Honest opinions please...

[BlueGin]

hi all, I would like to put our situation to you all and just see what the general feelings/opinions are, as we are getting grief from family and can't tell what's right or wrong anymore.
Here goes;
I am 25 this year, with 2 more years at uni after this. Hubby is turning 28 with a full-time secure job he loves, but not a massive paycheque (it barely supports us when I am not earning, so would need more to care for a bub).
We love the thought of starting a family now when I have so many breaks in my days, sometimes at uni I am only there for a couple of hours, and many lecturers are kid friendly there. It would also be great having the massive uni holidays.
As I have mentioned in other threads, we have conception issues which mean that I should try to have children young, as in a few years I would probably need IVF.
We want 4 children if possible, once I finish my course I intend to work part-time while the kids are home, then full time when they are at school... my husband is able to choose his days off so can have them mid-week.
So those are the facts,
I would like to know if you all think it is selfish to want to start a family now, when we wont have a great deal of money, and when I can only be home 2.5 days during the week, and hubby 2 days? (other day/half day the baby would either be with family or in my uni childcare).
Thanks for taking the time to read this, I hope you will all be comfortable answering honestly, and feel free to ask any questions at all that might help you answer.
TO clarify a possible confusion: I cannot defer my course as I already did this when I moved and the uni will not let me do it again.
Best wishes to all,

Gin

[Mischief]

Gin,

I dont think you are selfish at all for wanting to start a family now when you dont have much money!

As long as you have enough to put the food on the table and pay the bills....if you can live happily with that, then that is all that counts!

I was brought up by my grandparents....mum is now 60 and dad is 80, so when I came into the world they were 38 and 58.....They owned a fish and chip shop in Sydney and never had much money.

Most of my life mum and dad (grand parents) lived a veterens pension and wives pension from dads time in WW2.

I never had the newest toys or the best toys but I knew that everything they gave me was with love. So i didnt have the newest barbie doll, but the $2 one from the Salvos ment more than the $30 one the rich girl in my class had, because I knew mum and dad has spent money they didnt have on my doll! I learned to make my own fun....tyre swings...climbing trees...etc! :)

Dont stress...just do what feels right...it might even take a little while for you to fall pregnant, so dont stress....have fun, and when its the right time it will happen!!!!

[Rell]

No you are not selfish. You should be able to have kids when it is right for you and your husband. Remember financialy you will be able to get help from the govenment, which when on one incone is quite significant. If you want to check out what you would be entiltled to you can go to www.familyassist.gov.au or ph 136150. My husband and I decided to have kids young and yes the kids aren't dressed in desiner clothes but they do get a lot of love and attention. The decision is for you and your husband so go for it.

[BlueGin]

Thankyou for replying so positively, and from personal experience :)
It is nice to hear other people saying things that we think ourselves, it has given me that extra support I need to make my own decision on this.
I really appreciate the time you have taken.
In saying that, if anyone does feel that they have a less positive answer, don't feel that you can't post it here.

Thanks again guys, I will be testing on the weekend ( a bit early, but who can help it?) and I will let you know :D

[BlueGin]

Thanks for the link, I had no idea that the family tax benefits were something that could be recieved by everyday people, I just thought they were yearly tax breaks for people earning lots of money! That money would sure come in handy for peace of mind.

[Rell]

I will keep my fingers crossed on the weekend for you.

[Rainbowbrite]

I say go for it. I'm only 25, hubby is 30 and we believe this is the best time (for us anyway). Hubby does not make a fortune but we think we'll survive. Have your family when your ready, ignore everyone else. We did and i love it :D

Rainbowbrite

[Moorish]

