What would you do if your new car was scratched by someone elses child ?

[Mumtotwokids]

What would you do if your new car was scratched by someone else's child ? Not on purpose, but an accident ? :no:

Here are the details - the car is new(less than a year old), the car is (stupidly) black, the scratch is deep and white, about 30cm long, and goes over two panels. The child is 4ish and was riding a bike past it, even after all of the children had been repeatedly asked to be careful of the car and not to ride their bikes past it. The car was parked at a holiday park (camping/caravans etc) the child's parents and us have a permanent holiday unit there so diplomacy is required.

Now my question is, what would you do ? Would you inform the parents, would you expect them to pay for the scratch ??? or would you take it on the chin because even your own children had on occasion ridden their bikes past ?

[missie_mack]

Probably take it on the chin. Accidents happen and all... I would probably let the parents know so your not hiding it from them or keeping secrets etc

Could one of those paint pens retouch the area or at least seal it so it doesnt get rust?

[munchie]

I would probably inform the parents in a non aggressive friendly way and then I would leave it in their hands (see if they offer to pay for the damage) and tbh I think it would be kind of rude to to just dismiss that. But then again all the kids were playing, it was an accident, Its a hard one but I personally would do as I just said. Goodluck

[PunkyDiva]

It's just a car and presumably you have insurance or can afford to get it fixed.
Something like that which is totally accidental is IMO not worth making a scene over, no matter how diplomatic you are, and risking a friendship. I'd just cop in on the chin, sooner or later would have happened in a shopping centre carpark or the like anyways.

[NewBeginnings]

I'm going to go against the grain and say I'd be expecting the child's parent to be paying for it :o

I'm a very car person... and to me touching someone else's car is a big no no and I always go out of my way to not allow DS near people's cars and I freak when he does go near them. He gets lecture after lecture about people's cars and touching them... and heaven forbid if he does! I'm not kidding I freak! :o

I know accidents still happen... but I put myself in the other person's shoes and I know I'd be pretty p!ssed if it happened to my car... especially if it were a black car... If my DS scratched someone's car I know I'd be paying them to get it fixed, I couldn't not... so to me I'd just expect the same in return...:yes:

[Teegzie]

I'd tell the parents of the kid who scratched it, but only so they could use it to backup their "don't ride near the car...ever!" discussion again with the kid.

I think it is a bit rude to expect someone to pay for it when it could have just as easily been your own child who scratched it. The kid needs to be told off (just as you would have done to your own kid if they had scratched it) but really accidents happen and you don't want to ruin a friendship over something that, as previously mentioned, could randomly happen in a carpark!

[RoarsomeMum]

I'd be hoping they at least offered to pay in part.. That is assuming you know FOR SURE what happened and who caused the damage.

Id Def be talking to them.

[Roopee]

It's just a car and presumably you have insurance or can afford to get it fixed.
Something like that which is totally accidental is IMO not worth making a scene over, no matter how diplomatic you are, and risking a friendship. I'd just cop in on the chin, sooner or later would have happened in a shopping centre carpark or the like anyways.
I agree wholeheartedly with this.

Our Car is a deep burgundy colour and after we'd had it less than a month a friends child was riding his scooter around and forgot where the brakes were. He ploughed straight into the back of it and left a big dent and a scratch. It's still there.
It's just a car and not worth ruining a friendship over.:flowerz:

[Silvana]

I'm going to go against the grain and say I'd be expecting the child's parent to be paying for it :o

I'm a very car person... and to me touching someone else's car is a big no no and I always go out of my way to not allow DS near people's cars and I freak when he does go near them. He gets lecture after lecture about people's cars and touching them... and heaven forbid if he does! I'm not kidding I freak! :o

I know accidents still happen... but I put myself in the other person's shoes and I know I'd be pretty p!ssed if it happened to my car... especially if it were a black car... If my DS scratched someone's car I know I'd be paying them to get it fixed, I couldn't not... so to me I'd just expect the same in return...:yes:

:iagree:. The excuse of "it was just an accident" doesn't sit well with me because most incidents on the road are just accidents and that is why we insure our cars - to protect against accidents. But a 4 year old can be taught to respect other peoples property and if that child had been told repeatedly not to go near the car, then the parents should hold some responsibility.

If my child did that I would pay, we should teach our kids from an early age that we should own up to our own responsibilities.

[ladybugblue84]

Who was responsible for watching these children at the time? If the parents were not actually around to watch the children but left them in your care then I would say it was your responsibility to ensure the children didn't scratch your car. How can the parents be responsible for something that they couldn't control?

[rynosmum]

Because it's a black car, you're probably going to need both panels resprayed so it's not going to be a cheap repair. If you are insured though and they offer to pay, perhaps you could get them to pay the excess.

I think if it was just their kids riding there then you could ask them to pay for the repair but because all of the kids were doing it, well it could have just as easily been one of yours had circumstances been different so I think that makes it difficult.

I hope it works out for you - what a difficult situation.:hugs:

[oipic]

Personally, I'd probably quietly stew over it for a while and have a whinge to DP about it and then harden up and pay for it myself.

The car was parked in a public area where it's obvious kids would be playing; and I'm assuming that if he was only 4 he's probably staying close to his parents unit so it's not like when he was told to steer clear of the car that he could go 100 metres down the road.

[pinkgingham]

i would speak to the parents about them keeping a better eye on their kids and teaching them how to respect other peoples property. i would expect them to offer to pay some of the repairs because as a PP said, you are most likely going to need both panels resprayed and it wont be cheap. even if you are insured, there might be other issues with excess' etc. i would be very angry at the parents mainly.

