Coping with 2 under 2

[ButterflyMama]

What are your tips?

Bub is due anytime now and there will be 22 months between him/her and our DD..

What saved your sanity in the early months?
What did you find helped most?

Love to hear tips and advice :)

[Deserama]

Oh Gosh I wish I could help you but I really don't remember LOL my 2nd and 3rd were 18mths apart...I do remember it being somewhat difficult and that I really needed a break. I don't know...I just did it, pluse I had an almost 4 yr old as well. And I'm doing it again!!! ha ha...this one and my last one will be 21 mths apart, plus 4 others....and I'll cope because I'll have to I guess.

You just do...you have no choice...cope or go insane - you choose ;)

[monkeytoes]

My girls are 19 months apart. Things I found very useful were:

Putting bub in a sling so I still had 2 hands free for my toddler.

I often had bub in a rocker during the day and moved her around from room to room with me and DD1.

I am a person who likes routines, so once I got DD2 into a routine I made sure that the 2 kids had a sleep at the same time (lunchtime) which gave me time to cook dinner, clean up etc.

I bought a few cheap toys ($2 shop) that I wrapped up individually and once a week while I was BF bubs I would get DD1 to sit next to me on the couch and let her open her little gift.

Being sleep deprived was hard. Being up with your newborn all night, then chasing after a toddler all day. Very exhausting. But in those first few months I would go to bed around 8pm and get 2 hours sleep before bub woke for a feed at 10pm. I found that if I didn't have that 2 hrs sleep I would be feral the next day.

It is difficult for the first 6 months or so, but I found it got much easier once bubs could sit up and once she stopped waking for feeds at night.

Good luck

[Purplebird]

There will be almost exactly 2 years between DD and our new baby. The thing that is worrying me most is the time spent breastfeeding the new baby and how DD will cope with that. DD was a mega feeder - I mean a feed would take an hour and she would feed every 2 hours. If I have to do that again I think it will be so unfair on DD. My plan is to have a box of goodies which only come out at feeding time - special books, toys, puzzles whatever. My other plan is to learn to b'feed with bub in a sling and me walking around :laughing:

[kirstenriley]

My girls are 19 months apart. Things I found very useful were:

Putting bub in a sling so I still had 2 hands free for my toddler.

I often had bub in a rocker during the day and moved her around from room to room with me and DD1.

I am a person who likes routines, so once I got DD2 into a routine I made sure that the 2 kids had a sleep at the same time (lunchtime) which gave me time to cook dinner, clean up etc.

:thumbsup: that is exactly what i did too, the sling i HIGHLY recommend!! God i miss those 2 hour naps....lol

[possumsmum]

There is 18 months between my 2 boys. DS1 had a special toy box that he was only allowed to play with when I was feeding DS2. He use to get so excited! I would set him up with his water and a snack so I wouldnt have to get up. He also had a special DVD he was only allowed to watch when I was busy also.

I found it really difficult because I my DH broke his arm which required surgery when DS2 was 6 weeks old and he couldnt hold or pick up either for 3 months.

Lack of sleep is the hardest. With DS1 I would give him a 4-5am feed and then both go back to sleep but with DS2 he would have a feed around then and by the time I got him back to sleep DS1 was up.

Defintley take all the help you can get. If I had someone over helping I would get them to look after DS2 so I could have some quality time with DS1. I am also big on routines and worked DS2 into DS1 routine so they would sleep at the same time in the middle of the day.

If a day was really hard I just kept telling myself all I had to do was feed the boys and change their nappies - let the house and cooking go!

Good luck and dont worry too much - somehow it all works itself out :)

[Mum&bubs]

There's a 19 month gap between our two, so Summer was only 19 months old when Taliyah was born. It was tricky at first, sleep times were the worst then it just got easier.

Summer helped out with everything as much as she could, I tried to involve her in everything with the baby so she didn't get jealous.

[SAMum]

Mine were 22 months apart as well. Breastfeeding was probably the hardest part at first as DS1 wanted me to go and play with him and pick him up etc but it didn’t take long for him to understand when I was feeding DS2 that I couldn’t play, but I did often read to him while I fed which he loved, we would all sit together on the lounge, it was a very special time. Luckily DS2 was an express feeder, usually not more than 15 mins or so at a time!
I also think the sling has saved my sanity, a hugabub at first and now my fabulous ergo, DS2 still goes in that now when we go out and DS1 either walks holding my hand or goes in the trolley or pram. Tiredness was a major problem as it seemed I would just put DS2 back to sleep after his early morning feed and DS1 was up for the day, this is one time I really needed my DH to help and get up with DS1 for a couple of hours while I slept, unfortunately that has gone by the wayside now though :rolleyes:
I also encouraged DS1 to go in and see his brother as soon as he woke from a nap and to give him hugs and kisses before and after every nap, and made sure I spent some special time with him when DS2 had naps. They absolutely adore each other now, I went away recently just with DS2 and when I got back the boys were so excited to see each other they held hands and smiled at each other the whole way home from the airport.:goodvibes:

[branjie]

I have a two year age gap between my boys, and spent my whole second pregnancy worried about how I was going to cope, and what impact this baby was going to have on my 2yo. Anyway, I tried to have a rule that the TV was only on while I was feeding the baby. The second thing that was a life saver for me was that I bought a second hand electric baby swing for the new baby on eBay. Once I got him sleepy, I'd put him in there and he'd sleep for up to two hours, swinging to whole time! Whenever he stirred during this time, the swing would put him back to sleep. Don't know what I would have done without it.

I found it was good to keep up with playgroup and kindergym, so my older son wasn't stuck at home going stir crazy. We were sometimes late because baby needed feeding or whatever, but we managed.

It was hard, but it has definitely payed off. With a two year age gap, my boys have an absolute ball together. In the long run it's worked out really well. Good luck.

[Laksa]

my boys are 20 months apart (as you know, lol). i have to admit that Harper has watched far more tv in the last 9 weeks than i want him to! :o

i think it depends a lot on the personality of #2. Jarrah is pretty content to be on his playmat, swing or bassinette while i play games or do colouring etc with Harper.

i find bedtimes hard when DH is away, sometimes i end up sitting on H's bed, feeding J! fun fun...

just make the most of any times your DH is home to get a nap in. mine gets up and gives Harper brekkie while J and I stay in bed.

and just do the bare minimum of housework!!