How much up time does your bub have?

[mum2bee]

Hi Ladies,

I need some guidance in regards to how much up time a 9 week old should be having, I watch closely for his sleep signals but always seem to stuff it up, usually I am too early I think. I am trying to get him to self settle a little rather than being rocked to sleep, and am not brave enough to let him cry for too long, so if I could hit the nail on the head in regards to up time, it would reduce the amount of stress for both of us.

Thanks heaps everyone!

[OurLittleBlessing]

Hi mum2bee,

I find that if I wait for my DD's tired signals, it is often too late, and she will much more of a fuss than if I put her to bed before (tricky I know....)

At 9 weeks she couldn't handle much more than an hour all up including feeding, so when it came close to an hour, I would change her nappy if I hadn't already, and pop her into bed awake. She would grizzle for a few minutes max and then drift off to sleep. Often she wouldn't grizzle at all. I think by the time she was showing tired signals, she was overstimulated, because it would take her a lot longer to settle. It was just a matter of trial and error until I found the right time.

Even now at 12.5 weeks, she can only last up to 1 hour and 20 minutes, but she does go to bed quite happily and 'chat's to herself for a few minutes before falling asleep.

I hope that is a help! Good luck, I'm sure we all understand how stressful it is when they are hard to settle.

[fire~fly]

ethan starts to show tired signs when hes been up for 1hr 15mins. hes 12 weeks now, but has been like this since he was only a couple weeks old. I can tell when hes getting tired because he does a certain whinge/cry that i know very well. as soon as he does this i know hes ready to go down. sometimes he will do a yawn first or the cry, but as soon as he does either, i wrap him and put him in his cot with his cuddly. he snuggles up to it, sometimes sucks on it, might have a little bit of a whinge and talk to himself for a few minutes, but he will go to sleep pretty easily.

i know its not nice to listen to our bubs cry, but can you tell the difference between your bubs emotional cry or if its just a winding down-protesting going to sleep cry? once i worked this out, it was very easy to get him to self settle.

[mum2bee]

Thanks Ladies.

I think what the problem might be is the dummy, he cries everytime it comes out when he is sleeping. He doesn't have the dummy overnight just during the day, so i know that he can transition from one sleep cycle to the next at night. Maybe I should just bite the bullet and remove the dummy, seems to be causing me more stress and crying than what it is worth. How long do you think I should try without the dummy, how long does it take to create a new habit?

[OurLittleBlessing]

I had the same experience with the dummy too. I have nothing against dummy's, just find that they don't work very well for my DD. I was constantly putting it back in.

They say it takes about 3 days to form a new 'habit', although after 1 day I was starting to notice a bit of an improvement.

I still use the dummy when we are in the pram, or I am somewhere where I would like her to be quiet ie, church, meetings, quiet restuarant... but she doesn't have it in her cot anymore.

I didn't give her the dummy at all though while I was getting her used to not having it for sleeps. Does that all make sense!?!?! lol

Let us know how you go!

[fire~fly]

mum2bee ~ i had that exact same problem when ds1 was a baby. i was getting up ALL night to put the stupid dummy back in for him!! One day when he was about 3 months i just decided enough was enough so i threw his dummys in the bin, getting him to go to sleep that first nap was the hardest, took about 15 mins of patting and singing (he wasnt self settling at that stage) to get him to sleep, but after that it was like he had forgotten all about it! :yelclap:
now with ds2 if i give him the dummy (which he doesnt take anyway!) its only if we are in the shops and he is crying or if i am trying to stretch out the time between feeds... i will never give it to him to aid him going to sleep because i saw the problems it caused ds1.
Maybe if you are taking the dummy off bub, introduce a cuddly/blankie instead? when i put ethan to bed swaddled, i just put the edge of his cuddly over his shoulder so he can turn his head and snuggle into it and suck on it if he wants. he loves it!

[Lahri]

Our little one is now 3 months old, or just over, and she sleeps for about 40 minutes at a time during the day. She normally has a feed when she wakes up, then plays for about 1-2 hours then has a sleep. It does depend though and some days she feeds and goes back to sleep again. Today she slept for 3 hours and then was awake for 5 so it really does vary and each baby will differ.

Sorry not much help, but I also found the dummy wasn't really helping. I hate the things but whilst in England but dh's family gave her a dummy :no: it did help her with day time sleeps though. She doesn't have it at night and I know she can sleep during the day without it. Each to their own though.

[mum2bee]

Morning,

Well today will be the third day without the dummy....it's not going too bad, takes me awhile to get him to sleep. Although he still isn't sleeping through the sleep cycles during the day, I have decided that if I try to resettle for 5 min and he hasn't gone back to sleep or is looking like going back to sleep, I am just going to get him up. I originally tried to get him to sleep through till the next feed eg. feed upon waking, up for 1.5 hours and sleep for 2.5 hours but that just isn't working. Unlike my daughter who is 18 months old, I will just let DS take the lead and I will follow....just hope it works, it is not like me at all !!

Thanks for all your advice and support, hopefully after a few more days, things will have settled down.

Will keep you updated!:)