confusion!

[mazzania]

hi. me and my dp have been havin probs for a while now basically since i fell preggers with my first bub and just went down hill real fast after having my second. mainly due to me not knowing what it is that i want anymore and being able to be nice to him. everything is just maybe and i dont knows, just utter confusion. he has said that he thinks that i have pnd, never been to a doc to find out but yeh. y is everything so confusing? do i just not luv him anymore or is there something thats making me not be able to speak nicely to him. i have no idea y i cant change the way i treat him or y i do it in the first place. and if i dont know y then how can i change it? its just getting too much and i'm wanting to end it just to makes it easier as he doesnt deserve to be treaded this way. thanx for reading.:hissy:

[Funkychicken]

Please remember that this section is the online expert section and not open to members for posting advice.
Unfortunately we have some sort if glitch that is keeping it an open thread but we will endeavour to fix this shortly. :):)

[drshari]

Dear Mazzania
You are not alone! So many women aren't sure how to respond when asked 'what's wrong' or 'are you okay' etc. One of the best things we can do to help ourselves though is to start talking - so well done for being brave enough to post your prob! Now it's time to start talking to your DP. Start with just a few words at a time, 'I feel **** today', 'I just feel flat' or ' I think I should stay with mum for a few nights to give you a break'. This last one is very important to say out loud as this is the last thing most partners want to hear and it gives them a chance to let you know that they don't want a break, they want to help! Remember, he doesn't deserve to lose his DP and kids either! The second step is to review your expectations of both him and yourself. Most of us have very high expectations of what we should be able to achieve or what our partners should be able to do for us these days. Letting go of these expectations and remembering the great things that we already have in our lives can make a huge difference to our moods!
The thought of leaving your DP is very common among women with PND so I would also suggest talking to a GP, counsellor or community health nurse to get some advice about this. Visit BeyondBlue or BlackDog Institue online to get a better idea if what you are experiencing is similar to PND.
Be nice to yourself!
Shari:hugs: