal breaker.:)
sockstealingpoltergeist
22-01-2009, 09:21
I would prefer he didn't.
However, if he ever did get married and have a bucks night, he wouldn't be doing it for himself.
He HATES going out, anywhere. It's his 21st next week, and he won't even go out to dinner for it. He's such a homebody, and dislikes social events.
Knowing that, I'd feel a lot better. He wouldn't have organised it, he wouldn't want to go... it would likely be his BIL organising it most likely, and just using the bucks night as an excuse.
My husband wouldn't organise to go to strippers either, however he does have free will so I would expect him to use it to say NO.:yes:
SassyMummy
22-01-2009, 09:47
He would do what was easier. I know that now, in the earlier stages of the relationship, and I'm fine with that. :)
Saying no, in this instance, would cause issues. It would cause his family to whinge and b*tch and talk about how whipped he is, and blah blah blah.
His sister and her partner would probably make a massive deal about it...
It would affect me too, and I'd be happier if he just went and avoided that, rather than said no and we had to deal with that cr*p as a result.
Some people are "man enough" to say no... but in some situations, it's easier to just... go with it.
I'm happy to put up with the whole stripper thing to avoid that. Me knowing he doesn't want to be there would be more than enough for me to be comfortable with the situation. If he was the one eager to go, then, well, I'd feel pretty rubbishy.
NewBeginnings
22-01-2009, 09:53
Nope I wouldn't be ok with it :no:
IMO it's wrong, derogatory and just not needed in any sense.:no:
PunkyDiva
22-01-2009, 09:56
Nope, strippers are long gone for hens/bucks nights with spa days, golf, go cart racing, wine tasting etc etc up there as the things to do now.
Just going with something too appease any friction, when it's something so derogatory and against your own morals is not an easy way out but a step in the direction of future situations where you will be expected to cow tow to pressure. Never be afraid to let your voice be heard especially when this is a man you are marrying for life and who's trust and support should be with you not his family.
Pina Colada
22-01-2009, 10:27
Yep - and didn't worry me in the least. I was far more worried that one of my friends would secretly organise a male stripper for me :dizzy:
And to really freak some of you out - he had his bucks night at our house and I do believe the stripper got changed in one of our bedrooms :laughing:
The men I know think strippers are more hilarious than sexy ;) (no offence to any strippers reading this....)
Mum&bubs
22-01-2009, 10:37
Nope. To me, I see strippers as a single-guy thing, not for a man who is about to get married. My DF has had plenty of years before I came on to go see as many strippers as he wanted to, so I wouldnt be happy if he got strippers for his buck party.
It's not that I don't trust him, I trust him 100%, I just don't like the thought of another woman rubbing herself over my DF naked, if he wants a lap dance, he has his own woman to get it from :yes:
The men I know think strippers are more hilarious than sexy ;) (no offence to any strippers reading this....)
I know many men that think the same.
Yes i would be ok with it. DF has quite a few single friends and i know thats where THEY would want to go, plus what guy would pass up a night out , shouted by his mates. DF said he sees it as another place to drink with his mates not look at girls.
BlakeNatsMum
22-01-2009, 10:42
Nope.. There was no strippers here, and I wouldn't have allowed it anyway.. :no: There is no way that any woman is going to rub herself over my husband.. that's for sure! :shame:
If he wanted that, he knows where to get it from.. :yes:
And that's how it works here..
The men I know think strippers are more hilarious than sexy ;) (no offence to any strippers reading this....)
ROFL i agree with him, and So does DH, Years ago I went t a party to pick a friend up and they had a dirty filthy girl there doing a show she was danceing around like she was the sexiext thing alive ( she wasnt ) and all the guys was laughing there heads of at her, I actualy felt sory for here I really did. But it was funny
NibbleCurlynBub
22-01-2009, 10:51
No, I wouldn't be ok with it.
Twisting the situation in the opposite direction, I asked him once how he would feel about me doing that and he said something about he wouldn't like it because he would think I would think about the male stripper when we have sex instead of him.
It was a while ago, but that was the gist of it.
He didn't have a buck's night, so that's a non issue.
But, it would not have bothered me - he is not attracted to anyone else but me (makes that very clear!), and I trust in our relationship. He's not the type to allow a naked woman (apart from me!) to rub herself on him anyway - he'd ask her not to!
One of our very best friends was a male stripper years ago, and DH was his bodyguard/roadie, so I know what the industry is like...he's been to strip clubs, and he made sure he sat at the bar - as far away from the "action" as possible. He was always far more clingy when he came home, because "they are scary women, honey!!" :laughing:
Pina Colada
22-01-2009, 10:53
ROFL i agree with him, and So does DH, Years ago I went t a party to pick a friend up and they had a dirty filthy girl there doing a show she was danceing around like she was the sexiext thing alive ( she wasnt ) and all the guys was laughing there heads of at her, I actualy felt sory for here I really did. But it was funny
:laughing: I know! We actually have photos of the stripper at my DH bucks doing her 'thang - and honestly 99% of the men are in fits of laughter! The only one that wasn't was the poor 30-something who had never had a girl - he was pretty enthralled ;)
And it is a bucks! It is not like they say, oh we're having an Australia Day BBQ, what's the strippers phone number again? IYKWIM. Anywho, that's JMO anyway :)
WorkingClassMum
22-01-2009, 10:54
I trust my husband too, or I wouldn't be with him.
However going to strippers is a violation of my trust.
No I am not OK with him being innvolved in the trading of the flesh, it is never OK for whatever reason.
I also trust him to respect all women, and I am secure enough in myself to let him know that it is a deal breaker.:)
:iagree: I view strippers in the same vein as pornography etc, and only one step removed from prostitution.
I trust MOTH implicitly, and I expect a him to respect me and all other women.
Other:
I think I could deal with a campy,over the top, silly stripper. I wouldnt mind the same for my hens night. A "Did anyone order a pizza", lets all have a giggle ordeal.
But an actual, get the buck off kinda thing :no:.
shockinamillion
22-01-2009, 10:58
I would not have an issue with it. I know that DP doesn't find that sort of thing a huge turn on. Not to mention knowing his mates they would probably dress one of them up all sexy and do a sexy (:barf:) man dance for him.
I just asked DP about this and we both feel the same about it. Not a problem because nothing serious happens. Not to mention DP never does this thing normally anyway, nor would he if he could, he finds it boring.
I wouldnt care in the slightest. I know how much he loves me, and is attracted to me, saggy skin/boobs, stretchmarks and all. As many people have said, I know he wouldnt organise it, its whatever his friends would organise for him, and it involves strippers or a club, then so be it. I want him to feel free to go and have a good night out with his friends, and if thats what it involves then so be it, its not like its every weekend! :D
MissSparkle
22-01-2009, 11:43
DH went to a strip club for his buck night...didn't bother me....he took me there a few months later! lol.
It certainly is a 'touchy' subject for some ;)
Interesting responses, and not that far off 50/50...
Didn't bother me in the slightest! I went to the male strippers for my hens night and he had a stripper here for his bucks...
We both had a big giggle together about it the next day!!
misskittyfantastico
22-01-2009, 19:56
My Dh didn't have strippers - never would have. Neither would I. My bro is getting married next month and DH is a groomsman. One of the pre-requisites from the groom was NO strippers.
I am completely against the dehumanisation of women in any way shape or form. This does not make me naive, prudish or repressed....I just believe we are more than tits and orrifices.
Rant over:D
cecandchels
22-01-2009, 20:05
I trust my husband too, or I wouldn't be with him.
However going to strippers is a violation of my trust.
No I am not OK with him being innvolved in the trading of the flesh, it is never OK for whatever reason.
I also trust him to respect all women, and I am secure enough in myself to let him know that it is a deal breaker.:)
:iagree:
MyFourCubs
22-01-2009, 20:14
DH isnt under the thumb either and is free to do what he likes when he likes
I would not consider my husband to be "under the thumb," either. He had the option of going to a strip club for his bucks night. I simply would not have been there when he got home.";)
I trust my husband- implicitely. That's not the point.We also have a "mutual respect," for one another. I believe that extends to respecting MY feelings when I would prefer for him not to have a naked woman writhing in his lap. Yes, I have body issues- I have had 3 children, a ceaserean and although I have worked hard to 'redeem" my figure:rolleyes: I am no penthouse pet. I do not need the further insecurity of knowing that a woman who looks much better than me has been fondling and / or gyrating in front of my husband. If he wants a naked, gyrating woman he can have me- for free!:)
mum2bubba
22-01-2009, 22:55
No I wouldn't want that. I wouldn't want some naked (or semi naked) all over him. I just wouldn't fee confortable. I wouldn't even want a male stripper myself.
I'd rather him just have a few drinks with his mates and go out for a game of pool or whatever. Yeah it might be boring but meh, I don't care.
dormouse
22-01-2009, 23:06
My DH had a stripper at his buck's night & I was fine with that. I also had a g-string waiter at my hen's night...
