When why how???

[sockstealingpoltergeist]

Just doing a survey about Controlled Crying.
Was wondering what age you CC'd, Why you CC'd, and what method of CC you used, if it worked and why you used it? Thanks
This is not a bag out the CC users thread.:)

[sockstealingpoltergeist]

I'll add mine. I CC'd my boy at about 6 mths onwards. Have had to do it several times and it has worked really well for us.

I use a gentle method of CC. Most people these days do. I make sure my son is calm and happy when he goes to bed. Sometimes when there is nothing wrong with him and he is tired he still wants to be up and playing, and he cries to come out of his cot.
I just head on in and pick him up pat him or rock him and sing to him untill he settles back down and I put him into bed. I just repeat this step as many times as is needed and usually after a 1 or 2 times now he puts himself to sleep. If he puts himself to sleep he sleeps so much better.:)
He will not sleep in our bed with us he just plays and plays.

[TeganRheana]

I started CC'ing my first when he was 7 months old. I just used to put him to bed awake, if he cried, i'd go in there, lay him back down, put his dummy in say "goodnight its sleep time" then walk out. He would cry, but usually only for a few minutes, there of course were the odd occassions when he would go on and on and on but I just kept repeating the process. If I thought he was thirsty I would offer him warm water in his bottle instead of milk and soon enough he stopped waking throughout the night. I also put my second in his cot from the moment we got home from the hospital, he has been sleeping through the night since he was 3 months old so we haven't had too many problems with him however if he does wake during the night, I do the same thing...go in there, lay him back down, give him his dummy and say "goodnight its sleep time". We never have any troubles with either of them going to bed now. They both go to bed around 6-6:30pm and wake around the same the next morning but won't call out until around 8am..both just talking to themselves and taj reads (views haha) his books.

[Benji]

DS was 9 months old and wouldn't sleep for longer than 20 minutes.

I would rock him to sleep and put him in his cot. He would always wake up the second I put him down.

I put a nightlight in the room (he was still in my room) and I sat next to him in my bed, he had lullabyes on and yes, he cried, but it only took from memory a few nights.

He changed pretty much overnight. It didn't change our bond or relationship in the slightest but he went from being grumpy, tired, sooky to happy, healthy, faster developing little boy.

People accuse me of doing it for my own benefit, no but it did help - I did it purely for him.

[Littletreasures]

i did CC with DS when he was 4 months old as i was having to go back to work and DH couldnt get him to sleep, it only took him 3 days and he was perfect, i went in to him every 2 mins and calmed him down and he only ever cried for about 20 -30 mins (i was going in every 2)

with DD i tried it a couple of times before 6 months and she just didnt get it but at 8 months we went to a day stay clinic and have had success finally, she only ever fed to sleep and would only stay asleep so long as she was using me as a dummy which was fine until DS started to get up to no good when DD was asleep and i couldnt to anything to stop him otherwise i would wake DD so it just had to stop.

i now have 2 healthy happy children who know when its bed time and will happily fall asleep by them self and i am much happier and have alot more time for DH..

[Cordelia]

I control cried DD at 10 months. It would take 3 hours at night for me to rock her to sleep. It just wasn't working adn I was suffering from PND. It took 2 nights of hours of screaming but by the third night she didn't make a sound. She sleeps a good 12 hours now and DH nad I get some time to ourselves and we're all feeling really good.

I have to say that the routine before going to bed is really important. And ensuring that she goes to bed at the same time every night. And her sleep aid is her blanky which she can't go to sleep without, but as soon as its' in her hand and against her face her eyes are dropping off.

[sockstealingpoltergeist]

I have to say - I really prefer gentle CC. I can also understand why CC is a must for some parents, and I don't think anyone has the right to judge.
I think alot of people do not understand the benifit of CC or the way many people practice it. I did not think it was a good thing for little babies as they do not understand and are crying for a reason. My son is 2 and he is only crying because he wants to come out and play when he really really needs sleep. When he sleeps properly he is so much happier- we all are.:)

[forbetoel]

16 months, and just for the one night.

[guerin]

I believe I cc'd my daughter inadvertantly very early that is in hospital. This was due to slight deafness and the fact all these other babies would cry that when asleep it took a lot to wake me. Therefore a few times I was told by the nurses that she had been crying when they woke me but only for 5 minutes.

