Are dummies evil?

[LilliS]

Are dummies evil or a godsend?

Before having Caitlin I though dummies were a bad habit to get into and I would regret ever using one. Up to this point I have only given her one on a few occasions to settle her and then take it out asap.

But...as my mum is no longer here (she was staying for 7 weeks)...I gave her a dummy this morning so I could have a shower and get ready because she would not settle after two hours from her feed. Good or bad?

Are there any 'rules' to follow or avoid when using one?

[punkbaby]

Noooo they are lifesavers!! I dont use one for indie she uses her fingers LOL but my middle two had them. The only rule i had was bed time only, sleep time thats it. My dd3 just got rid of hers :( and yeah i know thats bad but it saved sleepless nights and she always put it under her pillow each morning and got it out at nap time etc.

Nothing wrong with using them they help keep us sane i think, i know that ds and dd3 would have been a nightmare if it wasnt for the faithful dummy :)

[~Temet Nosce~]

Yes, yes they are, they will gather and slowly plot their plan for world domination. :devil6:

LOL just kidding. No they were very good for dd as a newborn, a lifesaver. BUT, now, at 7 months, they are indeed a bit of a pain in the @rse because she uses it for sleep, and will quite often wake up looking for it then cry. :rolleyes:

[cheezelz]

I dont think that they are evil. I let DD have her dummy for sleep only. She knows that it stays in the cot and when she gets picked up after a nap she spits it out and it stays there. The only exception to that rule is if she is sick like she is at the moment with rortovirus. My DH hates the look of her with it in her mouth and wont let people see her with it, unless she is sick. I know of a few toddlers who have them and they look horrible. They drool and cant talk poperly with them in their mouths. Ther should be limits on their usage unless the child needs them for settling or if they have an illness.

[~Bec~]

Dummies are wonderful inventions. :D

We figure we will use a dummy now and get rest and sleep ourselves and worry about any orthodontic bills or getting rid of the dummy later OR don't use a dummy and pay for the relationship counselling now. Works for us. :yes:

[Fuchsia!]

they are a godsend in this house! They give them comfort when i am unable to. Why deny them?

If you are happy to use one then go ahead. I think they make life so much easier and quieter!!

[justmum]

Dummies are wonderful, provided they don't rule your life. When he got to about 5 months, my DS kept waking up crying if it fell out when he was asleep so it just had to go. But for the first few months it was fantastic and it looked so cute.

[Lastcenturymum]

Evil? :laughing::devil:

I've never liked dummies and I particularly have never liked seeing older children walking around with them...didn't want my kids to have them..but with two colicky kids I even tried them in desperation..but they wouldn't take them (was secretly please:D)

Like many things in parenting, I figure you do what works for you - you will always find people who don't approve of things you do - that's life. Each to their own!!

[MoOaNdLiTtLePoPpEt]

if you want to use one, use one....it all depends on your thoughts and your bubba.

i used one/still use one...at the moment DS is going thru a realy attachment phase to it..but when he is 18 months ill limit it to sleep only...then slowly wean it off...thats my choice as a parent...others make their choices and that is cool ;)

[elwoodgal]

:thumbsup: for the dummie
Yes, yes they are, they will gather and slowly plot their plan for world domination(quote Amethyst) :laughing:
Love that quote.
I was like many others never going to use a dummie but...
It is all about your sanity. In those first few difficult months I loved the dummie. it was my 2nd best friend (best friend was my breasts).
After those first few months when my DD adjusted herself into a routine, I weaned her off the dummie. I cannot remember when I chucked them. Aprox. 6 months?
What ever works for you I believe is the way to go.

elwoodgal

[MissSookyLaLa]

hey lil,

nick has one when he has a tummy ache...it helps him with the pain and to pass the wind/poo...whatever else it is! :laughing:

He hasn't taken to falling asleep with it in, and I will try and keep it that way, as I have heard too many horror stories about bubs who get into the habit of sleeping with a dummy and then you spend your entire night getting up to put it back in every time it falls out...

[zenifa]

Evil or a godsend.
Hard to say really, could be a bit of both really.