[Mama2Mia]

yes agreed accidents happen all the time but i would be very annoyed if that was my car :(

if its only a year old i'm assuming they would've spent a few decent thousands on it and to have it scratched like that through no fault of their own is a little unfair.

if that was my child who scratched their car i would not feel right not insisting i pay for the repairs and when i say insist i mean insist because we all know its the polite and friendly thing to say "ah no thats ok, it was an accident don't worry about it" when really you're fuming inside :banghead: .......... so i guess i would expect others to feel the same...

but thats me!

[Pina Colada]

Who was responsible for watching these children at the time? If the parents were not actually around to watch the children but left them in your care then I would say it was your responsibility to ensure the children didn't scratch your car. How can the parents be responsible for something that they couldn't control?

:iagree: If you were the supervising adult, and it was a 4 year old boy, the parents are not responsible for his actions IMO.

Either way, I would take it on the chin, and move on.

[NibbleCurlynBub]

Probably bring it up in conversation.. and hope that they offer to pay for a little part of the repair. :o

[Grace3]

I'm going to go against the grain and say I'd be expecting the child's parent to be paying for it :o

I'm a very car person... and to me touching someone else's car is a big no no and I always go out of my way to not allow DS near people's cars and I freak when he does go near them. He gets lecture after lecture about people's cars and touching them... and heaven forbid if he does! I'm not kidding I freak! :o

I know accidents still happen... but I put myself in the other person's shoes and I know I'd be pretty p!ssed if it happened to my car... especially if it were a black car... If my DS scratched someone's car I know I'd be paying them to get it fixed, I couldn't not... so to me I'd just expect the same in return...:yes:

:iagree:


:iagree:. The excuse of "it was just an accident" doesn't sit well with me because most incidents on the road are just accidents and that is why we insure our cars - to protect against accidents. But a 4 year old can be taught to respect other peoples property and if that child had been told repeatedly not to go near the car, then the parents should hold some responsibility.

If my child did that I would pay, we should teach our kids from an early age that we should own up to our own responsibilities.

:iagree:

[BecNBub]

i would be FUMING.... yes kids are kids, but thats just completely wrong in my book.

I would be DEFINITELY talking to these other parents about how they are going to sort this out. Whether they pay cash or u go thru ur insurance.

Why should you have to pay out the excess for damage that wasnt caused by urself or ur own children.

Sorry but parents need to learn to control/keep an eye on/discipline their children. I know if i had've done that to someone's car as a kid i would not have been able to sit down for days! my bum would've been smacked so hard.

I would rather loose these people as "friends" and have my child/ren growing up with respect for other ppl/property than keep them as friends and have that families "bad habits" corrupt my child/ren.

If the parents dont offer to pay you can lodge the insurance claim and give them their details and the insurance company can also investigate them to pay the excess.

[Grace3]

i would be FUMING.... yes kids are kids, but thats just completely wrong in my book.

I would be DEFINITELY talking to these other parents about how they are going to sort this out. Whether they pay cash or u go thru ur insurance.

Why should you have to pay out the excess for damage that wasnt caused by urself or ur own children.

Sorry but parents need to learn to control/keep an eye on/discipline their children. I know if i had've done that to someone's car as a kid i would not have been able to sit down for days! my bum would've been smacked so hard.

I would rather loose these people as "friends" and have my child/ren growing up with respect for other ppl/property than keep them as friends and have that families "bad habits" corrupt my child/ren.

If the parents dont offer to pay you can lodge the insurance claim and give them their details and the insurance company can also investigate them to pay the excess.

:iagree:

[pinkgingham]

like i said in my PP as did others, what ever happened to people teaching their kids to respect other peoples property?

[3blue&1pink]

How can you prove that it wasent one of your kids who done it? Did anyone actually see it happen?

[tootiredtosleep]

I'd probably just leave it. I'm not really into cars though.
If I was and kids were riding near it, well I probably would have moved the car in the first place.

[MothersMilk]

I would hope that the parents at least offer to pay :yes:
If it was my kid that scratched the car (accident or not) i would pay.
I would expect my child to have respect for other peoples property so if they did that i would consider myself at fault - it is my job to teach my kid to be careful around other peoples stuff etc.

[Roopee]

i would be FUMING.... yes kids are kids, but thats just completely wrong in my book.

I would be DEFINITELY talking to these other parents about how they are going to sort this out. Whether they pay cash or u go thru ur insurance.

Why should you have to pay out the excess for damage that wasnt caused by urself or ur own children.

Sorry but parents need to learn to control/keep an eye on/discipline their children. I know if i had've done that to someone's car as a kid i would not have been able to sit down for days! my bum would've been smacked so hard.

I would rather loose these people as "friends" and have my child/ren growing up with respect for other ppl/property than keep them as friends and have that families "bad habits" corrupt my child/ren.

If the parents dont offer to pay you can lodge the insurance claim and give them their details and the insurance company can also investigate them to pay the excess.
Wow! Yeah...ummm...gee. That seems a bit much to me but each to their own I guess.
How do we know that the child had not been left in the OP's care? If they were do you still think the parents are liable for the cost?


like i said in my PP as did others, what ever happened to people teaching their kids to respect other peoples property?
The child is onlyu 4 and as the OP said- her children were also riding past the car on their bikes. If that child see's those kids doing it then he/she probably thought it was ok.
4 year old children are also sometimes prone to 'forgetting' the 'rules'. They're just children when it comes down to it.

[NewBeginnings]

like i said in my PP as did others, what ever happened to people teaching their kids to respect other peoples property?

:iagree: it's not just the issue over it being a car and therefore expensive... it's the fact that it is someone else's property... whether it was a car or something little like a photo frame... IMO it's about the respect for other people's property.

