i can't stop crying

[Two To Be Three]

what have i done

im now a single mum and i really don't know what to do,,

graham has left me and bub and he told me it is over

i don't know how im going to get on,, i haven't eatin in two days and i really can't be bothered

:crying::crying::crying::crying:


WHAT DO I DO

[jaq]

Oh, sweetie.

First, go and eat something. You need to look after yourself and your little girl, and you need some energy to do that!

No need to stop crying yet. Let it all out - the tears will dry up when they need to.

Keep your little girl close. Regardless of what happens with your former partner, you have created a wonderful little life together - take comfort in that.

I'll leave the practical advice to all the wonderful single mums who have navigated this jungle by themselves ... all I can do is give you lots of these :hugs::hugs::hugs:

[84zsazsa]

what have i done

im now a single mum and i really don't know what to do,,

graham has left me and bub and he told me it is over

i don't know how im going to get on,, i haven't eatin in two days and i really can't be bothered


WHAT DO I DO


:hugs::hugs: Hi Chic,

I havent crossed paths with you before but wanted to pop in and say chin up. No amount of words i can alone say is gona make all this better but i can tell you that you will be okay and a strong person for this. We are all here to support you and the single mummies on here are a fantastic bunch of ladies. Keep up your food and sleep to a good standard and chin up for your little girl. I didnt have kids but was terribly hurt when my Ex walked out. Its a shock and such a blow to your self esteem but dont waste your tears on a MAN, just use them to work through the hurt.

Some more of these :hugs::hugs: and take care,

Danni

[cocobambino]

Oh sweetie Im so sorry:hugs:
Is there any chance of a reconciliation>
I know how your feeling I was seperated from DH for 4 months last year and I felt the exact same and lost so much wait and I was always miserable my kids sufferd for this and looking back I wish I had of held my head high and coped for their sake.

If you need to chat please feel free to PM me it does get better believe me by the 2nd month it was bearable so hold tight you will be ok:hugs:

[Jakois]

:hugs::hugs:. Its an awful thing to go through. No amount of advice will take the initial pain away, but take it from someone who has been there, it will get better. Just take it day by day.

[sockstealingpoltergeist]

I'm sorry that this happened to you. What a callous thing to say- "get over it". You are sure to have been way to good for man like that anyhow. And believe me when I say in a few months time you will probably say THANK GOD he left me now I can start living the life I deserve.
Have you been in contact with centrelink??? Make sure you get everything you are entitled to. Good luck.

[Roopee]

Oh, Im so sorry.
I dont have any advice- just lots of :hugs:

[patsmum]

so sorry to hear, i have no idea what you are going through the only thing i can say is look at all the single mums on here that have made lives for them selves and their children, it is possible. stay strong.

[bell n d]

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

You need to remember you have to be strong for your child!
And as bad as it is now remember it has to get better!

[SorenLorensen]

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

[miakat]

Oh honey - big hugs for you. :hugs::hugs::hugs:

I don't know what to say but please try and eat something, I know it must be hard but your little bub needs you to look after yourself.

:hugs:

[alphafemale2901]

Hey hun, I want to send you a stack of :hugs:

I'm not a single mum now but I was for 10 years and I promise you, you can do it. After you dust yourself off from the shock of your relationship being over, you will bounce back stronger than ever, because us mums are resilient.

You really need to try and eat something soon and keep your spirits up for your little girl, as best you can. I'm not saying all this won't be a massive challenge but I'm am absolutely positive that you can do this.

If you have a good friend or relative close-by (someone who won't judge you or give you a bunch of directives on how to 'fix' your life) you should go have a good cry on their shoulder. If you don't then keep reaching out for hugs and compassion here at BH.

Take it easy on yourself and remember to be kind to yourself. Also remember that your little girl - the most important person in your world needs you right now, so don't give up on yourself.

Take care. :hugs:

[OneBabyBoy]

Don't try and look too far into the future.

Just take this one day at a time at the moment. Or even one hour at a time when things are really bad.