Having said that I have no doubt I would have started from the first night if she seemed to need it. Reason for this is what I now consider the best advice I was given by my mother. That advice being start out how you mean to continue on. If you mean for your DD to sleep in her own cot don't start her off in your bed. If you mean not to rock and pat her to sleep, don't start off doing it. She also pointed out that babies learn very quickly, if you start them off in their own cot and in their own room that is then normal for them and they know no difference it only becomes cruel when you start them off in your bed in your room and then change it. If you start off going in and rocking as soon as they cry when put to bed they expect it. If you start of not going in as soon as they cry or if going in not rocking them they then accept that and their happy with it.

So this is probably controversial but I believe that if your going to control cry you do so from day 1. I honestly think trying to start it from 3 months, 4 months is far more traumatic for your child as he/she has been conditioned by you to expect something else. When he/she is born everything is new, nothing is conditioned so if you put them in their own room from first night home that is what they will see as normal. If you cc slowly from first night i.e 5 minutes crying then just dummy no talking then they will see that as normal not cruel.

Yes my DD went into her own room and her own cot from the first night. This will be her room for as long as we are in this house. She didn't sleep with me I did not sleep in the room. I have never rocked her to sleep although I cuddle her a lot when awake and out of bed. I have never given her toys in bed, I have never patted her bum to get her to sleep. I simply and have always simply wrapped at first with arms in then after 3 weeks arms out from learning she does not like it and if that is what she wants and she is ok with it then fine. Given her a kiss said good night, pulled the side up on the cot then left the room. If she was whingy I put the dummy in her mouth no patting, no rocking, no shushing leave the room. The first month she only woke up once during the night and that was for a feed. After that she slept through the night.

I want to point out that she was a 9lb'r and from what I have heard they are more settled but I honestly believe my mums advice was extremely good I also believe the longer you leave things the more you conditioned your child to expect one thing and the harder you will find to change it to another thing.

But no doubt she will complety change next month and want I look a fool.

[SassyMummy]

I used CC, but I didn't know that's what it was, nor did I follow a "method." I just made it up... it just came to me naturally.

She was probably about 5 months, and I was sick of co-sleeping (for a while there, she slept in her capsule or pram beside the bed because she wouldn't sleep in a cot) because she'd wake up every 2 seconds and whinge...

I'd put her in there, stand there and rub her gently while she cried. I'd comfort her, but without picking her up.

That's pretty much it really.

[Benji]

I did not think it was a good thing for little babies as they do not understand and are crying for a reason.

Yeah, usually because they're tired :laughing:

Kidding, no I don't think it's good for very very young babies either but then again some mothers swear by it. :)

[guerin]

I started CC'ing my first when he was 7 months old. I just used to put him to bed awake, if he cried, i'd go in there, lay him back down, put his dummy in say "goodnight its sleep time" then walk out. He would cry, but usually only for a few minutes, there of course were the odd occassions when he would go on and on and on but I just kept repeating the process. If I thought he was thirsty I would offer him warm water in his bottle instead of milk and soon enough he stopped waking throughout the night. I also put my second in his cot from the moment we got home from the hospital, he has been sleeping through the night since he was 3 months old so we haven't had too many problems with him however if he does wake during the night, I do the same thing...go in there, lay him back down, give him his dummy and say "goodnight its sleep time". We never have any troubles with either of them going to bed now. They both go to bed around 6-6:30pm and wake around the same the next morning but won't call out until around 8am..both just talking to themselves and taj reads (views haha) his books.

I noticed you did the same thing I do that is if any problems dummy in and a simple good night this is what I have always done and like you my daughter also wakes up and before she fully calls out she talks to herself. I know this because when I wake up I make my husbands lunch and breakfast with a cup of tea and I also make myself a coffee which I have whilst looking at the net in the office next to Dd bedroom. So it looks like you do exactly what I do with exactly the same results.

/A rested child leads to a rested Mum
//A rested Mum leads to a happy Mum
///A happy Mum leads to a happy child.

[Adnileb]

Hi Im new to BubHub!
I am going to start control comforting for my 10mth old very soon. He has a slight cold so i was waiting for that to end before starting. I am also changing his breastfeeds so he is fed about half an hour before bed and not just before bed, hoping this will help as well.

Just wondering, after i start the CC, which i presume i should start in the evening sleep, what happens when/if he wakes at middnight... do i just do what i did earlier that night i.e comfort him and then wait 5 mins, comfort, wait etc. God im going to be like a zombie:sleeping:. Hope i dont forget and just breastfeed him back to sleep...:shame:
Thanks, Belinda

[Ange&Seth]

Yeah, usually because they're tired :laughing:

Kidding, no I don't think it's good for very very young babies either but then again some mothers swear by it. :)

I started fairly early though I can't remember at what age exactly ( I voted under 6 weeks). Mine was out of sheer exhaustion and frustration. I rang mum and asked how old a baby had to be before I could let him cry and she said 'as early as you know they have a clean bum and a full tum'.