[HunterzMummy]

I am baffeled that so many are saying leave it :confused: IMO if they were any kind of friend they would insist on paying...so with the argument of save the friendship, if your child damaged someone elses car would you just say meh kids will be kids??? Honestly..they damaged a BRAND NEW car but ohhh well you pay for it, its ur car :confused: See its crazy no person with any desency would say that.

But with that..where were the parents? And did you see the child actually do it? You see i would have taken the child and the bike straight to the parents and show them...cuz proloning it wont work in your favour.

Good luck with it all... But TBH you want to be diplomatic of cause but its in there hands how they deal with it , so dont worry about how they are goign to react as long as you are nice about it

[Fuchsia!]

where was your car parked?

If it was parked in your garage or on your property then i would confront the parents and hope that they would help pay, but if your car was parked where they usually ride their bikes then IMO its your fault.

Kids make mistakes, kids have accidents, you probably should have moved your car away so they didn't have the chance to wreck it.

If the kid done it maliciously then i would be ****ed but if it was an accident then **** happens.

IMO you are at fault for not taking control of the situation. If i didn't want my car scratched (and lets face it, with kids riding around its going to happen) i would have put my car away safely or i would have MADE them move away from teh car, not just telling them, i would have shoo'ed them away, and i would have taken action to make sure it didn't happen.

[NibbleCurlynBub]

I must admit though that if they didn't offer to help, I would probably silently be mad for a very long time and probably just stay away. :o

Otherwise.. I agree with Jaxcoop. The kids needed to be properly shoo'ed away from the car.

[Pina Colada]

Wow! Some of these responses I find so over the top.

We don't even know yet if the child was under the supervision of his own parents. If the parents are not even there, they can not be at all responsible for their 4 year old child's actions! He is a 4 year old child playing with the OP's children and he had an accident on his bike (which could have easily been one of her own children). Some of you are acting like he is a little out of control hoodlum intentionly causing damage to other people's property!

The children of the OP were also riding around the car and not following the rules, so I guess you are all classifying her children with the same lack of respect for property that you are so eager to classify this other poor little boy.

[Fuchsia!]

Everyone keeps ranting about respecting peoples property...Does anyone realise that we are talking about a 4yr old that ACCIDENTLY scratched the car? A 4yr old?

Was the 4yr old suppose to go and get a job to pay for it?

[pinkgingham]

I'd probably just leave it. I'm not really into cars though.
If I was and kids were riding near it, well I probably would have moved the car in the first place.

when you are staying in those types of places you get allocated parking, probably not a lot of other places to park the car.

Wow! Yeah...ummm...gee. That seems a bit much to me but each to their own I guess.
How do we know that the child had not been left in the OP's care? If they were do you still think the parents are liable for the cost?


The child is onlyu 4 and as the OP said- her children were also riding past the car on their bikes. If that child see's those kids doing it then he/she probably thought it was ok.
4 year old children are also sometimes prone to 'forgetting' the 'rules'. They're just children when it comes down to it.

then the parents should of been supervising, after all the child is 4. what kind of parent would allow their 4 year old to walk around a holiday park unsupervised. we go to one often and i know i wouldnt let my 3 yr old walk around on his own. not only are their many strangers around, but there are also cars driving around too. what if he got hit...

since they werent watching their 4 yr old like any good parent would then they should pay as it would be rude to not even insist to make ammends in some form.

[Roopee]

Everyone keeps ranting about respecting peoples property...Does anyone realise that we are talking about a 4yr old that ACCIDENTLY scratched the car? A 4yr old?

Was the 4yr old suppose to go and get a job to pay for it?

:iagree::smiliedance:

[Issey]

i wouldn't expect the parents to pay. i would feel awful if i was the parent and approached for payment and probably wouldn't respond very well. i am sure you would have already said something to the child if you saw it happen :confused:

you were supervising and your car was in a public place.

what about the hundreds of cars which get scratched in car parks and no-one own up to it

just use a pen and touch it up or make an insurance claim

[HunterzMummy]

(which could have easily been one of her own children)

And if it were my child who cause damage I would pay no doubt about it.

Regardless of accident or not, parents are responsiable for there own children. If they damage somethign at school or a shopping centre you are expected to pay for it right? so why not in the case? im not saying go over accusing but be nice and gentel cause after all it was an accident.

I can not fathom my child causing damage and me not paying for it. I would NEVER expect someone else to pay for something MY child damaged.

He is not a hooligan it was an accident and yes accidents happen but it was an accident by someone elses child and there for the owners of the property should not expect to foot the bill...

That is what i can not comprehend. If your little one accidently scratched someones car would you expect to not pay... Of cause it was an accident BUT they should not foot the bill for YOUR childs accident :confused:

[Pina Colada]

then the parents should of been supervising, after all the child is 4. what kind of parent would allow their 4 year old to walk around a holiday park unsupervised. we go to one often and i know i wouldnt let my 3 yr old walk around on his own. not only are their many strangers around, but there are also cars driving around too. what if he got hit...

since they werent watching their 4 yr old like any good parent would then they should pay as it would be rude to not even insist to make ammends in some form.

Wow, I don't like to use this emoticon, but here it is :rolleyes:

It sounds like this boy is friends with OP's children, and she is friends with the parents. We don't know what circumstances the boy was there under - supervised by his own parents, or supervised by the OP. But, it is fairly clear that he was there to play with the children. Not just randomly wandering the park.

[Roopee]

when you are staying in those types of places you get allocated parking, probably not a lot of other places to park the car.


then the parents should of been supervising, after all the child is 4. what kind of parent would allow their 4 year old to walk around a holiday park unsupervised. we go to one often and i know i wouldnt let my 3 yr old walk around on his own. not only are their many strangers around, but there are also cars driving around too. what if he got hit...

since they werent watching their 4 yr old like any good parent would then they should pay as it would be rude to not even insist to make ammends in some form.

But how do you know he wasnt being supervised? I mean he was playing with her children who werent 'wandering around on his own'- they have permanent Onsite vans or whatever so this boy knows these people.
have you read the OP?
Your post is so very judgmental.
We recently spent 2 weeks at a caravan park where our van is parked all year and this kind of parent allowed her 3 yr old to go to her friends place one street away.
I walked her there and she stayed and played for an hour until I went to pick her up.
My 8 yr old and 6 yr old were given free reign while we were their with very little boundaries placed on them.
I am not a bad parent for doing so as you seem to think I am.
I'm actually really offended at your post.

[NewBeginnings]

Everyone keeps ranting about respecting peoples property...Does anyone realise that we are talking about a 4yr old that ACCIDENTLY scratched the car? A 4yr old?

Was the 4yr old suppose to go and get a job to pay for it?


No he's not.... but the parents of the 4 year old are accountable for his actions.

Yes, we all know he is a 4 year old... and they can all have accidents... but as their parents IMO it is their duty to help prevent them, or to pay for the results of them.

It's the same in a shop... you break something, you pay for it... it should be the same elsewhere.

If it were one of the OP's children who did the scratch, well then their parents would be paying for it to get fixed too ;)

Yeah there are a lot of what if's in this situation... could the car have been moved, who was watching the children... But to me it's a straight out, shoe on the other foot kind of thing. I couldn't imagine not paying to get it fixed... and to me... well I don't see how others wouldn't feel the same!

[Fuchsia!]

No he's not.... but the parents of the 4 year old are accountable for his actions.

Yes, we all know he is a 4 year old... and they can all have accidents... but as their parents IMO it is their duty to help prevent them, or to pay for the results of them.

It's the same in a shop... you break something, you pay for it... it should be the same elsewhere.

If it were one of the OP's children who did the scratch, well then their parents would be paying for it to get fixed too ;)

Yeah there are a lot of what if's in this situation... could the car have been moved, who was watching the children... But to me it's a straight out, shoe on the other foot kind of thing. I couldn't imagine not paying to get it fixed... and to me... well I don't see how others wouldn't feel the same!

But the parents don't know? How are they suppose to pay for it when they don't even know what happened?

And if i were in a shop and there was something in the road that was a hazard and i trip and broke it, then no i wouldn't pay.

[Pina Colada]

And if it were my child who cause damage I would pay no doubt about it.

Regardless of accident or not, parents are responsiable for there own children. If they damage somethign at school or a shopping centre you are expected to pay for it right? so why not in the case? im not saying go over accusing but be nice and gentel cause after all it was an accident.

I can not fathom my child causing damage and me not paying for it. I would NEVER expect someone else to pay for something MY child damaged.

He is not a hooligan it was an accident and yes accidents happen but it was an accident by someone elses child and there for the owners of the property should not expect to foot the bill...

That is what i can not comprehend. If your little one accidently scratched someones car would you expect to not pay... Of cause it was an accident BUT they should not foot the bill for YOUR childs accident :confused:

Some people are getting a bit confused clearly. The OP clearly asked whether I would approach the parents of the children in her situation. No, I would not. I would let it ride, take it on the chin, etc.etc. ESPECIALLY if I were supervising the children. No question about that - If I were in a responsible capacity watching ALL of the children (of the age of 4 - let's not forget that) than I take responsiblity for their safety and for their actions.

I never said I wouldn't pay if the situation was reversed, so I'm not sure where your other comments are coming from. If I was approached, I would offer to pay.

And no, the little boy isn't a hooligan - but by the tone and the content of some of the responses, are so over the top imo.

[Sheer Bliss]

Everyone keeps ranting about respecting peoples property...Does anyone realise that we are talking about a 4yr old that ACCIDENTLY scratched the car? A 4yr old?

Was the 4yr old suppose to go and get a job to pay for it?

:laughing: :yelclap: :yes: Soooo true!! It was an ACCIDENT! and the child is 4!!




then the parents should of been supervising, after all the child is 4. what kind of parent would allow their 4 year old to walk around a holiday park unsupervised. we go to one often and i know i wouldnt let my 3 yr old walk around on his own. not only are their many strangers around, but there are also cars driving around too. what if he got hit...

since they werent watching their 4 yr old like any good parent would then they should pay as it would be rude to not even insist to make ammends in some form.

Ummmm....jumping to conclusions....we don't know WHO was in charge of the kid at the time and what the circumstances were. Why are people on here SOOOO judgemental all the time? Does it make you a better person if you can critisise another?

To the OP....i'd probably let them know it happened, and that the kids had ALL been told not to ride past there, but they ALL were doing it anyway. It could just as easily have been one of your kids who had the accident and did it. If they offered to pay for it once it had been mentioned, i'd say no, as it WAS an accident and all the kids were doing the wrong thing. The main reason it hink the parents whould know, is because they all repeatedly did something they were asked not to, and they should know that.

[missie_mack]

Its not like the parents are refusing to pay or anything :no: Its a matter of do you ask them to or not... I simply wouldn't ask however that doesn't mean if my son did the damage that I wouldn't pay :confused: Nor does the fact I wouldn't ask mean that I am not a car proud person :confused:

TBH it sounds like the child was playing with her kids at her site and thats the reason why I wouldn't ask. Same as I would never ask for a guest to replace something in my home if they damaged it by accident.