Hi Gin,
Absolutely 100% you're not selfish. In fact you'd probably be robbing yourself of your dream for a large family if you decided to wait (if the docs are right).
The situation you described i.e. Kid friendly lecturers, you home 2.5 days, hubby home 2 days and family for support on the extra day, is probably a better arrangement than some people who arn't lucky enough to have any flexibility in jobs/work or have no family support.
Should you be pregnant right now (fingers crossed and I ALWAYS tested early - I was never patient!) you baby is going to have a stable routine, the majority of the time being home and spending quality time with both his/her mum & dad raising him/her, and one really fun day a week at "nannie & pa's" house! I can't see why any child wouldn't adapt well to this situation at all.
There's nothing to say that once you decide to have kids that the woman's life is over. And money should have nothing to do with it. When I made the choice to leave work and have babies (and more babies) the loss of my income (as little as it was - around $25,000) was hard. We had some hard times - hubby and I don't ever do things by 1/2's, and we bought our first house, semi-renovated it, upgraded our car and learned hard and fast the bills associated with owning your own home. Then an absolute blessing came to us in the way of a hard earned promotion for my hubby at work (not a huge pay increase, but anything was welcome. All this happened during the last 3 months of my first pregnancy.
My kids don't dress in the designer clothes (although who can resist a 50% off sale at Pumpkin Patch) but I've learned that hand-me downs from friends are a blessing and K-mart & target are becoming quite trendy (so's the price!) I always shop big in the clearances for the next summer/winter - I might spend $200 at once but that's a whole wardrobe for 2 kids for 3/4 of the year.
Maybe your family needs to change their perspective a little and instead of thinking of how to fit a family around uni, fit uni around the family.
Anna
P.S> good luck for the exam TOMORROW!!!

[RuthK]

Hi Gin

You said that you welcomed opinions that were not necessarily supportive of having a baby now. If you don't mind, I'll try and use the benefit of my experiences and help you on this front.

I think you need to seriously ask yourself a few questions before you embark on having a baby right now:

1. Do you want to be in the position of finishing off assignments and cramming for exams when you might have been up all night with a sick child and feel like death (believe me, they choose to be sick at the most inappropriate moments);
2. Are you prepared to give up ALL your spare time? A lot is taken up by baby, but add study to that and you'll have no time to yourself whatsoever;
3. If you find the baby is really making study impossible are you really willing to give up the course, seeing as your can't defer it?;
4. Do you really want to be tight financially, or would you like to be able to see a lovely outfit in Pumpkin Patch and buy it on a whim, not having to say no due to financial constraints?
5. Is the career you will be in once you've finished your course congusive to working part-time from the beginning?

I had my children in my 30's, 10 years after finishing uni and just after finishing my post-grads. I never realised the amount of your time a baby consumes. There is no way I could have managed study and motherhood. You hear of women you have managed it, but at what cost? If you only have a year or two of your course left do you think you might be better off waiting to try to get pregnant until you're in your final year because once you're baby comes along you wont want study or anything else deamnding your time, just precious time with your baby.

I do hope you make the best choice for you.

R

[BlueGin]

Rell, I am betting I will test on Saturday morning (as soon as the supermarket opes) so be prepared for a very early post!

Rainbowbright, thanks for the support, it sounds like you have a wonderfully loving family, I hope we manage to turn out the same!

Anna, (my Thursday post buddy! :p ), we sound a lot like you guys, always jump in with both feet! In saying that, we have always been able to make ends meet, I guess that is how it works when you put your whole heart into something!

Hi Ruth, I appreciate your honesty, and those questions have given me a lot to think about. Some I would need to think about more before knowing my answer, but some have been on my mind for so long that I already know how I feel; If worst came to worst and I couldn't enjoy motherhood while at uni, then ultimately the uni would be off, though I hope that doesn't happen, as I have found that the older I get, the harder all those assignments seem to be! :eek: In saying that, if we decide to wait till after uni it would ultimately mean waiting 3 years (so that I could have a years working behind me) before I would be elligable for maternity leave. That puts me at 28/29 and would probably mean only being able to have 2 kids. My work would be primary teaching, and sadly at the moment a lot of graduates end up with part-time jobs as the real shortage is in high schools. I have enquired with the teaching board and they require 80days of teaching before your trial year is up, so that should be fine.
Spare time, well I am not much of a social butterfly these days (sadly!) and as a couple we generally just hang together and enjoy things like market shopping, chatting with my family (my parents, 3 big brothers and their wives) and taking the occasional (maybe once a year) trip to NSW to see hubby's folks. So in that sense the only thing i will have to make a big sacrifice on in terms of me is my obsession with books :o . As to financials, we spend what we earn sadly, whenever we have spare cash it needs to go on something, yet when we have nothing we get by... so I am not really used to shopping anyway (I buy maybe one pair of jeans, a jumper, a couple of tshirts most years) so I think however old I am I wll be looking longingly at gorgeous outfits!

