Confessions of a bad mum

[BaDaBing]

Hi there...

I am just wondering if there is anybody out there like me....


Does anybody else worry about missing out on spending precious time with your baby??

I have two boys Ethan 3yrs in Aug and Brodie 6 months. :) I'm studying commerce at Uni internally and externally and at times I feel like I'm neglecting my boys and that I don't spend enough quality time with them. :thumbsdown: I also feel like I can overreact at little things :devil6: when I am stressing out trying to meet due dates and then I feel sick that I have lost my temper.

SOmetimes its a such a nightmare trying to keep up with everything, hubby, kids, housework, study, catching up with friends. I feel like my husband is always coming home to a mess but at the same time I feel like if I was to drop in on anyone of my friends homes no doubt their house would be immaculate.

Its all so hard! I feel like I'm constantly struggling to be organised and then I will throw my hands defeated and cry.

Being a parent is such a hard job albeit wonderful. Some days I look back and yearn for the days with where I had less weight and responsibilities on my shoulders.

Thanks for letting me pour my heart out :ecomcity: I feel a little better.

[Jackson84]

i know what you mean, sharn.

i find it really hard too, and often feel like there are days where i get nothing done at all! sometimes i am so stressed i 'lash out' - when DS is being particularly trying, or when DH is being a 'brat' (LOL). i know it's wrong, and out of anger, but it is so incredibly hard.

most people just don't understand. my sister once told me that she doesn't really like coming to my house because it is 'always messy', she then told me that she and her husband pay somebody to clean their house! well, it must be nice for a couple of DINKs!

sometimes i do feel bad about putting DS in day care so that i can go to uni, but i remind myself that whilst it is hard now, it will be better in the long run. also, i need some time away from him, otherwise i just go insane!

don't worry - you're certainly not alone!

[BaDaBing]

Oh I'm so glad to hear that i'm not the only one out there feeling a little inadequate at times.

I'm hearin you on the sister front.... my sister is single with no kids and makes me feel like we are a nightmare to be around and that she can't wait to get out the door half the time.

I agree about the daycare thing too. My eldest goes two days a week and even tho I try and do fun things like going to the park or swimming when he is home I'm am grateful that he is being entertained and doing crafty things etc when in care as it takes the complete onus of me a little bit when he is at home. I feel like I appreciate him much more when I have that time away from him. :hugs:

Bring On GRADUATION!!! :smiliedance:

[Jackson84]

haha. yes and no for me. :) i love being at uni - i love learning and studying, and even sometimes the assignments :eek: which is why i sometimes feel extra bad ('selfish'). i have a couple more years to go after i finish my bachelor (i am doing a dip ed). but i am hoping when i have finished having babies, and they are all a bit older, i can go back and get a second degree :)

i also find that i appreciate DS more on days that i am with him too. although it is impossible to study when he is around! i wait till DH gets home to do my work. :)

on the sister front - i love her dearly, but when she started talking about my house being messy i was thinking, 'oh, wouldn't it be nice to be able to come home from work and do some vacuuming without waking the baby! or to not have a baby running around throwing toys all over the floor!" i was actually quite proud of how clean i managed to keep my house LOL

[anna's mum]

Yes, I too have the messiest house around ... But juggling full-time studying & all the childcare/housework is hard work! I feel like I never get a chance to relax ...

About being a 'bad' mum - definitely hands up! I have never ever done anything crafty with my dd, & when we do have our day and a half together during the week, I've got to do the cleaning, the grocery shopping, & run errands ... I think I'm not the most maternal type, but I do love her :)

[Jackson84]

i feel so productive! i have vacuumed, hung out washing, brought in washing, folded the washing AND put it away! i have done grocery and fruit&veg shopping, and i have built a cubby in our lounge room with DS!!! :D

does any body else think i am avoiding my assignment that is due on monday? LOL

[BaDaBing]

I know what you mean, I tell you my kitchen cupboards are never cleaner than at exam/assignment time:laughing: This is always something that needs doing.. if I just do that then I'll start and then oops something else just needs doing.

Cubby house in the lounge, what a great idea. We might try that one today!!

I know what is like not to feel maternal thats for sure but I think I'm getting better. We made a reward chart the other day and I went and got some pale blue cardboard and we stuck cotton balls on it for fluffy clouds and I got green tissue paper and we rolled it up in little balls and stuck it down the bottom of the cardboard for the grass/hills. I then went and bought little dinosaur and aboriginal design stickers (frogs, lizards, snakes, birds, bugs) and I let my son choose a sticker when he is a good boy at night time and put it anywhere on the chart he likes. It is so working. Anyway I just thought that was an easy pezy craft idea for you Anna's mum.

We can't all be the perfect soccer mums you know with the flash cards and the crafty activities etc, but knowing that we love our kids more than anything is good enough. Thats all they care about.:hugs: