Do you ever feel like...

[Ana Gram]

a less attractive prospect for a relationship because you have a child?

[Benji]

For men my age, definitely. They're more out for "fun" from what I have learned lately.

Nothing stops the oldies from having a go, however :(

[Freya]

I did when I first had Kaid, but then after I started to receive quite a bit of male attention I realized that any guy who was phased by me having a baby is not someone I wanted to have anything to do with... I actually didn't come across any though.

[Mum2Bug]

Yep. i find it puts men off that I have to stop and find babysitters and cant just spontaneously take off out for the night and im not as "out there" to have fun anymore (not that i really ever got into clubbing or anything)

[SimplyMum]

Definately. Although, I found this was more my own hang up than anyone else's. The guy I'm seeing doesn't seem to mind- although there are still hurdles.
I kinda of figure- would I want to date someone with a ready made family? Nope- so why would anyone else?
And I certainly wouldn't want it for my own child/ren so than I start thinking what 'his' parents/family/friends might be thinking.

[Bewitched]

When i had DD at 18 i thought it was amazing guys didn't seem phased by it and still wanted a relationship with me, what i didn't work out until after they all took off was - it was only me they were interested in :( So in answer to your question i think YES to younger guys more than older ones.

[Myztiks#1Fan]

yes i do. i didnt have much time and nobody who i could rely on to look after coop for such a long time that it was really hard to even contemplate getting back into the dating game. but now, i have met someone just going to see where it goes. he obviously doesnt mind otherwise he would of said something by now i am sure and because he was the one who first said he wanted to get to know me more and yeah.

[Ana Gram]

I kinda of figure- would I want to date someone with a ready made family? Nope- so why would anyone else?


That is exactly what I have been thinking. It sounds awful but I don't want to date a man who has a child because I already have to deal with one "spirited" child.

[Freya]

That is exactly what I have been thinking. It sounds awful but I don't want to date a man who has a child because I already have to deal with one "spirited" child.

Yes, Don't!!

It is hell.

[Myztiks#1Fan]

That is exactly what I have been thinking. It sounds awful but I don't want to date a man who has a child because I already have to deal with one "spirited" child.

yeah i think i would find it hard to date someone with a child as well. coop is full on most days and thats hard enough. if someone did ever come along and they did have a child and it worked out, well so be it but it would be hard

[Bewitched]

It sounds awful but I don't want to date a man who has a child because I already have to deal with one "spirited" child.

That doesnt sound awful, sounds normal to me! I think being a step parent would have to be one of the hardest jobs ever, it makes sense to tread carefully ;)

[lukaelmo]

That is exactly what I have been thinking. It sounds awful but I don't want to date a man who has a child because I already have to deal with one "spirited" child.

I'm actually the opposite, I'd be really hesitant to date someone without a child because they wouldn't be able to understand as well as someone with one. If that makes any sense.

Ummm and does having a child put guys off me? I don't know. I am not sure that I care all that much. My kids are very easy, low maitenance boys, and I think they make life a bit more fun. Taking them to soccer and stuff, I like it.

They already have a great dad, so they don't need a father figure. I think for a casual relationship it would be all good. As for living together and all that... yeah, that will present some difficulties. I have my own house that I love, and don't know if I'd share my space too well. Nor can I see myself moving.

I would like someone though. I get lonely in the evenings.

[RmumR]

Yep. i find it puts men off that I have to stop and find babysitters and cant just spontaneously take off out for the night and im not as "out there" to have fun anymore (not that i really ever got into clubbing or anything)


:iagree:Yep this is how i feel too.

[supa_star323]

I think about this every day and yes I definitely feel that it puts a lot of guys off. I find that any guy that shows an interest in me is either much older, like 15 years, or just interested in sex. I also find that a lot of guys say it doesn't phase them, but then get annoyed when I can't do something cause I have no one to watch DS. Or they expect to just jump in and be an instant family.
Or maybe I just attract the losers... lol

[OneNowOneLater]

I think this is why i'm really hesitant in trying to find a guy. I dont want anyone to see me as an "instant family" even though, in reality, thats what we all are (to a degree anyway).

I dont want to risk getting hurt again, not to mention J's wellbeing is more important, and i don't want to introduce some guy to her, let her get attached, if he's just gonna leave anyway, cos i dont want any more kids, with anyone. Why would any guy (looking for an instant family, and want kids of his own at some point) stay for that? One kid, thats not even his and not getting any others.... Does that make sense?

[Teley]

I also find that a lot of guys say it doesn't phase them, but then get annoyed when I can't do something cause I have no one to watch DS. Or they expect to just jump in and be an instant family.


:iagree:. And it's not because you attract losers supa_star, that's just how it tends to be!

I find that I get a lot of guys initially interested in me, even sincerely from what I believe, but being all around the 20-age group, they expect that I can go hang with them after uni or go clubbing with them on Saturday night or organise a coffee on the spur of the moment...it just doesn't happen:no:. Sorry mate, I already have a little one in my life.

And I'm over dating guys now, honestly. Seems like it's a forever I'm over it too:p!