Not sure-help me decide

[cocobambino]

I am having a baby boy :yelclap:

DH is dead against circumsition and im undecided I wanna hear from pro and anti i wanna hear good and bad i wanna make a decision do i put my foot down and say yes im getting him done or do i not get it done

Please help

[NibbleCurlynBub]

Well... DO YOU want to get it done? :confused:

If you don't or don't mind either way then just let sleeping dogs lie and worry about something else..

[cocobambino]

what i dont want is him getting infections

[NibbleCurlynBub]

So you DO want to? :confused:

[westerner]

As long as you teach him to wash it and you give him a bath/shower each day then he shouldnt get anymore infections than your daughters do..

[sunnyflower]

My son is not circumcised.
He has been taught how to wash it properly.

He has never had an infection.:)

[Areca]

Your DH is a smart man.

My DH is a 27 year old intact male and has never had a problem with infections...he hasn't had a single one.

Really, I think you should do some research on the topic. If you go back through old posts you'll find plenty of information.

[JabberJaw]

Ummm my son has never had an infection, he is almost 5. He was born with foreskin for a reason, so leave it be unless of course it needs to be removed for medical reasons.

Once you take it, its gone forever and there is not really any need to cause any unnecessary pain....Its not really your foreskin, so why not let your son decide when he is old enough.

Circumcision is becoming an outdated unnecessary procedure and 81% + of Australian males have it intact.

[Pregnor]

I would assume there is a higher risk of a more serious infection from the actual circumcision. As someone said before, my DF is 24 and has never had an infection.

I am not going to consider getting it done unless there is a problem.

I also hear that it is actually very difficult to find a doctor who will still perform them... I would say that is a fairly good indication of whether or not you should have it done!

[Mamalicious]

You don't need to circumcise for your son to have a clean penis. :)

My ex tried that one on me, and it's kinda gross lol...I mean...you'd hope they'd still wash it! :barf::laughing:

Just teach him good personal hygiene, same as with your DD's, and your hubby will know about willy cleaning so he can teach him most of it! :D

[PrestonPie]

I'm not sure you're going to get the most objective opinions here. it seems like people are either ALL for or ALL against it.
try researching it on the net. you can look up www.circumcision.com.au (http://www.circumcision.com.au) for a 'pro' information site and google others i guess. that's probably the best way to get medically based information rather than personal opinions on the subject.
for the record we had our baby boy done at 8 weeks and if we have another, he'll be done too. i did the research and made an informed decision.
hope that helps.

[Jakois]

I agree with what the others have said.
Both my boys are still "Intact". Neither of them have ever had any kind of infection (they are 8 & 13 yrs old).

IMO It really is a very outdated, unnecessary procedure:(.
The procedure itself carries a risk (however minute you may think it is).

Is the risk of infection the ONLY reason you are considering
Circ'ing??

[bronnie1211]

If i have a boy i think i will try to get him circumcised. My ex boyfriend got and infection whenhe was 20 and needed to be circumcised and it was quite a big surgery. If he had been sircumcised as a baby he wouldn't have gotten the infection.

DP said if we have a boy he will be circumcised because its easier to clean.

[Kirstlea]

My DH is 40yrs old and has never had an infection in his life.

To be honest the whole conversation about our DS was me saying "do we get him circumcised?" and DH said "what for":eek: My reply was I thought it was the norm:shame:

So that was it:laughing: Our son can sort it out himself if he wants to later.

Why fix something that doesn't need fixing.

[Fuchsia!]

If you are worried about infections and that is your only reason then i wouldn't circ (i wouldn't circ for any reason though :p)

Would you take his tonsils out incase he may get tonsilitis? Would you remover his appendix in case he gets appendicitus?

If he gets an infection, cross that bridge when you get there.

We as women have infections all the time, we are prone to thrush, urine infections, but we learn to deal with them when the time comes and i would never imagine removing those parts because of it.

My reasons not to circ as follows.

*its not my skin to take off
* i would never put my baby through that pain and anxiety
* YOu are possibly taking away some sexual pleasure he is entitled too
* Its risky, on tiny little stuff up can ruin him for life. We know how emotional men are about their penises
* He will be in the minority
* Its totally un necessary
*once its gone, its gone. You are modifying him and its not your right

[Kirstlea]

Just wanted to add that because I am not a male I have to trust my husbands thoughts on this as only he can know the pros and cons.

Its a bit like us trying to tell our husbands what being pregnant is like or have af pain etc. They can not possibly know because they will never experience it, like we can never know the the experience of circumcision or no circumcision.

Just another angle to think over:)

[FiveInTheBed]

I say, search through the pro, anti and discuss it threads and then go with your gut feeling!!