The first time I did was so I could have a shower. I was barely in the shower long enough to get wet LOL - maybe 2 mins at most and when I hopped out he was fast asleep. He was only crying from tiredness.

I think alot of the time the misconception about controlled crying is that we leave our kids in distress and neglect or ignore their needs which isn't the truth at all. Every time I went in to him I checked that he didn't have wind, or a wet/dirty nappy, or was hungry etc etc.

I also like to refer to what we do/did as controlled comforting. Quite often all it takes is for me to go in, sit on the bed and give DS a quick cuddle for a minute then he says 'bed mum nigh-night' and puts himself to sleep.

[Leisa21]

I started getting him to self settle last Wednesday.

It was getting to the point that even when we co slept he was waking up every hour and needed the breast to get back to sleep and he only had two 30minute sleeps per day:hair:. Also I was BFing every 1 1/2 during the day. So Wednesday I focused on 4 hourly Breastfeeds with 3 solid meals. It worked great. I rocked him to sleep which was hard as he was only ever fed to sleep.

On Friday I had his feeds down pat so I started patting him to sleep. All day Friday I patted him to sleep and by Friday night it was a simple one minute pat and he was asleep. He slept right through from 7:30pm - 5:30am:smiliedance:. I continued the patting on Saturday and then Sunday I decided to use CC for his morning sleep. He cried for 3 mins, I went in and said Mummy loves you darling its time to go back to sleep. He cried for 5 minutes then settled for 2 minutes then cried for 2 minutes and was off to sleep. I did that for all his sleeps during Sunday including Sunday night. It took no longer than 10 minutes and he was only crying for 5 mins of that.

Yesterday I put him down and within 2 minutes with no crying just some sooking he was asleep. He has started sleeping for longer during the day and last night he slept from 7pm to 6am:smiliedance:. I'm so glad I did it for him. I always said I would never use CC and I would also demand feed. I thought it was selfish that mothers would use CC. Now I realise its not for us its for them. Because my son was relying on boob. He's sleep cycles last 40 minutes so he was waking up every 40 minutes and after 20 minutes of failed settling he was on the boob. Now in 24 hours he is only having 5 breast feeds and he is alreading knocking out one of them. We are actually closer than ever before. I dont get frustrated with him and I have more energy to play with him during the day and he is soooooo settled and a lot more content.

Thats my story so I obviously voted on the 6-12 months.

[GummyBear]

I never did controlled crying in a strict, timed sense.

From 6 weeks I taught DS to self-settle, watching for his tired signs, wrapping him and putting him down.

If he cried (and naturally, he did) I would go back in after a bit and pat him, rock his basinette. If he was still going after 15 mins, I would pick him up and walk and cuddle him, then try again.

Within two weeks we could put him down for his sleep and he would grizzle for less than a minute.

[the dargonfly faery]

We followed pretty much the same method as GummyBear, started at around 6 weeks i think. She now is a perfect sleeper, put her down for sleep and no cry much at all.

[TeganRheana]

I used CC, but I didn't know that's what it was, nor did I follow a "method." I just made it up... it just came to me naturally.

This is exactly the same as me. I didn't even know what CC was....I just did what I felt I should do, and it worked out for me!!! I always believe its best to do what works for ourselves and our family -after all they are our children and others may object to it, but thats their problem...not ours!!!

guerin:
/A rested child leads to a rested Mum
//A rested Mum leads to a happy Mum
///A happy Mum leads to a happy child.

I completely agree!!! And yes, it does sound as though we have been doing the same thing!! I personally think its awesome that I can put my boys to bed awake and have no worries - they fall asleep by themselves and they wake up by themselves and keep themselves entertained until I get them up in the morning....they always make me so proud when we have people over because everyone who has been over when its bedtime always comments on how well behaved they are during the night/bedtime!!!

[GirlGerms]

I started at 6 weeks, like others, out of sheer frustration. It worked, as long as she really was tired (which in the beginning, took a bit of manipulating daytime sleeps etc). She's now 3 months old and a good sleeper.

Like most people in this thread, we did it gently and it worked within a few days. Now she self settles and sleeps anywhere, any time. Couldn't be happier.