View Full Version : Breast Rejection?
Has anyone else had the problem where all of a sudden their bub decides that instead of feeding properly, they will pull them selves off every second and look around everywhere and not feed properly and yet with a bottle, there is a continuous suction and no pulling off? My 4 month old has really started doing this this week and it is so frustrating for me trying to breast feed her and she has started waking up an extra feed during the night as well as I think that because she keeps pulling herself off so much she isn't getting enough during the day. I have started to give her expressed breast milk in a bottle to make sure she gets enough and I am also giving her a bottle of formula per day now to start to wean her. I wanted to wait until she was at least 6 months to do this but she has been so unsettled with the breast this week I felt like I had no choice. I am also under extreme stress and I think she has picked up on this.
Has anyone else experienced this? I feel like a failure for having to put her on bottles and formula earlier than I wanted to. Also, I am not sure if this is related but she has been farting like you wouldnt believe and the smell is enough to kill anything in a 1km radius!!! :)
First off, please don't ever feel like a failure for what your bub decides she wants! Feeding from a bottle is different than from the breast and your daughter may have just decided that it's easier and that's what she wants.
It's very common for bubs to prefer either breast or bottle and be insistent on their preference. I know a mum with twins who initially had to express and bottle feed as bubs were too small to nurse. One happily switched to breast after a few months, the other would have nothing to do with breast and stuck with the bottle. I had intended to breastfeed a lot longer than I did but Chloe lost weight (I wasn't eatting well) and once she realised she could get food a lot easier from a bottle (& way more) she rejected the breast.
You might find that she will nurse best at certain times of day, maybe the first morning feed when she's still sleeping and your supply is highest. So if you can keep that feed and go to bottles (expressed or formula) for the rest you might find it less stressful. Although the hassle & time committment of expressing and bottlefeeding is a pain - I did it for a month and hated it, it seemed like I spent the entire day either being milked, feeding or cleaning bottles and equipment.
I think 4 months breastfeeding is great and you should be proud of it, not feel like a failure. Alot of studies show that the period when bubs get the most benefit from breastfeeding is the 2 or 3 weeks after birth, and you've given your daughter a great start over that time.
Thanks Martham for the reassurance and support. It is hard coming to terms with what is going on and I always had it set in my head that swapping her over to bottles would be easy but it isn't. I thought I would only make it to 3 months but I kept extending as I wanted to give her the best start in life and i was bottle fed and I have had stomach problems all my life which they say is supposedly linked but who knows!!! I also think because I haven't been eating properly this week and with the stress I have (my hair is even falling out!) that this has affected my supply and she senses that and the bottle is easier for her and is consistent I guess.
I am lucky that I can get 100ml in 10 minutes from expressing so yes, I will breast feed her when she is more sleepy which will be her 430 am ish feed and the first and last feed at night if i can and top her up with formula the rest of the time.
She is too alert and I think she is also at the age where she wants to look around at everything as she may be missing out on something! I have also heard that they go through a fussy period like this if they are teething?
You are not alone. I just went through EXACTLY the same thing with my bub (3months) just then. It seems he goes through good and bad breastfeeding periods. As soon as I think okay we've got this under way he goes into a bad period and we both get really frustrated- not what I expected from breastfeeding. I was expressing twice a day for my sanity but then I thought things are going well so I'll just breast feed all feeds. Now it looks like I am back at the breast refusal stage so he just got a bottle of formula. I do feel guilty when I think I'll just wean him onto formula so I keep persisting, but some time I think are the tense moments worth it and its not like my boobs can keep up with all the switches in feeding times. I just wish he'd stick with the good feeds, so much less cleaning for me.
And I totally agree, formula stinks- the vomit, the poo and the baby all reak of the formula!!! :)
whoever would have thought that formula would produce such foul outputs for such a tiny creature!!!
i guess it's payback for all those times I eat 'windy foods' hehe :D
Lol, Taylasmum. I had to laugh. Your hair will be falling out for a long time to come! Mine just stopped, I think, and bub is 1.5 years now! & if you think breastfeeding an alert 3 month old is frustrating wait till you try getting a toddler to sit still long enough to eat! But I remember being just as frustrated and having many teary days last year.