If you want to teach the child about respect it doesn't have to come out of their parents hip pocket. Plenty of other ways to do it like helping you out which a job or something to repay the debt.

[pinkgingham]

i am just having my opinion just like anyone else.

ok speaking of only myself so no one can get offended.....firstly, i wouldnt allow any of my kids under the age of 10 to roam a caravan park on their own. i would feel like an irresponsible parent if i were to do that. i would expect others not to let their 4 yr old to wander around as i wouldnt do it myself. there are bad people everywhere and caravans parks are not exempt.

secondly if my kid scratched someone else car then 1. it would be my fault for not watching them, 2. my fault for not teaching them better and 3. i would feel obligated to make some kind of financial offer to them to help fix their car.

[BecNBub]

its interesting to read many comments in this thread... so far there's quite a number of mothers here who wouldnt pay to rectify the damages caused by their child.

Very interesting indeed.....

and for the person who said " should the 4y/o go and get a job"..... obviously no! the PARENTS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR CHILDS ACTIONS!!!

regardless of where the car was parked-it is still that child/rens parents to make sure their child/ren does not go anywhere near that car.. or anyone else's car or personal belongings for that matter.

And yes i do believe this instance is different to a car being damaged in a car park, if u saw that child (whether it be deliberately or accidently) run the bike into the car, then yes u absolutely have a right to get his/her parents to pay to fix the damaged caused. But possibly a little bit different (unless this child has been seen causing havoc around the car previously etc) if no-one actually saw the child run into the car.

[Refresh]

Some people are getting a bit confused clearly. The OP clearly asked whether I would approach the parents of the children in her situation. No, I would not. I would let it ride, take it on the chin, etc.etc. ESPECIALLY if I were supervising the children. No question about that - If I were in a responsible capacity watching ALL of the children (of the age of 4 - let's not forget that) than I take responsiblity for their safety and for their actions.

I never said I wouldn't pay if the situation was reversed, so I'm not sure where your other comments are coming from. If I was approached, I would offer to pay.

And no, the little boy isn't a hooligan - but by the tone and the content of some of the responses, are so over the top imo.

I agree:yes::yes::yes::yes:

It sounds like the OP was supervising the child and the parents dont even know and if that is the case then I think it would not be appropriate to approach the parents, unless the child did it on purpose or was being particularly contrary or malicious.....it's a CAR :rolleyes: Accidents happen.

Like anyone of us, if the parents knew, they would probably offer to pay....let's give them that benefit of the doubt....

[Roopee]

its interesting to read many comments in this thread... so far there's quite a number of mothers here who wouldnt pay to rectify the damages caused by their child.

Very interesting indeed.....



Could you point me in the direction of those replies? I haven't been able to see anyone in here say that they wouldn't pay for any damages their children caused?

[NibbleCurlynBub]

I think the deciding factor here could easily be who was supposed to be supervising.

Was the child just let out and riding around your car without the other parents talking to you first, or was he in your care, more or less.

[missie_mack]

its interesting to read many comments in this thread... so far there's quite a number of mothers here who wouldnt pay to rectify the damages caused by their child.

Where has any parent said they wouldn't pay if it was their child :confused: :confused: :confused:

[Pina Colada]

its interesting to read many comments in this thread... so far there's quite a number of mothers here who wouldnt pay to rectify the damages caused by their child.

Very interesting indeed.....



I don't have time to re-read all the posts right now, but correct me if I am wrong, there is quite a number of mothers here who said they would not say anything to the parents of the child (which, I might point out, was the question asked by the OP).

I can't recall too many that said that they wouldn't pay if it were their child.....in fact, I can't recall any, could you please point them out for me.

[Refresh]

its interesting to read many comments in this thread... so far there's quite a number of mothers here who wouldnt pay to rectify the damages caused by their child.

Very interesting indeed.....

I think you are just hearing what you want to hear .....

[Fuchsia!]

its interesting to read many comments in this thread... so far there's quite a number of mothers here who wouldnt pay to rectify the damages caused by their child.

Very interesting indeed.....

and for the person who said " should the 4y/o go and get a job"..... obviously no! the PARENTS ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THEIR CHILDS ACTIONS!!!

regardless of where the car was parked-it is still that child/rens parents to make sure their child/ren does not go anywhere near that car.. or anyone else's car or personal belongings for that matter.

And yes i do believe this instance is different to a car being damaged in a car park, if u saw that child (whether it be deliberately or accidently) run the bike into the car, then yes u absolutely have a right to get his/her parents to pay to fix the damaged caused. But possibly a little bit different (unless this child has been seen causing havoc around the car previously etc) if no-one actually saw the child run into the car.
I don't remember anyone saying that they wouldn't pay for it ???

Maybe it might have been best if the mother drew a circle on a spot where nothing can get wrecked in case her 4yr old accidently done some damage.

And maybe the OP shouldn't have had them playing around her car?

[BecNBub]

I think you are just hearing what you want to hear .....


no im reading the posts....

there's been a few posts in here about "i would just not say anything and let it go", or "i would just get it fixed (by paying the excess) myself.

If my child has been seen to do something wrong/cause damage i wouldnt hesitate to rectify the problem...mind u i know my child will NEVER be dis-respectful, nor unsupervised. So thankfully i wont be in this situation.

I feel sorry for the poor family who now have a damaged brand new car.

[Me]

I'd be mentioning it in passing to the child's parents, not expecting them to pay, but just mentioning it so that they can talk to the child to ensure it doesn't happen again.

As for fixing the damage, if the parents offered, I'd be more than grateful, but as I mentioned above, I wouldn't expect it. I'd probably consult a panel beater about how to best tackle the problem - you may be able to get away with touch up paint for the time being(ie if you can't afford to fix it immediately) as this will help protect the surface under from potential rust problems.

