Feeling like a failure... 15 month old won't go to sleep

[happyone2]

Hi all,

Would welcome advice or just some encouragement.

My DS who has always been an excellent sleeper eg. falls asleep on his own with no crying has suddenly started not going to sleep without me being in the room.

He only seems to be doing this at night. For the past couple of months he has been sick on and off with colds and croup. During this time he would only go to sleep being held. This normally happens when he's sick but he would always go back to himself when he got better. Not this time :hair:

Apart from all the sickness recently he is teething (incisors and molars) and during his bout of sickness weaned himself on the boob. He only did this because he was unable to feed with a stuffy nose for over a week. Due to me being pregnant my milk just dried up over that week.

I think it might be a combination of all of the above causing separation anxiety but it is wearing me out. I'm 27 weeks pregnant and worried I'll have two kids that won't sleep soon. I feel like a failure because I can't seem to get him to feel safe on his own. At the moment I have to sit next to his cot until he falls asleep and sneak out the room, this is taking anywhere from 30 mins to 1 1/2 hours, same again if he wakes during the night.

I personally don't believe in CC. Is this just a phase? Has anyone gone through something similar? Have any advice? I'm exhausted :sleeping::sleeping:

Sorry for the long post.

[KatiesMum]

Firstly - big :hugs:. It is hard trying to manage a toddler with all of the exhaustion that pregnancy brings.

Secondly - yes :yes: it is just a stage. Unfortunately no-one can tell you how long it will last.

My DD did this for about a month or so .... wanted me to actually nurse her to sleep - and again if she woke up during the night. Then one night it was just back to normal ....

:hugs: and hope that it gets better for you soon.

[Kirstlea]

I am 32 weeks pregnant with 2 already so can sympathise with you on the feeling exhausted issue.

Its funny because my 22mth old has started acting up when its bed time and when I say acting up, he keeps coming out of his room and sneaks around to see what everyone else is doing:laughing:

I must say though he is obviously anxious about something and I suspect its me getting rounder that is more the issue and also he has his 2yr molars trying to kick in too.

The only thing I have been able to do if he gets worked up is sing to him, sounds strange but it works for us. Sometimes it can take half an hour but it does work. When he wakes up in the middle of the night he just comes and crawls into our bed so I think the issue is he wants mum and dad close. He knows something is up but doesn't quite understand the full deal.

He also has just started becoming very upset if I leave him with anyone ie his Nana or a close friend who he knows well. I am thinking the whole going to sleep thing is more separation anxiety combine with the molars and me being pregnant.

It is quite common at this age and so far I have just been trying to ride it out. I am hoping like hell that he readjusts himself before this new baby comes because I don't think we can all fit in the bed:laughing:

Sorry if this isn't much help but atleast you know you are not alone.

[happyone2]

Thanks ladies nice to know I'm not alone!!

My instincts tell me it's just a matter of waiting it out, I think I will try and do just that! I've tried to follow my instincts so far and has worked a treat every time, although generally with faster results than this. It's already been a couple of weeks so hopefully not much more to go.

:fingerscrossed: he gets back to normal before #2 arrives :rolleyes:

[Mama2Mia]

My gosh this must be a thing for 15mth olds!
My 15mth old has ALWAYS been a fantastic sleeper...puts herself to sleep at night and sleeps 10-12hrs.

For some reason the past 2 weeks, i have to be in the room with her and keep rolling her back onto her back to sleep (she gets up and plays). On top of this, she wakes up at about 3am wanting to play..she's up for about an hour before i can get her back to sleep right through to the morning.

Things started to go pear shaped when we started putting her in child care 3 weeks ago....i have a feeling this may have contributed to this new routine of hers but i'm too pregnant and am exhausted by her new hours and routine. By the sounds of the other posts there's hope this could just be a phase and hopefully she'll learn to put herself to sleep again and not be so clingy before the baby arrives in 4mths!

Looking forward to reading other people's experiences!

[happyone2]

I really hope it's just a phase to!:fingerscrossed:

Everytime I think he might be getting a little better he goes and has a bad day (like today!!!)

I'm exhausted, can't imagine how exhausted I'm going to be if he isn't better before the next one comes. :(

[happyone2]

****UPDATE*****

The past 4 days my DS has gone to sleep all by himself. and so far has only woken up once where I needed to re-settle him (that happened to be the 1st night in his new bedroom so to be expected!) apart from that just generally once a night to put his dummy in and I walked straight back out.
:smiliedance::smiliedance::smiliedance:

I'm soooo happy after weeks and weeks of bad sleep he seems to be starting to go back to himself again!

For those who are interested I did change a few things in his bedtime routine and they seemed to help.

I used to let him roam for about 10 mins after his last bottle and now I've cut that out and put him straight to bed after it. I now leave his musical mobile on (very quietly) and leave his door open until he goes to sleep. Apart from that I've just really tightened up his bedtime routine (like down to the last minute!).

Anyway hope it last and is this way cause baby #2 will be here very soon!!

[Mama2Mia]

Happyone2 congrats!!!

I'm happy to say that for the past 3nights our 15mth old DD has returned to her normal self and is sleeping right through again.....

for some strange reason for the first time ever, she's decided she likes sleeping on her tummy the whole night! I'm now wondering whether she was frustrated because i kept flipping her back onto her back :laughing:...but also she had a few days where she had fevers and a stuffy nose which may have triggered it.

we've got our babies back....yay :yelclap:

[neostudded]

Congratulations. My own son has gone through shocker sleeping patterns though the last 14 months, believe me, your not a failure. :hugs:

[babynow]

It usually happens that in daytime child sleeps after having some feeds and sleeps whole day. This affects at night and he is remains waked at night how much you try.