Before I had DD1, I was adamant about not using dummies, but she needed a lot of soothing, so using one worked for us, it really helped her with settling and sleeping. Now 2.5yrs down the track, we see the downside, she is more dependent now on it than ever - we have tried a few times to wean her without success, but let it go, as we had DD2 4.5mths ago, so it was a big adjustment for her.

I think in hindsight we should of weaned her after 12mths, the longer we left it the harder it has become. She only uses it for sleeping (night and day) and sometimes for car sleeps.
We also have used other 'props' like a comfort toy (DD1 has a lamb), and in her cot she used the 'fp ocean wonders aquarium' plus music.
She doesn't need the others just her lamb and dummy.

Intererstingly, DD2 doesn't like the dummy, so we may not have the issue with her at all.

Each baby has different needs and sometimes you need to adjust your parenting to fit in with that.

[tootiredtosleep]

Love them, DD's favourites are Mam dummies, which are quite expensive, but worth every cent.
She is 2 in a few months and still has a dummy to sleep, and sometimes in the pram when we are out, if she is cranky.
DH isn't such a fan, probably because he has to get up in the night and put it back in sometimes!

[Areca]

I never used one with DD1 (but I wanted her to take one, she just wouldn't) then I was glad I'd done the hard yards in the beginning with constant re-settling etc. cause I didn't have to wean her off it later.

DD2 I just decided I wouldn't even bother. We went through 8 weeks of a baby needing to suck but being a bit colicky so not wanting to bf for comfort and I gave in. At 4 months old they started becoming a real nuisance. She'd pull it out just as she was about to go to sleep and play with it, and wake herself up! Then it's fall out and she'd wake up. I ended up standing over her cot holding the dummy in to try and get her to sleep one day and when SH come home that night I told him that the dummies were going and I took them all away and that was the end of it.

I think they're fine as long as they aren't a nuisance. If they are becoming more trouble than they are worth then it's time for them to go.

My personal preference was that it was for sleep time only. I don't like to see a baby playing with a dummy in their mouth. And I really don't like seeing 2 and 3 year olds run around with one in their mouth so I made it for sleep time only so that I wouldn't have that problem.

In our ante natal classes with DD1 the childbirth educator said to us that you would know if you were over using a dummy by your photo's. If almost all the photo's are with a dummy in the baby's mouth then time to cut back on the dummy usage! I think that's a good rule!

[Little Gorilla]

They are not evil - they are an addiction:devil:

Both my son and me are addicted - he is 3 and still has his dummy to fall asleep and in the car....I don't know who will miss him having it most - me or him....the poor dummy will have to make its exit one day....I just keep putting that day off:shame:

[neostudded]

Yes, yes they are, they will gather and slowly plot their plan for world domination. :devil6:
It is true, Julius dropped once the other night, I went to pick it up but I couldnt find it...I heard whispering...it was coming from a large box under the bed...I moved closer, closer, closer...And I looked though the hole in the box.In it there was 10 dummies sitting in chairs, they were looking towards a screen.On the screen, there was a larger happy baby dummy, they were all planing on world domination...It was terrible.:crying::devil6:

Dummies are great for settling babies and great if you dont want to let them comfort suck.

[Nanay]

I was one of those adamant mothers who did not want ds having one..but he was a colicky windy baby and loves to suck so we gave him one .. with the rule that it is only used for sleep. He is now 14 months old and weaned... iweaned him last month, i was surprised how easy it was after a couple of days...

They were great, the only reason i weaned him off is because i was constantly doing dummy runs in the middle of the night...

[RedPanda]

I am desperately hoping this baby will take a dummy! They are great settling tools, and as long as your child eventually gives it up (which it will - you don't see many 21-year-olds with dummies!), it's no problem.

It depends on the child though. I really wanted my son to take a dummy, but he wouldn't have a bar of it. He's just never had one. I'd put one in his mouth and he'd push it out straight away with his tongue.

[the_queen]

They are addictive, some kids will get very addicted to them and they can't sleep or settle without them, and it's awful having to wean them off of it.

My daughter was an addict, my son thinks they're hilarious and sticks them in his mouth but doesn't know what to do with them :laughing: I purposely didn't want him to have one because of the stress and awfulness of my daughter's dummy addiction. I've always used the boob to comfort/settle him and put him to sleep so there's never been an occasion where I've said to myself "perhaps I'll just try a dummy". I think everyone should do things like that - but all babies are different, some babies won't feed to sleep, some babies won't comfort suck.