[Fuchsia!]

no im reading the posts....

there's been a few posts in here about "i would just not say anything and let it go", or "i would just get it fixed (by paying the excess) myself.

If my child has been seen to do something wrong/cause damage i wouldnt hesitate to rectify the problem...mind u i know my child will NEVER be dis-respectful, nor unsupervised. So thankfully i wont be in this situation.

I feel sorry for the poor family who now have a damaged brand new car.

Again, no one has said they wouldn't pay for it.

The parents of the child who scratched the car has not even been asked yet, they haven't even had the chance to offer to pay for it.

If it happened to me i wouldn't allow the parents to pay for it cause it would have been my own stupid fault for leaving the car there in the 1st place, it would have been my own stupid fault for letting them ride near my car, it would be my own stupid fault for not supervising the children properly.

It was an accident of a 4yr old. As an adult i should have known better that a 4yr old can be clumsy and there is a high chance that she would have landed on my car.

Pretty siimple really.

[Areca]

Well considering it was an accident I'd pay for it myself.

[Jakois]

no im reading the posts....

there's been a few posts in here about "i would just not say anything and let it go", or "i would just get it fixed (by paying the excess) myself.

If my child has been seen to do something wrong/cause damage i wouldnt hesitate to rectify the problem...mind u i know my child will NEVER be dis-respectful, nor unsupervised. So thankfully i wont be in this situation.

I feel sorry for the poor family who now have a damaged brand new car.

Not one single PP has said that THEY WOULDN'T pay for the repair.

They have simply said that THEY would let it slide.

Can you not destinguish the difference between the two?

The OP has not even informed the childs parent's yet:rolleyes:.

As for you never being in that situation, it could be as simple as your child opening a car door in a car park. If the cars are too close together, whamo, there is damage.

[Fuchsia!]

As for you never being in that situation, it could be as simple as your child opening a car door in a car park. If the cars are too close together, whamo, there is damage.

very good point, even a supervised and respectful child can have an accident

[Pina Colada]

To the OP, no I would not approach the child's parents. Good luck! I hope you have your nice shiny car back soon, whichever way you decide to go about it :fingerscrossed:

[Areca]

mind u i know my child will NEVER be dis-respectful, nor unsupervised. So thankfully i wont be in this situation.



Sorry, I had a little giggle at that one! It's cute. I wouldn't go sprouting that off too many times....it'll come back to bite ya!

Oh, and from the OP I gathered that she was looking after the kids....therefore they were being supervised.

Accidents happen.

FTR before anyone reads in to my posts. If it was my child and I was approached I'd offer to pay the damages. Hopefully that's clear enough for those who like to read between the lines!

[pinkgingham]

again, as the car is in a caravan/holiday park....more than likely there was no where else to park the car.

as for anything else, agree to disagree.

[Fuchsia!]

again, as the car is in a caravan/holiday park....more than likely there was no where else to park the car.

as for anything else, agree to disagree.

Theres plenty of places to park a car, park it out the front of the caravan park, park it up further. I have done this before, i don't particulary want my car scratched so i parked it well away and parked it out on the road. Its common sense really

[Roopee]

Theres plenty of places to park a car, park it out the front of the caravan park, park it up further. I have done this before, i don't particulary want my car scratched so i parked it well away and parked it out on the road. Its common sense really
:iagree:

Or you could simply have a no bikes at all anywhere near the car rule? Gosh there are many way you could try to get around it but it was an accident and accidents happen.

[pinkgingham]

Theres plenty of places to park a car, park it out the front of the caravan park, park it up further. I have done this before, i don't particulary want my car scratched so i parked it well away and parked it out on the road. Its common sense really

well i have been to numerous caravan parks in NSW and QLD and there is only ever parking next to the van and the nearest road outside of the park is miles away. why should she have to move her car anyways?



and shame on those that would send rude PMs. how sad and pathetic. :rolleyes:

[Refresh]

no im reading the posts....

there's been a few posts in here about "i would just not say anything and let it go", or "i would just get it fixed (by paying the excess) myself.

If my child has been seen to do something wrong/cause damage i wouldnt hesitate to rectify the problem...mind u i know my child will NEVER be dis-respectful, nor unsupervised. So thankfully i wont be in this situation.

I feel sorry for the poor family who now have a damaged brand new car.

Nearly everyone in the thread has said that if the situation was reversed they would offer to pay......and the family in question would probably
do the same given the chance. :confused:

If it were my child I would want to know so that we could discuss it and he could apologise etc.....that's a normal reaction for a parent, not exclusive to yourself.

We would all like to think that our kids are perfect and that we are perfect parents.... Come back and read what your wrote in a few years time ;) I truly hope that your children never once make a mistake or lose themselves for a moment and be disrespectful :goodvibes:

[Sheer Bliss]

...mind u i know my child will NEVER be dis-respectful, nor unsupervised. So thankfully i wont be in this situation.

I'm sorry - but WHAT?? :laughing:


Sorry, I had a little giggle at that one! It's cute. I wouldn't go sprouting that off too many times....it'll come back to bite ya!

Took the words right out of my mouth DA!!

[Silvana]

I love the "accidents happen" excuse. Isn't most of what happens on our roads, accidents? When someone hits you from behind, is that not an accident? It is very rare for someone to actually intend to hit someone else, so in essence most incidents are actually accidents. Does this mean that people escape liability because it was an accident? Why should it be any different in this situation and why should the owner have to cover the expense when it wasn't the owner's fault?

