Ever get frustrated??

[krystallxx]

Hi, just a few questions and a bit of a rant about a few things that frustrate the absolute **** out of me !!

Does it ever frustrate you that every single person in the shopping centres, supermarket, walking down the street etc HAS to make a comment about 'twins'! I get alot of comments too about being young and assuming im on my own. But the 'omg, you poor thing' or ' oh i feel so sorry for you, double trouble', etc etc drives me insane, too the point where im ready to just stay at home forever. I cannot go anywhere without having 1000090459038458934 people ask me 25653 questions!!!! I know they are interested and whatever, but honestly, do i go and ask them 104849305 questions about their kids. NOO!! I dont think they can comprehend that maybe i love being a twin mum, maybe i find it rewarding and very challenging at the same time, maybe they both arent going to be naughty therefore double trouble doesnt apply ??


That rant over with. ahaha :laughing::yelclap:

Another question, Do you ever get so over whelmed or over emotional you just have to walk away, even with bubbas crying?
Today, i just got soo sick of settling, after 13weeks and 1-2hrs each sleep time of resettling i just couldnt take anymore today!! I had to just leave them in the cot crying. I have felt horrible about it all day, i should be able to deal with this sort of thing, but i just couldnt do it anymore. Im soooooo tired and emotion atm, got a few other things going on in life!!

Just wondering if any of you other multiple mums/dads get frustrated sometimes?

haha massive rant there . sorry guys !!!

[MimiGrace]

Sorry i have absolutely no advice to give. Although the bit at the end reminds me of what a lot of other newbie mums have said (so i wouldn't worry about it too much). Maybe get your DF or mother to take them for a few hours into a room where you can't hear them so you can just sleep or stare at a wall, or read a book kinda thing?

And i'm sorry you get comments like that when your out and about. I would never have the guts to go up to someone i didn't know and say anything about their child/children (well i did, but that was usually at hotels and airports when i'd been there for 3 hours next to them...), but i think a line like 'double trouble' might just be them wanting to give you recognition and some encouragement. So i wouldn't take it badly!!!

And assuming ur single...i actually do that quite a bit. i see someones age and just think they must be unattached (because most the girls i know that had kids at that age, broke up with the dads). So i apologise to you, cause i can't to the rest ;)
And ur bubs are GORGEOUS!!!:kiss:

[Miss_N]

Does it ever frustrate you that every single person in the shopping centres, supermarket, walking down the street etc HAS to make a comment about 'twins'! I get alot of comments too about being young and assuming im on my own. But the 'omg, you poor thing' or ' oh i feel so sorry for you, double trouble', etc etc drives me insane, too the point where im ready to just stay at home forever. I cannot go anywhere without having 1000090459038458934 people ask me 25653 questions!!!! I know they are interested and whatever, but honestly, do i go and ask them 104849305 questions about their kids. NOO!! I dont think they can comprehend that maybe i love being a twin mum, maybe i find it rewarding and very challenging at the same time, maybe they both arent going to be naughty therefore double trouble doesnt apply ??




Hey! :)

Im not a Mummy of twins but used to be a Nanny for B/G twins! They were premmie bubs and started with them when they were bout 12 weeks old but about the size of a 4 week old!

Anyway I used to take them out and about a lot (with their Mum) in the begining. She would do the shopping or whatever and Id be pushing a BIG side by side twin pram and EVERY man and his dog would want to stop and have a look or ask a question! And I know what u mean by it getting VERY old VERY fast! LOL!

My fave Q's were "oh do you have 2 in there" (when we had a cover over the front):confused: No I just push around a big twin pram with one bub and my handbag in it! LOL

And... " Aww are they twins" No ones mine the other I stole from the hospital! OF COURSE THEY ARE TWINS! LOL

Oh and also..."Are they identical" Ah...NO one is a girl one is a boy! That one is dressed in pink and is fair and blonde that one in blue and has olive skin with dark hair! LOL

[twinmummee]

Can totally relate....we get it all the time, my fave would have to be "oh a boy and a girl" this is when both are dressed identically and head to toe in pink!!! Now I ask which one they think is a boy if i'm in a bad mood, if not i just reply no 2 girls and then find myself wondering which of my girls supposedly looks like a boy?!?:confused::confused:

If i'm in a hurry or just can't be bothered I just walk really fast and then start to feel guilty when I hear people go "oh look, twins..." as I whizz by!

