View Full Version : Thanks to the poster that
I guess what they say is entirely correct. I started polite thread, saying thanks for all the research and ppl giving their opinions and got blasted for a) daring to state that I had made a decision and shock horror posted my decision and b) thanking ppl for their help.
For that, one response was "men" with rolling eyes and that while i am at it to circumcise my wife.
Thanks so much bub hub for that.
I should have known better than to try and be polite in on a public forum.
And these same ppl wonder why they are treated badly ????
I signed up to this site because someone said it's a shame there aren't more men to offer their opinions, well all I can say, is it's a shame some ppl haven't learned basic manners and learned how to listen to other's viewpoints even if you don't agree with them without being rude and disrespectful.
I won't be back here and this thread will most likely get deleted, but at least I know, I've said what needed to be said, and maybe that poster, and you know who you are, might learn something about themself.
I read some of that post your talking about and I was shocked what peoples responses were...and that they got away with what was said.
You making a decision that you think if right for your child and its no one elses business....good for you for standing up for yourself!
Thanks. I was merely thanking ppl. Nothing more. Nothing less.
I hope that no one else is treated like that here and that those posting, learn something from it at least.
All the best.
Skittles
03-01-2009, 21:46
Im so sorry you were made to feel this way. Unfortunatly on a forum as large as bubhub there are so many different opinions. There will always be a few that dont agree with you.
I read the thread u were talking about and i have to admit...it was quite rude. Good for you for coming to the decision for you son...
onabreak
03-01-2009, 21:47
I also read your post and was disgusted by some responses of people on here.
I say good on you for making the right decision for your son. My son is done and no one was going to make me change my mind.
Some people are shallow minded.
Imadad, please don't leave.
There are a few topics on BH that you're not allowed to be diplomatic about, and a lot of us have learned that the hard way - vaccinating, circing, and anything pro bottlefeeding.
You're right - this forum does need more male opinions.
You weren't treated the way you were because you are male, believe me any woman who writes anything pro circ is treated in exactly the same manner.
Thanks for posting your reply - I think the way you were spoken to was terrible!
codswallop
03-01-2009, 21:51
i agree stick around!!!
dont let the nasties chase you off!
just do what we all do and ignore the rude ones! also if your really upset let the mods know
we all have opinions that can get heated at times and i think we forget that there are real ppl on the other side of the computer screen!
RoarsomeMum
03-01-2009, 21:54
Its DEF not cause your male.. Like Ange said.. some people here get awfully concerned about OTHER people's children.. Christ know's who is looking after theirs when they are up on their soap boxes here all day (NOT talking bout anyone specific.. just in general)
From what I saw of the thread the rude posts were deleted. The mods are very sensitive to people being bullied on the site and will not tolerate it. If you ahve a problem with a response just report it.
As a PP said, with a site this big it is unlikely everybody will agree with you. Having said that you dont ahve to put up with unwanted bullying.
LilShenanigans
03-01-2009, 22:04
Hey, I read your other post, but not the responses.. I didnt reply simply because I wasn't part of the advice giving but also I don't think I could do what you chose. It doesn't mean I'd blast you for it, it's your choice.. I respect that. hell, the amount of stuff I do in my own parenting style.. well, everyone here would hate me :D
But, ignore that other thread. I assure you we have all ****ed someone off at some stage, and I can tell ya, I keep trying to do it again but they get used to you. Stick around, we're not all bad, mean or hormonal crazies.. Some of us are medicated for a lot of that :p
oh i didn't realise the posts had been deleted sorry :o
but stick around! we need more males around here to keep us crazy females in order!
I have to whole heartedly agree that it's not cause you're a man, and I agree that there are people who do need to learn some manners and that perscpectives can differ without being 'wrong'.
Different people and circumstances and beliefs result in different decisions. It's as simple as that.
Please hang around. We need more men on here, and we certainly need men who aren't afraid to share their opinion, or it'd defeat the purpose!
~Temet Nosce~
04-01-2009, 08:49
Unfortunately some people are just too closed-minded and refuse to even consider it ok to look outside the square. If I have a son I don't intend to circ, but I don't exactly look down on others who do. Nor should anyone else.
I saw your other thread and I too was discusted at the responses that were made (most by ppl who have been here a long time too :shame:).
Unfortunatley Circ is a subject that can't be talked about in this forum unless you do it in the PRO CIRC thread.....something I never knew untill I was jumped on and told how I mamed my sons ect...unbelieveable!!!!
Don't let these ppl drive you away..they were rude and should be ashamed of the way they responded to a new member who was simply thanking others for info and being polite.
The mods didn't remove these offensive posts soon enough!! Some seem to get away with rudeness while others are scorned :rolleyes:
In future..please only post about circ in the PRO Circ section..you will get nothing but support :thumbsup:
delirium
04-01-2009, 08:58
I have to whole heartedly agree that it's not cause you're a man, and I agree that there are people who do need to learn some manners and that perscpectives can differ without being 'wrong'.
:iagree:
Unfortunatley Circ is a subject that can't be talked about in this forum unless you do it in the PRO CIRC thread.....something I never knew untill I was jumped on and told how I mamed my sons ect...unbelieveable!!!!
