should i be notifying childrens services??

[nugglyboysmum]

Was at my Uncle's house yesterday and his wife bought her neice back to their place victoria to stay for a few nights. The little girl is 4 years old and such a smart little cutie, but pretty full-on to be around. Anyway, her mum has been on and off drugs all the child's life and the little girl rarely gets any attention. The little girl rarely gets fruit and veges, she is always fed junk food, but this is what has me in total shock. My Aunty asked her neice to open her mouth and show her teeth. ALL of her molars are completely filled with black rot!!! I have never seen anything like it in my life, the pain this little girl must be in, no wonder she is such a bad night sleeper! Apparently her teeth have been in that condition for a very long time and my aunty is constantly telling the girl's mum to take her to the dentist or she will call childrens services, but still nothing has been done. I feel like now that i know i have an obligation to notify childrens services s this little girl might get the care she deserves, i would take her in in a heart beat to give her the love and attention she needs.

So, do I just hope that her mother finally takes her daughter to the dentist or do i make the call to childrens services??

[Whoops]

I would call children's services. From what I am told, there is no action taken unless they get three calls of complaint. So if action is taken you will know that you are not the only one concearned about this little girl.

[Grizabella]

If she has been asked numerous times and not taken her daughter (nevermind the fact she shouldn't have to be TOLD - she should be looking after her daughter well enough to avoid the scenario altogether!) Then I would call them.

Poor little mite.

[ogsmum]

i reckon you should call child services - it's not about offending the mother, it's about protecting the child. the child is young and her teeth still have a chance of recovery because they're probably only 'baby' teeth anyway so maybe when her adult teeth grow through she could be in luck. don't worry about the mother - this is a small child that needs to have her needs met, and if her mother can't - that's why we have child services in this country. you're not the only person who has had to do this either - nurses, teachers and others who work with children are obliged to report these situations, so consider yourself no different. you'd be doing the right thing :yes: good luck :fingerscrossed:

[cazzamumof3]

I have just recently done a manadtory course with child services,, and this is what we were told... If you feel that the child is being neglected, physically, emotionally,or verbal abuse etc..Report it...

What they do is ask many quiestions and have other contacts with other services to see if the family may be able to be assisted..

There aim is to keep families together these days, not separate them....

Hope this mum gets the help she needs, and the little girls teeth get the care that is needed...

xx cazza

[Freya]

That's so sad. You only get one set of teeth.:(

I honestly don't know if I would call...

[StrawberryTheMilkshake]

I didnt know about the 3 calls thing. I was under the assumption that if they receive a call, it MUST be investigated. But i dont know, im not in child services!

There is neglect that can be reported based on a child's health/ wellbeing not being met which sounds like it in this case- im not talking about the junk food im talking about the rotting teeth.

Ive been around children all my career and we had a child come to us who drank so much sugary purple 'child focused' drink (dont know if im allowed to say the name on here but im sure you know) that he needed an operation- ALL his baby teeth pulled out, and new metal/ steel teeth put into place. The pain, ridicule and sadness this child will endure until the adult teeth come through is appalling.

I say report it.... even if they dont investigate, i guess the only thing you can take from it is that you did the right thing in putting the best interests of the child first.

STM :)

[Bewitched]

Yes i would.

[nugglyboysmum]

thanks so much every one, i will be making the call in the morning, i really did feel deep down that i should call, so now i def will

[SPC]

It's neglect, report it:
http://www.aifs.gov.au/nch/resources/reporting.html

[Izy]

wow- normlly I'm not a 'call them now' kind of person, but this needs to be reported.

Poor dental hygeniene (extreme) has been linked to all sorts of dangerous complications including heart complications. Yes even in a child that age.

Not seeking the help is not on. And as someone else has already mentioned, child services will do thier best to keep her in her family home... they will normally support the mum to help herself and her daughter.

[Samaras Mummy]

How sad!.....I would call.

[WarriorMummy]

in sa theres a multiple call rule or something- i had to call tonnes of times and went into the office with a video tape of myy brother and sister being neglected-
they then ended up taking the kids away and putting them together in a foster home with a wonderful lady
they are now happy and safe and healthy- also they now have absolutely no access with their mum and she didnt bother to even see them when she could

i would call- most likely they will visit and that may be enough to get the mother to take her to the dentist

[Jakois]

I think you should definantly call.
Poor little mite:(. Imagine how much pain it would be causing:crying:..

[Bewitched]

in sa theres a multiple call rule or something- i had to call tonnes of times and went into the office with a video tape of myy brother and sister being neglected-
they then ended up taking the kids away and putting them together in a foster home with a wonderful lady
they are now happy and safe and healthy- also they now have absolutely no access with their mum and she didnt bother to even see them when she could

i would call- most likely they will visit and that may be enough to get the mother to take her to the dentist

Just had to say how brave and caring you are to help your siblings out like that :hugs::hugs:

[Roopee]

Not too sure that I would call- I think it's incredibly sad though. Poor thing must be in agony.

If it were me- I'd be taking her to the dentist myself and paying for it.
If her teeth have bene like this for a long time can i just ask why your Aunt hasn't taken her to the dentist? Not trying to argue at all, just wondering.

[nugglyboysmum]

oh my gosh, i just made about 15 calls to different numbers and finally got through to who i needed to report to and it was my Aunty's voicemail!! (different aunty) So i panicked and hung up, i mean, if this girls feral parents find out that im the one who made the call then im scared for the welfare of me and my family! I really am in a difficult position now, i just really want to help this little girl though, what am i going to do??

roopee - I told my aunty to take her to the dentist too, i can't believe she hasn't before now, she was almost gonna call them but them she realised that the little girl would surely have to be put under to have all that work done and that probably wouldn't be able to be done in the next day or 2 before the little girl goes home, and what about parental consent for the dental work? I still urged her to at least call the dentist and chat to them about it, but no. Maybe I should call the dentist and ask them for their advice on the situation?? Gosh i really ust dont know what to do,might call this little girl's aunty and chat to her about it.

[Eggflip]

I would get your aunty to do it. If they suspect she made the call they might not let the girl go back to your aunty but if your aunty makes the call she might get temporary custody.

[nugglyboysmum]

Well, i called and made the report, fat lot of good it did! Aparently rotten teeth are not cause for concern, unless she is covered in bruises they are not interested. So this poor little girl is doomed to a mouth full of rot or false teeth all her life, woohoo! I feel very upset that nothing can be done about this. I asked tem if tey could at least make a phone call to the mum or dropin and see her and advise her to take her child to the dentist, but no, the childs family need to be the ones to convince her to take her daughter to the dentist gggrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!! What hope is there for the children of this world?

[cho]

Maybe contact her school? What is the mothers issue with taking her to the dentist??? SHe can take her to the dental hospital which is very cheap! About $15 I think. Even if it was $100 why wouldn't she take her? I don't understand. Can you offer to take her yourself? Buy her a toothbrush and toothpaste and teach her to do it everyday twise a day. Is the teeth thing the only issue? If there are other welfare concerns they might consider making a visit.

[nugglyboysmum]

cho - I live 3 hours away from this little girl so unfortunatelt i can't really do a lot to help her from here, she was down here for a holiday cause her mum is yet again coming off drugs. Her mother is extremely selfish, that is the only reason this little girl hasn't been taken to the dentist. Other than the teeth and extreme lack of positive attention this girl is healthy happy and smart.(i don't knowhow)

It turns out DH called to report as well and they took his report very seriously, he is a Paramedic, so F'ed up that they didn't give 2 hoots about my report cause im just a mum. Great news for the little girl she has a dentist appointment next week which her Granny and mum are taking her to. I really don't understand why it has taken this long, but better late than never i guess. Thankyou all so much for your caring and advice

[Me]

I know it is frustrating for you that they didn't listen to you, but at least she is having her much needed appointment! I hope it's not too traumatic for her(seeing as she will need so much work done initially).

[sunnyflower]

:thumbsup:good on you nuggly

[nugglyboysmum]

new me - yeah, i worry for the poor little tike too, how traumatic having all that work done!

sunny - thankyou

[cassvanm]

I would call children's services. From what I am told, there is no action taken unless they get three calls of complaint. So if action is taken you will know that you are not the only one concearned about this little girl.

I would like to clarify this. I have worked for child protection for 8 years and this is not the case. It is assessed at several levels throughout the assessement process, and includes consideration of history on the system, the concerns raised, where the concerns come from, protective factors in the child's life, resources available and age/development of the child.
It is never black and white, and all I can say is that if you ever have the question of if you should report, the answer is always YES. Even if it is not followed up, it is documented, and can be an additional piece in the "jigsaw" that is that child's experience.
I am also pleased to hear that they are now assessing the case (for whatever reason).
Hope this helps.