[PunkyDiva]

Kirstlea...I can sorta understand where you're coming from, but, prob not a good analogy, one is surgically modifying a baby whilst the other is a natural part of life.

A man who was c'd from birth cannot possibly know both sides and vice versa.


do i put my foot down and say yes im getting him done

If DH put his foot down and said your DD's had to be c'd, how would that make you feel ? It's a relationship and both sides matter when it comes to making parenting decisions.

I'm very strongly against and do consider it unecessary unless there is extreme, present medical reason for it.

I've only one friend to have her boy "done" and he has suffered a lot of urinary tract probs resulting in more surgery. Co-incidence ?? who knows.

Google some forums of grown up men talking of their resentment for parents who did c them as bubs for another side to the c'ing debate.

On a positive note a research study in Africa?? on Aids, the men were offered c's as it emerged that it did contribute to prevention BUT again it is also education on safe sex and hygeine.

[Lil Mamma]

I agree with the earlier comment that you are not going to get an objective answer on this forum - you are better off doing your own research and deciding for yourself.

I am not saying you should circ, but Id like to inform you of the other side of some of the comments mentioned in this thread.

There are lots of men who have never had infections, and there are also lots who have and have had to undergo surgery. There are mums (some on this forum as well) who have had to have their young boys circumcised after they experienced excruciating pain due to problems with the foreskin.

As for sexual pleasure, there are plenty of studies finding that circumcision slightly increases sexual pleasure, and plenty which find that circumcision slightly decreases sexual pleasure. This really isn't an issue - circumcised men don't have any problems when it comes to sex. In fact, a lot of women prefer circumcised penises because of aesthetics, odour and cleanliness. Then again, plenty of women couldn't care less either way.

As for statistics, while it is true that more boys in Australia are not circumcised than those who are, in the US it is close to 50/50.

Even if you feel that circ would be the right decision, you probably shouldn't if your hubby doesnt agree, its a decision you should make as a couple.

All the best :)

[Milliner]

Thirty years ago, up to 90% of American newborn baby boys were circumcised; currently, around 60% are circumcised. On the west coast, this figure has gone as low as 40%, and in parts of Canada, 25% and less. Worldwide, the uncircumcised penis is clearly the norm: 85% of the world's male population are "intact"

Lower chance of urinary tract infection (UTI) in first year of life - UTIs are rare in boys and are easily treated.

Cleanliness - Simple education about good hygiene virtually eliminates this risk. Really, it's not that hard

Prevention of a more complicated circumcision later in life - Phimosis and other penile conditions requiring circumcision are not very common and not generally considered a valid reason for routine circumcision.

Why remove a part of an infant's body that functions perfectly well? Circumcision interferes with the way nature intended the body to be.

As with any surgery, risks are involved, including excessive bleeding, infections or injury to the penis. There are also cosmetic concerns, as the foreskin can be cut too long or too short or can heal improperly. And in rare cases it may even cause death.

Studies show infants experience substantial pain from the procedure, as shown by increased heart rate and blood pressure; the "memory" of the pain lasts, as infants circumcised without analgesia have increased sensitivity to vaccinations at four months.

Why not wait until the boy has the chance to choose for himself? Subjecting an infant to an unnecessary surgery that will change his body is unfair.

It's such a huge decision and at the end of the day it's not your penis. Respect your son and let him choose if he wants his body permanently altered 'just in case'



The inner foreskin possesses a greater density of nerve endings. It is thought to be more erogenous than even the glans. The is no question that the foreskin is a highly erogenous tissue. This tremendous amount of sensitivity is lost completely when the forefold of the skin system is amputated. In addition to this, the most sensitive part of the penis, the frenulum of the foreskin, is either partially or totally removed in most infant circumcisions. The frenulum is the continuation of the inner foreskin which attaches to the underside (ventral part) of the glans. Thus, a significant percentage, if not the majority, of erogenous nerve supply to the penis is removed in circumcision at birth.

Taken from http://www.cirp.org/library/anatomy/garcia/

[epiphany]

Circumcision doesn't remove the need for good hygiene routines & doesn't necessarily remove the risk of infection - both my brothers are circ'ed & one had a lot of problems with infection & other issues when he was a teenager (he is also strongly resentful that he was circumcised). Likewise, all the intact men I know (incl my hubby & son) have never had any issues with poor hygiene or infections.

Good luck with whatever decision you & hubby make together & good luck on the birth of your precious wee son.

[gentlemama]

The question sounds something like this to me..
Should I surgically remove part of my newborn child's genitals or not? Cutting healthy tissue off without a demonstrable cause? No thanks. Leave it alone unless there's real evidence of a need to intervene. Cutting off foreskins to prevent penile infections is a bit like removing the baby's toes to prevent ingrown toenails.