I have already stated this in this thread, I am well aware, but it seems that it needs to be pointed out again.

[Pina Colada]

I love the "accidents happen" excuse. Isn't most of what happens on our roads, accidents? When someone hits you from behind, is that not an accident? It is very rare for someone to actually intend to hit someone else, so in essence most incidents are actually accidents. Does this mean that people escape liability because it was an accident? Why should it be any different in this situation and why should the owner have to cover the expense when it wasn't the owner's fault?

I have already stated this in this thread, I am well aware, but it seems that it needs to be pointed out again.

Because drivers on a road are adults, all educated on road rules and duly licensed (hopefully), and driving with the knowledge that they are responsible for their own actions and safety and that of others in their car and on the road.

A 4 year old child under somebody's supervision is not responsible for their own actions and safety. That is the responsiblity of the supervising adult :yes: Be that their own parents or another child's parents knowingly taking that child into their supervision. They are a 4 year old child for pete's sake.

Besides, I don't think many (if any) people are saying that the parent's of the child shouldn't be liable anyway (should they have been present)??? Aren't people saying that they just wouldn't make a big deal of it, and not mention it to the parents??? I don't think anybody is actually arguing liability? Just that they would choose not to make an issue of it. Why is that so hard to understand - are people misinterpreting what myself and others are saying?

I WOULD NOT approach the parents of the child.

I WOULD pay for any damage my child had inflicted on somebody else's property.

If the child's parents were present, I DO NOT argue the issue of liablity - simply that I would chose not to act on it.

Why is that such an issue???

[grass is always greener]

I had something similar happen to me last night.
My nephew (9), lil brother (10) and DS1 (3) were all playing out the front. Well nephew had DFs electric guitar on and walked past my car numerous time and the inevitable (sp) happened, he hit my car.
I seen him do it, i seen the mark he left, i can still see the mark he left. He denied doing it and said that the mark was already there (trust me it wasnt) but we decided not to say anything to SIL (nephews mum) as its only little and we are replacing the front bar soon.
I think you should just bring it up in friendly conversation, dont come across too harsh, and just see what they do.

[Angelmist♥]

i wouldn't expect the parents to pay. i would feel awful if i was the parent and approached for payment and probably wouldn't respond very well. i am sure you would have already said something to the child if you saw it happen :confused:

you were supervising and your car was in a public place.

what about the hundreds of cars which get scratched in car parks and no-one own up to it

just use a pen and touch it up or make an insurance claim

I was thinking the same thing. How many cars per day are scratched/run into at shopping centres?

The kid is 4, it was an accident. I'd probably just cop it on the chin OR maybe mention how much the excess will be with your insurance provider to the parents.


Nearly everyone in the thread has said that if the situation was reversed they would offer to pay......and the family in question would probably
do the same given the chance. :confused:

If it were my child I would want to know so that we could discuss it and he could apologise etc.....that's a normal reaction for a parent, not exclusive to yourself.

We would all like to think that our kids are perfect and that we are perfect parents.... Come back and read what your wrote in a few years time ;) I truly hope that your children never once make a mistake or lose themselves for a moment and be disrespectful :goodvibes:

:laughing:Absolutely!

[canberramomma]

OK, I haven't read all the posts, but I probably wouldn't have noticed anyway and if i did, well, cars get scratched, glass gets broken and jumpers get lost - I'd cop it on the chin as one of life's little incidents.

It was a little child who didn't mean to scratch it, not a thug causing intentional damage IMO.

[Mum&bubs]

I'd pay for it myself. If I knew my car was parked where kids were riding bikes, I'd move my car. A 4yr old is bound to have accidents. I wouldn't be happy with the parents though.

My car has been scratched by little kids before, and even though parents are responsible for their kids actions, I'm responsible for my car so I know now not to leave it around where it could get hit accidently.

[godders]

i would be FUMING.... yes kids are kids, but thats just completely wrong in my book.

I would be DEFINITELY talking to these other parents about how they are going to sort this out. Whether they pay cash or u go thru ur insurance.

Why should you have to pay out the excess for damage that wasnt caused by urself or ur own children.

Sorry but parents need to learn to control/keep an eye on/discipline their children. I know if i had've done that to someone's car as a kid i would not have been able to sit down for days! my bum would've been smacked so hard.

I would rather loose these people as "friends" and have my child/ren growing up with respect for other ppl/property than keep them as friends and have that families "bad habits" corrupt my child/ren.

If the parents dont offer to pay you can lodge the insurance claim and give them their details and the insurance company can also investigate them to pay the excess.

I'd take this stance too...sure, friends are good to have but it's about bringing the child up with respect & the ability to look after their own things, toys/furniture and the like.

That said, if i knew kids were playing, i'd move it the best i could out of their way...then of course it could get broken into or something but i guess taht another thread :)

[SorenLorensen]

i once had a little boy (also about 4) who rode past my car and knocked off my side mirror.
he was so upset and ran home before anyone could check if he was ok.
we went and spoke to his mum and informed her why he was upset and wanted to assure him that we knew it was an accident and that these things happen and that he was not in trouble.
his mum was not ummm....well she had no money, she still offered to pay and i just told her not to worry since it was an accident......no harm no foul.

personally i also saw it that i knew he was riding his bike up and down and i know kids can be unstable on bikes. i probably should not have had it in a position that he was able to ride past it.

[Deserama]

Wouldn't concern me...it's just a car, that will be scratched many times over by the time you're finished with it!

I've never understood people's obsessions with cars and scratches. If you don't want to scratched then don't drive it...problem solved!

[Mumtotwokids]

Firstly thank you for your responses to my dilema ( sorry it's taken so long to respond.)