The one that really hurts is "there's a lot of money in there" or "$8000, aren't you lucky" all referring to the baby bonus! One day I actually replied "it's $8500 actually, thanks for reminding me!" Yeah I decided to have twins to get double the baby bonus, as if!!

Here I thought it was bad enough when I was pg, that people (complete strangers) thought it was ok to ask about conception (IVF or natural)...

Ok, that's my rant over too - there's actually a Facebook group on the same thing!

As for the crying, I had days where I would sit on the floor with the girls and just bawl my eyes out...made me feel better to get it out. Am lucky though they are normally pretty good. Sometimes leaving them to cry is the best thing, especially if you are worked up yourself. And if you know they have been fed, they are clean and dry, not too hot or too cold there is really nothing else you can do for them if hugs don't work...wish I could help more!

Hope you have a better day :hugs::hugs::hugs:

Leanne

[Nomsie]

OH! I hate going shopping at the moment, because it takes 1 million times longer than it should due to everyone wanting to have a look and make comment! And when you're trying to LEAVE the shopping centre because the babies have had enough and you just need to get home- THAT is the time when everyone suddenly decides that they HAVE to talk to you! :mad: :no:
It's lovely that people show an interest in the babies, but if I look flustered or stressed or like I am a woman on a mission, please don't stop to chat to me. Chances are I still have to get the boys in the car, put the pram in the back and drive home with two screaming babies. I then have to get them out one by one and bring them inside, where I can really only console one at a time. I JUST WANT TO GET HOME! :hissy:

*breathe* Ahh... that's better! :)

And the crying.. someone in my birth group mentioned a theory the other day that babies, like us adults, just need to cry sometimes. They may be clean, well fed, not tired or anything- sometimes we just have that urge to cry. And that instead of trying to stop them from crying, we should just sit with them and let them know that it's ok to cry, and they will feel better afterwards. Not sure if that is the theory for me, but it may make you feel better! :)
And I agree with twinmummee- when both my guys are crying and I can't stop it, my theory is if you can't beat them, join them. I usually end up crying too! :o Oh well!

(And don't get me STARTED on the whole "are they a boy and a girl" thing- my boys are always in blue from head to toe- why would I subject my daughter to that? Obviously you are colourblind...)

[krystallxx]

haha you guys are funny!! i hate the ' oh a boy and a girl' when they are both in blue, just like nomsie said!! why the hell would i dress a girl in blue!! or ' jeez they are identical, are they identical?' well you just told me they were!!!
aha amie, yeh i get oh have u got two in there, i usually say yeh the other one is underneath, or in my bag!! ahha

had a bit better day today, thanks girls for making me feel a bit better too, and sharing your funny yet bloody annoying stories !!

:hugs:

[tigerteel]

Hi krystall!
I know exactly what you mean!The thing i have learnt is to use a sunshade so people cant see in the pram.Its so annoying having people gawk right in the pram and then stop you for half an hour going on about twins and how someone they know has twins blah blah.I know they are just trying to be nice but i wish they would realise that they are prob not the first to have stopped you that day and with two babies,ur very BUSY!The thing that gets to me is when people say ;oh a boy and girl,how lucky.....are they identical?.....................wtf.Even my partners brother asked us that question and i said ,u cant have identical boy/girl twins and he tried to argue with me about it.lol.dumb
I myself havnt had any comments about my age yet (20) but i do get the looks which are kinda upsetting but i get over it.
I think everyone has had days that you are describing wether they have 1,2,3 or more babies and it doesnt make you a bad mother for walking away and letting them cry so that you can calm down and get yourself together.Dont feel bad:hugs:
Having multiples is truly a blessing and i just wanted to say ladies.....gosh we are lucky!:cloud9:


Tennille:wave:

[FiveInTheBed]

gee you sound like "you have your hands full!''
;)
."bet they keep you busy?"..well yes they do, and this is the only spare five minutes I have to do the shopping, so sorry can't stop to chat..ciao!!

:hugs: totally understand...
it is tiring looking after two (or more little ones)...sleep deprivation seems to multiply everything too. (still a walking zombie at times).
...making sure they are safe in their cots, then walking slowly out around the back yard taking deep breathes can do wonders. give it a minute or two, and then attempt it again with a clear mind.

vent..vent and vent some more...it helps :D

(and sorry girls...but you can infact in rare circumstances have id g/b twins - if the mum releases an egg with an extra chromosone)
i didn't understand much about twins until i had them and read up.

