Would you use the same name again? [Archive] - Bub Hub Pregnancy & Parenting Forum

MilkOnTap

01-05-2006, 19:51

At each of our pregnancies we decided on a boys name and a girls name... We believe our first bub was a boy, and the second was a girl and have since given them each names... Not officially or anything (duh) but nonetheless when talking about the first loss or second loss, my husband and I will say the name (Sarah or Harry)...

My husband still likes both of the names we had chosen and still wants to use one or both of those names for future healthy pregnancies and babies... What do you think? Could you give a name to a bub born into this world that which should have been given to a bub who didn't quite make it?

Pixie

01-05-2006, 20:01

ohh I think that would be a very personal choice for each individual Ally :hugs:

myself I don't think I would even the name we had picked out for Eliza had she been a boy I will not use in the future....just me lol

oops I didn't see where this was posted sorry:o

InSaneOne

01-05-2006, 20:03

i don't know the answer t that one. you just have to do what you think is best. i didn't name my baby after i misscarried. i think i was a little bit relieved (i was 17 and in grade 12 at the time). i know that i would love to call out next dd (if we have one) Joy - after dh's great aunt who passed away just after dd was born. he was really close to her and we like the name.

but using a name of one of my babies that didn't make it. i personally don't think that i could. but thats just my opinion.

:hugs: to whatever you decide to do.

rynosmum

01-05-2006, 20:08

Hi Ally,

I dreamt of having a little girl named Madison since I was a little girl. After we lost our first bub, we named her Madison. We don't really refer to her by name but it's the way I remember her.

We decided that we wouldn't use that name for our next child - somehow it just wouldn't seem right to me. Although I often think I'm a bit of a drama queen over it all - it took me a while to get over ours.

K

Shakey

01-05-2006, 21:02

MilkOnTap

01-05-2006, 21:13

Lots of people are saying its up to everyone individually... I was just wondering what everyone else would do...

I dont know what I would do still... I will consider it when I have a healthy pregnancy!

brokendove

01-05-2006, 21:41

Hi,

I dont know what the sex of our baby was, but we do have a nick name for that baby "baby chino" the size of a coffee bean when we found out we were Pg.

Iam not sure what I would do, iam debating wether to even call the next pg a "babychino"

so I guess that would be a no to the whole name thing, I liked the idea above as a middle name, thought that was nice...

shed

01-05-2006, 21:44

I am now six months along and we have only just started referring to bubby by the name we have chosen. Only occasionally though and we've just started. Mainly because I didn't want to have to make this choice if something terrible happened.

If anything happened now then I probably wouldn't use his name again even though I love it. Good luck with whatever you decide, you probably won't know till the time comes.

CJJHRA

01-05-2006, 21:51

I couldnt use it as their first name, possibly as a middle name though.

littlepickle

01-05-2006, 22:18

I am 26 weeks and we have named our bub Elise. To me, that is her name now and would always be her name, I dont think i could use the name for anyone else.
I know someone who lost a baby and the midwife/councellor told her that it would be easier for her to come to terms with if she named the baby to give her an identity. I guess it is a very individual decision - all I can say is what I would do under the circumstances. Good luck with whatever you decide :hugs:

Lunar

01-05-2006, 22:26

I personally would not use the same names.

I had 2 m/c but did not name the babies.
It was personally easier for me not to.
But names that I had considered for both of those that didn't make it never even entered my head when I was pregnant with Kailah.

I have liked different names for each pregnancy, very weird I know.

Fairyfloss

02-05-2006, 03:56

it is a very individual decision, I named both of the babies I M/C, but I personally would not/could not use thoses names for my next babies, it is just too painful to remember, and not using them helps me with move on with the new bay rarther tahn be stuck in the past, good luck with your decision.:hugs:

MumsieMel

02-05-2006, 06:05

I couldnt use it as their first name, possibly as a middle name though.

I feel the same, more as a dedication IYKWIM :hugs:

maybe1more

02-05-2006, 11:56

When i miscarried, i had a list of names for both sex but i hadnt decided on which one, so being pregnant again i have kept the list as i still like the names ive picked out, so im sure my baby will have one of theses names.

Imamum2b

02-05-2006, 12:10

We have had our names chosen for some time and although we just miscarried, I have no hesitation is saying we will stick to the names we chose.

We hadn't had the sex confirmed yet, so I don't know if that would change it.

I was only 8 or 9 weeks so I hadn't thought of it as having a person inside me yet though.

sugar n spice

02-05-2006, 12:11

Hi ya Ally, I think this is a individual thing, I personally wouldn't use a name for one baby and use it for another, I would on the other hand use the name as a middle name, we named our first born who we sadly lost, I wouldn't use his name again but would concider using his name as a middle name if we were to have another boy.

Yep i totally agree i could not imagine using my angle child ( if that ever happened, no that it has) name but yes as a middle name that would be nice.

what do you all think though on a slightly different level about names, say you picked a name for a boys and girl then had the which ever would you consider the other name if you had another child of that sex?

Peaceangels

02-05-2006, 12:13

Not having gone through what you have Ally, I think the idea of using one of the same names as a middle name is a lovely idea.

Alot of middle names used are from family that have passed, so it would be a special memory to you and DH (& your kids when they are old enough to know about their angel siblings).

Lunar

02-05-2006, 15:26

Yes for a middle name. that's a good idea:thumbsup: .
Then it can have a deeper meaning (YKWIM?)
And when that child gets alot older you can tell them why you chose the names and that their middle name is even more special.....?
I like that idea, very nice.