I hope you don't see this post as me making excuses, it has been a good place for me to rationally think out these things, and as I said, I will be thinking long and hard about some of your questions :)

Thanks again guys,
Gin

[maybe1more]

Hi gin i dont think you are one bit being selfish, especially if your having trouble trying to fall pregnate. You deserve to be be a mother just like everyone else and the money side will sort its self out, i dont work and i have a 22 months old son Connor 14/07/03 but i do get assistance from the goverment and also the goverment is giving a $3000.00 incentive to have children, which is a huge great help. I live in perth so i hope the scheme applys to where you live too, to find out you could call centerlink to find out, also there are heaps of great baby products to buy on e bay which are quite reasonable. I too am trying to fall pregnant, but i never got the goverment scheme when i had Connor but it started june31 2004 so i know it will definatley help me when i FINALLY fall pregnant. Best of luck sweetie and I hope baby dust is coming our way! :D

[BlueGin]

Thanks for your reply Firstbub, it is so lovely to have such friendly and open people to talk to! I used to think there was something bad about taking Government money, but after recieving Youth Allowance (not anymore sadly, about $10 over the cutoff) I have realised that I pay tax like everyone else (when I am working that is :p ) so I now welcome any help. I am pretty sure the baby bonus is Aust. wide, and someone put me onto the family assistance website and it looks pretty promising!
I just love the thought of being able to bring a baby into our live, I don't expect it to be perfect, but I think we are ready emotionally. After nearly 4 years together we have become really good at supportng eachother, and he is learning that money aint everything!!!

I am such a sop!

[Jamily]

Hi Bluegin

I don't think you are being selfish at all wanting to start your family - its a totally natural feeling and I dont think there is ever a right time - I am due on Monday and could defs still do with more money etc! The only thing I will say is that my hubby is one of 4 and his parents struggled throughout his childhood - as a result he only wants one baby for us as he really doesn't want that kind of life for his own kids. Ultimately you need to do what is right for you, but he feels very strongly about this and so I thought it was worth mentioning. Don't get me wrong, he loves his parents and siblings but he had a very tough time going to Uni as they couldn't give him a cent to help out. He has just finished his Masters degree (so proud!) so perhaps his background has given him the drive to do this? Sorry I'm rambling! Good luck with whatever you decide. :)

[Tannie]

Well - it just depends what / how you feel you can manage and live with really! Non one can make such a huge decision for you..........

Like RuthK said - don't underestimate how much time and effort a baby requires - how tired you often feel etc. I too have degree and have studied post-grad & am now a mother - I have deferred my post-grad degree (AGAIN!!) because I just know I couldn't give my baby the time she requires if I was trying to do study now OR vs Versa.

Only you know how much you want to be a mother - but I get a real sense of desperation from your posts & wonder if this is because your medical condition has you very worried or why??? You are still very young - plenty of women have 3-4 kids after 30yrs without difficulty........I'm late 30's and just had my first & am ttc #2 now...........I'm not sure what condition you have - but if it's endometriosis (which is what I have) please get good advice - recent research has shown it really depends where you have it and what type, how much fertility is compromised.....so you might have more time then you think.

Only you and Hb know how you are with money / finances too. It can be very stressful having a child and no money to support......make sure you weigh into your situation the baby getting sick, needing doctors visits or medications perhaps and all these types of "non perfect" senario things. It's not a nice feeling to know your baby needs something and you can't provide it.......I don't like to be negative - but if time and $$ etc are REALLY tight - you have to think if you have other supports (family and friends) who would be able to help out, financially and / or with time.