...In future..please only post about circ in the PRO Circ section..you will get nothing but support :thumbsup:
:yes::yes::yes:
I saw your thread, can't remember if I posted.
But the responses weren't surprising. Circumcision is a very emotional topic for a lot of people and alot of those people have VERY strong views.
Next time as said, post in the pro-circumcision section.
Sheer Bliss
04-01-2009, 09:07
I didn't respond to the other thread, as I generally stick to the rule 'if you haven't got something nice to say, then don't say it' The ONLY reason read the other thread, is because it was in the 'discuss it' section. By reading the rules of the circumcision section, you would be aware that this section welcomes posts from ALL people (although they don't need to be rude about it). Had you posted in the 'pro-circ' area, you would have been greeted with only positive responses, as that is what that section is for - support.
Circ is a very emotive topic for some people, and that is why the various sections exist - pro, discuss and anti. So that everyone can get the support they need, something that can easily be found out by reading the guideliness/rules for each section before posting.
I am sorry for your loss if you are going to leave the site, it is fantastic, and if you are going to get upset because you didn't read the guidelines before posting/posting then it really is your loss. There are some people that come accross as very rude and abrassive, it happens in all sections, and the mods are usually quick to delete those posts, if you are offended by something someone has said to you, make sure you report it.
I may be reading this wrong but from what a couple of you have said it sounds like your suggesting it was his fault that he got abused because he posted in the wrong thread?
Maybe he should have, and I'm sure if he'd known he would have but he didn't...so instead of people abusing him maybe they should have pointed him in the right direction?
codswallop
04-01-2009, 11:13
well said tegan!
delirium
04-01-2009, 11:18
I may be reading this wrong but from what a couple of you have said it sounds like your suggesting it was his fault that he got abused because he posted in the wrong thread?
Maybe he should have, and I'm sure if he'd known he would have but he didn't...so instead of people abusing him maybe they should have pointed him in the right direction?
I don't know if this is directed at me, but I certainly didn't mean if was his fault that he didn't post in the pro-circ section. My post was more in agreeance that no one can talk about the subject without getting pounced on, unless it's posted in the pro section. :)
I totally agree with you that no matter your stand point on any subject, nastiness is not on :no:
I may be reading this wrong but from what a couple of you have said it sounds like your suggesting it was his fault that he got abused because he posted in the wrong thread?
Maybe he should have, and I'm sure if he'd known he would have but he didn't...so instead of people abusing him maybe they should have pointed him in the right direction?
:iagree:
I totally agree with you that no matter your stand point on any subject, nastiness is not on :no:
:iagree:
People responding to threads need to use TACT no matter what the topic or which section it is located.
It's ridiculous how the "dicsuss it" section seems to be overrun by sarcastic and nasty comments when it's supposed to be a discussion. There is an anti-circumcision section for all that sort of nonsense.
Sheer Bliss
04-01-2009, 11:39
I don't know if this is directed at me, but I certainly didn't mean if was his fault that he didn't post in the pro-circ section. My post was more in agreeance that no one can talk about the subject without getting pounced on, unless it's posted in the pro section. :)
I totally agree with you that no matter your stand point on any subject, nastiness is not on :no:
:iagree:
There is NO need for anyone to be abused regardless of where they post. I didn't read all of the other thread, only the first post, so I have no idea what was said or how bad it got. The point I was trying to make was that it happens to everyone, it had nothing to do with him being a man, as he suggested. IF you have problems with posts, then you need to report them, not sit there and simmer about it, and then leave a site.
The reason I didn't point him in any direction, is that there ARE some members here, who LIKE to stir the pot, so when you just read one post, especially by a new member, you never know what the reasoning was behind it, so i just left it alone. Here he seemed to be making a totally different point, which is why i said something about the guidelines of each section.
i posted in the other thread that if i was you i would tell them to stick it.. glad you did finally :laughing::yelclap:
sweetsugardumplin'
04-01-2009, 23:12
we need more males around here to keep us crazy females in order!
Excuse me! :eek:
NibbleCurlynBub
04-01-2009, 23:19
Im so sorry you were made to feel this way. Unfortunatly on a forum as large as bubhub there are so many different opinions. There will always be a few that dont agree with you.
:iagree: This is mainly the problem.
We have all had this happen and at times I have left the hub as well.
Nobody gets 100% agreeable, really.
I hope you do come back to the Hub after a bit, unfortunately your first experience has been with something so controversial as circumcision.
HappyLittleChappy
04-01-2009, 23:28
I read your original thread, however the responses were deleted before I had a chance to read them.
Do not leave the forum because of some rather rude responses to your decisions.
Millions of children are circumcised, and millions aren't. It's all personal choice really and there are always going to be those that disagree with your opinions and choices.
Being rude about it however is uncalled for, there's a much nicer way to state your opinion on things rather than be nasty about it. I've read quite nasty responses on bubhub threads before, and I believe a lot of posters need to respect that not everyone agrees with them.
Also to those people... Just because you believe something, does NOT mean it is right. You can have all the facts and figures and opinions of professionals you want, but there will always be other facts, figures and professionals on the opposing side.
