Is Getting an Embryo Like Adoption?

[kalynn]

We have been trying for several years to fall pregnant, not long after we got together. We've gone through trying naturally, looking at IVF (we started too late), and donor egg (no luck there).

Our local clinic just told us that there are 2 embryos available to us. DW is excited, but I'm getting cold feet.

I've always wanted to father my own child, for all sorts of reasons. I'm concerned about us getting an embryo rather than an egg because I won't be the child's biological father. To me it seems very close to adopting, a path I don't want to go down.

What do others think, feel, & experienced about this?
Does accepting a donated embryo feel like adopting a baby? How will the child deal with it?

[Blueberry Crumble]

I havent any experience, so sorry. But to me, it seems like you would in a sense be adopting an embryo rather than an actual baby. The fact that the embryo has to develop inside your wife, seek nourishment from her body and you both will be able to watch her belly grow, seems to be a little more intimate than adopting a child. You are lucky because you will be able to bond with the baby right thru the pregnancy, and watch the baby be born.

I guess with infertility, you take what you can get. Or what you feel comfortable with. I think it sounds like a lovely opportunity, one that many others would give their right leg for.

Maybe speak to your wife about seeking counselling if you are feeling worried?

As for how the child deals with it, I wouldnt be too concerened. Just be honest with them, children adapt pretty well.

[DonnaR]

While adoption is "a path you don't want to go down" Using a donor embryo has all the advantages that Jbelle described. You would be the child parents, if it all goes well:).

I do think that you should take advantage of any counselling your clinic offers as they will probably have heard similar concerns and be able to help you

P.S
I am actually adopted and my parents were always open with me. At the moment I am trying to figure out if DH and I will "adopt out" our remaining embryos

[jo-anne.36]

:wave: Ken, donnaR :yes: you are right its better to have donor eggs and donor embryos then adoption and especialy if you over the age that adoption allows you to adopted which the age is 43 even if one parnter 43 and the other one is youger its to bad

this has happen to us my DH is 43 this year and iam 38 its to late for us and the only way we can be parents now donor embryos and we have been searching for uor special couple or person to come uor way. wish us luck and :fingerscrossed:

well good luck kEN

DonnaR i would like to wish you good luck to you and your DH gee i read that you have 2 sets of twins wow i cant'nt imagine how busy you both are take care xxxxx jojo