So what do yo do...

[mum2bubba]

for fun?

I look on Facebook and Myspace at all my friends' and classmates' photos and they all seem to have lives. Going out partying/nights out, camping/holidays etc. I'm just a boring mum that doesn't get out much. I see my friends every now and then but most of them don't have kids so its not like I just just drop everything and see them iykwim (I'm pretty sure most of you here can relate) I dunno, I'm just having a whinge. I am joining up at a new playgroup soon so hopefully I will make some new friends. I'd like friends that I can go out with, have girls' nights out and all that even just once a month or something without talking about kids all the time.

Anyone else feel like this?

Don't get me wrong, I love my kids very much but I would like a life outside of that too. I am also thinking about doing some short courses at TAFE this year (not sure what though) so hopefully might meet some people.

What do you do with your friends or even by yourself (without kids)?

[nsmonkey]

I defiantely know how you feel. My social life is on here or facebook.

I have joined a playgroup but they are older (nothing wrong with older) and they have there own friends aswell and do things together and I just don't want to intrude on them.
I have organised a day to meet a couple people off here and finally catch up with a few old school friends that now have kids. Still working on a date. :)

Other then that absolutely nothing by myself that doesn't involve the boys.

[our3boys]

what do i do without kids :laughing: thats funny i dont get any time away from my boys ds 1 is hanging over me now as i write this every now and then we go out for dinner or something but with money being tough atmit hasnt been for a long time well over due.

[aprileviesmum]

I defiantely know how you feel. My social life is on here or facebook.

I have joined a playgroup but they are older (nothing wrong with older) and they have there own friends aswell and do things together and I just don't want to intrude on them.
I have organised a day to meet a couple people off here and finally catch up with a few old school friends that now have kids. Still working on a date. :)

Other then that absolutely nothing by myself that doesn't involve the boys.

I agree about the playgroup. I went twice and i was the youngest by far, made me feel a bit alienated. Plus because i live with my parents in a 'good' suburb, i was the only single parent there. The other women were all married and older and richer. Most not all of my friends with kids dont get out much.

[~Mands~]

Without kids? Not a lot. Maybe pop to the shop on my own on DH's days off :laughing:!

I catch up with friends a fair bit (with DS though), and try and get DS out the house most days, even if it only ends up being just a walk around the block (I push him on his bike). DS has just started swimming lessons, though I am bummed as I have to sit on the sidelines now as he is ok in there by himself!

DH keeps suggesting we go out for a night out together, and do it occasionally too, have DS babysat. I just get all offended and say "he is our son, we chose to have him so why should we palm him off to other people so we can have fun without him" and "I am happy spending time together doing family things" yadda yadda.... he often mentions doing something 'adult' for a change. Dont take my post the wrong way though, he is a great daddy :p.

[mum2bubba]

I was recently at a new playgroup but all the mums there are older (like in their late 30s to early/mid 40s) and have part time jobs, I just felt like I didn't fit in (they are nice ladies though) the one before that was open age and it was pretty good but we moved house (I'd still go if I could) I catch up with some of the mums from there every now and then. Hopefully the one we're going to start soon is good too. I'd like to meet some people my age. I do get out every now and then but I often feel like an old granny just at home all the time (though I know old people who get out more than me). :rolleyes:

[PunkyDiva]

mum2cooper...I agree with your DH, having adult time away from children is very important. Whether it's a bath together or a night away. It doesn't make you a bad parent, indeed this time out often helps keep relationships & communication lines open & alive without distractions from children. This time can be for relaxation, when you are more likely to be able to talk about any issues or even just catch up on mundane stuff that doesn't revolve around the kids and so often gets overlooked.
There is nothing wrong with wanting time out from being a mum and wife. This "time out" from parents can be important developmentally for children as well.

It can take a few playgroups before you find a group that you "click" with so don't get dispondent, keep getting out there and meeting new people.
The grass often seems greener for other people but on the whole most of us have issues to be dealt with and life isn't always a bed of roses it appears.

Just my two cents worth anyway :D we've been together 19 years now so def worked for us. Hard to get 6 kidlets babysat but lucky we have fab friends.

[nsmonkey]

I too am another person where I hate asking people to watch the boys. I have NEVER spent a night away from DS2 and the only time I spent away from DS1 was when I was in hospital having DS2. We got married just over a year ago and well we didn't get to have a night by ourselves as the kids are "our" responsibility, we are the ones that chose to have them. Why shoudl we rely on anyone else to watch them. But then theres times if we do get away for 45mins or so I can't stop thinking about how they are and are they behaving. So its never a break.

[Nomsie]

What do I do for fun?

:confused:

What, you mean for myself? *scratches head*

I don't have time to have a shower most days!! :laughing:

[mum2bubba]

What do I do for fun?

:confused:

What, you mean for myself? *scratches head*

I don't have time to have a shower most days!! :laughing:

I have morning sickness and can't even throw up in peace. :rolleyes: Then when I try and have a nap (cos I'm so tired being pregnant) I either get the kids annoying me or Grant annoys me (he wants to "snuggle" but I just want to be alone at times you know?) or I want to be away from the kids.

[MummyCharmzy]

For now, while pregnant I do next to nothing.. like Rebekah though my husband openly encourages me to go out and enjoy myself kid free! So when I'm not pregnant I would go out 2-3 times a month with my friends to the pub/club and have a few drinks, or just girls nights for dinner etc

Now pregnant I recently went out for the first night in months, I went to the movies to see Bride Wars with my 2 bestfriends, it was lovely getting out of the house!

Most of thetime I'm home with the kids and socialise online but school terms I go to a young mums group and have friends over a fair bit too. Just difficult over the holidays!

[mum2bubba]

I am starting at a new playgroup soon so hopefully I will make some friends. I also want to get a part time or casual job after the baby is born (just working a few nights a week or something).

It'd be good to have some friends who I could see during the day, maybe go to the beach or go for a coffee or something. Hayley is off to kinder very soon and Skye will be starting at occasional care mid year (I think June/July) so I hope I can meet some mums there.

MummyCharmzy: You live near me, if you ever want to catch up (go for coffee or whatever) let me know. Totally up to you though as I understand some people don't like meeting people from the net. ;)