In Laws

[thepanda]

Hi all,

Just wandering if any of you had any in-law problems or had any really great in-laws? I know my mother in-law can really be a handful to her kids and mostly to her in-laws. She says awful things and is also a troublemaker. :thumbsdown: Does anyone have any theories about meddling mother in-laws or why some mother in-laws can turn into monsters?:devil6: I just hope that I never become a painful mother in-law later on.

Manda :detective:
The Panda
Connor 1
Luke

[MumsieMel]

Cause they cant let go of their kids, let them lead their own life. :shame: :banghead:

[EDIOH]

My soon to be in laws are great. Very friendly helpfull people. But i feel sorry for my DP because my parent dont like him and want me to be with someone else. My Dp doesnt hate my parents but resents them for maing me so unhappy.

Not happy with that at all :shame:

[bronny-jane]

my in-laws are great we get along so well, might be because they live in darwin and we are in nsw. dh gets along with my parents well to. but my parents dont like my other brothers and sisters partners.

guess we're just lucky:D

[jaimie]

I know its sounds awful but my in-laws are users. My husband owns amechanical business and they drove 45 mins to his work one sat and it happened to be his first sat off in months. When they realised he wasnt there and couldnt work on their car they turned around and went home. Now we only live 2 mins down the road. Dont you think you would drive that 2 mins down the road to see your granddaughter?:mad:

[Jackson84]

heya,
my MIL were great and then it crashed and burned. she doesnt talk to me anymore.

but my DH and my mum get along famously (i get along with her too LOL).

i guess you never can tell how they will react.

[cupcakemafia]

well its not JUST my mother-in-law (although shes the main instigator of all the trouble).. seems like everyone who marries into that family gets completely rejected/emotionally beaten up and spat out. I thought it was just me, but after talking to a few other Outsiders (as we call ourselves - husbands and wives that have married into my husband's family) we realise its just an ongoing thing with that family.

Some random acts of horribleness:

1. One of my husband's aunts commented to my mother in law, in an email that I "mistakenly" received in my inbox, that she "hoped the bbq (that they'd bought as a wedding present for us) would drop on my head when I set it up".

2. At our wedding, the whole family completely seperated themselves from the rest of the reception guests, except for when my MIL went around to all my family's friends and told them all that "if the **** family had organised this occasion, they'd be a LOT more food". Never mind that it was only a cocktail party and the nibblies that were being served were being taken off the waiters and put on my husband's family's table so noone else could eat. I had a waiter actually come up to me during the night saying how sorry he was that he hadn't got around to my older relatives with the food but unfortunately "your in-laws seem to be taking whole platters off all our waiters and passing it around amongst themselves until theres nothing left".

3. When my MIL found out I was pregnant, she said she hoped our children would be ungrateful little sh**s like my husband turned out to be and she wished that they'd make us "as miserable as we've made her".

Argh! I could go on but I just realised I've been venting for quite a while now. Sorry about that! Makes me so mad though, but I try not to vent "in the real world" because it makes my husband feel bad - its his mother but at the same time he feels **** because she's being such a psycho.

Funny thing though - we used to get along SO WELL his mother and I .... until the day my husband announced to her that he'd asked me to marry him.

Go figure.

[Briswegian]

My MIL is great but she does live in the UK! Actually she's visiting as of tomorrow to see our new bub.
My FIL though is crazy. I told him after some tantrumy aggressive behaviour that his children may put up with that but I won't and nor will my children. Three strikes and you're out. I got an apology and when last I saw him (also lives in the UK) he was on his best behavour and it nearly killed him.
I have family members (grandparents and uncles) that I don't speak to anymore and haven't for years. I know it's not exactly the same....we were all really close but I got sick of them doing things to hurt me and my brothers and then saying how much they loved us or whatever so one day I just told one of them on the phone that I didn't want to see them anymore and why. this was really serious abuse though) Gosh it was REALLY hard but my life has been happier for it. My parents were surprisingly supportive and my mum said....well dear it is just an accident of birth that you're related to them.
I guess I'm saying, I will give everyone every chance to all get along but if it aint working then why waste your energy. I'm not saying that ceasing contact is the answer for every situation but if it's sucking you dry it's good to come up with a plan for how you're going to handle it. We can only control our own behaviour so I've found focussing on that helps.

[Purple_Haze]

I think I did REALLY well in the in laws department. They look after me as if I was one of their own :yelclap: I've never had any issues with either of them, at the moment my FIL is helping me get through one of my uni courses which I am having alot of difficulty with. DP gets along well with my parents too, he invites them over on average about once a fortnight and cooks for them (he use to be a chef)

[diamonds22]

my mother/father in-laws are great..i even call them Mama and Dad:eek: (heheh were not even officially married yet)

but there is one sister inlaw I don't really get along with (but she doesn’t get along with anyone) and all I do is try to ignore her...I use to let her have snide remarks...but now I just give it back..or ignore/stay out of her way and not worry about her.

I remember when I first met them all and the sister in law was sooo rude...she yelled out across the table "and how old are you ..." (i think its rude to ask someone’s age wether or not they are old or not) because I was only 18 back then and trying to make a good impression i answered...but i was sooo ****ed off about it...they acted like i was just 'some girlfriend' and didnt take me seriously...but 5years later i'm still around and always will be...so i guess the best thing for you to do is just try and ignore them if they start on you...just remember..families LOVE gossip..so just don't give em any.

