I feel mean, but don't know what I should do...

[Benji]

I vowed never to talk to XDP after he was absolutely horrible to me last week and I've kept my word on that.

However, a couple of weeks ago he kept trying to talk me into going out "for a few drinks" :rolleyes: with him, and he knew that I would not be comfortable with that. I made it clear I didn't want to go with him, yet he still was stupid enough to change his roster to go out on Saturday night with me :confused:

Anyway, I'm not going. That's sort of a separate issue anyway.

Yesterday he called me and said he'd come with me to Westfield to get DS's xmas laybuy. So I figured, sure it's for DS.

He also wanted to take DS out tonight to see his mum, which I was glad about anyway because she hasn't seen him in ages.

Last night he sent me a text "don't forget to get your parents to babysit for Saturday night" and I just replied "I'm not going"! AARGH. He is so thick. He always conveniently forgets things to work in his favour but seriously I do NOT want to go.

That was the last I heard from him yesterday.

This morning I get a text "forget about Westfield I'm not going, just drop Brayden off at my house at 6" and I replied (I don't know if I should feel awful or not but I sort of feel like he really deserves it) "no, you're being a sh*t to me, I'm not doing you any favours, you can go by yourself".

I do feel bad for his mum and him in a weird way but seriously, why should I make two one hour trips for someone who has obviously got the sh*ts up with me because I won't let him get me drunk to take advantage of me on Saturday night?!

AARGH :hair: why did I have a baby with this horrible man?!?!

[Benji]

Lol just got another text "fine, it's only my mum who misses out. I guess she's used to it by now"..

I love how it's always my fault! I'm always begging him to take DS to see his mum, HE is the one too slack to ever take DS even for himself.

:hair::hair:

[MummyDaddy]

Emotional blackmail.

Maniupulation.

Control.

Don't get sucked in ...

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

[faroutbrusselsprout]

Emotional blackmail.

Maniupulation.

Control.

Don't get sucked in ...

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

:yes:

Stay strong! You did the RIGHT thing.
His mum misses out becasue of HIM!
And stick to your guns about sat night, NOTHING positive will come of it.
He sounds horrible! :yes:
Thank goodness you're not with him anymore! :yelclap:

[Benji]

Thanks ladies. Yes, manipulation & control that is exactly what he does to me! I've put up with it for too long and I am done!!!

Now that I'm on holidays from work I am doing him NO favours. I always drop DS off and pick him up and it's not a quick trip to do twice in two days AND get to and from work. So stuff him. If he wants to see DS he has to get his own transport (he was stupid enough to lose his licence).

If his mum wants to come and pick DS up, fine. But I'm not wasting any more petrol doing X favours.

I really feel like I try everything in my power to keep the peace, when I'm faced with him doing nothing but try to hurt me and make me upset. So I just won't talk to him any more ever.


Thank goodness you're not with him anymore! :yelclap:

HOORAY! I am grateful for that every day, believe me :laughing:

[SassyMummy]

Don't feel mean - you don't HAVE to go out anywhere with him, nor do you have to be the designated chauffer.

If you still want him to see his grandmother, then is there perhaps a way you can drop your son around to see her? That way, you're not doing your ex any favours, but your son will still get to see his grandmother.

I can't believe he said that she's the only one who will miss out - what about your ex? Will he not care that he won't see his son? What a tosser.

[gonnabeaGR8mum]

don't feel mean- as you said its HIS choice to ignore your wishes, therefore he's chosing the outcome, you're not punishing him!

tell him his MUM can see her grandson whenever she likes- its not your responsiblity to ensure that she does.

[Benji]

Don't feel mean - you don't HAVE to go out anywhere with him, nor do you have to be the designated chauffer.

If you still want him to see his grandmother, then is there perhaps a way you can drop your son around to see her? That way, you're not doing your ex any favours, but your son will still get to see his grandmother.

I can't believe he said that she's the only one who will miss out - what about your ex? Will he not care that he won't see his son? What a tosser.

He certainly is that!!!

The problem is she lives out in the country, it's about a 3 hour drive for me. That's why she rarely sees DS which is really sad because when she's in Adelaide, most normal people would go out of their way to get some time off work, get their child and see their mum.

But NOPE not my X!!! His mum was in hospital not long ago and he didn't even take DS to see her :banghead:

I didn't mind dropping off and picking up, but if this is the sort of attitude I get in return for doing it, he can kiss my curvy butt goooooooooodbye!!!

[Benji]

I am sitting here shaking with anger...

Did I mention he has DS one day per week on Mondays when I go to work, now he informs me he's putting him in daycare on Mondays because he "has" to work.

I am honestly so SICK of our lives revolving around his stupid work. I work Mondays because he insisted that Mon was the ONLY day he could take DS, then he cracked the sh*ts with me when I did work Mondays and said I should have changed to Tuesdays :rolleyes:

He is SO infuriating.

I'm trying so so so so so hard not to call him and give him a mouthful :banghead:

[naiwen]

What a tool!

I am so sorry hun he is such a PITA, as long as he pays for the care and it's high quality care I guess it's not too bad?

I think you have done the right things.

[WarriorMummy]

so when does he see him then??

[Benji]

so when does he see him then??

He reckons on weekends but

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH AHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

I think pigs would fly before that ever happens!!



I just called him :o oops! I think I need to just never talk to him again, because he gets me so upset that I either end up in tears or so angry that I can't even deal with DS. I'm done with him!

[WarriorMummy]

stuff him

if he doesnt want to enjoy your son when he can then its his loss

i agree- only deal with him if it has anything to do with your ds- anything else can be forgotten

[Nowhere]

Lol just got another text "fine, it's only my mum who misses out. I guess she's used to it by now"..

I love how it's always my fault! I'm always begging him to take DS to see his mum, HE is the one too slack to ever take DS even for himself.

:hair::hair:


to me that would seal the deal and make me know i had made the right decision, I hateit when people play the marter lol, and try to make you feel bad

men grrr

[Benji]

to me that would seal the deal and make me know i had made the right decision, I hateit when people play the marter lol, and try to make you feel bad

men grrr

:hair::hair::hair: You're telling me!

He's on the phone to me, trying to make up :rolleyes:

[2and2istrouble]

Emotional blackmail.

Maniupulation.

Control.

Don't get sucked in ...

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

:iagree: emotional blackmail to the extreme. What is with ppl that do this!!!!!!!

Seriously!!!

Don't feel bad, don't fall for it.

[bubs_and_us]

why cant the ex's mum come to see your son? why is it up to you to drive to them?!

[Benji]

why cant the ex's mum come to see your son? why is it up to you to drive to them?!

I have no idea TBH. Nobody in his family seem to want to see DS :( I know his mum does at xmas, birthdays etc but X is just too slack to do anything to make it happen.

X called me and said she can come to my house to see DS, but I'm at the point where I'm just so angry I want to see none of them at this point. Knowing his family though, they will harrass me until they get their own way :hair: