Please help - paed in Brisbane

[Bountiful]

My DS has been having behavioural difficulties for quite some time now. Yesterday we took him to our first paediatrician appointment at our local hospital (I went public) and basically he took one look at DS (who was playing up something shocking thankfully .. showing his true colors as this is what he is like at home) and said that DS is undoubtedly a 'tricky' child but that he doesn't believe in prescribing medication to children under the age of 6 for ADHD (which is what I suspected DS has, his father also has it) and that he thinks we need to see a psychologist for help with my parenting skills :007: In essence, he thinks I am a bad mother who can't discipline her child!!

I am so upset and angry about this - I am NOT soft on my child. I have tried so many techniques to improve his aggression and explosive and unprovoked temper tantrums - the PPP program, cutting out preservatives and food colors, time-outs, smacking, distraction, ignoring him. Nothing so far has worked, he ignores what I'm trying to teach him and lashes out because he can't get his own way :( The paed did say that he sees some markers for autism in DS, but that so we're not walking away 'feeling like nothing has been done' he has ordered bloods be taken (to check for Fragile X and chromosome abnormalities) and a urine test (to check for metabolic disorders). I was completely and utterly brushed off and not taken seriously and I have no faith whatsoever in the public system anymore!

DS NEEDS help!! He is suffering from something and I cannot go through another 3yrs of hell to wait until he is 6yrs old which appears to be the age where these damn doctors will actually DO something :mad:

I am waiting to hear back from a CDU at the Mater as to whether I am able to access their services (of course I expect to pay through the nose which will cause me no end of trouble as I am a sole parent on minimal income because I'm also studying at University), but I am hoping someone here can give me some advice, a recommendation to a private paed, ANYTHING!!

I am at my wits' end with DS behaviour. He is held hostage by his emotions and its heartbreaking to see, he is being alienated at daycare because he hurts the other children - he doesn't mean to, it's not that he's being malicious, but of course the children don't know that.

Please help :(

[3blue&1pink]

I am sorry it was such a crappy app!

But hey I have been told the same thing before as well.. my GP who has been my GP since I was pregnant with my son.. has told me for 3 and a bit years there is nothing wrong.. he still refuses to believe there is.. he blames my parenting.. blind or what?

First to get help with my son I asked for a referral to my local public health plaza, my son had a speech assessment. (I cant remember if your son has speech problems or not) from that assessment we received a referral to an Early Intervention Program. Which he starts this year.. that will pick his speech, coordination (nothing wrong with it though) and Comprehension up. I had to keep calling though for a few weeks to get anywhere, I ended up going straight to head office after the school he is attending would not return my calls, less then 3 days after contacting head office he was given a spot.

Now after that I contacted Mind and Hearts, simply because I was told wait to 6y.o before getting a diagnosis. That was to far away, something is wrong now.. I need help now not then. I received a diagnosis but I had to pay $600 for it.

I then made contact with Qld Mental Health, which one of the major kids hospitals in Brisbane have a special department that deal with this. (Mater)

He is now undergoing a 'mental assessment' simply because there is nothing physically wrong with him its obviously all mental.

This is a 3 app assessment, its free and after this is finished they will then put steps in place to deal with it and help correct it while he is young.



Thats my journey so far and I am now getting somewhere, On top of that the first app with mental health ended in really good news, they believe everything they have seen so far can be corrected, well corrected as much as possible. They believe my son's problems come back to the fact that he has an extremely high tolerance to pain!


Good luck :hugs:

[mum_I'm_hungry]

We see Aaron Easterbrook at the Mater and he's good (he's private). Another angle you might want to look at is individual psychology sessions at the Pathways Health and Research Centre. We took my daughter for a course with them as she has some emotional issues (though hers centre on shyness). They have some great psychologists there and I think you do get money back from Medicare.

Good luck!

[suemp]

may i ask muuma 2 3 what exactly does your son do? my 2 yr old is terribly behaved, so much worse than his brother was i feel i cant take him out in public and get nervous about it
and he also has an extremely high tolerance to pain. he broke his arm twice this yr hardly crying. the 2nd time it was bent out of shape (needing an op) and he was still using it 30 mins after accisdent. the orthopedic resident who would of seen many broken bones said he has never seen anything like it b4

back to your q op. my sons have been both private and public. at gold coast hospital, royal and mater (but different sections) and i have found the public system great and private not much better. my ds2 sees a professor on the gold coast i can give you details if you like but he is pricey
best of luck:hugs:

[3blue&1pink]

We see Aaron too, he is a really nice guy! :yes:



Umm what doesn't my son do?

We basically never took our son out in public when he was two, I would have rathered jump off a cliff then put myself through the hell of him in a shopping centre, now that he is older he is much better but I still have trouble.

He will hit, slap, kick, punch you name it he does it, when he is in one of his moods.

He has not been violent for over 3 weeks now.. and today he is talking A LOT! Which is a surprise.

DS1 doesnt feel pain, I do believe he could break and arm or leg and not cry once.

He cut his eye brow open after falling over at kindy one day. He didn't cry once so of course they just band aided it up and left him to play. Another mother who was a nurse came to pick there child up and seen it. She said he should be in a lot of pain and he needs a hospital. Yup he did need a hospital... 12 stitches later he was fine.


He also cut his head open (3inches long) after hitting his head on his dads trailer one day. Did not cry once.. another 15 stitches..

He was bitten by a wasp near his ear while checking the mail one day.. he just said 'Mummy bee bite me' no crying nothing!

2 weeks ago he shut his finger in the door, the nail is blue (I have taken him to the Dr) he is going to loose the nail.. he did not cry once.

NYE we had sparklers to burn.. I showed the two eldest how to hold them etc, DS1 touched it after it was out and burnt his hand, did not cry once.. DS2 touched it as well.. 4 hours later we still had tears!


He has no fear, nothing scares him.. He does not listen. I cannot let him out the front to play while I do something because he will run off and will not listen no matter how much I tell him to come back.

He was hurting his brothers really badly, but that seems to have stopped at the moment.

He also yells a lot, he will scream for the hell of it. If he is angry at you or your not listening to him he will raise his voice.

I actually have to say his name quite a few times to get his attention and make sure he is listening before talking to him.


Despite this he is very smart and can be a very caring boy when he wants to show that side. He is very handsome (as the Dr at mental health said) and has a lot of potential.

[suemp]

We see Aaron too, he is a really nice guy! :yes:



Umm what doesn't my son do?

We basically never took our son out in public when he was two, I would have rathered jump off a cliff then put myself through the hell of him in a shopping centre, now that he is older he is much better but I still have trouble.

He will hit, slap, kick, punch you name it he does it, when he is in one of his moods.

He has not been violent for over 3 weeks now.. and today he is talking A LOT! Which is a surprise.

DS1 doesnt feel pain, I do believe he could break and arm or leg and not cry once.

He cut his eye brow open after falling over at kindy one day. He didn't cry once so of course they just band aided it up and left him to play. Another mother who was a nurse came to pick there child up and seen it. She said he should be in a lot of pain and he needs a hospital. Yup he did need a hospital... 12 stitches later he was fine.


He also cut his head open (3inches long) after hitting his head on his dads trailer one day. Did not cry once.. another 15 stitches..

He was bitten by a wasp near his ear while checking the mail one day.. he just said 'Mummy bee bite me' no crying nothing!

2 weeks ago he shut his finger in the door, the nail is blue (I have taken him to the Dr) he is going to loose the nail.. he did not cry once.

NYE we had sparklers to burn.. I showed the two eldest how to hold them etc, DS1 touched it after it was out and burnt his hand, did not cry once.. DS2 touched it as well.. 4 hours later we still had tears!


He has no fear, nothing scares him.. He does not listen. I cannot let him out the front to play while I do something because he will run off and will not listen no matter how much I tell him to come back.

He was hurting his brothers really badly, but that seems to have stopped at the moment.

He also yells a lot, he will scream for the hell of it. If he is angry at you or your not listening to him he will raise his voice.

I actually have to say his name quite a few times to get his attention and make sure he is listening before talking to him.


