I can't read it!

[Teley]

Sorry I just had to vent somewhere:hair:...
I have access to loads of books and articles through google scholar through my uni, and so I decided to procrastinate and look up articles and books about teenage parenthood. What I found makes me sick. I read through it, and all it is is negative negative negative negative. It's like I'm a freaking stain on society. These 'intellectuals' have no freaking clue what they're talking about. There was a woman who did a study and all her women ended up having depression problems, they came from the same socio economic, ethnic, and educational attainment background:mad:...how can she come up with a conclusion from using that data?! And with the ethnicity thing, I'm so sick of people raising their eyebrows when I walk down the street and they make one assumption about me, and then I start talking to him in Russian and they turn around and look at me again, it happens 70% of the time I swear. Like to have a baby young you have to be poor, anglo and having dropped out of school. Although there's nothing wrong with that either!
Sorry I'm just feeling really s****y, I never felt like having my son was a problem, I don't even see anything wrong with teenage parenthood, and I know a lot of people will bag me for my opinion but that's my honest opinion! I don't even agree with all those articles about educational achievement, honestly, maybe I'm a minority, but I'm turning 20 and finishing off my degree, being a parent hasn't stopped me! No wonder there are many stereotypes about us, look at all the stuff that's written in academic text books!
Sorry about the rant...I had to get it out somehow. To people who would at least understand what it's like to be stereotyped.

[confusd]

:hugs::hugs::hugs:
people see the young mothers that dont care about their and they expect us all to be like that,
which is a load of **** because some of the young mothers i know are the best mothers ive met

although i heard you talk to him in Russian i probably would turn to look at you. i love the fact that you speak to him in a different language id love to speak something other than english, i know like three french words and im always saying them to her ha:laughing:

[OJandMe]

Ahh.. don't worry about it Kat! :hugs: When I fell pg with the twins no one thought I'd finish uni.

I finished with flying colours, only 6 months out of phase, never even having to defer, just dropped my number of subject the semester the boys were born..

I'm now halfway through my Masters...

So people can go suck on that. ;)

[ChloesMumma]

I agree.
I was studying at tafe when I fell pregnant. I was too scared to tell my lecturer because she was one of those people who would make smart **** comments whenever she saw a pregnant teen or a young mum.
But worse than that I got those looks and comments from people I knew, people I thought were my friends. That hurt more than anything else.:hissy:

Instead of judging parents by their age, people should focus on the way they treat their children...

[Freya]

Yeh, that's just the way it is though.

I got really annoyed the other day because some UK channel was airing a show based on teenmothers and they were talking about how great it is and realistic and then I found out the show is called 'Help! I'm a teen mother' a show which is all about teen mothers who aren't coping getting help. Where is the focus on the ones who are doing a bloody great job?

*Shrug.*

[ChloesMumma]

I saw the previews for that on foxtel...
Instead of everyone focusing on the negatives, they should start and look at the positives. There are bad parents in every age group, ones who beat their kids, neglect them & do it for the money... age has nothing to do with it, you look back in history and girls were expected to have children in their mid teens.... As long as you can support them and give them a safe & healthy upbringing, I say go for it. BE PROUD

[Teley]

I got really annoyed the other day because some UK channel was airing a show based on teenmothers and they were talking about how great it is and realistic and then I found out the show is called 'Help! I'm a teen mother' a show which is all about teen mothers who aren't coping getting help.

:eek:That's ridiculous. That's absolutely stupid.
Although that's basically what's written in those articles, that teen mothers need all this support and stuff. I think, like what? Loving partners and supportive family? Isn't that what every mother would do better off with.


I saw the previews for that on foxtel...
Instead of everyone focusing on the negatives, they should start and look at the positives. There are bad parents in every age group, ones who beat their kids, neglect them & do it for the money... age has nothing to do with it, you look back in history and girls were expected to have children in their mid teens.... As long as you can support them and give them a safe & healthy upbringing, I say go for it. BE PROUD

:iagree: So true!

[chameleon]

I got really annoyed the other day because some UK channel was airing a show based on teenmothers and they were talking about how great it is and realistic and then I found out the show is called 'Help! I'm a teen mother' a show which is all about teen mothers who aren't coping getting help. Where is the focus on the ones who are doing a bloody great job?

*Shrug.*

Oh, just what we need... the media highlighting the negatives of young mothers again.

