Ex only texting or writing in book about DS

[Mum of one boy]

:no: I am sure some you ladies have the same problem I do. It's all to do with 'texting.' I actually wish the thing had never been invented now!

Anyway my ex sees his dad two days a fortnight. Never calls in between, has written in our communication book for our son (which was not my choice as I'm fine to talk to his dad on the phone or for a few mins when he picks our son up) that he hates me (quote).

My point is that my DS is 4 now and issues, like speech therapy are coming up, issues we have to communicate verbally about, I feel. And his dad continues to want me to text the info and homework we have to do with DS or write it in our book.

I would find it more natural and much better for our son if he would just communicate on the phone or in person. I don't want to pay anymore for texts plus I just feel it is him taking the lazy option and to be honest yes he just doesn't care anywere near as much as I do about DS.

I have decided to try and take control and am keeping the homework with me, as he's only at his dads two days per fortnight and am no longer going to write down our DS's achievments like swimming, toileting in the book. I feel his dad doesn't really care and I do it for myself more.

I feel his dad should call and speak to our son or me if he really wanted to find out things. I just don't want to be accused of not sharing things with his dad down the track.

Are there any other girls out there who have the same issue?? Ex's wont talk to them and communicate in this stupid way??

It's so hard when you have moved on, mind you my ex is remarried with a baby, and your ex still seems angry and wont move on.

please help.....wow sorry for the long rant but that actually helped writing it out

[SPC]

I only communicate with my FOB by email. I think he finds it less confronting and he gets more time to think about what he wants to say back.

Personally, I am determined to keep him as informed as possible. I don't want to ever be accused, by him, his family or my daughter, of impeding his relationship with her. I've done everything I can to make it as easy as possible for him to be involved and I'm determined to keep the moral high ground!

In the future your son may read these journals and make his own judgements. Don't let his father goad you into behaving badly. It sounds like he's trying to provoke you.

[silvercat]

Personally,I would consider communicating via text and a book far more productive then talking on the phone to my ex partner.We seldom resolve anything by talking as he seems more interested in scoring points against me then dealing with issues related to our child and its upsetting and pointless for all.I cant help feeling if your ex is telling you he hates you in the communication book,then it could only be worse person to person.And at least you have documentation of his immaturity should you ever need it.

[MommaBear]

my ex started texting wanting to know bout DD, but for him he would text only when his GF was at work and i got sick of the constant texts etc... after talking to my lawyer about it, i told him i would no longer be conversing with him in regard to DD via text as i think its disrespectful to DD and he can pick up the phone and call or arrange a time to see us if he wants to chat about how shes going etc......

to me texting is kinda lazy- yeah its good if ya really dont wanna talk to each other or cant talk without arguing but i dont like texting bout DD.

[our little treasures]

I only communicate with my FOB by email. I think he finds it less confronting and he gets more time to think about what he wants to say back.

Personally, I am determined to keep him as informed as possible. I don't want to ever be accused, by him, his family or my daughter, of impeding his relationship with her. I've done everything I can to make it as easy as possible for him to be involved and I'm determined to keep the moral high ground!

In the future your son may read these journals and make his own judgements. Don't let his father goad you into behaving badly. It sounds like he's trying to provoke you.
It's so refreshing reading such a responsible post:thumbsup: You sound like you have your childs best interests at heart:goodvibes:

[indigoin0z]

i am not single [yet], but have been dealing with the technicalities of doing so for a longtime now..

& i personally chose for a communication book because it does indeed record things which is good for many reasons...
exactly what singlepregnantchick mentioned.. writing email & or communication book can only be a good thing if the goal is to stay on the issues of the child/ren.. keeps the unnecessary emotions/venting out of the way.. i said to my H 'take that sh!t to your counsellor'


the txting would p me off a bit tho... if it was about anything in depth..