But in terms of 'evil' - I hate when newborns are given dummies as a matter of course. I completely understand when parents resort to dummies. But a newborn's desire to suck is part of the baby sorting out mum's milk supply - so comfort sucking should be on the boob.

:laughing: Neo you makeded me larf :laughing:

[Crazy Monkey]

Whatever works!!!

DS has a dummy, but only for sleep (he's nearly 3)... I personally don't like seeing kids of his age running around with a dummy, so he doesn't get it unless he's in bed...

With DD, I've tired to get her to have it when she's been really fussy but she doesn't like it...

[squiglet]

Only if you call a life saving device that calms your baby and stops the screaming evil:p

I used to think I would never use a dummy. Now I can't remember why I thought that?
I have several ready to use in dd nursery, one to use and one just in case in the nappy bag.
God I love the dummy:o

[Queen]

Love em love em love em

DD has one only for sleep...absolutely a sane keeper....

[delirium]

Both my kiddies have had a dummy. The secret is only allowing them at sleep time, so they only associate the dum with sleep. Sometimes kids need to comfort suck, mine both did.

The only way I would say they are bad is the whole nipple confusion debate with bf babies. Whilst I didn't bf mine for long, so I really don't have much knowledge, I have heard the dummy can confuse young bf babies, who then reject the breast.

[Widget]

Decided before Annabelle was born that I wanted her on the dummy, not sure why, but wanted her on one... She took one for 3 months then absolutely refused them, every single one of them!! Decided I didn't want Becca on a dummy at all as Annabelle did quite well self settling, but I couldn't take the constant sucking on my boob once she was asleep and as soon as I pulled her off, she'd want to suck again, even though she wasn't eating! She's a sucker and takes the dummy and am hoping that she refuses it on her own soon (2 months old now). I'd much rather a baby who settles on a dummy than a baby who doesn't settle at all unless attached to you... Seeing that I'm not BF anymore, the dummy is most certainly a life saver!!

[Susan Mac]

personally don't like dummies, but I do think that bottlefed babies should be offered a dummy because they don't get the same sucking satisfaction as demand fed breastfed babies. different situation for every family, and if it works for you do it.

[the_queen]

:iagree: Very good point Susan

[Widget]

The only way I would say they are bad is the whole nipple confusion debate with bf babies. Whilst I didn't bf mine for long, so I really don't have much knowledge, I have heard the dummy can confuse young bf babies, who then reject the breast.

I asked my MCHN about that same thing before I gave DD2 the dummy... She said that as long as I don't try and hold off feeds with a dummy she will accept me no dramas... I stopped BFing coz my nipples couldn't take it anymore... nothing to do with the dummy...

[Ana Gram]

Whatever works. And thank your lucky stars you don't have a thumb sucker. Getting rid of a dummy is easy in comparison to getting a hardcore thumb sucker to stop! Can't exactly cut off her thumbs.

[mel79]

I asked my MCHN about that same thing before I gave DD2 the dummy... She said that as long as I don't try and hold off feeds with a dummy she will accept me no dramas... I stopped BFing coz my nipples couldn't take it anymore... nothing to do with the dummy...


I thought that sore nipples was the reason that you were meant to avoid dummies if your breastfeeding - cos the sucking action on a dummy is different to the sucking action at the breast - and bubs gets used to sucking on a dummy and tries to suck on boobie the same way, which then causes sore nipples...??? :confused:
Maybe someone can enlighten me...

I don't know - i've been trying to give DS a dummy since he was about 10 weeks old to settle him to sleep and he just doesnt like it (ive tried soooo many diff types too!!) When i found that the only way he would settle to sleep some nights was for me to put him in his bed whilst still attached to my nipple - that was about the point where I thought maybe a dummy was needed!! :o
Some nights he'll take it, some nights he just wants to suck on his fingers or his little cloth doll.

[SorenLorensen]

Whatever works. And thank your lucky stars you don't have a thumb sucker. Getting rid of a dummy is easy in comparison to getting a hardcore thumb sucker to stop! Can't exactly cut off her thumbs.
:iagree:
we are trying a new approach of just casually saying "take your thumb out hunny"
she takes it out right away, and in the blink of an eye its right back in there......i don't think she even realises she is doing it anymore

[Widget]

My nipples weren't sore from the dummy, they were sore from poor attachment. No matter what I tried, she wouldn't attach properly... They were sore before I gave her the dummy the first time... I stupidly perservered through 6 weeks of horrendous nipple pain before I "gave in" to a bottle, my nipples were too sore to even express for her, so it was straight to formula...

It might effect the suckling of the nipple, honestly I wouldn't know because while I could feel her tongue flickering so softly on my nipple, she only ever attached properly 4 times and doing the same thing the next feed had poor attachment again...

I found the bottle hindered the BF more than what the dummy did...

[LilliS]

personally don't like dummies, but I do think that bottlefed babies should be offered a dummy because they don't get the same sucking satisfaction as demand fed breastfed babies. different situation for every family, and if it works for you do it.

What do you mean by sucking satisfaction? Caitlin is bottle-fed EBM, on demand, so interested in your answer.

[our little treasures]

Love them, DD's favourites are Mam dummies, which are quite expensive, but worth every cent.
She is 2 in a few months and still has a dummy to sleep, and sometimes in the pram when we are out, if she is cranky.
DH isn't such a fan, probably because he has to get up in the night and put it back in sometimes!
We love Mam as well and I love the I love mummy/ daddy ones

It is true, Julius dropped once the other night, I went to pick it up but I couldnt find it...I heard whispering...it was coming from a large box under the bed...I moved closer, closer, closer...And I looked though the hole in the box.In it there was 10 dummies sitting in chairs, they were looking towards a screen.On the screen, there was a larger happy baby dummy, they were all planing on world domination...It was terrible.:crying::devil6:

Dummies are great for settling babies and great if you dont want to let them comfort suck.
With your threads in the spiritual section I almost believed you;)



personally don't like dummies, but I do think that bottlefed babies should be offered a dummy because they don't get the same sucking satisfaction as demand fed breastfed babies. different situation for every family, and if it works for you do it.
I have to say I am opposite. I BF all 3 of mine and had 2 who would have fed 24/7 if I didn't give the dummy my sil told me I shouldn't need them as I am bf:rolleyes: I have never had an issue with milk supply etc.

I think they are a god send. Although you get worried about taking them off the child it really isn't that hard:no: even my DS who was an addict.

[Ana Gram]

:iagree:
we are trying a new approach of just casually saying "take your thumb out hunny"
she takes it out right away, and in the blink of an eye its right back in there......i don't think she even realises she is doing it anymore

*Sigh* wish that worked on Ruby. She just says no and sucks her thumb more.

[WorkingClassMum]

Can't exactly cut off her thumbs.


:eek:Ohhhh! damm - I told DD that I would;)

[WorkingClassMum]

personally don't like dummies, but I do think that bottlefed babies should be offered a dummy because they don't get the same sucking satisfaction as demand fed breastfed babies.


my experience is the opposite

DS was breast feed and it was struggle to get the damm dummy off him

DD never took a dummy - not even when we duct taped to her face, and was bottle fed


But hey - if it works - go for it.

[mum_inlove]

I don't have a problem with dummies.

Ds used one from when he was 2 days old. I had to wean him off it when he was 3 months old as it was causing more sleep problem then rather than helped him to sleep.

Dd still isn't very interested in dummy. She self settles, and I do watch for her tired signs very closely. If I put her in bed just at the right time, she'll goes to sleep with no fuss. But when she's a bit unsettled, I'd give her the dummy. Normally it'll stay in her mouth for 30 seconds, until she drift off to sleep.

But yeah, we were trying really hard to get her to take the dummy as she was gonna suck on her thumb :yes:

[naiwen]

In our case good, the lactation consultants in the SCN said that as Edward was born without having leant to suck we had to use a teeny tiny one too teach him. She also said the pigeon step one dummies are the best for breastfed babies as they are flatter. My main concern with dummies is hygiene but as long as you are vidgilant about keeping them clean it's fine IMO.