[Kirstlea]

Kirstlea...I can sorta understand where you're coming from, but, prob not a good analogy, one is surgically modifying a baby whilst the other is a natural part of life.

A man who was c'd from birth cannot possibly know both sides and vice versa.

:laughing::laughing: Your right its not a very good analogy but you got my drift. I was trying to get across that we females will never know whats it like because of the obvious reason.

To the OP if your DH is dead set against it I think you should respect his wishes.

There is heaps of research but I think sometimes it can confuse the issues even more. Even though this is totally off the topic there is research that says its good eat chocolate and other research thats says it is not. I think people need to look at their instincts more and trust their own judgement.

At the end of the day you really can't go against the father of your baby that just doesn't give you a good start with your new family. There are enough pressures on a relationship with a new baby without adding more;)

[Frany]

I'm not sure you're going to get the most objective opinions here. it seems like people are either ALL for or ALL against it.
try researching it on the net. you can look up www.circumcision.com.au (http://www.circumcision.com.au) for a 'pro' information site and google others i guess. that's probably the best way to get medically based information rather than personal opinions on the subject.
for the record we had our baby boy done at 8 weeks and if we have another, he'll be done too. i did the research and made an informed decision.
hope that helps.
I just wanted to point out, you are probably not going to get any real unbiased medical info from that site. It is set up by a doctor that profits from circumcision. :barf:

I have never seen any evidence to suggest it is a good thing to do. Many of the opinions you will hear here are from very well informed women who have done extensive research on the topic. HTH :)

[cocobambino]

DH is really against it, so im gonna go with him and not get him done.

[PunkyDiva]

Even though this is totally off the topic there is research that says its good eat chocolate

That research is spot on, life without chocolate:no: sends shivers up me spine.:D

[neostudded]

I have a 14 month old son, I left him intact.

There are lots of reason's, some of them people have mentioned but I will say a few more. :)

Since no national medical association on earth endorses routine circumcision, it is cosmetic surgery.

Every mammal on earth evolved a foreskin before there was surgery, soap, or even running water. The natural penis is as self-cleaning as the vagina.

Surgery in infancy is not the best time. The foreskin is still fused to the glans like fingernails to a nail bed. Surgery can (and does) go wrong.

Everything is so tiny, any small error is magnified as the child grows. The doctor has no idea how the child will grow or how much slack skin he will need or want.

The foreskin is the best part of the penis, with over half the sensual nerve endings. Without the foreskin, the glans are likely to get numbed, natural frictionless rolling/gliding mode of stimulation is lost.

Good luck.

[Roopee]

I agree with the earlier comment that you are not going to get an objective answer on this forum - you are better off doing your own research and deciding for yourself.

I am not saying you should circ, but Id like to inform you of the other side of some of the comments mentioned in this thread.

There are lots of men who have never had infections, and there are also lots who have and have had to undergo surgery. There are mums (some on this forum as well) who have had to have their young boys circumcised after they experienced excruciating pain due to problems with the foreskin.

As for sexual pleasure, there are plenty of studies finding that circumcision slightly increases sexual pleasure, and plenty which find that circumcision slightly decreases sexual pleasure. This really isn't an issue - circumcised men don't have any problems when it comes to sex. In fact, a lot of women prefer circumcised penises because of aesthetics, odour and cleanliness. Then again, plenty of women couldn't care less either way.

As for statistics, while it is true that more boys in Australia are not circumcised than those who are, in the US it is close to 50/50.

Even if you feel that circ would be the right decision, you probably shouldn't if your hubby doesnt agree, its a decision you should make as a couple.

All the best :)
Sorry but I do have to reply to the parts I highlighted.....................

The mums you speak of are in the very small minority. Infection in an uncirc'd penis isn't a prominent issue in our society.

Please- could you post the studies that say it 'increases' sexual pleasure? It would be interetsing to read especially seeing as it is a well known fact that removing the foreskin removes nerve endings- I'm struggling ti understand how this can increase sexual pleasure.

Odour? Cleanliness? and Asthetics- it is not about the women, this is about removing skin from our baby boys- skin that is meant to be there! And as for Odour..well thats a little insulting, my boys doodles dont smell. and the cleanliness issue- it has been said here before by someone 'a dirty doodle is a dirty doodle regardless of it's 'status'. An uncirc'd penis needs about as much attention as a big toe.

The US's stats are completey irrelevant here, they have a higher rate of jewish people who do belive in RIC.




DH is really against it, so im gonna go with him and not get him done.

Good for you- you've made the right decision- there is no need to remove healthy skin- you wouldn't go lopping his ears off in case he had an ear infection. Well done to you!!:flowerz:

[Lil Mamma]

Sorry but I do have to reply to the parts I highlighted.....................

The mums you speak of are in the very small minority. Infection in an uncirc'd penis isn't a prominent issue in our society.