:hugs:again.

[MummyCharmzy]

Hope you dont mind me posting here, I dont have twins but can relate to part of what you're saying... when #4 was born I was 20 and got SO many comments about being too young, having my hands full etc... it used to drive me crazy, how can people be so rude? I'm 23 now and we are expecting #5 and with the oldest two in school I only have the girls with me during the day, I still get the 'omg you've got your hands full' comments just with the two of them and every second person asks me if they are twins as they are so close in age (12 months) but size wise theres next to no difference anymore, they weigh the same etc.... that too drives me crazy feeling I have to explain myself everytime as a simple 'no they're not twins' always leads to more comments or questions about the age gap etc

Finally when my eldest came home from hospital he was 6 weeks old but only just 4lbs so every man and his dog wanted to stop and see him as he was 'the smallest baby ive ever seen' *yawn*

I'd hate to think what it would be like if I actually had twins!! it does get old fast and as someone suggested the sunshade, that sounds like an AWESOME idea and if its driving you as mad as it seems to be I really think that would help solve the problems as then no one will know 'who' is underneath!!

Wishing you some peace and sleepful nights soon! :)

[spoon]

Yes I use to get those comments and they drove me insane also, especially when it had taken me all day to get out of the house and I had no time to have a shower and had thrown my clothes on in a hurry and not even dragged a comb through my hair and then have people say stupid things like "oh gee, twins. they will keep your hands full":hair: I was not coping very well in the early days and I had no help, apart from my husband who worked all the time. But then as time went on and the girls got a little older and my toddler became easier to deal with, I started to enjoy them more and the comments became easier to brush off. In fact on one of my early bad days it was some kind lady's beautiful comment that started a change in my feelings. She grabbed my arm as I was walking past and said "you are such a lucky duck having three beatiful babies!" and she meant every single word of it and it made me shine so brightly:goodvibes::sunshine:

I noticed that it depended on my reaction back to them, as to how I would be left feeling. If someone says " you have your hands full" I say "yes i do" and think to myself how well I am doing and how lucky I am and how beautiful my life is. My happy responce makes them feel better too and I dont slow down for anyone now.

Hang in there, the novelty will wear off one day and you will be left alone. xxxx

[~Candy~]

I'm not a mum of twins...but my mum and my Aunty are identical twins..they are 64 and even now...when they go out together they are constantly pulled up and get the :ecomcity:...lol

[Bex]

OMG.

Im not a twin mother but saw this thread and had to post. I had three in 2.5 years. I have a valco twin with toddler seat. Everywhere We go people stare and comment.

You feel like a freak show or something. It don't get it though 3 is not that many kids its about average.

We get.

You got ur hands full. No actually my hands are quite free thats what the stroller for lol.

Your Keen. Well yes i am actually thats why I had them.

Thats a tribe. No actually its not if this was a tribe we would be laughed at by the other tribes for only having 5 members haha.

That must keep you busy. Nah we just let them run wild out the back with the dogs and sleep and party all day and night.

Are the boys twins. Ow yes I just held my legs shut for 14 months until I felt like having the second one.

Also the people that think because you have kids you are going to stop and talk to them for half an hour while they ask you about just about everything in your life. I sometimes feel like saying I am weary pink undies today. Do you also want to know what I ate for beakfast a week from yesterday.

Now days I just "yep" and keep on moving alot. lol

On the walking away from crying thing. Anyone who ses they have never done it is either super woman or lying. Its better to walk away than shake your baby or something. It everyday pushed to far mummas who do that not crazy people. I found walking away shutting yourself in the bathroom or somewhere by yourself and screaming works great. lol

[mum2bubba]

Ok, well I am very sorry if I have ever commented on your twins at the shops I really am just fascinated by them, I will try hard not to say anything anymore. ;):o

My sister and I are 19 months apart, when we were younger my mum dressed us the same pretty much all the time, we even had a twin pram. My parents had quite a few people ask my parents if we were twins (we looked similar back then), I have even had a few people ask if my own kids are twins. They are 1 and 4:confused:. I was walking down the street the other day and had the girls in the tandem pram and two ladies were outside their house talking when I walked passed one lady said to the other "look, twins" Um...no they're not, look closer. I know not all twins look the same (fraternal twins) but Skye is a small 1-year-old and Hayley is a tall 4-year old.

Anyway...