i wanna know the nasties of homebirth?

[smog]

ok so every other thread in the enitre bubhub will have a reference somewhere to someones nasty birth story? u know long labours, big tears, things that went wrong etc. where are the homebirth nasty stories? im not weird in wanting to read other peoples bad stories guess im trying to find a way to get a good birth story myself lol is homebirth the answer? seems u all have only good stories. ive had my bad experiences with birth and if i ever go again i really really really want to get the birth i wanted. so fess up where are all the homebirth bad stories?

[onemummmy]

hmm how odd lol. I am sure there are instances where things dont go to plan, but honestly I think there would be far far far less 'nasties' than hospital births.

[NibbleCurlynBub]

hmm how odd lol. I am sure there are instances where things dont go to plan, but honestly I think there would be far far far less 'nasties' than hospital births.
:iagree:
No offence but I also think it is a bit odd..

The idea is to approach it with a POSITIVE attitude. :D
There are also a few unplanned home births that went very well here too. :yes:

[stellarella]

I think you will find that when a couple decide to HB they take on all the responsibility....knowing that they have that responsibility and knowing that they have the power and control eliminates many of the regrets of a hospital birth.

Not only that but when a woman is at home she isn't being violated or interfered with and even if the birth does turn out to be long or she does tear, or they do need to transfer she is still empowered iykwim.

Most of the horror stories you hear from hospital are because of the way women are treated by staff and the way we are intervened with.

There are stories of women transferring or of having bleeding complications after the birth etc. and yes they are not such wonderful experiences however on the whole the birth is still empowering. I don't know anyone who regrets their HB.

Maybe the stories you are reading in the HB section do include these stories of PPH, transfer etc. (in fact I know some of them do because I have read them) but they are minor details when you consider the whole wonderful experience of birth.

It says a lot about the way women experience their birth when you read birth stories. For example my birth was pretty text book...the usual interventions...the usual 2nd degree tear, healthy baby...etc etc. However I experienced it as severely traumatic so you would read my story from that perspective.

I am about to have a HB...maybe I will tear again, maybe it will still be long...maybe it will be hard...but I am sure the story will reflect the safety and security and love I feel in my own home :)

[trouble]

hhhmmm yes, a little weird, I guess, everyone would to have put a great deal of thought into it, and I guess were kind of prepared for things to not go to plan,

After having my DD2 and there was no way at all of knowing of her problems, and she came out screaming in pain, I realised how greatful I was to be in hospital, as up to that point I was looking into home birth.

And if I did have her at home, I would have died on the spot knowing she would still be in pain, waiting for the ambos and getting to the hospital, I couldnt live with it.

As it was it was long enough for them to get her up to the next floor.

[NibbleCurlynBub]

The place I went to had the NICU on the same floor which I thought was clever. :)

If you don't mind me asking... What happened trouble?

[smog]

hahaha sorry for being weird lol. just wondered i guess if anyone felt the same type of trauma or powerlessness from a homebirth? as u can see im trying to find a way to get the perfect happy birth i want which prob doesnt exist. but its like the homebirthers are much more content and satisfied with their births iykwim.
by the way trouble is your avatar a bulldog pup?its cute

[stellarella]

hahaha sorry for being weird lol. just wondered i guess if anyone felt the same type of trauma or powerlessness from a homebirth? as u can see im trying to find a way to get the perfect happy birth i want which prob doesnt exist. but its like the homebirthers are much more content and satisfied with their births iykwim.
by the way trouble is your avatar a bulldog pup?its cute

You have answered your own question there :yes:

[JATS]

I only personally know 2 people who have had home births and BOTH had horrific experiences. Neither feels able to share their experiences in a public situation (group of people) without copping 'well you must have done something wrong' sort of responses. :no: From the responses here it isn't hard to see how that'd happen.

[onemummmy]

I only personally know 2 people who have had home births and BOTH had horrific experiences. Neither feels able to share their experiences in a public situation (group of people) without copping 'well you must have done something wrong' sort of responses. :no: From the responses here it isn't hard to see how that'd happen.
what do you mean?

[lulu 2]

Well I can see what she means its like the Q was if anyone had a bad homebirth story and all i have heard is that there is more in hospitals ,why not answer the Q if you can otherwise save the pro HB for a post directed that way eh ..I wanted to read the stories too it gives you an idea of what can happen you know so you can prepare ,it is ignorant to think a birth will be perfect just cause its natural and not in a hosp. Oh and I am for HB by the way.
I know of one story that a mother told at our HB group and it was more about her other children they were horrified and upset by their mother screaming in pain they had to be taken to the next door neighbours she said next time the kids would not be there they didn't think of the noise and how the kids would react.