I saw a bit of Dr. Phil the other day and it was about teenage mothers. He said (aimed at the parents of teenagers) "if your teenager falls pregnant, you know who will be raising the baby? YOU will," or something along those lines. It really annoyed me. I know lots of young mothers who are all raising their babies themselves and doing a wonderful job. What an unfair statement.

[Benji]

I saw "Help I'm a teen mum". I think even the title is judgemental!

I also saw that episode of Dr Phil - I was very disappointed in Dr Phil. Usually I really like him, but I felt as if he bombarded those poor girls. They are already pregnant - why make them feel like they won't be able to do it?

Don't worry too much about those articles and "studies" because they are all based on the teen mothers who aren't coping, not the ones who are doing a bloody fantastic job.

[chameleon]

I also saw that episode of Dr Phil - I was very disappointed in Dr Phil. Usually I really like him, but I felt as if he bombarded those poor girls. They are already pregnant - why make them feel like they won't be able to do it?


Yeah that's what I thought too. All they needed was a bit of support and encouragement. Not all the judgement. And throwing things around like "babies raising babies" isn't helpful at all.

[sandy_1902]

if i saw you talking to your son in Russian i would look but only because i find it so cute.

i was in target the other day and there was a women and her daughter talking French i think.. i was in awe it was so cute,

IMO most educated people cant make a clear statement on young mothers because they DO NOT no what it is like.



I saw a bit of Dr. Phil the other day and it was about teenage mothers. He said (aimed at the parents of teenagers) "if your teenager falls pregnant, you know who will be raising the baby? YOU will," or something along those lines. It really annoyed me. I know lots of young mothers who are all raising their babies themselves and doing a wonderful job. What an unfair statement.

GRR at Dr. Phil.. i still live with my mum and yeah she helps out.. but i no i would be able to cope without her.. we had it set from the get go that it was my baby so i would do most of the work. and that's what happened.. my mum helps because that's just the way she is

[Teley]

He said (aimed at the parents of teenagers) "if your teenager falls pregnant, you know who will be raising the baby? YOU will," or something along those lines.

That does get to me as well. When I tell people I finished school, it's always the assumption of, oh your mum must have helped you out a lot, and I'm just like no, I finished school with my own efforts actually, and no I don't live with them and no they don't pay me any money and actually if you want to know they live overseas. But most of the time people just assume that my mum has DS in her care a lot of the time. And it's not like older mothers don't have their mothers help them out either if they're actually on talking terms unlike me and mine, it's just not seeing as 'oh it's because they're too young and can't cope otherwise'.

I suppose you're right about the Russian bit though lol sandy_1902, I just also think that people don't assume that about young mothers most of the time...but then maybe that's me just thinking too much!:laughing:
It's good to hear from you girls -- makes me know I'm not alone in thinking this is biased and judgemental!:hugs:

[Mum&bubs]

I know what you mean. Last year I was doing an assignment and I got to choose between teenage parenthood or breast vs bottle. I first chose teenage pregnancies because I thought it would be awesome because I know lots about it :laughing: but I felt sick reading the 'studies' about it. There is not one positive thing found in these stupid studies.

Not only do they bag out about how we are all depressed/poor/uneducated they also talk about how it affects our bodies etc. I ended up choosing the breast vs bottle debate.
It's so sad that alot of people do believe young mothers aren't worthy :( I have met so many brillant young mothers who I am in awe of!

No matter what your age, your background etc I think everyone should be treated with the same respect. Young mothers shouldn't be labelled a 'problem' and what not. Were all parents, why can't we just have the same respect as everyone else :( Same with older mothers, I'm pretty sure they cop it as well. It's sad.

[mummynow]

I just have 2 little things to say:

Firstly, I find it really interesting that most people I know around my mums age had their first baby around the age of 17-20 (back in the 1970's) and yet now there is such a stigma about teenage parents. I've never really given it any thought as it has never affected my life or friends directly so this is just an observation.

Secondly, I can't help but look at mums talking to little kids in another language (sorry if this makes you uncomfortable) - simply because I admire it and I am so jealous. I wish I could speak another language and could teach my daughter. I have a friend from Austria and her little boy has been able to speak fluent German and English since he was like 2 or 3 years old. That is such a good asset. Also my mums whole family spoke german at home but English at school/work so they have 2 languages too. I don't think it matters what language it is.... it's just such a good thing :thumbsup: