Shopping and kids. Bloody over it!!!

[MyFourCubs]

So bloody over taking my kids shopping.:mad: Yesterday I had Alex throw the most ginormous of tantrums int the middle of Coles because I made him get in the pram. Otherwise he was running all over Coles with people running into him. Then we had sheer hysteria because he saw a Thomas DVD at the check out that he wanted- we have the same DVD at home! I was so embarrassed I was trying to gert the hell out of there and forgot my shopping!:rolleyes:

Today we went to Aldi- same screaming over alex being made to sit int trolley- for the same reason as Coles except even more so as aisles are narrower and people were tripping over him. So he is screaming and then Hannah starts up- hysteria for no reason whatsoever. Every person in the shop was staring at me although I was trying not to look. At one stage I swear I wanted to deck the both of them. (and the people looking at us!):o The horrid girl at check out didn't even give me a hello- never made eye contact and instead sat with a look of utter contempt on her face as she put through my groceries- basically throwing them at me although i ahd Hannah on my hip and had only one hand to pack the trolley. i know it's ALDI but SHEESH!:rolleyes:

I just want to give them both away atm. Anybody want a almost 3 year old and an 18mth old? I could do a package deal!!!

[pinkgingham]

i have nearly the same age gap. and my DS has been pretty shocking lately too. i like aldis though because there is really only one way to go, i go on days its not busy and because i know what i want already i can be in and out really quickly, he doesnt even have time to have a tantrum over anything. i also bribe him and i know i shouldnt but its better than the tantrums. in the first part of aldi where you walk in, well at mine, they have those pringle like chips, and i just grab one of those and open it and let him walk with it while eating them. keeps him quite.

i wish i had advice, can you leave them with your DH on the weekend while you go do shopping? i like to go grocery shopping as soon as i get paid which is a monday so i have no choice to take them with me. but if it gets any worse than it is now, then i will have to consider waiting til the weekend when his dad comes and picks the both of them up so i can do it then when i am alone.

[UmmInayah]

Man, I really feel for you! I hate when people stare too, you can tell they're thinking you're the worst mum, even though you've done nothing wrong!

Could you maybe keep him distracted by getting him to help with the shopping items? Like ask him what type of apples he wants to get, maybe give him a list with pictures of all the stuff he has to remember (sense of responsibility - keeps his mind off throwing tantrums) and if he's super during that time, maybe offer to give him a treat at home - maybe 10 mins of your undivided attention (no cooking, cleaning, nothing; have someone take care of your other children and just what HE wants, as a reward (within house rule limits - ie if one of your rules no jumping on the bed, he can't do that)? Doesn't have to be food related. lol)

As for the 18 month old, I usually take something along for her to snack on.. sultanas are great. Or even a toy I haven't had in her rotation for a while..

All children are different and as time consuming as it can be to have to create little things for them to do, it sometimes pays off :)

[kayla Lilyz mum]

U poor thing, i understand how u feel it can be so humiliating and worse when ppl stare and make comments! One time i was shopping and we went down the lolly aisle and DD started making a scene coz she wanted me to buy her something, well this lady walks past and shes like thats so funny and cute and was laughing?? i was like wtf, CUTE??? here i am, feel like pulling my hair out coz shes been whinging the whole way around the supermarket and apparently its cute, i was furious! Obviously doesn't have kids! :hair:

[UmmInayah]

U poor thing, i understand how u feel it can be so humiliating and worse when ppl stare and make comments! One time i was shopping and we went down the lolly aisle and DD started making a scene coz she wanted me to buy her something, well this lady walks past and shes like thats so funny and cute and was laughing?? i was like wtf, CUTE??? here i am, feel like pulling my hair out coz shes been whinging the whole way around the supermarket and apparently its cute, i was furious! Obviously doesn't have kids! :hair:

LOL maybe she was trying to make light of it? Make you feel better and not try and put YOU down because of it?

[DQ]

I feel your pain :banghead:

I have just come home from the shops where I was SUPPOSED to get some things for dinner and generally the weekend.

My 10 year old son (who is going through the worst possible attitude phase of all time) threw a tanty because I wouldn't buy him a playstation game that was worth $95 :eek:

So then DD1 decided to chuck a wobbly too because I had upset her big brother (who she is very close to) :hair:

So needless to say I walked in there with a list of things to get, and walked back out without getting anything :banghead:

*Note to self* NEVER take all 5 kids shopping at the same time :hissy:

[kayla Lilyz mum]

LOL maybe she was trying to make light of it? Make you feel better and not try and put YOU down because of it?
Yeah maybe, but she just seemed like she was being smart, i didn't get the ' i feel for u vibe'...:laughing:

[SassyMummy]

I only have 1, but she can embarrass the life out of me when we're out. I don't have car, so it's not as simple as "okay, that's it, we're going home!" and leaving. I need her to stop so she doesn't scream the bus down. It's so annoying and humiliating.

Especially when you're "just ignoring it," and people look at you as if you're such a horrible mother, because you're ignoring your kid's cries. It's a bit different from ignoring a newborn (and even then, when newborns scream cos they need a nappy change, the quickest way to solve the problem is to ignore them and head as quickly as you can to the parents room - it's not ignoring for the sake of it, it's ignoring so they can be dealt with quicker!).

[pinkgingham]

you know what i do when out in public and my DS is having a tantie, i just laugh it off most times. i mean when its a full on tantie. or the other day i started making a whiney whingey noise sort of mimicing what he was doing. :laughing: he didnt like it and cried harder but because i tried to laugh it off, it made it easier to deal with. i really dont care about other people anymore. at the end of the day, i'm raising them and not some stranger in the supermarket aisle that probably doesnt have any kids themselves. i think i just got over caring what people though about me and my kids tantrums when out.

[munchie]

ohh i cant wait for my baby to turn into a toddler, sounds like fun

[Benji]

I only have 1, but she can embarrass the life out of me when we're out. I don't have car, so it's not as simple as "okay, that's it, we're going home!" and leaving. I need her to stop so she doesn't scream the bus down. It's so annoying and humiliating.

Especially when you're "just ignoring it," and people look at you as if you're such a horrible mother, because you're ignoring your kid's cries. It's a bit different from ignoring a newborn (and even then, when newborns scream cos they need a nappy change, the quickest way to solve the problem is to ignore them and head as quickly as you can to the parents room - it's not ignoring for the sake of it, it's ignoring so they can be dealt with quicker!).

Ditto!

Except I do have a car, boy I feel for you :crying:



My boy is going through a horrible phase (I HOPE it's a phase) ATM and I really can't go to the shops. I mean I can't even DO weekly groceries any more! I have to duck in and duck out daily because of his horribleness!!

My mum keeps telling me "well I had to stop taking you to the shops for quite a while when you were young" but it's like AARGH I'm a single mum if I can't go to the shops, we don't eat!!!

I hate it when people turn around and look at DS when he's throwing a tanty because I make a point of ignoring the tantrums and he thrives on the attention so everyone who was at West Lakes mall yesterday a big NER NER to you and thanks a lot for making the trip horrendus for me :raspberry:

[Shananaaah]

I just want to give them both away atm. Anybody want a almost 3 year old and an 18mth old? I could do a package deal!!!

I threaten this all the time - my girlfriends and I all have 18 month olds, and we're sure we can get a package deal somewhere!

Then I think it would just be easier to put MYSELF in a cardboard box on the front lawn with "Free to Good Home" sign...

I always wish I had the courage to be like that woman on the ad who throws herself on the ground and has a tanty when her kid does.

I'm sure I'll do it eventually.... we haven't even hit the Terrible Twos yet.

[Teley]

Package deal? Sounds good:D. The more children in the household the merrier:D.

So, what are you sending it over Sara?

My advice is: stuff the people who are looking at you. Children have tantrums. End of story. If they don't like it they can vacate the building and stop shopping there:p. (Or give you a hand at something, has anyone ever thought of that:rolleyes:).

:hugs::hugs:I feel your pain, you should see my Alex at a shopping centre. I just love getting stares at, honestly, it's just like being a celebrity lol.