Just some thoughts to consider..........
T

[BlueGin]

Clairet, a good point your husband makes, as it is tough for some bigger families. I come from a family of 4 too, with a SAHM and a dad in an artistic/freelance field so money sure did go up and down! Generally down though :p Luckily we have the best parents ever, no money to give (on rare occasions they have been able to lend us a bit, but as the yougest I got a job at Maccas to buy the groceries at 15). So I don't worry too much on that score, Dad always said that it builds character to not get new clothes if you didn't work for them (I did NOT agree with that! lol)

Hi Tannie, with medicines and medical treatment, having a health care card is fantastic, and I did a bit of research and found out tat my baby would be covered by this too, it means that medicines (mostly, not always) are not generally over $4. So I guess it would just be extras like possibly palm oil, that Reflux stuff I have heard mentioned here, stuff like that.
I possibly dramatised our situation a little too much :rolleyes: we do have living expenes pretty sorted, and we always seem to have some left over, we just aren't in the homebuying style category. As for time with bub, ideally I would be a SAHM, but that aint happening any time soon (come on the lottery!!!) so I will always have to spend at least 3 days at work in the future, or 2.5 at uni now. At uni I will also have longer holiday periods at home, though there will definitely be times when I have exams and have to spend time studying pretty hard. The medical condition is only PCOS, which many women seem to go fine with, I just seem to have a rather invasive form, where the final popping of the cysts, and the inflamation, is not doing any good to the ovaries and tubes. It is not definitely going to stop future pregnancies, it's just that my odds are going down gradually, and I also have a pretty high risk of miscarriage so it may take a while to actually hold a little bub of my own. My Gyn and one other I saw in Sydney both thought that for the chance of a big family, they would be starting ASAP.

All in all, I am kind of in two minds. I have seen my and my husbands families make great lives with very little money, but I guess for some reason I keep expecting a massive windfall (not likely in reality, no inheritance or family money coming our way!) that will mean I don't need to work in the future. Who knows, maybe I will just wait to see what happens this month, and then if no positive have another think. Though I am pretty sure in my heart that I just want to be a mum, I have wanted it for years, so I guess knowing now who I want the father to be has just made me all the more desperate(and I see what you mean about seeing that in my posts!).

Thanks for the food for thought guys :)

[mumof2girls]

I really don't think you are being selfish. If this is something you decide to do then do it, I grew up in a family of 5 and we never missed out on anything and we made our own fun. You don't need a lot of money to survive and I found that when I was pregnant I would buy stuff (nappies, bibs etc) for my entire pregnancy so I didn't have to buy it all at once, when my children were older I made them vegies etc, I hardly ever bought store bought ones unless we were travelling long distance. Also once your baby is born and if you do have spare money then you can hit all the sales at the end of every season, I did this and saved heaps of money I would buy next years summer clothes at the end of this summer. They are kids and don't care what they wear.

Think it over and decide what is best for you, there are plenty of us out here that don't earn a great wage and we survive. Having chn is obviously important to you so I say go for it & GOOD LUCK with the test :)

[BlueGin]

Thanks Mumof2girls, that sounds like a great idea to buy little things gradually during prenancy. I imagine it would be quite a relief once they are born to know that there are less things to worry about. It would also mean that once you come home you might be able to buy a few luxuries (I think $25 for a haircut makes you feel a million bucks!). We really enjoy market shopping and cooking fresh so I guess that would help too.
If I get a positive this weekend, I am going to try and keep it secret till hubby's birthday on Tuesday, he is almost as impatient as me!

A quick note; hubby has been hearing rumours of a promotion for him to manager! Still not a huge amount, but once you get used to not having money, any change is sooo welcome! :)

[jamb]

I can't make comment on the study side of things other than a bub takes up ALL my time and life revolves around him (wouldn't change it for the world tho!!!) My hubby and I were both in well paying, secure, good prospect type jobs but wanted a baby real bad, so we did it!

Hubby quit his job and we had a sea change as we knew we couldn't afford life in Sydney. Hubby now works on a commission basis and we havent had any commission YET :( . My maternity pay has just run out and I am on leave without pay as of next week (an option my employer gives for a max of two years). So financially we are about to hit the tough times.

Now we are looking at casual jobs or jobs anywhere- we are considering a move to the snow for ski season. I am a true believer of you can make a go of it if its what you really want. I love being a mother and think it is the greatest thing i have done- now we will look for alternative ways so I can be with him at home for a little longer.

I WAS a lover of fine things and labels- that has had to change and amazingly I am okay with it, my bubs smile beats a pair of Billabong jeans anyday. Follow your heart, stock up early, it really helped us!!!

[mumof2girls]

A baby saving tip I thought I would share with you, my friend has a 2 year old who is a fussy eater and also a new bub who has had to go on formula due to problems. She found having 1 on formula and 1 on karicare very expensive so when we went to the baby show she stocked up on 14 cans of each and they were less than $9 each where at the chemist/shop they were priced at $14 or over, so she saved a heap this way. Something worth considering! :cool:

[BlueGin]

Hey mummajack,
I hope that you are able to sort out a way to stay home with little one for a bit longer, I figure you probably will, as you and your husband are obviously very commited to your family. I agree with the jeans too, you only miss silly things like that for a little while. I used to have all the new clothes in the world before we moved in together, but with bills and all I suddenly couldn't afford to splurge very often at all...know what though? Neither of us cared! We had both found out that all that stuff sure is fun, but nothing compared to the fun of being "team destitute" (joke, we do ok, but it sure does feel like that sometimes when you are out with single friends doesn't it?)
Hi mumof2girls, that sounds like a fantastic idea :D and the other benefit would be getting to go to expos! lol, any excuse would do for me, but saving money? Noone can argue with that! I also remember someone on here mentioning maternity modelling at the expos, because apparently you end up keeping some great maternity outfits from it, and that would mean getting all the great new lines, with the fun of showing off your tummy, and it's all free! free! free!
I sometimes laugh at how fun being canny can actually be, you sure get inventive!
When mum and dad started out she bought a bolt of hessian and used it for curtains and couch covers (hand dyed). WHen hubby and I started out I couldn't quite face hessian, but we had curtains made of pudding cloth!
I think we should start a "babies on a shoe-string" thread mumof2girls! We sure would get some nifty ideas together, and some laughs!

[BlueGin]

Hi all, I tested this afternoon, and a big fat negative :(
Oh well, not the end of the world (though it sure can feel that way sometimes can't it?)
No sign of period yet, I wonder when it will show itself again?

[mumof2girls]

Sorry to hear about the negative result but no period is a good sign (I'm sure)!
I too think we should start a "babies on a shoe string" thread, it would be good to see what everyone comes up with :)

I think everyone who has ever had the latest and greatest misses it but never for long, I'm the youngest of 5 and although we never had a lot of money we never missed out either (back in those days anyway :D ) but all I can remember is a happy childhood and although we are on a budget our girls don't miss out on much but they appreciate everything they get.

I think a lot of children are overly spoilt with materialistic things and it is expected now when I was growing up christmas was family time and the presents were a bonus now it seems to be who has the latest & greatest I think that's why there is so much debt out there! (my opinion only)

Anyway got right off the subject so if you want to talk email me at
kaytaylor@aapt.net.au

[H&B'sMum]