[stellarella]

Well I can see what she means its like the Q was if anyone had a bad homebirth story and all i have heard is that there is more in hospitals ,why not answer the Q if you can otherwise save the pro HB for a post directed that way eh ..I wanted to read the stories too it gives you an idea of what can happen you know so you can prepare ,it is ignorant to think a birth will be perfect just cause its natural and not in a hosp. Oh and I am for HB by the way.
I know of one story that a mother told at our HB group and it was more about her other children they were horrified and upset by their mother screaming in pain they had to be taken to the next door neighbours she said next time the kids would not be there they didn't think of the noise and how the kids would react.

Did you happen to read my post?

I did answer the question, yes there are stories of complications, PPH, transfers etc....there are stories on BH which contain those sorts of details....I'm sorry if it doesn't please you that those same experiences can be found in amongst an otherwise powerful HB story....

I know there is one freebirther on this forum who had a quite traumatic experience.

No one is pretending these things don't happen. We are just sharing what we know to be the truth, and that is that women who have HBs are generally more happy with the experience even when complications occur simply because they have taken it into their own hands and had control over the decisions.

[smog]

yeah i am pro home birthing too wasnt trying to point out things can wrong there too more just wanting to know what went wrong and how it turned out i guess. if anyone still felt unhappy with their homebirth?
im pretty sur e i wouldnt have my other kids at home they would def get upset

[stellarella]

From the responses here it isn't hard to see how that'd happen.

I'd like to know what you mean too because as I have stated twice there ARE stories here on BH which contain details of complications and traumatic circumstances...PPH, transfers, tears etc.

I'm not sure if it's the right thing to do to link people to them...maybe by reading some of the stories it might help you realise that all stories are welcome....especially traumatic ones that require debriefing and healing.

[smog]

ive wondered too i guess if i did have a bub and a homebirth and things didnt work out so well would i get a big fat i told u so from family and friends cause i doubt they would be very supportive of me homebirthing and i know hubby not keen

[stellarella]

Yes there is always someone out there ready to rub it in if something was to go wrong, which is why I am shocked that JATS would suggest that it is fellow HBers who would do the "I told you so"-ing.

I guess it's like anything that we make an informed decision on...we have to own it...we have to be strong enough in our selves to with stand the judgement from others.

But a hospital birth doesn't let you off either. I would be the one rubbing it in to myself if I had a hospital birth which went wrong...and it would be harder coming from myself.

There is no right answer...only what you feel more comfortable with.

I prefer to retain power and take the responsibility and the blows than hand it over to a third party who really doesn't care about me...who just goes home at the end of a shift and has no accountability for my trauma.

[trouble]

The place I went to had the NICU on the same floor which I thought was clever. :)

If you don't mind me asking... What happened trouble?


I complained most of my pregnancy, tha tI couldnt feel her move, and had a big pain under my ribs, from 30 weeks, I did have a scan, and they said bubs is proberly sticking a leg under there, and it should move, but no, it never did, I wanted a home birth, but she was breech and I was worried about my rib pain, so went for the C/S, she had her leg under my ribs, and got stuck as she grew and was unable to turn, they had a hard time getting her out, and as soon as the did, she was screaming in pain, her leg was like a little chicken wing, tucked under herself, and she had a massive lump on her shin, but it was very upsetting to hear her scream in pain, :(
They rushed her to x-ray, and had doctors everywhere, then upstrairs to thetre, where they had to re break her leg and operate. as it must have broken in my belly.

It was strange that she was in pain, but I guess they had to force her out, and it must have disturbed her leg, but im sure too, if I had have tried normally, she wouldnt have came out.

And am pleased that we were at the hospital, as her leg was black and all sorts of drama, but if I had to hear her scream in pain any longer than I did Im sure I would have died myself, it is a horrid noise, as it was I was crying, and am glad I was not at home.

[JATS]

what I meant was if you look in the other sections, esp c/s, at posts where people have specifically asked for negative stories you have no shortage of responses actually giving the OP what they ASKED for.

It is more acceptable to admit a bad experience there, so there is no shortage of them.

Come to the home birth section and get a thread asking the same thing the responses are more to the tune of 'well that's just weird". It is broadly assumed (highlighted very well by the very first reply in the thread!) that home birth is 'far far far better' than hospital birth.

It is less acceptable to admit a bad home birth experience which I dare say has something to do with the shortage of them, backed up by the fact I know 2 women who have been through it and feel that way.

I know it's supposed to be a place of support and 'healing' but personally I can see why someone wouldn't want to share their negative story here.

[NibbleCurlynBub]

:hugs::hugs: Trouble.

Thank you for sharing.

Your poor DD and poor YOU! At the very least (although I know it doesn't help) you could have done nothing to stop that from happening.

Thank goodness they were able to help her quickly. :yes:

:hugs:

I got what you meant JATS. I myself keep one thing here with me because of that.

[stellarella]

Trouble - wow that sounds horrendous. I'm surprised no one picked that up at any stage...that's pretty appalling.

JATS - fair enough, I see what you are saying.

We simply diverge on why....you see that the reason women don't post is because the stories are not as accepted....I don't see it that way...I see that it is because the complications and transfers and negative aspects of a HB are not experienced as traumatically as other types of births.

I see it like this because I am actively involved in the HB community and have noticed that in general women who HB are better equipped to work through the negatives....and that is because they feel more empowered in their experience.

However as I have also said previously....traumatic births do happen....and I have read about them :(

You point that there are fewer HBs than hospital births is obviously very true too!

[stellarella]

Here is the HB stories thread....

The first story on there is an epic labour with a transfer..

The third post down is a 59 hour posterior labour...

http://www.bubhub.com.au/community/forums/showthread.php?t=133623

[trouble]

I looked at the scans and in ultra sounds it did all look good, I dont think they could have picked it up.

But I may get shot for this comment, I hope not!

But I really wanted a homebirth, and was kinda upset that I wansnt going to get one, however after all this happened, I felt really really awful about myself, not just because of her injuries, but I more felt selfish, that I was planning a homebirth for me, and never really considered the slim possibility that my child may need emergancy care.

I dont want anyone to think that I am against homebirth, and if you did have one, I wouldnt be the one to say I told you so, because thats not what Im trying to say.

Im saying that for me!! my personal point of view for myself and my kids, is that I dont really have the guts anymore, and I dont really blame myself.

So please dont take offense.

[stellarella]

trouble - I don't take any offense to your post.

I'm not having HB just for me...it's as much for my baby as it is for me...in fact more so!

There is always the slim slim possibility of something going wrong, like in your case...but I really would much prefer to base my decisions on what is likely to occur....I really can't predict that tiny percentage of serious complications.

Having my baby at hospital doesn't guarantee me anything either....I can choose a HB based on the fact that it is more likely to be a normal hiccup free event...or I can choose hospital birth to try and insure myself against the tiny possibility of a serious mishap occurring.

What has happened with you is that fate intervened and your instincts told you something wasn't right....that is wonderful that you were able to listen to those and have your baby safely in hospital.

I think it's normal to have those thoughts when you have a traumatic experience.

[trouble]

trouble - I don't take any offense to your post.

I'm not having HB just for me...it's as much for my baby as it is for me...in fact more so!

There is always the slim slim possibility of something going wrong, like in your case...but I really would much prefer to base my decisions on what is likely to occur....I really can't predict that tiny percentage of serious complications.

Having my baby at hospital doesn't guarantee me anything either....I can choose a HB based on the fact that it is more likely to be a normal hiccup free event...or I can choose hospital birth to try and insure myself against the tiny possibility of a serious mishap occurring.

What has happened with you is that fate intervened and your instincts told you something wasn't right....that is wonderful that you were able to listen to those and have your baby safely in hospital.

I think it's normal to have those thoughts when you have a traumatic experience.


Well Im glad you didnt take offense to my post, I still dont have anything against home birth, and hope all goes well for you, and you have a tops experience. :)

And I agree, I think fate made her breech, to ensure I was in hospital.

[PunkyDiva]

I had an unassisted homebirth in March that didn't go exactly to plan but the worst was deciding to take bubs to hospital afterwards for check up.

I keep promising to write my birth up but haven't done it as yet :o

I don't class it as a bad birth even though what happened was quite serious and I wouldn't hesitate to homebirth again as otherwise it was everything and more then I had imagined.

[stellarella]

This is the sentiment I was trying to express in my previous posts Punky.

[~Emmylou~]

I think that fundamentally the reason you don't hear too many horror stories is because only about 250 women a year homebirth in Australia.