Eternity

02-05-2006, 17:35

For me it would depend how far along I was. im 19 weeks now and have called my little girl Sophia I have seen her on ultrasound and felf her kickiing so If I lost her I would never be able to call any other of my babies Sophia, it would be like she never exsisted.I would not be able to refer to her and it would be too painful. But If I was only in very early stages and did not know the sex then that might be different. Depends of the situation

TwoBlue

02-05-2006, 17:46

personally i wouldnt use the same names again...
those names belong to your beautiful angel babies....

just my opinion though and its a very personal decision to be made...

with both my boys we had girls names picked and i wouldnt use those names if i ever had a girl...

*Chels*

02-05-2006, 19:09

Ive never had a miscarriage,but my lillte brother died when he was 11 weeks old.His name was Camden,my Mum LOVED that name and was dissapointed that she really never got to use it.
So when we had our son,we gave him a middle name of Camden to honour him and his name.

Lunar

02-05-2006, 19:11

Blessed Mum

02-05-2006, 20:15

My s-i-l miscarried last year at 10weeks & felt she was having a girl & already had a name picked & we all loved it, she is due to have her baby later this year & now knows she is having a girl & because we all loved the name she had picked before I asked her if she would use it and she said no. For me personally probably not as a first name but as a second name for sure. That would be nice.

Good luck with whatever you guys decide.

2littleprincesses

03-05-2006, 13:26

I haven't been in this situation, but I don't think I could use the same name as I'd named another baby.

Along a similar, but different path - DH always wanted a boy and had a name picked out since he was 17. We were going to name our first bub this if we had a boy. Then we still were going to use that name if #2 was a boy.

Tam-I-Am

06-05-2006, 23:55

When I had my miscarriage, it was too early to know the sex, but I always felt that I was having a girl, and named her (Amy Alida - which means "Beloved, Little Winged One" - which I thought was quite appropriate).

I would never be able to call another bubba by either of these names - they are Amy's and Amy's alone. To call another baby by her name would be to deny she ever existed.

Having said that, I certainly wouldn't judge another person who did re-use names.

angel_one

07-05-2006, 17:35

when we had our first little girl all the names in the world came up and we even managed to name allllll of our future children (however that now has changed!! funny that) when we lost our 2nd baby we had 2 names in line for it (or she as a think of her) neither of those name were used, as i came up with the name angel Rose (part of the name we were gonna use (Tahleah rose)) i just found it the most fitting at the time as she was our little angel. we have just recently welcomed (nearly 5 months ago now) our latest baby, we wanted to use the name robert, but as dh has a little brother called robert that died as a baby, we just couldnt use the name as a first (i thought it would be tooooo much for mil who is still very upset over it (she had a very late m/c after robert died) so shes still sensitive about them, so we named our baby boy, Bailey Robert James as the name is also in both our familes.

Mum&bubs

07-05-2006, 17:40

Yep i dont think I'd be able to name the new baby a name i had chosen for the one i had a m/c with because i used to pat my belly & say its name even though i wasnt sure it was a boy or girl so i dont think id be able to do the same name. But everyone is different.

Kirstlea

10-05-2006, 22:56

Hi Ally84

You asked what we would do?

Well we named our last baby Morgan whether it was a girl or boy.

She was born too early but because we had given her the name that was it.

It doesn't feel right to use Morgans name for another sibling.

We won't pick any names for this one until the last month as we don't want to jinx ourselves. It bugs the hell out of me that I won't be calling out to Morgan as I love that name but I also don't want the reminder every single day that the next sibling is not the original Morgan, iykwim.

Thats how we feel.

Goodluck but if you don't like the idea even one little bit don't do it as its a life long decision that can't be changed. Remember the saying if in doubt go without or don't do it.

:)

kymmy

11-05-2006, 09:53

When I miscarried,
we named our baby Torren Shane
We wouldn't use it again
I think a name can describe a time
and how you are feeling....?

SixtiesChild

11-05-2006, 13:52

To name a child is such an important part of their identity.
I think it's a lovely thing to do, to name a baby that didn't make it and give it their own identity.
There is nothing wrong with letting them have the name you like best and letting them keep it.
For those reasons, I think that I would choose a new name for a new baby but I don't think there are any rules with this. It is the choice of the parents and how strongly they personally feel about it.

Goodluck

Percy

11-05-2006, 19:22

I m/c at 15 weeks, it was a little boy who we called Thomas. I still adore the name, and if we have another son, we will use it as a middle name.

But i think if you truly love the name, it might be a nice way to remember your little angels, but as everyone else has said, its such a personal choice.

MilkOnTap

12-05-2006, 15:45

Wow! Its really interesting reading everyones individual responses to this... I guess it will come down to what my husband and I feel that we want to do (which I'm sure is bound to be opposite opinions lol)

I should have made a poll! :rolleyes: :D

arthursmum

15-05-2006, 05:10

Heartsdesire

14-06-2006, 11:02

I personally wouldnt use a name i had chosen for a previous pregnancy though my last 2 miscarriages i didnt really have names for them i had always loved the name Katelyn rose if i had a girl or corey if it was a boy, you just gotta think on what you personally would want and later if your child found out you intended to name a previous child the same name it would be rather weird for them.

Bel1978

21-06-2006, 16:09

If you like the name and the baby officially did not have it, i would use it. Personally after losing 3 i wouldn't name a baby but i guess thats up to you. I love the name Mahalia,Dakota and Xavierand hope one day i will be able to use them. Until then i will kepp the names vacant.

Is there any other names you like?? I have a puppy Scooby as we do not have children yet he means the world to me and always will. If some thing ever happened to Scooby i would never re-use his name, there will always be one scooby in my life. I guess if you feel the same consider other names.

delliepooh

21-06-2006, 16:20

my cousin recently had a still born boy, and was lucky enough to have a successful birth second time around, this time it was a girl but they used the boys name as a middle name for the girl as it was a multi-sex name... this is a beautiful link to her brother but not a constant reminder of him for the family.

again i think its personal choice.