older mums, where the b...hell are ya!!!

[Jo_Jo]

ok ok i was just looking at calling all SAHM young mums and i did not know if i should post, so i thought ill make my own thread, because i feel young sometimes but then on other days i feel 70, i am only 33 but all the friends i have, do not have any babies and alot of the mums i do meet at playgroup are really young mums and thats great as i was 17 when i had my first child... oh i don,t know just sometimes i feel i don,t know where i belong!!?? does anyone get what im trying to say or am i just:ecomcity:

cheers....jo

[Faithcomesinnumbers]

Hi Jo-Jo,

I will join you. I am 31. My DD is 2.5years old. I find I mingle with a lot of older mums at Faiths daycare. We seem to be the only ones though with one child, except of course for my sister.

[my babyemmy]

hi Jo-Jo, im Lee it seems we may have a lot in common, i was a young mum what feels like a long time ago,it was 17 years ago:laughing: ,now im an older mum and it feels at times im too old to fit in anywhere:D
i would love to chat with you
luv lee

[Jo_Jo]

hi my babyemmy,

yep, thats how i have been feeling i think at bubs shrimp swimming lessons i find it difficult it was wierd because it was going well and they were younger and older mums and then my daughter 15 wanted to come so i said no worries, and ever since she did the lesson with me and ethan the mums have treated me different, i cant explain it, i thought at first it was me but as time has gone on i have really noticed it, i mean i dont get in to full on convo,s with these ladies but im always friendly and try to be a part of the group, but it seems im just outside the circle....maybe im being a ......head what do you think? or have you come across this at all!!!

cheers.....jo:thumbsup:

[my babyemmy]

all that type of **** happens to me all the time, but ive got a really thick skin (now)and i dont let it all show! hey where are you based, might be cool to catch up sometime:)

[O&GMUM]

Hi Guys
Must be the demographics because im 34 and all the mums I meet are around my age. I suppose Sydney people wait longer to have kids. I mean we couldnt have afforded to do it any earlier anyway!

[mum2many]

Hi Jo Jo,

I'm a mum to little Emily Jayde who is now 2 years 10 months, she was born when I was 40. I also have 3 sons aged 19, 17 and 13 and 5 step children aged between 20 and 37. So don't feel alone there are a lot of us out there. I have just started to go to playgroup, dancing classes, toddler birthday parties and the like and find that I'm the oldest mum there but regardless I still have a great time with my beautiful daughter. So don't feel alone and if you ever want to chat :ecomcity: just private message me.

Chryssie

[my babyemmy]

hey why dont we all swap our msn details mine is ozleelee @hotmail.com, i luv bub hub but i find msn easier to chat on.
(hey my Emily is Emily jade too boy what a wonderful name :laughing:)

[Jo_Jo]

hi lee and babyemmy,

I knew i would not be the lone ranger, so it must be a social problem now i know it was not in my mind!!! oh yeh im in vic about 2 hours from melbourne heading towards sydney i will organise a msn my daughter has been harping me about it!!! but private message me too i would enjoy chatting to ya lee. And i agree with the other mummy my sis is in berowra heights in sydney and she is 40 with three kids under 5 and most of the mums in her groups are around her age so maybe being in a rural city is alot different.


talk soon cheers...jo:thumbsup:

[Mariposa]

sometimes i wonder where i fit in! im turning 29 next month and have bubs number 3 on the way My eldest DD will be turning 7 and my youngest DD is 2.5. alot of the mums (specially at school) are either in there early to late 40's or at the other end 18 and so on. mind you i dont have problems with talking to anybody, but just the other day, one of the "older" mums commented on how "young" i was. let me tell you i dont feel very young, at times i feel very old, im a responsible person, very happily married, am working almost full time and we own our own business! it can be very frustrating at times on wondering where you actually "fit in":ecomcity:

[Jo_Jo]

yep, its a funny feeling i know and i have not had it...god since i was a teenager,you know what i mean,or like your starting a new job or something??

cheers jo:thumbsup:

[my babyemmy]

hey Jo Jo have you set up your msn yet!
i cant wait to chat with you.:D

[Jo_Jo]

hi lee and babyemmy,


wooooohooooo yes i have here it is EJsgurl@hotmail.com
can,t wait to chat matey:thumbsup:

talk soon ccheers...jo

[moonblossom]

I fit in nowhere and I like it like that, always been a bit of an individual so never worried what people thought of me, or wherei fit in in the scheme of things. Good job I recon LOL

I'm a lot older than most of you, I was pregnant with my first child at 17 and having my last one, YES LAST ONE LADIES lol, when i turn 43. I have young ones still at primary school and not only am i about the oldest, but I'm also the wierdest LOL. I never get mothers talking to me, but I like it that way.