Saying that, my BIL (my DH was the best man) had a stripper & a topless waitress at his buck's night & long story short, my DH & BIL ended up licking salt for Tequilla slammers off the waitress's nipples :eek:. That, I have a problem with.
Pretty much, he can look, but touching (or licking) is going over the line. I don't allow him to attend strip shows any more.
dormouse
22-01-2009, 23:22
YUK YUK YUK YUK YUK :barf:
Imagine how many guys have licked that!! EEEW gonorrhea much? :laughing:
:laughing: Tell me about it! Needless to say, I didn't let him near me for a while after that... :barf:
No issue at all. I am not stupid enough to think he would cheat and he is not stupid enough to cheat.
reAllytee
23-01-2009, 02:17
No issue at all. I am not stupid enough to think he would cheat and he is not stupid enough to cheat.
:iagree:
But I do sorta take issue with the idea that he would need to do something like that ...
Thing is DP wouldnt LOL he wouldnt want to do anything like it so I dont have to worry LOL !
CaitlinArai22
23-01-2009, 05:30
i am surprised by the amount of responces saying "i'm fine with it, its not something he normally does, i know he finds me attractive, i know he respects me, i trust him, etc"
Its not something my dp does usually - so why does he need to do it the night he's preparing to commit himslef to me (not that hes not committed already!)
I know he finds me attractive - he doesnt need to PAY other girls to dance around him, because he finds me attractive, why would he want to look/pay others if hes happy with what hes got? that makes no sence to me - i let him look because i know he doesnt need/want to - then why is he?
I know he respects me - he proves that to me by being loyal and kind, respecting my feelings, and not giving me any reason to doubt his feelings/respect for me. this includes not risking causing me hurt by looking at other women.
I trust him. BECAUSE i know hes not interested in other women.
I dont quite understand the philosophy that its ok with a proffessional on a night like a bucks night.
I wouldnt feel any better knowing he wanted it so badly he'd pay for it! I would actually prefer to think he had gone out, met someone he connected with, and cheated on me for real emotions, then to think that he went out looking and he paid someone to dance/do something with him for shallow reasons. I wouldnt feel as slighted IYKWIM
I find it shocking people would say that not being ok with it is about insecurities - so what, if we were all completely secure i could let him sleep around cause i know that he still finds me more attractive and loves me most - then why the heck does he need to sleep around? doesnt make much sense does it?
Sheer Bliss
23-01-2009, 06:18
I WAS ok with it, we got married over 6years ago....we were younger, no kids, and everything was about partying and fun back then. I didn't see it as a sex thing, it was more that the other guys (who were mostly single - we were the first in our circle if friends to get married) wanted to have a laugh. I knew they would get one for him - so STRICT instructions for him to keep his mouth shut and his d!ick in his pants!! No matter how drunk he was. I also trusted the best man to look after him.....not to mention that my dad was going to be there! :laughing:.
IF we weren't married NOW, and it was ont he cards, so he was having a bucks show....I don't think i'd be OK with it. I'd be OK with them going to strip club, but no private lap dances, so one at the party wouldn't make me happy either. Life is different now to what it used to be, different pace, and different priorities, so it doesn't fit.
I think it can depend on the stage you are at in your life.......my friends had me wear a soap on a rope penis around my neck at my hens night, and as a challenge, i had to get another guys phone number at a bar (had a list of challenges....or have a shot of thier choosing at every bar). The whole point was to et blind drunk and laugh at me.....immature...:yes: Very, but we WERE at that stage in our life, and now, it's not something that i'd do - just a different time in our life.
Mathermy
23-01-2009, 07:02
i am surprised by the amount of responces saying "i'm fine with it, its not something he normally does, i know he finds me attractive, i know he respects me, i trust him, etc"
Its not something my dp does usually - so why does he need to do it the night he's preparing to commit himslef to me (not that hes not committed already!)
I know he finds me attractive - he doesnt need to PAY other girls to dance around him, because he finds me attractive, why would he want to look/pay others if hes happy with what hes got? that makes no sence to me - i let him look because i know he doesnt need/want to - then why is he?
I know he respects me - he proves that to me by being loyal and kind, respecting my feelings, and not giving me any reason to doubt his feelings/respect for me. this includes not risking causing me hurt by looking at other women.
I trust him. BECAUSE i know hes not interested in other women.
I dont quite understand the philosophy that its ok with a proffessional on a night like a bucks night.
I wouldnt feel any better knowing he wanted it so badly he'd pay for it! I would actually prefer to think he had gone out, met someone he connected with, and cheated on me for real emotions, then to think that he went out looking and he paid someone to dance/do something with him for shallow reasons. I wouldnt feel as slighted IYKWIM
I find it shocking people would say that not being ok with it is about insecurities - so what, if we were all completely secure i could let him sleep around cause i know that he still finds me more attractive and loves me most - then why the heck does he need to sleep around? doesnt make much sense does it?
Lol I agree, the logic is all a bit ironic really :laughing:
I don't think it is insecure to demand the upmost respect from your life partner ;) I personally wouldn't feel at ease with a man who thought this kind of behaviour was appropriate-a real turn off for me:barf:
Rabbity Babbity
23-01-2009, 09:10
For my DF's bucks night he is having a gaming party with his friends
**Cough**loser nerds**Cough**
I'm think it would be sooooo funny if I sent a stripper along to shock them....
lavagirl
23-01-2009, 09:43
Honestly, I don't see why a stripper is needed for a bucks party...sheesh, can't men think of something BETTER, fun and respectful???...lol
missie_mack
23-01-2009, 13:35
Whilst I trust my husband infinitely not to cheat on me I think he would lose my respect if he had decided to go and see stripers for his bucks night particularly because he had never done this kind of thing in all the years prior to getting married.
Personally I don't get the whole bucks night = strippers thing anyhow. It always comes across so passe :rolleyes: Anyone getting married should have already made promises of fidelity and if they hadn't I don't think putting a ring on their finger will really make any difference. Besides that most couples have cohabitated prior to marriage so its not like they really have been single for quite sometime.
Dh didn't really want anything at all as his brother didn't have anything a couple of years prior. However I coerced him into going out to dinner with some mates and playing poker after.... and even then most of them had no real idea how to play :laughing: :laughing:
lavagirl
23-01-2009, 13:40
Anyone getting married should have already made promises of fidelity and if they hadn't I don't think putting a ring on their finger will really make any difference. Besides that most couples have cohabitated prior to marriage so its not like they really have been single for quite sometime.
:iagree: NOOOO need for strippers...just disrespectful.
babygizaiah
31-01-2009, 22:09
no It wouldn't bother me, but I must say I am glad that df isnt into that stuff. Hes quite shy about stuff like that and is one of the only men I know that dont get into porn. Lucky me haha........
sockstealingpoltergeist
31-01-2009, 22:31
I reckon.
DF said: "Most strippers Ive seen are feral anyways. Look like they've popped out six kids, they have saggy boobs, stretchmarks and half of them arent even pretty"... that makes me feel better haha.
I dont get why everyone is saying men are disrespecting women by seeing a stripper. Strippers are putting themselves in that situation to be disrespected and looked at like a piece of meat. They know full well what everyone thinks of them, and I dont think they are 'victims' like everyone makes them out to be.
I don't know what you think of strippers, but I feel for them, they have obviously recieved the message that to have some value and earn money it is a good idea to become a peice of meat. If men are looking at these women as purely sexual objects and they usually are, then they are disrespecting all women.
If men didn't go to strip clubs and learnt to repsect women and value them as people then there wouldn't be strippers. There would be so much more value in being a woman and all the wonderful things that can bring.
If your DF really felt these women were so unattatractive then why is he bothering to even go??? besides alot of women could be described like that, are women only worth what their bodies look like, how perky their boobs are etc etc???
besides alot of women could be described like that, are women only worth what their bodies look like, how perky their boobs are etc etc???
Totally agree with that!
So if I pop out a lot of kids which would result in my body not looking like an 18 year old's anymore, I'm feral?
:thumbsdown:
And to be on topic, in general I find it odd how men celebrate getting married by going to strippers. What goes through their head? "Oh, I'm going to vow to love and be loved by my wife for the rest of my life, I should go out and get blind drunk and pay for naked women beforehand"?
I used to work as a stripper for about a year as well and have performed at a lot of bucks nights. I found that the majority of the men fell into two categories - they either didn't want to be there, and felt really awkward and uncomfortable, or they transformed into disgusting pigs. I don't see why men would want to be in either category!
And the men who tell their partners that they don't find strippers attractive at all and that's why they should be allowed to go out - well, it's BS. Sooooooo many men treat you, as a stripper, differently in private than in front of their mates/partners. I started discovering that when I worked in retail selling baby clothes!
