Coming Out...?

[MimiGrace]

I was just getting curious, since there have been a few rather heated debates about homosexuality/bisexuality in peoples children on bubhub in the last few days (not that thats a bad thing).
But a comment was made that the girl in question (age 18) had never shown any signs of being bisexual before, and therefore was just 'following the trend'.

Am i the only one who took AGES/never told their parents and other older family members? I'm 19 (and bi), and i just don't see how my sexuality impacts my parents, so i choose not to tell them.
If/when i start dating a woman it will become relevant and of course i will tell them.


Am i the only one? :o

[NibbleCurlynBub]

WOW..

I must have missed al these heated debates.

Anyway.

If I do find I am a different sexuality or a combination of both (still a possibility, you never know), I wouldn't tell my parents at all, most likely.

Its not exactly their business what I do with my personal life, nor who I choose to or not to have sex or relationships with.

Plus, It shouldn't matter.

I'd love my kids just the same gay, straight, or fluorescent orange.

[munchkins]

I do know one of the threads you are talking about MG and wow what a thread. I am bi. Only one person that I know I have told and that is my DF. I do not think think that I should tell my family just because they are family. If I never tell them that is my choice and no one elses..

If one of my daughters came home one day and told me that they were bi or lesbian and found a girl they liked... I would be happy for them for as long as my kids are happy then so am I

[Baldie's Mum]

I am pretty sure that my mum and dad dont ask when or if i have a sexual relation with my DH or when i was younger any other guy. So why should it be any different if i bought home a girl???

I dont think it is their business but i would introduce my girlfriend or boyfriend as that. "mum this is my girlfriend xxxx"

[Fuchsia!]

If i were to be involved in a female relationship i would probably act just the same as i would if it were a male. I wouldn't feel the need to come out as i don't think there is anything to come out of. If my parents didn't like it then that would be their problem, not mine.

I know all families are different though. I would expect my parents to act the same as they would if it were a male.

Im not gay nor am i hetrosexual, im just me and if i happen to fall in love with a woman then i do :) I haven't yet but you just never know until the right person comes along.

[~isis~]

no your not. im 24 and have never came out and said yeh mum im bi. when i was younger i thought i was a lesbian, but was to scared to say anything to my family as my brother and sister used to bash me up and call me a dyke and i never even said i liked girls. then i discovered i liked boys too but that wasnt until i was almost 18 and had dated a number of girls. i have been with both boys and girls scence then and i thought id come out if i found the one and they happened to be a girl. but i found my partner who is a man and dont see the point saying yeh im bi but i wont be dating girls anymore. if you get my drift.. sorry this is long but i just feel everyone has the right to date who they wish as long as both ppl in the relationship are happy and not being hurt, its all good.
only a few ppl know about me my ex girlfriends and my current partner that is all and thats really all that need to know.

[JJJRain-crew]

i find this an incredably interesting topic...I am a young mum and i used to consider myself label free...i have always had the attitude that whatever happens in life happens for the purpose of personal evolution, because life is continually evolving :) I am attracted to both sexes, for me thats the way its always been, and I believe it is a very natural human trait :) But my parents do not share that belief as many others don't...My lovely fiance and I would love to share our marriage with another woman who we both love of course because we believe for us it would work :) (or man if that is how it happens LOL)...now that i would never tell my folks, they just wouldn't get it at all... but if they happened to find out, then meh, they would get over it...although they r old and do have high blood preasure LOL. But that raises another question in my mind, I have a little daughter who I hope will grow up with appreciation for all different types of people but also knows how she identifies herself and her own individuality... I dont know weather or not i would tell her about my sexuality at the right time...or just let her come to understand in her own time :) wat r ur thoughts on this? just curious!

[MimiGrace]

rainjaa
i wouldn't come out and tell her that you identify yourself as XYZ, unless she specifically asks, or you feel that its totally appropriate.
Nothing worse than a bit tmi from parents (even if its just parents describing what they did with an x, or what happened at a fun school function:rolleyes:)

Just make sure that she knows how you feel about non-straight people, so that she can feel comfortable with it.
And don't be offended if she doesn't tell you herself if she does identify as gay/bi etc. I just can't tell my mum. I should (dad constantly pokes fun at me, and insinuates i'm gay because i haven't brought a guy home yet :p - all in a very nice way!) but MY sex life, is not something i want to discuss with my parents until it is for procreation purposes only. even then, we'll see...:sunshine:

[JJJRain-crew]

lol i dont think it would be really necassary to openly tell my daughter unless she asked me at some point, then I would be honest...my sexuality doesn't define my personality...and when she is at a stage in her life where she may ask these questions then she will come to her own conclusions... she has her own path to travel...all i can do is keep the communications open and if she feels safe to open up to me about watever...then I will be glad...either way as long as she is true to herself and be posative that her decisions are right for the moment she is in...I will be proud of her...because I know that whatever shall be shall be. As for taking on a second wife, if that was to ever happen...well i'd cross that bridge when i come to it and make a decision based on the moment :)...well anyway here I am ramling on again LOL

[2mums]

Well I am gay and proud to say it!! And married to my beautiful wife. I must admit that it took me some time to accept it and even more to tell my parents but that was only becuase i had argued with my dad about homosexuality for most of my adolescence. I think everyone is entitled to their own opinion BUT for me - having my parents know was essential to me completely accepting who i was - why lie about who u r to the ones who r suppose to love you the most. Its suffocating. The more open i was with them the better they got with having a lesbian daughter. They love my wife and have no issue with us being gay or trying to become gay parents.

Comments about telling children - my ex had a son and she told him at age 3 that she was gay - we were very open and he knew that most of our friends were gay and he coped fine.