[cassvanm]

I told my aunty to take her to the dentist too, i can't believe she hasn't before now, she was almost gonna call them but them she realised that the little girl would surely have to be put under to have all that work done and that probably wouldn't be able to be done in the next day or 2 before the little girl goes home, and what about parental consent for the dental work?

I would also like to state that if this child is requiring major dental work, then yes the parent's consent would be required. If she refuses to seek medical attention (that includes dental) then CP may go to court to obtain parental responsibility to ensure that the work gets done.

Also, I personally have removed children based solely on their dental hygiene. Please don't jump to conclusions as to why CP make their decisions, as this is why the media has a frenzy with CP services. Also, it makes our job much more difficult when we do need to investigate and remove children who need our help.

Don't want to upset anyone, but when you are in the system, you get to realise how limited the system is. I am sorry if I offend anyone, but this is the reality based on almost a decade of experience in the field.

Thanks for listening :)

[Nowhere]

Is there a way of taking the little girl to a Gp and getting her refered to the dentist at the childrens hospital that amount of work wil need to be done under a GA, and will be very hard and painful for the little one to recorer from it KWIM

IF the mum is apoachable i would talk to her about it and offer to go with them to the dentist and also a dieticiean at the hospital to work out a suitable meal plan for her

If the mum isnt aproachable then i would called docs

[nugglyboysmum]

thanks so much for the info from your work experience, very helpful

amy - thanks for the advice and ideas, the little girl has a dental appointment tomorrow morning, her mum and Granny are taking her

[Bewitched]

cho - I live 3 hours away from this little girl so unfortunatelt i can't really do a lot to help her from here, she was down here for a holiday cause her mum is yet again coming off drugs. Her mother is extremely selfish, that is the only reason this little girl hasn't been taken to the dentist. Other than the teeth and extreme lack of positive attention this girl is healthy happy and smart.(i don't knowhow)

It turns out DH called to report as well and they took his report very seriously, he is a Paramedic, so F'ed up that they didn't give 2 hoots about my report cause im just a mum. Great news for the little girl she has a dentist appointment next week which her Granny and mum are taking her to. I really don't understand why it has taken this long, but better late than never i guess. Thankyou all so much for your caring and advice

Great news :yes: And how good of your DH to get involved as well :thumbsup:

[munchkins]

I am in shock how can any parent be so irresponcible*!!!!! That poor little girl, I hope they can get all the work done and save her teeth.

[Izy]

Thanks Cassvanm! And detal appointment today, what a great start!

[Cwazywabbit]

nugglyboysmum, I've read through the thread and I'm happy with the outcome . Good on you, your husband, Granny and the girls mother for finally taking action. It shows the girl has a supportive network behind her.

As for mum and blaming her etc. whilst she's coming down and sobering up she's going to need all the support she can get. Sometimes shame and embarrasment can come across as selfishness. They can become very defensive because they know that people have no sympathy for them. (And understandably it is very difficult to have sympathy for the mother when a child is involved.) It's not always the case, but very common for a person getting off drugs to suddenly realise what damage they have done . This can be extremely shameful and in some cases too overwhelming, which can send them back to the drugs. Support and a gentle push in the right direction is much better than blame and ridicule.:) We want this girl to have a healthy happy mother .............for the girls sake.:)

Megs

[Mum2Bella]

im glad a dentist appointment was made,please jkeep us in form of what is happeing

[nugglyboysmum]

cwazyrabbit - thankyou so much for you advice, great advice and i hadn't thought of this this way, makes me understand a little about what the mother is going through.

When i hear anything more i will post here

[cho]

So happy she is going to the dentist :)

[soph01]

I also advise that you call children's services because this is beyond the matter of her teeth. She is being abused and you are right, you have an obligation to report this. Poor little thing...hope everything works out for her best..

[soph01]

I'm glad to hear things are starting to get better for that little girl. You should be proud of yourself, you have changed her life for the best.

[shaniaap8jh]

:iagree:call DOCs cops!!! Better safe than sorry mate! The :bee: needs you to be proactive. The parents need help too. When they are ready they can deal with all their issues. The 4 year is a :baby: you & support can make her life better.