Set yourself small goals like: I will have a shower today, I will eat today etc.

Please PM me if you need to talk to someone who's been through something similar.

I'll be thinking of you :hugs::hugs::hugs:

[Sazeby]

:hugs: Aww hun, it will only get better from now on.

[*munchkin*]

Lots of these for you :hugs::hugs:

As the others have said, you need to take care of yourself, because you have a little person who needs you. Try to eat something - you are important!

It might seem like the darkest tunnel you've ever been in, but you can do this...one step at a time. For now, just focus wholly and solely on yourself and your little girl. Feed yourself, and her, and get through each day however you can.

The tunnel will get lighter, and soon you'll find that you CAN do this, and that you are really proud of yourself for doing it on your own.

Lot's of us here on BH have been through something similar (my partner left when DD was 3 mths old), and we are proof that you CAN do this, and you WILL do it.

Stay strong :hugs:

[Two To Be Three]

i just wish it would get beta now

i went to the doc this arvo she has now put me on anti-depressents for everything

all i have done is cried and cried

i wish he would just come back

[alphafemale2901]

More :hugs: for you sweetie.

I know you're probably feeling the most alone you've ever felt, but I think if that is the way your man is going to behave, leaving you and your little girl, then you may just be better of in the long run without him.

[sarbear31]

I am so sorry! Wish I could say something to make you feel better. I have been there too and the pain will go away I promise.
I am so pleased you went to the doctor that was a really brave thing to do. You just have to remember you have a beautiful baby girl who loves you and needs you to be strong. Remember we are always here to talk.
:hugs::hugs::hugs::hugs:

[PinkBinkie]

I hope you start feeling better soon, looking at your beautiful little girl will help you through. Good on you for seeing your doctor. :hugs: for you.

[RmumR]

Oh hun i really feel for you as i was where you are now just a few months ago. I can still very clearly remember the feeling of emptiness and despair at what to do and i didn't want to eat for a few days either, but do try to make yourself just for your bubba's sake you don't need to enjoy the food just have it so you can keep going for your little one.

I know its hard but just take it an hour at a time and as long as you meet your and your bubba's basic needs nothing else matters right now, all the rest can wait until you are ready and strong enough to deal with it.

PM me if you want to talk, i know its really hard but sometimes it does help just to get it out.

[Lace83]

I feel really sad for you! :hugs:

My DP and I fight a bit and i have been on so many ups and downs and i get angry and stressed...
Im glad he hasnt left me yet!!!

Its so hard the stress a baby puts on your relationship... you never know he may come back to you two...but for now you haveto be strong! For you and your little girl.

I hope you will start to feel better soon. Make sure you get out of the house, go for walks, to the shops, see family and friends.... dont isolate yourself, it'll only make things worse!

[GoneBatty]

MASSIVE :hugs: to u sweety!!

Dont really have the best advice but even tho its hard u really need to eat something even if its only little.

Just take care of urself and ur beautiful baby girl and vent away to us as much as u need!

I know i suck at advice but i wanted u to know im thinking of u and am sorry ur having to go thru this:hugs:

[Mischief]

Honey Im so sorry to hear things are going so poorly for your right now. I really hope that you and G work things out, just keep your chin up, you never know what the future holds.

As for what you do right now.... You take care of yourself and Catlin, you are the two most important people right now. :hugs:

[2sweetgirls]

:hugs:Big hugs.

I am so sorry you have to go through this.

I have no advice other than you just hang in there, and remember Caitlyn needs her mumma. Have you got family or friends around?