Please when you're stating your opinions, re-read your posts before you submit them. Check that you aren't being forceful in that your opinion is the RIGHT opinion and anyone that disagrees MUST be wrong. Because quite simply, you might be 100% sure you've got your facts right, but there's every chance you don't.
Maybe try starting your posts with "I think" or "I feel" rather than "It is right" or "it is wrong". Respect others opinions, as you would like yours to be respected.
codswallop
05-01-2009, 00:50
hear hear!!!
very well said mummy2phoenix!
Bewitched
05-01-2009, 00:59
Welcome to what can be quite a harsh virtual world my friend. I wouldn't leave the Hub on anyone's account though, i just let tight minded obnoxious peoples words wash over me. Hope u stick around :thumbsup:
bronny-jane
05-01-2009, 10:15
I won't be back here and this thread will most likely get deleted, but at least I know, I've said what needed to be said, and maybe that poster, and you know who you are, might learn something about themself.
dont leave on my account imadad2, ive left the forum, just came here to check something, and saw this..
so you wont have to butt heads with me again;)
as for learning something about myself.. ok i'll admit my comment was a little crass and degrading, and yes i did receive some infractions for it.. but it hasnt changed my mind on circumcising:no:..
anyway.. now im off again.. so please dont leave because i was rude, theirs plenty of great parents here, with wonderful advice who would be able to benefit from your own experiences...
and if your thinking im a b!tch, i can assure you im not, just have very strong views on circumcision, and if i do come back to the hub, i have to not come in here... shame we had to have our first and last conversations in here...
so anyway, dont leave because i was nasty, there's lots of information and fun to have on here... and we all cop some sh!t every now and then.. guess you got nailed sooner then most of us:p... no hard feelings hey..
go, and enjoy... and i do apologize once again for being a nasty, narky, rude and arrogant poster... everyone has a bad day right;)
sockstealingpoltergeist
05-01-2009, 10:38
I didn't get to see the thread in it's original form. I got to see the editied version only lol.
Any way, you may leave or stay as you wish it is up to you. However there are some subjects that people are more passionate about and if you want to enter them you have to have a thick skin.
Oh yes and like all of us we have to learn where to put certain threads so we don't get quite so battered.:yes:
Not much offends me anymore, it is a public forum and sometimes as in real life, if you were to join a group you arn't allways going to get along with everyone.
I wish you well.:)
As the main mod on this section, I just wanted to mention a few things. Rudeness is not tolerated on the forum at all, it doesn't matter in which of the circ sections you post. The rules about being polite and the restriction on language remain the same in each section. What changes in each sub section is the views of the ppl with whom you are speaking.
Secondly, not all posts are read by all moderators. I am the only moderator who will read every post for these sections and it might be a day or two before I catch up with things. So please, if you see a rude or harsh post anywhere in these sections, report it (little red triangle at the top RHS of every post). Click the triangle and let us know in a few words what is wrong. Reporting a post notifies all of the moderators, getting you a much faster response.
We also use reports to judge whether something does have to be deleted, sometimes the moderators chat about something but feel it is borderline and OK to leave in place. If there are reports from a hubber, that does sway us towards deletion or editing.
Cheers
report it (little red triangle at the top RHS of every post). Click the triangle and let us know in a few words what is wrong. Cheers
Didn't even notice this till you pointed it out :thumbsup:
:oI'm a dibber-dobber so know where it is and how to use it:p
Our mods do an awesome job, but there are so many of us posting. We need to help them out where we can by reporting this sort of stuff... oh, and the advertising stuff that pops up every now and again :ecomcity: I report it straight away :laughing:
shockinamillion
05-01-2009, 15:55
I hope you don't leave hun. Just a few nasties. People get pretty heated up when they think that they are right and the other person wrong. :)
*affectionately biatch slaps BJ* :hugs:
*pokes tongue at Ivy the dobber* :yes::laughing:
bronny-jane
09-01-2009, 09:15
*affectionately biatch slaps BJ* :hugs:
well so long as its an affectionate slap:devil6:
honestly i just thought the post was to irritate us... small amount of post count, circ thread.. so i figured i'd play.. my bad
moonwildflower
13-01-2009, 22:26
honestly i just thought the post was to irritate us... small amount of post count, circ thread.. so i figured i'd play.. my bad
Admittedly it did look a little like that, and I can understand why you thought he said it just to irritate people (I read the other thread just before to see what this was about so didn't see the deleted posts) especially considering if he has read the circumcision threads on here he would know that there are hubbers who are very passionate about it and the topic sparks a lot of debate.
BUT a lot of hubbers tend to read and not post much, especially when they're new, as imadad is. I know for a very long time I rarely posted, but I read a lot. He may be doing that, you never know.
He posted to say thank you to the hub for supplying him with the information he needed to make a decision and was attacked. A bit harsh IMO no matter how his post came across. His decision was clearly already made, he didn't post for opinions or judgement, just to say thanks. If anyone didn't agree with his decision then maybe they shouldn't have responded. But that's just me.
imadad - I hope you don't leave just because some things have been misconstrued :no:
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