When they want Daddy!

[fiveofus]

Hi,

Being new to this I was just wondering how you respond when your little ones just want Daddy!!! My 3 1/2 year old really seemed to be missing his Dad today. It was a raining and miserable old day - the kind of day he would have loved to sit and do leggo and then do rough and tumble play with dad. Several times he was in tears because Daddy wasn't here and asked why daddy has to go away. I tried explaining about Daddy earning money for us and that Daddy really loves him etc etc etc. Other than that I just tried to keep him as busy as possible. We can't ring DH until after 6pm.
How do others cope with this?

Thanks,
Bec

[Sheer Bliss]

:hugs: DD (also 3) gets a bit like this when DH is on afternoon shift, so only 3 nights away which isn't that long at all! I show her pics of DH, something that my sis did with her DS when she separated from her husband. My nephew used to take a photo of his dad with him to daycare etc.

I have a little 'brag book' photo album with about 12 photo slots in it, and there are pics of her & her daddy in it, and she LOVES it. She also asks to look at the movies of daddy (on the computer) but is now more obsessed with the baby stuff of her now she realises its there. Good luck!

[mum1986]

we had a fun daddy and ds day for the 2 boys here, they got lots of photos of daddy and him having fun and ds can look at them whenever he wants daddy. i think it's easier here though because daddy has worked away since before he was born. good luck though.

[Kazamataz]

Its funny since Asher was born it wasn't until 5 that he would start getting grizzly and these days calling for daddy.

When Jesse is away around 5:30 Asher starts looking for my phone and then he keeps handing it to me saying "dad dad?"

We talk to Jesse at 6 so he usually doesn't have to wait that long.

However if he's having a particularly bad day where he misses his daddy.

I call Jesse's mob (knowing that he won't answer) and Asher listens to the voice mail message.

He loves it!

You can also get talking photo frames where you can record a message.
Asher loves looking at a photo of him and daddy and listening to the recording he just pushes the button over and over and over again :laughing:

Asher is bit younger than your little one tho

[Mamalicious]

:(:hugs: It's awful isn't it.

Ever since DH left Ali is so clingy, he wont let me go anywhere by myself, if I try to go from the lounge to the kitchen (3 steps, open plan) he gets up and chases after me crying. :(

:hugs:

[TeamAwesome]

Aww :hugs: I understand. My DS misses his daddy like crazy some days so we've started to plan what is going to be a special daddy and DS day for when Dh comes home. it'll also be Ds birthday so DH gets to come help us go buy all the decorations etc that we've already seen in the shops.

We also made up a calendar for when we are going to be picking up DH (and when we will be dropping him off again so that DS can see how long DH will be home) every morning we cross off another day and we count how many sleeps (well I do as it's too many for DS right now at 22 sleeps) I also find that sometimes a bit of a play time with an uncle or granddad can help too.

Dh brings home special things at the end of each trip sometimes it's little like a plane or something like that other times it's something I've bought for them which is a quilt cover each which is stashed in the boot, lol.

They talk to DH most nights on the phone also love looking at pics of DH especially ones with them in it.

When DS tells me he's missing daddy I tell him Mummy misses daddy too, daddy misses and loves us all but he has to go away for work.

[berniebabe]

We are lucky DD gets to chat to daddy atleast 3 times a day - he is a chef so he is pretty flexable and the is a phone close by. It is usually about 3 days in DF's roster she starts calling for him. Then she say's "Daddy it working at the airplane" So cute they way she say's it.

[sam's mum]

we had video footage of ex DH reading books and I could play that if DD1 was missing him.

she also had a photo next to her bed.

[fiveofus]

Thanks everyone - will definitely do the photo thing!!!

[fiveofus]

Well - I gave him one of his favourite photos of him and his dad and he asked why it wasn't real and said he didn't want a pretend daddy he wanted the person daddy!

It's a bit scary when they just keep outwitting you at 3 1/2!!!! What's he going to be like as a teenager???? :devil:

Will have to try the video next time dad is home!
It's also just comforting to know - like always - that you aren't alone answering these heartbreaking questions!

Thanks,
Bec