Hi Gin,
Sorry about the BFN, but no period yet so that might be a good sign. Could have been too early to test.
I can give my experiences of having a baby and studying at the same time. I feel pregnant half way through my first year. I was also working full time and doing uni through correspondance, so all my uni work I do in my own time at my own pace, but still have to get assignments in on time.
I am now back working part time (3 days a week) and have 1 assignment and 1 prac left (I'm studying Teaching/Early Childhood) and then I'm finished. It was hard in the beginning and in 1st sem last year I was talking to my lecturers almost every week as I had an assig due the week before Harry was due. They were fanastic and allowed me to submit an assign that wasn't my best but they took my situation into account and marked it on it's merits (did really well too). When Harry came home I would do assigns when he slept and thank goodness he was a great sleeper. But you do need to be prepared not to have a good sleeper. I also had to force myself to spend a couple of hours studying instead of lounging in front of the TV or sleeping. The other thing that gets me through is the support of my DH. He often asks me what uni I have to do and if he takes Harry out to the park or shopping for a few hours will I get it done. So off they go and have daddy/Harry time and I usually get a lot done in that time.
My time managment skills have improved out of sight and it's just a matter of getting the study done when I have time to get it done. I NEVER do studying when Harry is awake as I want to spend time with him.
It is hard working, studying and having Harry but I'm like you and I know that all the hard work I am putting in now will benefit my family in the future with a better earning job.
We also struggle with money and had the same worried questions you did when we were TTC. But we found by putting a little money away each week even if it was $20 while we were trying and had the money it made it easier. We have alway found money for clothes, nappies and other things Harry needs. We are happy to receive hand me downs and Ebay has been my saving haven. If this is something you really want to do then go for it. You will always manage to make it work for your family and it sounds like you and DH already have many things sorted out.
You can PM me if you want to talk to me more about studying/ttc/having baby at home.
Good luck.

Sorry for the long essay!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[BlueGin]

mumof2girls, I nodded a lot during your post :p . Thanks for the support with my negative test, it is definitely fun not having a period (though kind of weird, don't know what I'll think when/if it turns up again soon!
My family is also really big on Christmas being more about family time than presents. We limit to $20 for immediate family, and something small and thoughtfull for the extended family and visitors (3 of us 4 kids have married people from overseas, my husbands family are in Sydney, but one SIL has all family in Mauritius and the other SIL has all in Scotland, so our Christmas table now needs to have a door placed on top to fit them all when they visit!). I find it the best time of the year, and we don't have that horrible stress of having to use credit cards to the max to get by. It also helps that my dads favourite gift is either a bag of nuts or some stationary ( :confused: )
So let's get this thread going! What topic do you think it should be under? (I will drop you a line when hubby brings my laptop home from work (grrr he took it when I was still waking up!)

Harry'smum, as you can see, essays (that I don't get marked for...) are a big thing with me :D Thankyou to you as well for your support with the test results, I woke up feeling disapointed, then my chest area started aching...this body of mine is wacko!!! I too am studying teaching (BEd), I am halfway through 2nd year. I am really keen to hear from you on all topics in this area (I am currently an experiences sponge) so I will definitely pm you for advice, so thanks for the offer!

[Rell]

Hi BlueGin sorry to here about the negative, try not to worry the result will be positive before you know it. I too think a "babies on a shoe string "would make an excelent thread. We try to save money on food by buying no name products and have found a butcher which sells meat very cheap. I also use very little pre packaged food or sauces, making these yourself I find saves money. A freind ( who is always crying poor) just spent $160 on sheets and a quilt for her unborn babies cot, she already had ones she used for baby no 1 but said she wanted everything to match. Is it just me or does anyone else think this a little excessive.
Sorry to get way of the track, Good luck BlueGin and have fun trying. :)

[BlueGin]

Ta Rell,
and I have to agree with you about your friend (as she cries poor) it does seem a bit whacko... in saying that, I have never had the experience and don't know how whacko I will go in preparing for a bub! :D
Yeah, a bummer about the negative, but I aint done yet! And with no period and these odd body changes I still think I am in there with a shot, maybe I should test first thing in the morning? The pack (First Response) says any time of day is fine, but I usually seem to test mid-late afternoon, do you think this could be affecting the results? Anyhoo I guess if I am preg and all is healthy then the numbers will start shooting up and it wont matter if I test at midnight!
I'm with you on the home made bases and sauces, once you are practiced it actually doesn't take long at all anyway. I always have a jumbo bottle of soy sauce, oyster sauce, a bag of onions and garlic, and lots of tinned cheap tomatoes. I find that this is pretty much all you need to make most meal bases and it sure works out cheap. A good butcher is a real blessing too, we don't have one around here so we go to the Queen Victoria Market, or an asian market, and save heaps. Doing this I found we could eat well on $50 a week, not sure how that compares with you guys, but mum was darn proud of me! :p

[mumof2girls]

Hi Rell, I do agree with you that it is excessive especially since she already has the stuff to use from her first baby, I can understand why they are "poor". I'm all for having your children's rooms look nice but there are cheaper ways to do it!