I've never been one who enjoys mother's gossips about how well their little Jimmy is doing LOL.

Being a young mum was fantastic, and being an older mum is just as good. Take everyday as it comes and be thankful for the little things in your life.

A little bit of wisdom from someone who is learning everyday.

Take care everyone

[jasminesmum]

I too am an older mum. 36 :eek:

My eldest ds has just turned 16. I have a nearly 8yr old ds and a 11mth old dd.

Yes it is hard to know where you fit in. I go to playgroup where all of the mums are younger than me. Sometimes I feel like I should take my walking frame with me. My dd loves playing with the other kids though and they are all really nice ladies.

I have msn too if anyone wants too chat. Usually have to fight my ds to get on though.:rolleyes:

Have a great day everyone.

Michelle

[Mariposa]

id love to chat on msn with anyone whos interested! :thumbsup:
mcbnrobles@hotmail.com yap away:ecomcity:

[CJJHRA]

I'm a 33 year old SAHM eldest being almost 14, and youngest just turned 2 today!

[Jo_Jo]

hi ladies,

I really dont feel its a matter of gossip because i really could not give a stuff about idle gossip probably because i was what the gossipers were talking about, and i normally can ignore this feeling but it feels like the second time around, i am more aware of whats going on around me or maybe i have mellowed, or i have to toughen back up a bit, yep i reckon thats it im not gonna worry!!! if they cant accept me for who i am well they can go and jump!!!!;)

thanks ladies im back!!!:smiliedance: cheers....jo

[IAdoreYou]

:eek: I'm 30 this year !!!

I want another baby before I'm 31 .. so I'm gonna join in here :D

[aardvark]

I'm 40 in a couple of months.

I was one of the youngest mums when DD#1 was in kinder (I was 23 when she was born, all the other mums when she was at kinder were mid-30's), I was one of the "average" mums, DD#2 is now 5, I was 34 when she was born, and now I'm set to be one of the older mums, having a 2 month old DS.

[ButterflyKisses]

well looks like I'm the oldest chook in this hen house girls - I'm 44 & DH is 48. We have a DS who will be 3 in June.

Things in my life didn't pan out the way I had dreamt they would as I wanted to be married and start to have children in my early 20's but none of the 3 long term relationships I was in pre-DH were my soulmates and unfortunately I meet DH when I was 33 (34 a couple of months later). We bought a unit here in Sydney before we married when I was 36 - DH was 40 and this was his 2nd marriage - no children from his first - we paid it off before we had our DS.

So far I haven't had any problems fitting in with mothers at our playgroup. They range in age from 22-47 and are all a really nice bunch. Things may change when my DS goes to pre-school and then school as it won't be such a close knit group of women but I don't care what anyone else thinks as my DH and I love each other and absolutely adore our DS and that's all that matters to me.

we all have various reasons why we are older mums and we shouldn't care what anyone else thinks. Mind you I think I'm the only one on here so far who is old and has an only child - some of you have toddlers but also have teenagers so you would have already established good friendships with other women through your older kids..

[Jo_Jo]

no it dosent work that way! i wish it did, i did have a good friendship with my 15 year olds friend from preps we met then and got really close but she moved away last year to perth so me and my daughter have rally missed them both, i do talk by e-mail so thats good you put the rest as aquaintance,s, but i cant wait to do the fruit shift at kinda again:D i loved doing that with the other two!!!!!

cheers....jo

[mumof03]

I'm almost 32 and I know the feeling of being stared at too. I have 3 children, almost 13, 10, and almost 3. I was only 18 when I had my first, so I got stared at something bad, because I was so young (I only looked about 15), now I get stared at because I am usually out with just my youngest while they other 2 are at school, so they naturally presume he is an only child. I have older ladies come up to chat to my son and they say to me "is he your first" I tell them I have two other kids, one in high school and one in primary school, and their whole attitudes change for the worse.
Most of the people I know either don't have kids, or their kids are all grown up. Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck in the twilight zone.

[Jo_Jo]

so true, and normally you would put up and shut up or just not notice, but hey thats what bub hub is for to get it out even though it might not be a big deal for some when its something you feel it can be hard to shake!!!!