I am so sorry:hugs::hugs::hugs:

[proudmama]

:hugs::hugs::hugs::kiss::kiss::kiss:

i can not imagine what you are going through - we could all go through the common cliches (your better off, blah blah blah) but they won;t stop you feeling what your feeling. i really hope things start looking brighter for you soon and in the mean time just focus on you and that beautiful girl of yours. if you have family or friends around go and spend a few days with them and mourn the loss so you can move on, refocus and deal with the situation. i really wish i could help more

[miloand4]

I felt like crying for you when I read this as have been in a similar situation. I take strength from my beautifull children. I really believe focusing on the good things in your life is very important. Every time you think of the bad things in your situation try to think of something good in your life even if it is something small eg: your babies smile sunny days a deep bath find little things to do for yourself sending you big hugs

[Hokey Pokey]

:( Have you a supportive family/friends?

[preciousbabyboy]

Hi B :hugs: Look after yourself. PM me if you wanna chat. :hugs:

[YMo7]

what have i done

im now a single mum and i really don't know what to do,,

graham has left me and bub and he told me it is over

i don't know how im going to get on,, i haven't eatin in two days and i really can't be bothered

:crying::crying::crying::crying:


WHAT DO I DO


i know its hard, coz i been there too, but,

you go to the mirror and stare at yourself and tell yourself out loud: 'i CAN do this. i am a good person. my child needs me. NOone else is worth my tears and i CAN cope. i am a good mum and i am going to get on with my life for the sake of ME and for the sake of my child.'

:hugs:

it might sound dumb but it helped me... it does get easier... :)

[Inforapenny]

:hugs::hugs::hugs:
I know that right now your world feels like it is falling down around you, I've been there.
Take it one step at a time, one thing at a time - just keep at it.
It does get better (I am much happier now - even though I didn't want the marraige to end).
Reach out to your friends, family, bh - ask for help when you need it, be kind to yourself.
PM if you need/want to talk/vent/cry...

[3Divas&me]

Oh Catlinsmumma thats awful!:hugs:

Had wondered where you had got to. You need to take care of yourself and little Catlin.

It is going to be difficult on your own so make sure you lean on others for help and support when you need it and definately get to Centrelink and sort out some income to takecare of yourself.:hugs:

[poppet]

Oh hun :hugs: to you, so sorry you are going through this hard time, please, please, please eat something remember Catlin needs a healthy mumma, you are a wonderful strong woman and you can get through this, remember we are all here for you anytime you need to vent, scream, cry

[Emi]

big hugs sweetie!!!

hope you figure something out soon!!!

[Moorish]

Hey hun, how are you feeling today?
I hope you're taking care of yourself.
We're all here if you need to talk about things, otherwise just know that we're all thinking of you and hope you and G can sort throug some things soon. I hope you're doing ok. Lots of :hugs: for both you and Catlin.

[Two To Be Three]

well he came around last night and i tried to talk to him but all he would do was text on his phone

but he has made it final that there is no chance of getting back together with me at all

reality has finally hit that he wont be coming home to us at all

he said he will taking Catlin when he wants and that he wanted to come and get her Saturday night and i piped up and said no cause it will be to cold to take her and that he can come and get her Sunday for the day and that i want her back Sunday night and that she stays in his care and no one else's

but i still feel i can't do it and that i wont be able to do it,,

im so scared at night time to be in the house alone and no one will come stay with me,, so im usually up stairs by 7 or 7.30 at night cause i just don't like being alone


well thanks for listening everyone
talk to you all soon

[Hokey Pokey]

He can't just grab and take her when it pleases him. I'd contact legal aid and get some proper help :yes:

[jdsmummy]

So sorry to hear that :hugs: :hugs:I know it must be very hard but you will get through it. :hugs:

[toni796]

I know how hard it is to have a realationship end. You are greiving and it will take you time to get your head around it and move on. Try and think positively and put you and your daughter first. Get out and do things to keep your mind off things. Try and meet up with some other mums in your area or from on BH. And don't forget to talk about what is on your mind that is the most important thing to do. Do not let it all bottle up inside as this can be the worst thing to do.

Big hugs to you and I hope you are feeling better about some things soon.

[RmumR]

Oh hun hugs for you. You are in my thoughts. You can and will get through this for Caitlin's sake and you will make a success of the situation no matter how bad it seems right now.

