Frazzled
25-08-2008, 08:37 PM
The Prelude;)
After five months of trying we found out early December, that we were pregnant with our second child. After having to wait to try again after surgery for CIN III, we were desperate to add to our family. We had lost a baby in March last year, which was shattering. It had taken us two and a half years to fall pregnant with DS1, so we were so surprised after five months that it had happened so soon! We were very very excited but soon into the pregnancy I started bleeding. My heart fell as I was sure I was miscarrying again. After more blood tests, my levels were ok and got good news on Christmas Eve that things were going well. So on Christmas Day we shared the news with our very excited family that we were having another baby.
At my first ob appointment my doctor and I discussed the possibility of a VBAC briefly with him and he mentioned the likelihood that I would have to deliver at the public hospital because of possible complications. I felt unsure about this but knew I had a while to talk about the options so moved onto thinking about the next bump in the road - my cervix. Because of my surgery of CIN III, I had lost a large portion of my cervix which means a possible 40% of not being able to carry. My ob sent me for a scan at 12 weeks to measure the length and to make sure it was not opening. All was fine and I was rescheduled at 16 weeks.
So at 16 weeks I had another scan. I had to leave an appointment that I was in the middle of with my parents and three oncologists who were giving my dad the diagnosis of his bone cancer (yes it has been a rough year). I thought everything would be fine and didn’t even give it a second thought. Unfortunately, my cervix had shortened by 2.5cms and was showing signs of ‘beaking’. I was wrecked. I had to walk back into the appointment with my parents only to find them shattered, and I had to pretend everything was ok.
My ob then sent me for internal scans every week until 22 weeks, and for that time my cervix remained the same length. By 22 weeks, I had endured something like 16 ultrasounds (most of them were internal). But, this opposed to the thought of being bed-ridden, or sutured or worse, was far better. My ob was happy from here to let things go, and we all breathed a huge sigh of relief when I reached 28 weeks and there had not been a sign of labour.
My dad went through massive surgery for his cancer and lost his right eye. My family faced a massive and heart wrenching journey together and we needed something happy to look forward to. (On that note - my dad is doing well and has been given an all-clear for now but has 3 monthly scans).
My pregnancy then went quite well and I was happy not to have the chronic headaches and BP probs I had with DS1. We found out at 30 weeks that we were expecting a little boy and were very very excited. I continued to research VBAC and got lots of great advice and support from the ladies here. My battles were my family who all thought I should just have the c-s, because they were worried for me. My DH was amazing and researched with me. My ob was final on his decision that I would deliver at the public hospital, so I took it on board and organised a friend who is a midwife there to be my support person.
As I got closer, my ob was concerned with the size of the baby - he thought it was a big one and didn’t think I could deliver - seeing as I got stuck with 3.4 kilos last time. I had lots of questions and he was good in answering them. We decided to do a growth scan at 38 weeks and make the decision from there. I was unhappy about him being so fixed on the constant monitoring, but trusted him as the expert and thought I could test my luck when the day arrived!
So, at 36 weeks I had a bleed and was admitted to hospy for the weekend. Still don’t know what it was and everything continued ok from then. I finished work at the end of my 37th week and at 38 weeks the growth scan showed the baby was 3.72 kilos and predicted him to be 4.1 at term. I knew what my next appointment would bring - as the ob had given me a 3.8 limit.
At my 39 week appointment I was gutted and cried the whole time. His 2 midwives were amazing, comforting me. One of them telling me she had 4 c-s, and imagine how as a midwife that made her feel. They both went in to talk to him before he saw me and he was great. He said the scans can be out by 15% and he would take this into consideration. I got the feeling though that he was just appeasing me. He did an ultrasound and had a feel about and said that I didn’t look like I was going into labour anytime soon. So we decided that he would let me go to the following Friday and if I showed no signs of labour by then, we would do a c-s. This would give me a week to come to terms with it and mentally prepare myself.
I looked forward to another week at home getting ready and finishing things off, but little one had different ideas . . .