When you consider that the vast majority of the time everything goes smoothly (statistically this is borne out by transfer rates and mortality/morbidity rates) that only leaves a handful of women every year who have a bad experience. And not all of them want to post all over the internet ;)

In contrast 98% of women give birth in hospital - so the hospital horror stories are obviously much more prevalent.

That and the fact that homebirths are generally births that are less interfered with - so things just go right most of the time.

[Merla]

I think that fundamentally the reason you don't hear too many horror stories is because only about 250 women a year homebirth in Australia.


I actually dont think thats correct. According to the 2003 stastics 750 women planned a homebirth with a midwife in attendence, whilst there were numerous other unplanned homebirths.

However even saying that 750 is a much smaller number considering that 251,200 babies were born in australia that year.

So yes, you do have a good point that with higher numbers, there will be higher amount of unhappy mothers and familys. That said, the percentage of dissatisfied parents in hospitals is much higher that that of home-birthing parents. This may (as several of you have already stated) be because of unnessary medical intervention leading to an unsatisfying birthing experence, C-sections, or the general mindset of quite a few hospital birthing mothers (not picking on you).

Many homebirthers go into the birth experence with a positive attitude, and normally a good education (from your IM, Doula, or Hypnobirthing classes) on what to expect, what may happen, and how to own their own birth. So whilst unperfect things do happen at home-births (long labor, hospital transfers, emergency c-sections), the mothers are more likely to still be able to feel like they own their own birth and accomplished the great task that is birthing a baby (naturally or otherwise).

[~Emmylou~]

I actually dont think thats correct. According to the 2003 stastics 750 women planned a homebirth with a midwife in attendence, whilst there were numerous other unplanned homebirths.



Looking at the 2005 national data (which is the most recent we have) it was 600 (planned) ...so closer to your figure than mine!

That will teach me to post stats that I pull off the top of my head without checking them :D :p

At any rate, still a miniscule percentage of total births.

[mixy]

I would liek to add, that most women who homebirth make all the decions, and take responsability for them. Many women who birth in hospotial expect the OB to do everything to look after them, so when something goes wrong its the OB/ hospitals fault, where as with a IM women are able to take on the truma as theres, and so not need to blame anyone.
just a thought

and trouble i beleive, from what you have said, that you had the instincts telling you, that you needed to be in hospital. you made the right decition for your baby.

[La Que Sabe]

hi there, not suer if this thread is still going...but wanted to tell you a short version of my 'home birth' story.
you wanted the 'nasty stuff', to you this may not be nasty, but to me, it was traumatic as i wasn't prepared at all for it.

we had planned a HB right from the start, never ever even thought about the hospital!
when labour came, it was hard and fast right from the start, 2 minute contractions very ouchy.
got our midwife and we tried everything for 30 hours. in the end we had to make the decision to go to hospital
so we made our way down the freeway, took us abot an hour to get there.
i was hooked up to a drip because they thought i might be dehydrated. then after 2 hours i was given an epidural, which i didn't want but really had no choice as there wasn't much else apart from a c/section which we wanted to aviod for as lng as we could.
then i was given 2 rounds of syntocinon as baby was fine and i was fine.

still nothing happened. [sorry forgott omention, i got to 9cm but wouldn't dialate any further, so they were hoping with the syntocinon, i would dialte the extra cm and push her out].

then after 12 hours of being the hospital, we had to have a c/section.
i chose to be awake for it.
i feel traumatised because my DD [in my opinion] wasn't born, she was 'taken out of me' rather. i never experienced birth, and she was exposed straight away from darkness to bright lights and big unloving people poking her.
i also feel traumatised because the aneathatist [sp?] with out asking gave me morpheine and then another dose of it wihich made me pass out, when they took her our, so i missed her being taken out of me.
i hated it and i'm still dealing with it and feel terrible about it now.

she was fine, we both were fine tho and would have been if we had managed to birth at home, but she just wouldnt come out!!!

we discovered that the reason why i had so much trouble geting her out and why i had so much pain was not only because i wouldn't dialte that extra cm but also because she had her back to my back, rather than her back to my stomach.

so to you this may not be 'nasty' but to me it was. but i guess you've always got to be prepared for the not planned.
you may end up in hopsital, and that'so k, that's what they're there for. but you can do it at home. =]

[lilpearl]