[Mariposa]

yay today i went to the shops as i had a day off work, and i was child free (except the one im carrying) was standing in a checkout, as i just brought a new top as im going to a hens night this sat! :smiliedance: anyhows this lady said to me oh how far along are you? i replied that im 25weeks and she says lovely is it your first? i reply no i have 2 others! she said "well, young ppl these days, having all these kids and going shopping!" pft to her my reply was that im not "that" young! but then she literally went to another checkout i mean cmon is this for real???:mad:

[Jo_Jo]

that sux, the more i hear the more im amazed with some peoples attitudes, and it can leave ya gobsmacked!!! and they rush off before you can think of a good comback!!!! not worth it anyway hey:banghead:

cheers......jo

[ButterflyKisses]

Most of the people I know either don't have kids, or their kids are all grown up. Sometimes I feel like I'm stuck in the twilight zone.My DH & I were in the "twilight zone" for a while too because of our age most of our friends kids were leaving school, getting jobs, having boyfriends/girlfriends, driving cars etc. but once I started going to Playgroup, Storytime at the library, acrobatics & singing/musical instrument classes with my DS I've met a lot of lovely friends that we now hang out at each others homes/shopping/park etc with the kids and these women range in ages from 22-47.

It's sad in a way having a child at my age because alot of the friends we use to hang out with we now only see occasionally because obviously we are at different stages with our children however having said that when we were childless and our friends had children we use to see each other all the time but now we've added our DS to the equation we don't see them as much but we have now made new friends who do have small children so I guess we can't have it both ways and even though it's sad some of our friends seem to have dropped off the planet we wouldn't change having our gorgeous DS for nothing.

[Tam-I-Am]

I feel like I don't fit in anywhere either - I'm 25, my husband is 31, we hang out with people his age, so I FEEL like I'm 30 - so the *young* mums think I'm too old and the *older* mums think I'm too young.

Plus, I'm the only one in my old friendship group who has a baby, and all of my husband's friends have kids that are a fair bit older than Claire Bear. So we've had to go out and find a whole new group of friends (mostly through our mum's group), cause no one wants to hang out with us anymore!!

I love being a mum and wouldn't trade it for anything, but this situation is very frustrating sometimes!

[Jo_Jo]

i hear you tammy!!!! and i guess even when you are a mum, or who ever you are you like to feel accepted, of course none of us would change a thing, hell i would move heaven and earth for my children, but it is still good to belong!!! you know what i mean!!!??? i ran into a young ladie i met through the day stay i went to a couple of months ago, she had a little bub 9weeks and we spoke alot when we were there, but i had to leave early so i got no details off her, but the other day i seen her at coles and she was so happy to see me i was really taken back that she remembered me, i like her heaps and we are going to catch up, she was so excited it made my day!!!!:thumbsup:

i even had all the kids with me when i seen her!!!

cheers....jo

[melbourneprincess]

Mind you I think I'm the only one on here so far who is old and has an only child - some of you have toddlers but also have teenagers so you would have already established good friendships with other women through your older kids..

Hi there ...& no you're not!

I'm an 'oldie' too (40 this year) with an only child - our DD who recently turned 2.

The age thing can be funny - I actually don't look my age, so people mostly assume I am younger, but then when they find out how old I am, it can sometimes freak them out. Why, I'm not sure! We're still human at the ripe old age of 40, lol! :rolleyes:

Anyway, just wanted you to know you are not alone! :)

[Miaow]

Im an "oldie also" im 41 in a month and had EJ in Nov. I too find that most of the mothers i meet are younger than me though in my mothers group there is another lady that i think is around my age. Sometimes i feel like my bodies a lot older lol especially lifting EJ up and down a bit lol

[MariaO]

Another oldie with only one child here as well - I am definitely the oldest in my mothers group but not by that much. The age range is from 30 to 41 in our mothers group and all first time mothers.

I like to think that it is just a number but the wrinkles might belie that a little bit.
Sometimes I think motherhood at a relatively late age will keep me young, other times I think it has aged me!

[danik]

I've never been one to judge someone on their age or would rule out a friendship due to their age!

I'm turning 31 in 2 days and we are expecting our first bub in October. And the weird thing is that apart from one other couple none of our friends have kids (and only afew of us are married). I think they are still clinging onto their 20's!

[ButterflyKisses]

melbourneprincess, Cathyn, and MariaO welcome to the "older mums with an only child club", hey I might start up a new thread for us so we can compare notes.

