no heartbeat

[pippa]

hi guys,

we went and had our scan to check if i had a bi-cornate uterus yesterday and i haven't but they couldn't see a heartbeat yesteray so my baby obviously died in the last week and a bit since i had my last scan when they saw a heartbeat.

Had to have a D & C yesterday i am at home now just resting. I feel awful, just so empty and sad. I never thought this would happen to me and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy

Pippa :(

[WeThree]

pippa, my heart goes out to you, i cannot imagine what you must be feeling right now and i am so sorry for your loss. try to get some rest and surround yourself with people who will let you talk and who love you. god bless.

[Elfin]

Pippa I am so sorry too. Just be kind to yourself and if you need to vent you are always welcome to do it here.

[renee101]

Pippa, i'm sorry for your loss.
having been through something similar myself i can partly understand. its hard but be strong and rest,

[Marilyn S]

Hi Pippa,

HUGE HUGS going your way, I have been though this twice before and I agree with you, I would not wish it on my worst enemy.....

I am so sorry you had to go though this, get some rest, cry alot and when your finished, cry some more and always remember this is not your fault (easier said than done) you are wonderful and you did not deserve this......

Not sure if you would like to do this or not, but I named both my babies, I have a Samual and a Jessica.....no matter what people say, your child was real and if you would like to, give them an identity.

with much love
marilyn s

[willsmum]

Pippa,

I understand how you feel. I've been there twice. It's the most lonely feeling in the world.

If it helps you to know that the future can get better, both times I was pregnant again within 3 months.

And by the way, I have a mild bicorneate uterus. All that happened was that when they got too big for the confined space, they got wedged in one position. Both of them had their heads in one "horn" and their knees in the other with their backs pressed against my cervix. This meant that I didn't get much of the usual movements (turning/rolling etc) and I has c-sections both times.

There are more people out there than you think who have been thru this. When I told everyone at work the first time it happened, it seemed that nearly everyone had, or knew someone who had, a miscarriage. In my mum's group, 7 out of 11 of us have had at least one.

Take care of yourself, and grieve. Your loss is real.

[pippa]

Thanx Guys,

We just went to the shop and got a little box with angels on it to put all the little things we had collected in the last 7 weeks and 4 days for our little cherub. It will be our memory box.

Thankyou for all your good thoughts it makes me feel a little stonger and I know one day soon we will hopefully get pregnant again, once we have had time to heal. I know our little cherub is probably up there with the angels and that one day we will meet again, she or he is in a better place. We will always love him or her and we are grateful for the short amount of time we had with our little cherub.

I will let you know how we are getting on, talk to you all soon

Pippa.

[cath]

Hi Pippa,
sorry to hear your news - my thoughts are with you. When I had my miscarriage at 8 weeks I couldn't quite believe that it had happened to me either. Quite a few of our friends had miscarriages in the months before we had ours and I somehow thought that meant we would be okay because the odds have to mean that someone gets through it without miscarrying. I am now pregnant again and keeping my fingers crossed (17 weeks tomorrow) but still feel the loss of my first pregnancy. It is bloody awful. Cry whenever you feel like it ( I became a crying machine and was crying at work and when we went out to the pub with friends - I just couldn't hold it back - felt so miserable). The only positive that I kept trying to focus on was that at least we could get pregnant because not everyone can - that is the the one thing that kept me positive about the future. You will definitely get pregnant again and you will have a successful pregnancy.
For some bizarre reason heaps of people we know (now including myself) miscarried their first pregnancy. Was this your first? I don't know what the story is - maybe our bodies don't know what the foreign little being is and reject it or something but then they are prepared the second time around ( pretty much everyone has got pregnant again and has not miscarried again).
Best of luck for the future and look after yourself.

Cath

[Grace3]

Dear Pippa,

I am very sorry for you and your families loss. It brought tears to my eyes. If there is anything I can do or if you want to talk just let me know.

[mummyb]

hello
i remember that sickening feeling and the words that followed and the sympathetic looks ,i remember crying uncontrollably then feeling nothing at all i remember just wanting my baby back and with her all my hopes and dreams for a future .
and i remember that nothing anybody said made me feel any better.
i hope you are going ok and getting lots of tlc ,it is the sadest thing in the world to lose a baby no matter what stage your at .
i was advised to name our baby even tho we where only 10 weeks a long , it did make a diffrence it made me feel like all that planning hadnt been for nothing that she still had exsisted inside me ,her tiny heart had beat and i had planned a life of great joy for her.
with this post i send great big hugs and even tho it wont make you feel any better i know how your feeling and it will get better ,see i told you no better at all :o
be kind to yourself and take care love briony
oh i named our baby Julia , :p and i cant wait to meet her in heaven.