Milktini
02-02-2009, 17:00
I voted yes, If that is what he "wants" Though I would like him to be honest and let me know that, that was what he was going to be doing.
It depends.
I have been at parties were strippers came and they were very erm... up close and personal with the boys. Exposed vagina 2cms from their faces... bare vaginas rubbed on their chest ect... That I would not be comfortable with.:no: If it was just a girl taking her clothes off and dancing but keeping her distance from my partner I would be OK with it. But I would hope that he has enough respect for women to not want a stripper considering it is just encouraging women to be seen as nothing but meat.
the_original_duchess
02-02-2009, 17:06
it doesnt really bother me. hell i went on a stripper cruise not too long ago. its all in good fun and i honestly dont see the harm in it. i dont feel like he is disrespecting me by seeing it. altho he didnt want a stripper at his bucks night so i guess i shouldnt be answering but if he did i wouldnt care at all. :D
forbetoel
02-02-2009, 17:11
Would not (and did not) bother me in the slightest.
I wouldn't marry a man I didn't trust anyway.
sandy_1902
03-02-2009, 10:27
It depends.
I have been at parties were strippers came and they were very erm... up close and personal with the boys. Exposed vagina 2cms from their faces... bare vaginas rubbed on their chest ect... That I would not be comfortable with.:no: If it was just a girl taking her clothes off and dancing but keeping her distance from my partner I would be OK with it. But I would hope that he has enough respect for women to not want a stripper considering it is just encouraging women to be seen as nothing but meat.
I dont understand how guys can enjoy that,,, makes me gag a little.
I agree distance kept that fine.
Mathermy
03-02-2009, 10:42
I had to giggle about all these references to trust..I trust my husband is not a sexist pig and yes, if he were I would not have picked him for he wouldn't be the man for me!:laughing:
I am worth more than the expectation that my husband will on occasion spend our money on watching other naked strangers writhe and wiggle in front of him.
I dont understand how guys can enjoy that,,, makes me gag a little.
I agree distance kept that fine.
None of them did.
She asked about 15 guys before one eventually agreed to lay down for chest rubbing bit. The minute she got off him he went and sprayed his chest with pine o cleen. When she would do the splits and stuff in their face they would all lean back.
sandy_1902
04-02-2009, 13:30
None of them did.
She asked about 15 guys before one eventually agreed to lay down for chest rubbing bit. The minute she got off him he went and sprayed his chest with pine o cleen. When she would do the splits and stuff in their face they would all lean back.
lol.. fair enough
I wouldn't have a problem with it. It is usually for the enjoyment of the others there anyway, the buck usually ends up red faced! I was given a stripper on my hen's night, was just a bit of fun I thought!
It wouldnt bother me. Hes only looking... Now if there was touch involved...arh arh arhh :shame:
But he wouldnt, I know my man. :)
For what its worth, I was fine with my DH seeing a stripper on his bucks night.
DH hadn't been to a strip club before his brother's bucks night, 6 months before his own. I've been to more strip joints than he has! (I used to work in an adult shop and sell costumes and shoes to dancing girls so used to visit the clubs to see them and drum up business from time to time).
After the bucks night DH got home very sorry for himself the next day with a dark stain down his shirt. I asked if he'd been sick on himself and he said "no, its chocolate". I said "but you can't eat chocolate?" and he sheepishly said "it was on the stripper". I found out from a mate that they handcuffed him to the pole on stage and girls stripped then dribbled chocolate sauce on themselves and writhed all over him.
I wasn't angry - I thought it was hilarious.
That said, if DH was the kind of guy who wound up at the clubs a lot and was proud of his strip joint exploits rather than embarassed, I would probably not be so trusting and comfortable with it.
tyler's mum
08-02-2009, 18:42
Im single but if i was getting married i would like to think i would trust him. So i would'nt have a problemly with him seeing a stripper
A Party of Five
07-07-2009, 14:21
I would prefer he didn't :)
pennylane
07-07-2009, 16:13
yep I had a problem with it.He did too.We found out his Airforce mates were organising strippers for him and he said he didnt want it because they were bragging about how they were going to get him 'laid' etc and we both found it disrespectful since I had just given birth to our 2nd child and they were all coming to our wedding to watch us take vows.
We both dont get the whole 'celebrating your marriage by watching semi-naked/naked women' thing.