The safety of birth relies a great deal on the environment a woman births in, as birth relies on a perfect hormonal interplay that is put out of wack by rushes of adrenaline that women experience when birthing in an environment that they feel threatned by (strangers, bright lights, antisceptic smell, etc, etc). Home is a safe haven, and the parasympathetic nervouse system can just take over, birth safely. Of course, occassionally, even a homebirth will have complications, but the chances are far less. Just by planing a homebirth, one decreases their risk of caesarean section to 4%, compared to insane statistics in most hospitals. If a woman planing a homebirth ends up with intervention/caesarean, she will not have as many doubts as to "was it really necessary". I'm sure 'bad' experiences are out there......but if a woman has a 'bad' homebirth, it's such a shame that people put a negative spin on the fact she chose homebirth, as I believe it to be such a wise decision. Women have dreadful experiences in hospitals, yet no one points the finger and says "well, you should have stayed at home, where birth is safer!". Birth is as safe as life, and place of birth needs to be decided bassed on where a woman is going to feel the most love and support. Women waiting two hours to see an obstetricain for five minutes is just not good enough. Women who plan homebirth wait five minutes to see their midwife for two hours, and it is this continuity of care which has been shown to be of great benifit to the health and wellbeing of mothers and babies, leading to better birth outcomes.

[MelissafromSyd]

I think it's fair to say that women who choose HB accept the risks associated with it, so that if something untoward does happen, they were aware that it could happen and have more information with which to make decisions about what to do. So even if something does go "wrong", the women feel empowered and therefore it is not such a negative experience.

[Duchessa]

To the OP, I have a story of a homebirth that went wrong. It wasn't my birth, my homebirth went perfectly (and I am one of those extraordinarly happy and content birthers that you mentioned in the OP), but it happened in my family home, when I was a child (about 8) and I remember it vividly. We were about 45 mins from the hospital and a friend of my parents who was a single mother wanted to birth there. She had hired an IM and my mother (a nurse at the time) was also a support person. She had a cord prolapse and the baby died. It was awful. It was one of those horrible freak things that probably wouldn't have mattered where she birthed, in hospital or under a bush. Sometimes they happen.

[AM]

I think it's fair to say that women who choose HB accept the risks associated with it, so that if something untoward does happen, they were aware that it could happen and have more information with which to make decisions about what to do. So even if something does go "wrong", the women feel empowered and therefore it is not such a negative experience.

I completely agree with this.

Although my first planned homebirth ended in transfer, and I was quite sad about it for a long time, I felt really pretty safe the whole time, and my IM bent over backwrads in hospital to make sure nothing was done we were not 100% happy with, and I ended up having a pretty straight foward vaginal birth.

I do wonder how it would all have ended had I been in hospy to begin with, as my second stage was incredibly long, probably/possibly a c/s...

I HAVE heard homebirth stories which have ended up being truly traumatic for the mother, they do definitely occur, but in pretty small numbers I'm happy to say.

It's like anything really, you can put all the plans in place and try to ensure everything will go swimmingly, but occasionally things simply turn pear shaped due to uncontrollable unforseen circumstances, but hey, that is all part of life, whether or not we are talking birth, or getting run over by a bus IYKWIM.

I guess homebirthers are usually just out to stack the odds extremely well in their favour that they will not have a bad experience, (ie staying OUT of the hospy environment if at all possible) and for most women it pays off, but I don't think anyone goes into a hb 'expecting' a bed of roses, the majority of hb'ers I know are extremely realistic about the fact that yes things can go wrong, but odds are, they won't.

I think a major part of homebirth planning is being very aware of what could potentially happen, and having firm game plans in place so it doesn't disintegrate into panic. Taking care of problems as they arise, and identifying when things really are at the stage that intervention is truly called for.

But, sometimes even the best laid plans can go awry.

[AM]

Jats - Anyone I know who has had a bad hb experience has been given huge amounts of support by the hb community, both IRL and online, I'm sad to hear these women have not experienced that :no:

I think hb'ers tend to analyse their births to the n'th degree trying to see what could perhaps have been done differently to give a possible better outcome, and perhaps make the next time even better, perhaps some of that 'analytical' behaviour came out when these women were relating their stories, and it was not appropriate... Anyway, I really feel for these women, as debriefing ANY birth in a safe and supportive environment is extremely important, and if it isn't able to be done, then the effects of the birth can linger a lot longer than necessary, and even intensify with time in some cases, which can have pretty devastating effects.

I hope these woman are in a place of peace about these births now.