After five months of trying we found out early December, that we were pregnant with our second child. After having to wait to try again after surgery for CIN III, we were desperate to add to our family. We had lost a baby in March last year, which was shattering. It had taken us two and a half years to fall pregnant with DS1, so we were so surprised after five months that it had happened so soon! We were very very excited but soon into the pregnancy I started bleeding. My heart fell as I was sure I was miscarrying again. After more blood tests, my levels were ok and got good news on Christmas Eve that things were going well. So on Christmas Day we shared the news with our very excited family that we were having another baby.
At my first ob appointment my doctor and I discussed the possibility of a VBAC briefly with him and he mentioned the likelihood that I would have to deliver at the public hospital because of possible complications. I felt unsure about this but knew I had a while to talk about the options so moved onto thinking about the next bump in the road - my cervix. Because of my surgery of CIN III, I had lost a large portion of my cervix which means a possible 40% of not being able to carry. My ob sent me for a scan at 12 weeks to measure the length and to make sure it was not opening. All was fine and I was rescheduled at 16 weeks.
So at 16 weeks I had another scan. I had to leave an appointment that I was in the middle of with my parents and three oncologists who were giving my dad the diagnosis of his bone cancer (yes it has been a rough year). I thought everything would be fine and didn’t even give it a second thought. Unfortunately, my cervix had shortened by 2.5cms and was showing signs of ‘beaking’. I was wrecked. I had to walk back into the appointment with my parents only to find them shattered, and I had to pretend everything was ok.
My ob then sent me for internal scans every week until 22 weeks, and for that time my cervix remained the same length. By 22 weeks, I had endured something like 16 ultrasounds (most of them were internal). But, this opposed to the thought of being bed-ridden, or sutured or worse, was far better. My ob was happy from here to let things go, and we all breathed a huge sigh of relief when I reached 28 weeks and there had not been a sign of labour.
My dad went through massive surgery for his cancer and lost his right eye. My family faced a massive and heart wrenching journey together and we needed something happy to look forward to. (On that note - my dad is doing well and has been given an all-clear for now but has 3 monthly scans).
My pregnancy then went quite well and I was happy not to have the chronic headaches and BP probs I had with DS1. We found out at 30 weeks that we were expecting a little boy and were very very excited. I continued to research VBAC and got lots of great advice and support from the ladies here. My battles were my family who all thought I should just have the c-s, because they were worried for me. My DH was amazing and researched with me. My ob was final on his decision that I would deliver at the public hospital, so I took it on board and organised a friend who is a midwife there to be my support person.
As I got closer, my ob was concerned with the size of the baby - he thought it was a big one and didn’t think I could deliver - seeing as I got stuck with 3.4 kilos last time. I had lots of questions and he was good in answering them. We decided to do a growth scan at 38 weeks and make the decision from there. I was unhappy about him being so fixed on the constant monitoring, but trusted him as the expert and thought I could test my luck when the day arrived!
So, at 36 weeks I had a bleed and was admitted to hospy for the weekend. Still don’t know what it was and everything continued ok from then. I finished work at the end of my 37th week and at 38 weeks the growth scan showed the baby was 3.72 kilos and predicted him to be 4.1 at term. I knew what my next appointment would bring - as the ob had given me a 3.8 limit.
At my 39 week appointment I was gutted and cried the whole time. His 2 midwives were amazing, comforting me. One of them telling me she had 4 c-s, and imagine how as a midwife that made her feel. They both went in to talk to him before he saw me and he was great. He said the scans can be out by 15% and he would take this into consideration. I got the feeling though that he was just appeasing me. He did an ultrasound and had a feel about and said that I didn’t look like I was going into labour anytime soon. So we decided that he would let me go to the following Friday and if I showed no signs of labour by then, we would do a c-s. This would give me a week to come to terms with it and mentally prepare myself.
I looked forward to another week at home getting ready and finishing things off, but little one had different ideas . . .