My Mum won't get out of bed!

[Issey]

Hi,

My mum has been through a lot in the last year and a half, nearly died from oesofegus cancer and a major operation which took one year to recover and then had to have two more operations on her eyes and has lost part sight in one eye. Anyway now she has sunk into depression and is on medication. She lives interstate and when she speaks on the phone she says she is 'terrible' and just lays on the bed all day doing nothing. They just moved out their house and into a rental as they want to sell their house as it has asbestos etc. But when the agent rings saying they have interested people she wont ring them back. I don't think she knows what she wants. My stepdad is also very negative person and depressed and they are feeding off each other.

I feel like I don't want to 'mother' my 'mother' if you know what I mean. I don't know what to say to her apart from get out the house and do something and enjoy your life, you are alive :ecomcity: :ecomcity:

I don't understand why a person who has been positive all their life (despite having a hard life) suddenly goes through this unless it is past ghosts finally catching up.

Should I just keep ringing her as I normally would and trying to make positive conversation or what, I don't know.

[misskittyfantastico]

All I can say, is that depression is an illness - one that I'm struggling with at the moment. It often needs to be treated medically and I think that your mum may need yo have her meds looked at. I can assure you that it has nothing to do with "past ghosts", infact quite often a serious illness can trigger clinical depression.
I don't think you need to mother your mother, I do however think you need to encourage her to seek some more help.:)

[rynosmum]

Depression is such a difficult illness - both for the sufferer and the people close to them. Perhaps her medication needs to be reviewed.

Unfortunately she can't just snap out of it and will probably get more depressed when people think she should.

I'm not sure of the right answer for this. Just wanted to give you :hugs: . I'm sure some of the other ladies will have more real-life information.