[fox_girl]

My DD isnt so bad now. But going through the terrible 2's and early 3's it was horrible. One day she was screaming and having the biggest tantie out of frustration she got a smack on the arm, not hard but it shocked her and she screamed really loud.
Some old lady maybe in her 60's turned around and said that is no way to treat a child, my god you look like a child yourself (i was 20 or 21 which shouldn't matter anyway) you should never hit your child.
I turned to her and said - Who the *?@$ do you think you are to be telling me how i should raise MY child and call me a child myself. Keep your opinion to yourself you old bag. And i walked off.
A few ppl had stopped and were looking, but more so at the shock of what she had said to me.

Some ppl just think they know it all and are the best parents out there and when they go shopping there kids dont throw tanties.

[Lil Mamma]

I feel ya! My kids are around the same age (17months & 2.5yo), and they are constantly setting eachother off. I find that as long as I bring a drink bottle & some sortof snack I will be right for about 20mins :laughing:

At home they are quite good & I can usually control them, but when we are out they are constantly whining & taking things off the shelf. And then when I tell them to put it back, or take it from them they will have a tantrum.

If my 2.5yo spots the apples, Im in trouble, he always manages to swipe one & take a bite before I even notice. I once put a 1/2 a watermelon in the back of the trolley with him & once we got to the checkout I'd noticed he'd taken the plastic off and poked holes all over it :hair:

[Loopy Linda]

sara i feel your pain!

once while shopping with kieran i hadn't even got to woolies yet, still walking through shopping centre and i wouldn't hire one of those kiddie cabs for him...well i needed to do a weeks shopping, basket on them can't hold all my shopping, and i can't push that and trolley.

so he starts the loudest most ear piercing squeal. i must have turned the brightest red. i stood my ground and again told him he isn't having it, i asked him to come with me but he stood there screaming. so i walked off.

i was in his sight the whole time, and he was in my hearing range... and msot of the state too!

everyone must have looked at him then me.

about 4 shops away one old bitty muttered something jsut too quiet for me to fully catch, but i knew what she meant

so i turned on her and said " yeah and if i smacked his **** you'd have the police here that fast wouldn't you!" and i kept going.

little turd as i turned a corner got a shock mum was gone, shut up and ran after me! grr that old bitty, and grrr my feral kid

[Pax]

I am over parenting toddlers, but obviously i will have to do it one more time *sigh*

this time i am getting one of those leashes ... i will drag the little bugger if i have to.. :laughing:

[MrsMiggins]

Does it help to know I am in the same boat?? (And that my kids are pretty much the same age as yours!!) I find myself wishing that the supermarkets here in QLD were open til midnight like when I lived in Canberra. How odd that an hour or two of lazily cruising the supermarket aisles without interruption seems like heaven to me!!

Just once, I would love to be able to have a look at 3 different things in Kmart without having to battle with DS chucking the world's biggest tantrum because he is refusing to sit in the stroller/trolley and wants "OUT!!! MUMMY!!! OUT!!!! MUMMY!!!!!!" I would love to be able to do the groceries and manage to get everything on my list before I was forced to leave with a half-full trolley because the kids behaviour had degenerated to a point where it had become impossible to continue shopping.

Just once, I would like to be able to walk past Wendy's/the bakery/donut king/etc without two separate tantrums over not being allowed to have a milkshake/bread roll/donut etc.

I would love to take a leisurely look through several different shops then sit down to treat myself to a cup of coffee and a scone before heading off to Coles to do the groceries.

Ahhhh.... only a couple more years til the kids are at school!!! :D

[SEA]

[quote=MyThreeCubs;3181955] Every person in the shop was staring at me although I was trying not to look. At one stage I swear I wanted to deck the both of them. (and the people looking at us!):o quote]

This what really annoys me when my kids have their tanty, is when people just stare! What no other kid in the whole world has ever thrown a tanty in a shop before? Please....yeah I know exactly how you feel and yes I have felt like doing the same :D

[Loopy Linda]

I
this time i am getting one of those leashes ... i will drag the little bugger if i have to.. :laughing:

i tried this with my handful! he sat on the ground screaming and refused to budge! at very best he crawled a few steps screaming... looked like a beaten dog, i had to take it off again.

[farmmummy]

I am sooo glad that I am not the only one...that is I know i'm not the only one but its nice to read that other people have the same issues.
My DD is about to turn 3 and the best way to deal with her is food while where shopping and helpping with unloading the trolly. I've only been out once since I've had DS.
Just before I had DS I was in Wollies at the check out. Mil had let Sarah play in the playground just outside and then paid for a $2 ride both of which I never do. Then DD wanted to go back in to the playground and MIL said no. Well DD started and because she was tiered was twice as bad.
The woman in the checkout behind me goes "What a little Sh!t. If she was mind I'd just leave her" I told her it doesn't always work like that. as I was thinking that in such a large shopping centre you never know who is prowling around and it would be my luck she'd run away.
DD then started throwing her arms about and trying to hit out at MIL. The woman noticed this and then goes "She's trying to hit her mother!" i eventually got this dumb woman to realise that I was her mum and that it was MIL carring her. Her face was priceless and she just goes "Oh! Sorry" She didn't know what to say really. But I've had heaps of doozies latley and hoping things get better soon because I'm not enjoying being stuck at home all the time.

I do agree tho I hate it when people look at you like your a bad person.

Thanks for listening.

[BeautifulBoys]

So bloody over taking my kids shopping.:mad: Yesterday I had Alex throw the most ginormous of tantrums int the middle of Coles because I made him get in the pram. Otherwise he was running all over Coles with people running into him. Then we had sheer hysteria because he saw a Thomas DVD at the check out that he wanted- we have the same DVD at home! I was so embarrassed I was trying to gert the hell out of there and forgot my shopping!:rolleyes:

Today we went to Aldi- same screaming over alex being made to sit int trolley- for the same reason as Coles except even more so as aisles are narrower and people were tripping over him. So he is screaming and then Hannah starts up- hysteria for no reason whatsoever. Every person in the shop was staring at me although I was trying not to look. At one stage I swear I wanted to deck the both of them. (and the people looking at us!):o The horrid girl at check out didn't even give me a hello- never made eye contact and instead sat with a look of utter contempt on her face as she put through my groceries- basically throwing them at me although i ahd Hannah on my hip and had only one hand to pack the trolley. i know it's ALDI but SHEESH!:rolleyes:

I just want to give them both away atm. Anybody want a almost 3 year old and an 18mth old? I could do a package deal!!!


:no:No thanks....same probs here I try to avoid shopping with DS1..DS2 is easy hes nearly months old...so I agree with you.

[MyFourCubs]

i tried this with my handful! he sat on the ground screaming and refused to budge! at very best he crawled a few steps screaming... looked like a beaten dog, i had to take it off again.
:laughing::laughing: Me too! Exactly the same thing!!! i got one of those backpacks with the tail you hold on to and that's exactly what both Alex and Hannah do- the little @#*&@#

:smiliedance::smiliedance: Oh thank God I'm not alone, seriously I was really feeling like it was just me and thta I must be the worst mother around- hopelessly incompetent! I am soooooooooooooo releieved that it isn't just me, (or maybe we are all totally incompetent lol.)

I ams eriously considering getting them both portable DVD players for at the shops and they are in the pram- anybody tried this? We ahd one when we went on holidays and it was a lifesaver. Can imagine what the old biddies would say about it though, honestly my MIL thinks tv in general is a product of lazy parenting. The other week I bought them a packet of potato chips in Big W because I was going to seriously kill them both, I was that desperate to shut them up and I was so embarrassed about the chips I hid them in the top of the pram so nobody would see them and smuggled them to them one at a time!:o

[MrsMiggins]

We have a DVD player in the car (yes, I agree - it is a lifesaver!!) but I've never thought of putting one in the pram!!!

[Loopy Linda]

lol dh seen the jeep pram with the ipod connection and built in speakers. he was in love, but he wanted to add a dvd player to it!

[MyFourCubs]

for the kids or for him? lol.....

[Loopy Linda]

most likely him! we took the portable dvd player away on holidays and he packed some of hsi movies! i was like what for, it is for the kids... he had hoped to get a seat in the back and con them into watching his rubbish! as if i am your bl00dy chauffeur!

[MyFourCubs]

:laughing::laughing::laughing: what a cheek!