I did speak with the mother on the day just to advise her what had happened and that I did not want her to hear it from someone else. I also told her that I will be inforcing ALL the kids (mine included) that they are not to ride their bikes down the side and they must leave them at the back. She did offer to pay for the touch up of the marks, at the time I felt I should say don't worry about it but I really was still quite p*ssed off.

I have read a few pages and I would like to clarify some of the points that have been raised since there has been alot written.

- it was an accident it was not malicious the little boy in question is a lovely boy, a bit of a free spirit, but not malicious. He is nearly 5.

- I know it was him since I came outside on my way to the pool with him and my child and saw the scratch (quite surprised I managed not to let out a long sentence full of colourful adjectives!:banghead:) I asked them both what happened here and he said " O sorry, I did it", quite casually. I told him off for riding next to the car and went up to the pool to furious to speak!!!!! :banghead: .

- He was not in my care. The park is small he is free to go where he likes within the boundary of the park. Most families are ok with this, there are alot of young children around who look out for each other, including his older siblings. No visitors are allowed into the park unless the are authorised by the owners. It is very much how we grew up in our suburbs as kids - anyhow I'm getting off topic. (each family have thier own rules that they are comfortable with for their children.)

- Yes it's on both panels at the top, and since washing my car it have seen that it is also at the bottom of the door.

- the car was parked beside our place in our designated car spot. It is usually parked at the back but there was something blocking me from parking there. I was responsible for parking it there and I admit it could have been parked in a better location.

- we are friends but more acquantences, but I still would not want to fall out about it.

- I don't subscribe to "dont' have nice things around kids and expect kids to look after them" philosophy. Kids should be respectful of all property regardless of new or well loved.


BUT I am still torn as to what to do, I don't know whether it is going to be expensive - my husband thinks it we will be out of pocket between $500 to $800 since one if not two doors will have to be resprayed, but I have have not gotten a quote(going tomorrow when I am not looking after kids), so this is a guestimate. This is why I am torn - yes it was an accident and it may have been my child, BUT it wasn't my child. Why should I have to be out of pocket so much for someone elses child. If my child had done this to someone elses car I would expect to have to pay and would seriously offer (which is what they have done) but my dilema is do I do the polite thing and let it go or let them take some of the responsibility too? :confused::confused:

I have read some great posts, some with differing points of view. I think I will have to see how much it costs and go from there. Thanks BUBHUBbers

[ladybugblue84]

Glad to see you spoke to the parents & are a step closer to fixing the problem.

Since they have offered to pay maybe you should ask them to pay half!? That way you are both shouldering the responsibility & you are not completely out of pocket!

On another note it was very honest of the boy to own up! A big :thumbsup: for telling the truth on his part I know a lot of kids would be too scared to say anything if nobody had saw him do it!

Good luck with it!

[bossoflatch]

to me that sounds like alot of money for them to cover and for you for an accident. Personally if i offered to pay i would only of expected $200-300 . is that just me ? for a scratch ?

can you perhaps ask them to source a quote? they might know someone in the business and it wouldnt cost so much .. mates rates :D

the child was only 4!!! yes almost 5 but you have to expect some accidents do happen - its a car.. you park it where you do assuming responsibility kwim ?

- if i park it near the trolley bay of course i would expect a few scratches over time.. (thats why i dont park it near the trolley bays :P)

I do believe that they need to respect our belongings but at 4 they are still grasping that concept.. Still if this was an older child i wouldnt of expected a $500+ bill :o

[Refresh]

I agree with Ladybug and Boss:thumbsup:....it seems like everyone involved has done the right thing...the boy was good to own up, you told the parents and they offered to pay. If it does end up being expensive maybe go halves :yes:

[Teegzie]

Since they have offered to pay maybe you should ask them to pay half!? That way you are both shouldering the responsibility & you are not completely out of pocket!

I think this is a great idea! That way neither of you are getting lumped with a huge bill for the car and neither of you have to feel bad about the incident. :)

[Mama2Mia]

i say get a quote and show the parents the quote and see how much they're willing to pay

yes it was an accident and it was very good of the boy to own up but still, someone's going to have to be out of pocket to repair the scratch and i don't think its fair for you to have to fork out hundreds of dollars for no reason!

others may disagree but you worked hard to buy that car of yours i'm sure so if anything, it might be a lesson for the parents to make sure they tell their kids to be more careful or to keep an eye on them more or something next time round.

[NewBeginnings]

I'm going to have to say I do agree with your partners estimate of it being that high! :yes:

And as horrible as I may sound... I would be expecting them to foot it too after your explanation.:o

It was very mature and well done of the child to admit it was him, and he should get praise for that. But IMO his parents should have been supervising him.

If my child had done it, I would be paying in full... well because it was mine/my childs fault. I wouldn't be expecting the persons who's car it was to foot it, because to me it wasn't their fault.

Good luck with it all and I hope you get it sorted amicably! :hugs:

[Whispers]

I'm going to go against the grain and say I'd be expecting the child's parent to be paying for it :o

I'm a very car person... and to me touching someone else's car is a big no no and I always go out of my way to not allow DS near people's cars and I freak when he does go near them. He gets lecture after lecture about people's cars and touching them... and heaven forbid if he does! I'm not kidding I freak! :o

I know accidents still happen... but I put myself in the other person's shoes and I know I'd be pretty p!ssed if it happened to my car... especially if it were a black car... If my DS scratched someone's car I know I'd be paying them to get it fixed, I couldn't not... so to me I'd just expect the same in return...:yes:

:iagree:

[Refresh]

I do agree newbeginnings that I wouldn't let my kids play unsupervised like that :no: I guess it is what they are used to though.