As for your X (not sure what you want to call him) you should probably agree on some ground rules for him visiting or having access to Caitlin as him just saying he'll come and take her when he wants is not reasonable and nor is it in Caitlin's best interests to have her routine disturbed whenever her dad feels he wants to.
You have quite a few options available to you to for this, i would suggest calling legalaid just so you know what you can do and how to do it etc.

Also if you haven't already get onto centrelink and let them know of your circumstances so you can make sure your needs can be looked after. I know you probs don't feel like doing any of this stuff but you should get the ball rollling as it will help you in the long run if you sort legal and centrelink etc out as soon as you can.

Shame you can't get anyone to stay with you, have you asked all your family and close friends?

And you can do this hun you might think you can't now but you can and you will, you have to be strong for Caitlin right now.

[Two To Be Three]

i just found out tonight that im not going crazy thinking he was cheating on me

i found out that he has been seeing a chick mind you who is almost 15 years older than him for a while now and when he went away they were there together and he swore that nothing was happin

that bas#*rd lied to me :crying:

i knew he was up to something but i let it go cause he told me nothing was happening


god dam i am so freaking dumb and stupid

:crying::crying::crying:

[pooks]

:hugs: your not dumb or stupid!! all you did was put trust in what he was telling you, he is the dumb stupid one who ruined it all!! and dont you worry he'll get his karma!
dont ever doubt yourself!! you can and will be able to do this on your own, it may take a little time but you will see how strong you can be!
its ok to cry-- and when ur ready you will wipe away those tears and get started on the new chapter in your life.
please dont ever feel dumb or stupid again :hugs: :hugs:

[Two To Be Three]

but the thing is i feel like i could have done something b4 but i let the feelings for him stand in the way knowing he was seeing someone else

what did i eva do to deserve this,, sometimes i wish i never met him (then i wouldn't have my beautiful baby girl)


god damm i hate him:hair:

[RmumR]

Hun you did nothing to make this happen, you didn't deserve this and neither does Caitlin. It really sux but a lot of the time bad stuff happens to good people and thats whats happened here.
I have been down the exact same trail as you in March this year so know how you are feeling esp when you find out he has been cheating on you. Stupid Stupid guy, bet he didn't even spare a thought for how this would effect you and his daughter i know my X didn't either only thought of himself.

You deserve better than this and you will get it, it may not be tomorrow or in any certain time frame but you will. Things will get much better, you'll see. Right now they are crappy and everything sux but it will get better. Some people say just take it a day at a time but how about taking it an hour at a time....meet your needs and Caitlin's needs and thats all that matters.

I'm thinking of you and sending you lots and lots of hugs.

[Hokey Pokey]

but the thing is i feel like i could have done something b4 but i let the feelings for him stand in the way knowing he was seeing someone else

what did i eva do to deserve this,, sometimes i wish i never met him (then i wouldn't have my beautiful baby girl)


god damm i hate him:hair:

YOU didn't do anything hun, and if you had of done anything differently chances are he still would have done what HE DID!:hugs:

[Two To Be Three]

yer i know but i hope he comes crawling back when he relieses what he is missing out on with Catlin in everyday life

he has really upset me to this point and im starting to get on without him

if he did come back i would be very surprised at this point,, i recon he would try and blame it all on himself for me to take him back

i tell ya i think will be quite fine without him around

[RmumR]

Now you are getting the hang of it! You and Caitlin will be just fine without him, perfectly fine.

[Two To Be Three]

that a$$h*le has went around and spreaded that i cheated on him when he was away and now no one is talking to me cause of it

and none of it is true,, i never done anything of the sort cause for one i wouldn't have the time and for two i loved him to much to do anything wrong by him

im such a freaking fool to eva had gotten with him

:hair::crying::crying::crying:

[RmumR]

oh hun hugs for you. what a b@stard but don't you worry about him or what he says, people will soon realise he is lying and then the truth will come out. Hold your head high cause you know you did nothing wrong.