Help!! Tantrum

[BiNdI86]

I know there are a lot of threads about Tantrums but I need help!!

For the past month my 18 month old has been throwing the BIGGEST tantys ever...OVER NOTHING. She goes all wobbly when I try to pick her up and lays on the floor and bangs her hands, she kicks at me and hits and pinches and screams and crys for ages. I don't know what to do or how to handle it.

I have a really short temper and when she starts I freeze and don't know how to help her calm down without myself getting upset. I get soo frustrated. I am trying to talk to her to calm her down but she is too young to reason with...

PLEASE HELP!!

[rynosmum]

Mine did the same. I would let him do the major head-banging etc and then cuddle him as he relaxed a little.

We cut preservative 282 out of his diet though and never looked back. He only ever had another tanty like this when we went away for a weekend and he was exposed to it again.

[tanni_83]

what type of things do u find that preservative in ?

[rynosmum]

It's in most breads and bakery items. It's to prevent mould growing in breads etc.

Sunblest and Wonder White are free from it as are Brumby's breads. Fruit loaf is a definite no-no and that's what DS used to have for brekky.:o

[Chickadee]

We now buy Noble Rise which is also free of 282.

I agree with Rynosmum. Ignore the tantrum and don't try to offer cuddles or any touches until they calm down. Distraction is also a good strategy. If she throws a tantrum don't make a big deal of it but just try getting out a favorite toy, activity (or food if the time is right) and either ask if she'd like to join in or just quietly set it up near her and start yourself. You might be able to interrupt her full blown tantie, or you may have to wait till she starts to calm down on her own. It's important though that the distraction is not a reward for the tantrum, so dont' talk about them in relation to each other.

If you're out somewhere you can do the same ignoring & distraction routine if it works at home, just stand near her to wait it out and don't worry about what anyone else thinks.

[BiNdI86]

thanks for the responses ladies!! :thumbsup:

I will try not to draw attention to her tantrums now and i just relised that the bread i just brought has 282 in it, as I usually buy deb's bakery bread...I should have checked the packet more thourougly (sp?)

I have tried walking away and doing something else....but she follows me and screams in my face, as if to say " mum!!! I'm having a tanty....LOOK AT ME!!" :gloomy:

Is there anything else you guys cut out of your little ones diet? Are there any more other 'nastys' in food I should try to exclude??

:yes: Any help is appreciated :yes:

[Elfin]

There is a great website called www.fedupwithfoodadditives.info which is really good and has heaps of advice about diet. It sounds like you are doing all the right things. If you feel yourself getting frustrated just pop your baby in her cot and just go outside for a minute, you will feel a bit better.

I have a chronic tantrumer as well, some kids are just like this and they get better with age, around 3 things get a lot better so hang in there. It is usually about frustration and the inability to communicate their needs. If you are out shopping just avoid eye contact with people, most people especially other parents understand what you are going through.

[BiNdI86]

thank you so much easterlily for the site. I WILL be looking at that one tonight!!

thanks everyone for your words of wisdom.

I find it hard to let her go in public, because I'm young. everyone looks as if i'm murdering my DD and that it must be me that is doing something wrong and neglecting my child. But i'm gonna let her go next time......Stuff them all I say!! :thumbsup:

[Chickadee]

Bindi it's true that people will stare if DD chucks a tantrum when you're out. But I think there will always be people who stare and disapprove no matter how you handle it. If you try to shush her and she hits you, they will judge you. If you stand your ground and ignore it, they will judge you. So ignore them and do what works best for you and your DD.

If it helps, I was grocery shopping one day and watched helplessly as a mum had to deal with her child's tantrum. He was 7 or 8 and went full out onto the floor, screaming. An entire line of people stared at him, and at her as she calmly went on with her shopping. I felt like going up to them all and telling them to mind their own damn business. But anyways... you are far from alone in having to deal with it and there will usually be one or two sympathetic parents who will just smile and nod at you :)

[BiNdI86]

Thank you for your support MarthaM.
I will ignore them and handler her tantrum as I see fit.

We will see tonight, as we are going late night shopping. DD and I have had a really bad 'tanty' day!!

I don't know where I'd be without Bubhub!! :o