Good luck:fingerscrossed:

[littlepickle]

I am one of the lucky ones, my inlaws are great. I think the trick is to not get too involved in each others lives. Works for us:smiliedance:

[the_queen]

My IL's all live interstate. Even better, my family all live at least 3 hours away as well! So me and DH don't have many IL iss-ewes.

[Annasmum]

I don't quite have the in-laws from hell, but sometimes I think they are close. They never bothered to come and see us before DD was born and then all of a sudden it was all about the baby. I had a CS and they turned up a couple of hours after the birth. To make matters worse to this day they didn't buy her anything when she was born or baptised and for her first birthday she was given a golden book. My MIL keeps on thanking me for looking after her son and grandchild, I don't even get a look in. We have been together since 1994 and announced our engagement in 2000 and that was when she decided I was part of the family and should stop calling her Mrs....... Sorry got carried away a little bit.
One other niggling fact, they live an hours drive from us and are retired. However they still expect us to go and see them regardless of the fact that we both work 5 days a week. :banghead:

DH is lucky as my parents treat him and all their daughter-in-laws as if they were their parents. Some people have all the luck. :ecomcity:

[squiglet]

Oh my :eek: There are some shocking Mil's out there.

I was going to say a couple of niggly things about my Mil but as it turns out I am lucky to have her, and she is quite nice to me.

It's my own parents that I have a prob with:(

[RedPanda]

I'm very lucky with my ILs. They are supportive and wonderful! My DH also gets along well with my parents, which is good.:D

[HugsAndKisses]

well my soon to be inlaws are very hard to work out..... :confused:

there very controlling and everything they say and do is totally right :rolleyes:
but then there also heaps nice to me at times and i feel so close to them, so its weird cus i just never know. but i just think that living away from in laws makes life so much sweeter.

we used to live in my Dp's grandparents granny flat and it was just insane... not cause of his granparents (although it did make us feel like kids) but because MIL and FIL knew everything and had something to say all the time.
plus if it wasn't already bad enough i was also working for them in there cafe.

I remember a day at work MIL an I were discussing divorce's and she said if i ever divorced her son she'd take my little boy off me:mad:
i can't even tell you how furious i was but i couldn't say too much at the time but will never forget wat she said.:crying:

we moved to coffs harbour to get our independence and space an we are so happy we did. my Dp an I miss both our parents alot but when we see them for a weekend we all get along alot better.

[kymmy]

I feel lucky
All my in laws are wonderful:yes:

[mum33]

i hate my inlaws and i'll tell u why

its a long story so i'll give u the short version, although still very long sorry.

i cut the inlaws out of my life after finding out i was pregnant as the heartless b****ds tried to force me to have an abortion. we were actively TTC with our son but somehow convinced (brainwashed) DP he was too young to have a child and that i trapped him by getting pregnant and i was ruining his life. i wont even go into the things FIL said about me.

we spilt up and i had my heart ripped in half and my spirit broken. it was the absolutely worst experience of my life. and i hate them with every bone in my body for everything they've said and did to me.

when DS was born, the day after MIL, SIL, DP's mate & partner and son came to the hospital. DP asked me if it was alright for MIL to see DS. i must have been still high on the gas as i said yes. now i deeply regret it. they dont realise (or dont care) the hurt they put me through. they undermine my parenting skills, i tell them no swearing around RJ, they ignore me and promptly tell me he will learn to swear at their house (over my cold dead body!!! he wont be going to your house anymore if thats the case!!!) when they do or say things i dont like they dont come out and say it, they sneakily make snide remarks and comments. instead of asking me "when are you coming out to vist next?" its talkin to baby so i can hear and telling him "give me a kiss coz i dont know when i'll see you again". it s**ts me so badly.

and to see people that are so cruel and heartless and doing everything they can to force me to have an abortion, and the way they treated me, then dote on DS like nothing had ever happened and as if they are the best grandparents in the world, makes me wanna :barf: they are just nasty people in general and i'd rather not have anything to do with them. :banghead:

one day i'm gonna get the guts up to say something to them and hopefully the result is them being out of mine and DS life. he doesnt need to know people like them. and i am so sorry my poor son has to be related to them. when DS is old enough, he will know all this about his grandparents as i will be telling him everything and it will be up to him whether he wants anything to do with him. hopefully he realises before then what demon people they are and decides before then he doesnt want them in his life.

and i hust hope one day DP sees them for who they really are because he thinks the sun shines out of their a**-h**es although they too treat him like cr@p. the unfortunate thing is DP works for FIL and is where half our income comes from :banghead:

i wish bad, bad things happen to my inlaws. i used to believe in karma but now i am not so sure. they put me through so much, and nothing bad ever happens to them. its not fair.

[iluvmeboyz]

:hugs: oh Krisrie you poor thing i didnt know you had broken up when or b4 that oyu where preg i used to belike yo and not say anything but now i do cause there my kids and they have no say in the matter at all.So eventually you might get the courage to say something back to them that out them in there place.

[FourAngelKisses]

Wow, no wonder you hate them, I would too. :hugs:


I must be bleesed, I love my inlaws. They have never said a bad word about me, DH or our kids. We see them almost on a daily basis (well, it is on a daily basis now that we are using their washing machine, lol) and I love going there.

[Mum2AandJ]

OMG... There are some really nasty MIL's