Hi BlueGin so still no period, my fingers are crossed for youXXXXXXX (and my toes) :D
I think we should start the thread from pregnancy and work our way through each stage of the child's life, what do you think?

Also (way off the subject) at christmas as we also have a large number of people who come together for x-mas so on christmas day we put all our names in a hat (adults & kids) and pull out a name and then we have all year to buy for that person and then just for our own kids and you have sales all year so you can get some good bargains. My kids are older now and my oldest likes to sew so they pretty much save up and make stuff for whoever and it is nice stuff like cushion covers etc. This year my oldest has her brother & wife (he's a lot older, long story) and they had a baby on new years day so she is making a scrap book of their daughters first year, which they can hand down to their daughter in the future.

Anyway had better give your eyes a rest and get on with packing as we have just sold our house and have to move in 3 weeks and we haven't found a house yet :eek:

[BlueGin]

mumof2girls, thanks for cramping up your fingers and toes for me! ;)
I tried that idea for Christmas last year, but my brother's girlfriend (you will hear me whinge about her every so often, she is really opinionated and fitness freak and annoying and insensitive...etc etc etc. hehe) said that was too "stingy" and that we could do it for her but she would be buying everyone gifts! :eek: Way to ruin to fun of it hey? As if it would work if some people didn't cooperate?
Anyhow, enough about her, I think that starting with pregnancy would be great. And in there we could also include just day to day stuff (eg. recipes and home decorating/gardening) on a budget, what do you say?
Sensitive chest today, do you think it could be because I keep poking it to check? ;)
Good luck packing!

[mumof2girls]

I guess one way to get around your brother's girlfriend is to ask everyone why they are there and see what everyone thinks, some may like the idea as christmas is an expensive time of year & some may not like to buy for all. We also decide where x-mas is going to be held as we try to go to someone else's house each year and who is to bring what (food & drink wise) it works out really cheap for most people.

I think that would be a great idea just everyday hints & tips that we could all share. I can't believe how much I have packed today but have only 1 box left so have to find some more tomorrow. I can't believe we are moving out of our house in the next 3 weeks, we have lived in this house for nearly 10 years! We put it on the market and it sold in a week :eek: we couldn't believe it and then they gave us 3 weeks to move :eek: so will be a busy couple of weeks so if you don't hear from me during the day I will get on here at night when all is quiet :D

I hope you are pregnant, there is nothing like it!
I only have 2 children as my doctor said no more. With my first I had chronic morning sickness from week 6 till the day they were born 24/7 (I weighed 6 stones when I was 7 months pregnant) then after 14 hours & 5 mins out came my darling daughter along with a 3rd degree tear ( also during the pregnancy I kept going into prem labour). I wasn't suppose to have the last one and I didn't listen and died on the table and my hubby was punching me in the chest to get me breathing again, my pregnancy was worse than the first and the delivery wasn't much better but it was all worth it as I have 2 very beautiful darling girls who were near to perfect babies (yes I'm not joking).

Well hubby has just finished cooking the dinner so had better go, best of luck :)

Kay

[BlueGin]

Hey, I might try that this Christmas (as I know a lot of the family will be pretty hard up). Your poor husband with the second delivery! :eek: I mean, it's bad enough for you, but he must have felt like running out for an emergency vasectomy after seeing that!

[mumof2girls]

No need for an emergency vasectomy as I made sure he had one while I was pregnant!! It didn't bother him at all as he said he had enough kids and he wasn't risking losing me if we had anymore and raising them by himself :) Can understand that, after my daughter was 2 1/2 I had my tubes tied just to make doubley sure! I must admit pregnancy/childbirth & me just don't seem to mix at all. But we were blessed with 2 darling girls so what more can we ask for :)