advice about xmas Etiquette

[diamonds22]

...I know, I know....chrissy is ages away.....but I'm just trying to prepare myself....lol

Situation is, my hubby and I ALWAYS travel the distance to my mum and dads (an hour south) then the following day travel back north to dh parents (ends up being 2hours travel)....anyway this year we have decided that we wont be travelling anywhere (its not fair on us, even though I enjoy there company its just such a hassle driving)

I'm worried about everyone’s reaction when we tell them we are going to have our 'own' chrissy this year...the main reason i'm scared is because this will be our daughters first xmas...and no doubt they will think we are being selfish.

I wouldn’t mind having a chrissy do at our house so they can see her...but the simple fact is we don't have the room to facilitate everyone....our new house is nice and quaint (lol ie small...) plus were trying to save money so its just not feasible for us this year.

*breathes out* soooo any ideas on how to approach this delicate subject??? I kinda wanna mention it to them soon so its outta the way now and we don't have any stresses when xmas comes round...

xxx

[MumsieMel]

Ummm, nope! LOL

Maybe ask them to do chrissy at your house but make accomodation else where, and just do a cheap christmas lunch/dinner.

Would be good especially with DD's first christmas.

[SilverStarfish]

Good luck! :D

We have a similar problem. I got jack of spending Xmas day in the car a few years ago, so we introduced a roster system. But the will be our DD's frist Christmas too...

Though our house is "quaint" as well, I will be organising Christmas here. We had a "practise" run at Easter, and though it was a bit squashy, it will solve any arguments about who gets to see their Grandaughter on Christmas day. I'd love to have the day just to ourselves... but that's simply not an option for us :no:

But it might be for yours! If you explain to everyone how you feel about it, and be prepared to for a bit of grumbling, it might be ok.

I agree with the idea of getting it sorted out now. Christmas is stressful enough as it is!

[diamonds22]

heheh lol thanks girls:D

[misskittyfantastico]

Maybe you could have it but have them stay elsewhere and have a Chrissy picnic in the park or go out for the meal.

[OM]

We solved that problem last year by going out for x-mas lunch at a hotel in the city instead!;)

[Seekrit]

when you say you don't have the room, do you mean for stayers or just for entertaining?

Maybe you could have a BBQ? (ask everyone to bring something - or rather tell everyone to bring someone and make sure one person has the ham, one the turkey etc) with prawns! :D :D

We do the travelling thing ourselves, but we're going to keep doing that. We're going to spend Christmas morning as a family, then head up my my dad's (deception bay, 1.5 hours away) for lunch then down to his parents (ipswich, 30 minutes away, so 2 hours from Dad's) for dinner. That's how it's been arranged each year :)

[SilverStarfish]

If everyone bought a plate, or paid for their own meal, that would help cut down on the cost.

[sugar n spice]

Maybe you could have it but have them stay elsewhere and have a Chrissy picnic in the park or go out for the meal.

Thats a good idea, we have only had one xmas i think with dh family as their 4 1/2 hrs away but the first xmas i had with them they had a bqq picinic at the park near them. It was quite nice. Different for me as i had only ever grown up around the big xmas feast but it is cheaper and nice.

I cant see the problem though with 1hr driving and then driving the next day. For me that wouldnt be an issue but 4 hrs where the other side of our family is. Just my opinion.

We always have xmas with my family be it i cater or my mum but the person not catering brings some meat. If mums putting it on which she has the last couple of yrs i usually bring the turkey and something else and vice versa. We did used to take it in turn but i didnt a 2 yrs ago as i was on stric bed rest and preg and then the following year had a little one and this yr i will prob be on bed rest being preg so hopefully next year i will have my turn:rolleyes:.

Sorry it was long and i probably didnt help. Good luck:fingerscrossed:

[diamonds22]

misskitty...that could actually work!! a picnic sounds like a great idea and then my folks could say at my grandmas cos she lives there too..and the others can go back to the home which will only be 15mins away!!!

seekrit - no room for people to say over (which is what they will want cos they wont drive to our house unless they can sleep ova..but if we do the picnic thing they can stay at my grandmas) Entertaining at the new place will be really hard too (considering we only have a dining table for four!) just a bit to small for comfort really (its only a lil villa that we brought for investment purposes, but were going to live there for a couple of years then move to our big house at nth lakes)

Sugar n Spice its not really me with the problem of driving..its my hubby...he says its the principal that we shouldn’t have to do it every year while know one else makes and effort to drive to us (not just a chrissy time...every time someone wants to see us...we have to go to them and its never the other way around)...I think he’s doing the whole 'I’m the daddy now so what I say goes' thing (ie he doesn’t want us getting walked on/taken advantage of anymore)..does that make sense:confused:

Thanks girls problem solved the picnic/barbie should be a go'er and everyone should be happy!!! :thumbsup:

[misskittyfantastico]

I'm so pleased Diamonds, it's really special being with your family for your DD's first Christmas....I hope you have a lovely day.

[InSaneOne]

we have the same problems but i live 5 minutes away from my parents and 30 minutes from dh's. our problem is that my family always gets put last. so this year at easter we had them all here for lunch. (we normally have lunch at dh's parents then dinner at mine and after eating 2 huge meals you kinda come home feeling sick) this year we got everyone together and everyone brought something. that way we had a small family breakfast just the 3 of us - then biomum dropped of the steps about 11am and the rest of the family turned up about 12. we had a buffet style and people brought their own chairs and drinks and we had plastic plates and everyone ate on their laps. (except the little kids who sat in high chairs). fun for everyone.

we also had a lovely mothers day as we had my parents and grandparents and my sister with dh's mum and dad and the dads sat at one end of the tables talking about cars and fishing and the mums sat at the other end talking about stuff we women talk about. (and havng lots of cuddles with the baby)

[Sarie]

We have decided to do the same this year. We live 1 hour from my inlaws and 3 hours from my parents. After traveling all over the country side last year we decided we would stay in town and have Christmas just the 4 of us. Unfortunately my mother has interpreted this as they are going to come and have Christmas here. I still have to break the news that this is not the case, or we would have to have both families here and it's really not what we want.

[*Chels*]

my advice-do what YOU want to do!!With Claudias arrival-you will have your own new wee family!!!
It will be my sons first xmas this year(well not his first,but one where he isnt 2 months old and not have a clue!!)
so i will be having xmas at MY house MY way!!because i want it to be special,and if noone likes it-stuff them!!
I will have my beautiful DF and DS and thats all that matters!!

[Littletreasures]

we had the same problem last year although DS was only 5 and a half months i really just wanted to stay at home a be with OUR Family just the 3 of us but instead we ended up having to drive everwhere my sisters for breakfast then to my dads, then to a friends for lunch, then to BIL house then to MIL house then we finally got back to our house at 6 pm and i had to make dinner bath DS feed him and get him of to bed, so my new rule is we dont leave the house on christmas day if they want to see us they can come to us...

[Rachael]

My bub will be 5months old this christmas and being the planner that I am I told my family and DHs family last christmas that we will be having Christmas day at our place as I refuse to drag a 5month around to everyone's house.

I was harsh lol, said that if they want to see their first grandchild on christmas day then they could come to us:yelclap:

Both sides are coming:thumbsup:

[SilverStarfish]

Good for you, Rachael:thumbsup: Our little DD will be 9 months old, and I'll be telling the relatives exactly the same thing.