Despite this he is very smart and can be a very caring boy when he wants to show that side. He is very handsome (as the Dr at mental health said) and has a lot of potential.


wow that is my ds2 to a tee. we go out...its a fight into the car seat , its a fight into the stroller, if i dare let him walk he just runs, if i hold him he fights to get down, he has a lovely personality just will not behave. i feel and must look like a useless mother as nothing i do works.
please keep us updated on your ds dx
tc sue:)

[bAaM]

My son is 7 and is going to see a Pead that deals in behaviour managment only I cant think of his name but will get back to you. (he is privite)

They think my boy has ODD as well as ADHD, it is routine to see a phycologist before they will say its ADHA, seeing the phyc is a good thing, there moving fast and can help you with technics to avoid meds. Dont take it personally its a good think.

I have learnt SOOO much from the 2 visits to the phyc so far, i THOUGHT i had tried everything.

Good luck mate i hope you can get some relief soon, i know how challanging they can be, and now my 2 yr old is monkey see monkey do arrr:hair:

[RaryGirl]

We see Bruce Lewis (works out of the Wesley) and have done since DD was 6 years old.

He's fantastic ... actually LISTENS to you, which I feel is really important as only we know what is going on at home with the child. And now DD is older (she's 10), he also talks with her (not at her or above her level) and makes sure understands what he is talking about.

Bruce is wonderful ... but extremely hard to get into ... he has a long waiting list, but it's worth a call.

We saw Aaron Easterbrook for the delivery of my youngest DD and he was lovely, but I don't have experience with him for an older child.

[3blue&1pink]

wow that is my ds2 to a tee. we go out...its a fight into the car seat , its a fight into the stroller, if i dare let him walk he just runs, if i hold him he fights to get down, he has a lovely personality just will not behave. i feel and must look like a useless mother as nothing i do works.
please keep us updated on your ds dx
tc sue:)

I have grown use to the stares. But yeah thats what my son does as well. I now talk to him the whole way through the trip. I will buy him a drink and something to eat and I ask him to hold things for me. If I keep him distracted he is a little bit better but I need to be ready for the flying arms and kicking legs.

We also had problems with the car seat, it was horrible. He would climb out of it no matter how tight it was. He would refuse to get back in. It was a mess. I still have some problems now but not as bad.

When I shop alone with him I have very little problems. Where abouts are you?

[suemp]

im on northern gold coast. yep i have a car seat escaper too which is hard as at 2 he is 18 kilos so in a booster seat. plus a big boof to try and restrain lol. yep only time he is vaguely still is if eatin or drinking. he even climbs out of shoppin trolleys. we having an iron issue atm as he refuses to eat properly. he is also behind in talkin

[Bountiful]

Thanks ladies for all your suggestions - I have a list here and if I don't get any help from whichever paed I end up seeing, I'll simply work my way down the list until I find someone who is willing to diagnose DS (with whatever the problem is!).

He's been seen by a speechy through the public system earlier this year - they were wanting to assess him to see if he was eligible for the Hanan program but he is of 'average' development so wasn't able to go through the program. His speech has come along in leaps and bounds since then, he never shuts up now :ecomcity:

We've seen an OT in the last 2 weeks so I'm waiting to receive her report in the mail and the paed that we saw publicly last week (or should I say quack) will be posting me his report also.

As for EIS, we were referred to the EIS unit of our local hospital and spent over 3 months working with a psychologist on his behaviour, trying to find a system that works for him - nothing worked and she also went through the PPP system with me one-on-one.

I tried cutting out preservatives and TBH it's not done very much. I don't buy biscuits etc from the supermarkets anymore, I make slices, cakes and biscuits at home. The only snack that I get for him from the shops are rice crackers and they're the expensive brand as they don't have any preservatives in them unlike the other brands (I've spent alot of time reading packages while shopping!).

I'll be doing abit more research today if I can to try and find out more about the Feingold diet (someone recommended this to me) - I'd like to take a look at a few of the recipes and try them to work out if they make a difference. Problem for me is that DS is really fussy eating anyway - he barely eats! The only foods I have been able to give him in the last few months have been yoghurt, milk, cheese, ham, banana, noodles, biscuits etc. Some of those foods aren't very healthy so I've had to supplement him with Pentavite :hissy:

I just need answers really so I know what's wrong with him!