Swapping completely to bottles is pretty easy actually. Trying to mix bottles and breast like you are is much harder.
The big thing, which I didn't do enough of, is to make sure you take care of yourself. Eat well, drink lots and sleep as much as you can. & try not to get too stressed - once a feed starts going wrong it's easy to get tense which bub will sense and also isn't going to help with your let down and supply. If a feed isn't going well you can always abandon it before you both get worked up and try again later.
There ARE advantages as well as disadvantages to formula feeding, same as for breastfeeding... but I won't get into that discussion here.
yes, this sounds familiar. My four month old is driving me crazy doing the exactly the same thing - pulling off the breast, looking around but crying and wanting to get back on the breast. If I think he's had enough and try to sit him up and burb him, he does the 'banana back' and carries on. I know that part of the problem, particularly at the start of the feed, is his impatience at waiting for the milk supply. But I don't understand why he does it after 5 mins of furious drinking. We've started on solids but I don't think the breastfeeding issue is linked with the solids.
our little treasures
Hi all, I had dd doing the same when she was that age I think you might find that your bubby just wants to look at their surroundings and with a bottle its easy to do that. With the hair falling out my sis in law got a beauty book for her 14th and I was reading the pregnancy bit and was amazed to learn that while your preggars the hair stops shedding due to the change in hormones. once the hormones return your hair then sheds all the hair ir would have you weren't preggars. My long strands of hair was everywhere once dd was born, hubby and I would often finds strands in her nappies as she had eaten it somehow.
As for the b/f go to a darkened quite room and see if there is any change!!
Yep it is the same in a quiet darkened room so I have given up and expressing up to 4 times a day with half her feeds being formula and half being EBL and when she wakes up in the middle of the night she gets the boob as she is too tired to look around.
This is working out well for both of us and I know she is getting enough milk now so this is the way it will stay!!!! :D
I too am having the same problem with my 4 month old!!
I can relate to your problem Spencersmum,with bub doing the "banana back" and fussing and crying.
My girl will drink for 5 minutes on one side,then wants nothing to do with that side and will cry and arch her neck away from me until I give her the other side.It can get very frustrating,but I will hang in there. :)
Hi Butterfly, you should definitely hang in there. Spencer is not doing the banana back and fussing as much - it seems to be worse in the evenings.
2 months ago I wrote quite a bit on this subject - I think I called the question 'self weaning?'
my girl is now well and truly back on breastmilk and can't get enough. it is apparently a 4-6 month thing. I think we had the problem for about 6 weeks. Long enough for me to think it was going to be a battle for ever, and then suddenly - OVER.
I found a couple of things worked - totally changing / being flexible with positions (sometimes sitting up a little worked); also with what she could see from where she was feeding - sort of like giving her something to focus on to get started; feeding lying down (no idea why) and also when we were out I used to sing the same tune over and over and she'd focus on the sound of my voice, not the surroundings - mind you I also had to be patient and let her stickybeak.
I found that I had to feed her in the middle of shopping centres, she wouldn't concentrate with babies around in the parent's room.
In the end it was all worth it as she is still getting the just right made-to-order breastmilk and now she's loving it - I don't have to wash bottles and no formula poos!
the chn I saw also said to me that if I was attaching her she was sucking for a couple of sucks and then pulling off - to put her back down to play for 5 mins, and start again - do that for 1/2 hour of time and that would be sufficient milk for a 'feed' - this was a really huge help - gave me an idea of what was ok.
we went for a little while getting what was apparently plenty of milk, but to me seemed to be a significant reduction. However it was pointed out tome that they also get more efficient at sucking around this time, so perhaps manage with less focussed feeds!
i relalise im a few months late but , hey if it helps someone else my son began rejecting the breast when we had a bout of thrush, it hurt his mouth to suck and so he would suck, pull off, fuss etc. another time he rejected it was to do with onions i had eaten lol :D
it must be a 3 to 4 month thing. I am also going through this. But I am going to persavere (spelling?).
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