I copped alot of flack for standing up for what I believe in,DH didnt because they decided he couldnt possibly really feel that way and it must be me telling him what to do..*rolls eyes* (our wedding was almost 2 months ago and theyre STILL giving me a hard time) but..meh,If they cant see why we werent into it then I dont care about what they think anyway.
NO i wasnt okay with it.. but i had to put and shut up because my sisters got a male one for my hens night.
neither did i appreciate and actually my then DF didnt either.
Electric Rodeo
07-07-2009, 16:25
My DH had one for his bucks's night.
Had forgotten about it cause had to ask whether he had had one when I saw this thread, he'd told me originally but hadn't thought about it again.
Guess that means it didn't bother me:)
sockstealingpoltergeist
07-07-2009, 19:08
No i wouldn't be Ok with it.
It's not about trusting him, I do trust him, I trust him to allways be respectful of all women or I wouldn't have married him.
I would never be with someone who supported trading of the flesh. IMO the sex trade often uses and degrades women. Women are not just peices of meat. So no not OK ever.
I hold my husband in higher esteem then to believe he would treat other human beings that way.
I wouldnt be okay with it. Fortunately nor is my husband :cloud9:
mother of six
07-07-2009, 20:11
No my husband did not have a stripper and never has/would.
I dont understand why alot of people think the issue with having a stripper is TRUST.
My husband was really shocked to see how many voted yes. Each to there own but i dont see how anyone can find this entertainment. It goes against everything we beleive in.
pinkishbunny
07-07-2009, 20:16
It wouldn't of bothered me if he had one...not at all.. and if my friends had organised one for my hens night I wouldn't of mind either..
Beckybug
07-07-2009, 20:32
I wouldn't be, neither would DH, so we avoided that problem all together! We didn't have Bucks or Hen's nights. We stayed home and got drunk together!
ownerof2boys
08-07-2009, 11:26
I really dont have an issue with it either.... infact i encourage it. I'll be honest with you all i will not be doing any lap dance nor can i do a sexy one at that..... So he might as well get his fix from a woman who really has no interest in him at all :laughing:. Poor DP i would like to meet a stripper that would be interested in him at all.... and as said above he knows where the bread gets buttered and vegimited too.
happyluvy
08-07-2009, 11:34
My hubby went on a whole strip club crawl for his bucks. and i was totaly fine with it!
Its just a bit of fun! Its not as if he goes to a strip joint regularly or gets off on it or anything... its just a get together for the blokes on that night to have a laugh.
Oh and - I also had a male stripper at my hens. Which my man was totally fine with too!
:)
No my husband did not have a stripper and never has/would.
I dont understand why alot of people think the issue with having a stripper is TRUST.
My husband was really shocked to see how many voted yes. Each to there own but i dont see how anyone can find this entertainment. It goes against everything we beleive in.
I don't think my DF would have a stripper but how can you stop it if his friends organise it...and what is the problem with that anyway.
It might be against what you believe but other people just see it as a bit of fun...what's wrong with that?
I have been totally entertained by watching a female stripper with guy friends...I actually think it is funny, not sexy or a turn on or anything.
And I've been on wild boys afloat for hen's night....and it was fun!!!
No, I wouldn't be OK with it, but luckily my husband wouldn't ever drean of doing something so disrespectful.
I agree with this....
I hold my husband in higher esteem then to believe he would treat other human beings that way.
SuperGranny
08-07-2009, 12:02
hi, we didnt do any hens night, bucks night, sort of thing when we got married. We had a home cooked dinner with our best man and his wife, and that was about it. In our time together, 33 years, my hubby has gone to strip clubs while he has been away on trips with other work mates. It is not a big deal, he tells me the funny things that have happened, and he also tells me when he has had too much to drink. I think a marriage should be able to share everything with total honesty, and work on any problems when and if they come around. Secrets are the beginning of trouble. Marie.
I had one for my hens night and hubby had one for his bucks so no I don't have a problem with them.
I would never be with someone who supported trading of the flesh. IMO the sex trade often uses and degrades women. Women are not just peices of meat. So no not OK ever.
I hold my husband in higher esteem then to believe he would treat other human beings that way.
Women choose to be strippers. So do men.
I love JJJ
08-07-2009, 18:20
I wouldn't have worried if hubby had wanted to have strippers at his bucks night but there were 2 reasons why he didn't....
1. He didn't have a bucks night :laughing:
&
2. He would never have wanted a stripper anyway.
I would not have cared if he had, it's no different to looking at porn of which I also don't have a problem with.
I trust my husband and he can look at whomever he likes, as long as he comes home to me.
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