Please- could you post the studies that say it 'increases' sexual pleasure? It would be interetsing to read especially seeing as it is a well known fact that removing the foreskin removes nerve endings- I'm struggling ti understand how this can increase sexual pleasure.

Odour? Cleanliness? and Asthetics- it is not about the women, this is about removing skin from our baby boys- skin that is meant to be there! And as for Odour..well thats a little insulting, my boys doodles dont smell. and the cleanliness issue- it has been said here before by someone 'a dirty doodle is a dirty doodle regardless of it's 'status'. An uncirc'd penis needs about as much attention as a big toe.

The US's stats are completey irrelevant here, they have a higher rate of jewish people who do belive in RIC.





Good for you- you've made the right decision- there is no need to remove healthy skin- you wouldn't go lopping his ears off in case he had an ear infection. Well done to you!!:flowerz:

No :no:, I won't respond to this post. My post is clearly a response to the OP's post and clearly a discussion, not a debate with anyone. I do not appreciate having my words twisted and I am not the slightest bit interested in having a debate with you.

Hopefully the mod's will close this thread now that the OP's question has been answered and she has come to a decision.

[Roopee]

I didnt twist your words at all, quite the contrary, I directly quoted them.
I wasn't looking for a debate either, I was replying to your points..as far as I know thats still ok to do.
We are in the 'discuss it' section.

Thats ok if you dont want to reply to my post but could you please supply the info on sexual pleasure because I cant find any anywhere? And just so there's no confusion...I'm not being smart or patronising or rude- I am genuinely interested in reading it.

[Ys_Woman]

I am having a baby boy :yelclap:

DH is dead against circumsition and im undecided I wanna hear from pro and anti i wanna hear good and bad i wanna make a decision do i put my foot down and say yes im getting him done or do i not get it done

Please help
Firstly, congrats on your pregnancy:goodvibes:.
Honestly though, we cannot and should not influence your decision. This is a private matter between you and your husband. You either have a reason for, maybe due to past experience, family tradition, or cultural influence; or you don't have a reason for. If you don't then why bother really.

Mostly when you put out a question like this all you will get is a circular debate from the pro-choice and the anti-circ people. It's endless believe me:yes:..lol.

Talk with your gp/obgyn, read as much as you need about the pros and cons, and talk with your husband. Good luck with whatever you decide.

Amy:)

[sandy cheeks]

congrats just wanted to say not sure if any1 posted it but there is a new procedure called the plastiring/bell so they dont cut the forskin off put a plastic ring on it and it falls off friends had it done and said it caused no problems i wanted ds done (midwife looked at me like i was a killer and was rather nasty in her answer when i asked for advice she gave me her opinion:thumbsdown:) but didnt have this procedure in my state at the time so his intact.

[MelissafromSyd]

there is a new procedure called the plastiring/bell so they dont cut the forskin off put a plastic ring on it and it falls off friends had it done and said it caused no problems

I have seen this done a few times. It's important to remember that in a baby, the foreskin is adhered to the glans, and this procedure still requires that the foreskin be stripped from the glans plus the frenulum to be cut (usually). This causes pain and can also scar the glans.

[shed]

I am not against circumcision. If my son gets repeated infections and it is recommended by more than one doctor that we get him circumcised then we probably will. I do believe it is sometimes necessary and probably always has been.

But I wouldn't consider removing a piece of his genitals for no reason.

In victorian times circumcision was very popular as it reduced the feeling of sexual pleasure and they believed this would stop boys from masturbating (which is a sin). That was its primary purpose. They knew it affected the feeling in the penis.

Times have changed and most people don't want to purposefully reduce sexual pleasure for their children as they grow into adults.

[sweetsugardumplin']

DH is really against it, so im gonna go with him and not get him done.

:yelclap:

[2girls&1boy]

After reading some of the replies here, I think you are definately NOT going to get many objective views. Some comments - I am not going to mention I found to be rather extreme views almost bordering on sensationalism.

I agree with a few of the other earliers posts - read the pro & anti websites & threads and then decide together with your husband what you believe is right for YOU and little boy.

[bronny-jane]

im not pro or anti... i just could never put my baby through that kind of pain... so we left him the way he is:yes:

[cocobambino]

The question sounds something like this to me..
Should I surgically remove part of my newborn child's genitals or not? Cutting healthy tissue off without a demonstrable cause? No thanks. Leave it alone unless there's real evidence of a need to intervene. Cutting off foreskins to prevent penile infections is a bit like removing the baby's toes to prevent ingrown toenails.

WOW i didnt word it like that and i dont apreciate having my words twisted:no:



Hopefully the mod's will close this thread now that the OP's question has been answered and she has come to a decision.

Yes mods our decision is made please close