PS I still beat you girls I'm still the oldest so far - gee isn't there someone else out there who is older and has a toddler who is an only child - I'm feeling really singled out here :laughing: :laughing:

[Jo_Jo]

still sleeping girls....wake up!!!!

cheers...jo

[Miaow]

I wish i was sleeping lol 5.30 this morning and she was wide awake and didnt wanmt to stay in her cot lol though i spose i cant complain she did this once at 2am lol

[Jo_Jo]

hi girls,
ej was up at 6am so i put him in bed with me "oh no"..lol and he went back to sleep to 7.30 so i am feeling more human now hope all you guys are too, have a great weekend all!!!!:smiliedance:

cheers jo

[sherak]

Anyone still here on this thread? Im looking for any older mums in Cairns.

[KatiesMum]

I wasnt around for the older thread ....

But I am here now :laughing:

I am 36 (soon to be 37 :o) and have a soon-to-be 3 yr old (who thinks she is 10 :laughing:)

Not in Cairns though .. WA here

[kirstenriley]

Hey ladies, Im turning 33 this year and have 3 youngens, 4, 2.5 and 6mths....i find im sort of in the average age at kinder and playgroup ( i think...lol) but dont really get a chance to chat to the other mums much as im too busy chasing the younger kids around and loading them in and out!! lol

[BreakfastatTiffanys]

Good morning all, another older mummy here :D

I have 3 kiddies, 15, 9 and 23months.

Looking forward to :ecomcity: with everyone.

[LuvMy4Babes]

:wave: another oldie here who likes to chat :laughing:

My kids are 10, 8, 6 and 3!

[loving6]

I never thought I would be calling myself an older mum at 35 :o. I have an 15, 9, 8, 5 and a 11mth old. And still thinking about adding to my clan.

[mum_I'm_hungry]

Pretty funny, but I am one of the younger mums where I live and I'm 35 next month! All of the mums in the mothers' group I go to from time to time are over 40, or close to it (with their eldest child around 6 years or so).

Still, yep, I'll admit to being old. I have my entire Clinique stash plastered all over my face as I type!

My kids are 5.5 years and 2.5 years...

[quitecontrary]

Hi! Trying to find another niche here in bubhub land! I'm 41 and home with my two little beautiful babies. Dh is both an academic and a web design contractor with his own new business. He is at home a lot, working a lot too though. My daughter thinks its completely normal to have two laptops on the go on the dining table!
Today I am feeling challenged by my toddler particularly. We are at home (again) and dh is working and I don't know when he'll be back. I have just finished my self-prescribed house "arrest" recovery time after the arrival of young Toby via c/s. I am kind-of hoping to get back into a better routine out of the house soon. Oh yes, and a week after T arrived dh went back to England as his mum had just been diagnosed with lung cancer. She then died the day after he arrived back, so a one week trip was extended to two, and I have never felt so useless in my life as far as supporting him was concerned. Though I was where I needed to be, and there was no way we could have all travelled at that point in time.
So, a potted history of me!
By the way, there is a 40 plus parents thread here - a nice, small bunch of women always up for a chat!

[wantvba2c]

I have found that all the other mums seem to be much younger than me. I thought I was still young until this pregnancy. Ok I do feel much older (body wise) not coping as well physically but I still didnt think I was old.

I get comments from youngers ones that include the words "mums your age" or things like "I know someone your age". WHAT?! My age? What does that mean?

Im 29 and will be 30 at the end of the year.

Anyway, I know some of you girls are older than me but I do sort of know where you are coming from and it is nice to know there are other mums your own age around, they are not all in their teens or early 20's.

I do live in an area that is well known for having a lot of young single mums so I guess that doesnt help my situation.

Ok thats enought for now. Just thought I'd have my say on something I felt I could relate to.

Bye for now:wave:

[Just Add Water]

Wow... I'm not young? I turned 30 last year.. but always felt too old for my years and it wasn't until I hit 26 that I felt the "right" age. I've never really related to age though, my group of friends mixes from 18 - 50+ and I can hold my own with each of them. The mum part is new to me though.. my bub is 8 weeks, however I have been a full time SAHM for over 2 years to my 3 step kids who live with us full time and see their mother for a day once every two or three weeks. We own our own business which keeps things interesting. I'm from the ACT :)

[Pax]

I am ancient i am 38

[Just Add Water]

I am ancient i am 38

I'll have to tell my mother that she's almost done for at 56 then. :laughing:

Who defines what makes an older mum? Personally I know that there are many mums that I know who are 5 years younger than me and they know WAY more than I do about kids.