Blighted ovum at 12 weeks

[beezee78]

We went for our 12 week scan today only to find that there is no baby - I've been told that I have a blighted ovum and that I should start to miscarry within the next 6 weeks (or I can choose to go in for a D&C).

This will be my first miscarriage. After two healthy children the possibility of this happening hadn't really occurred to me before today (bit naive I know!). I had honestly not been worried about it - especially as I'd considered that I'd passed the 12 week magic marker with no problems.

Anyway, it's been a fair shock to the system. We went in there expecting one outcome and have walked out with another outcome completely. I do have to say it was a bit of a strange pregnancy (no sore boobs or tiredness for weeks now) but I've continued having morning sickness and my stomach has been growing steadily out. No pain, no bleeding, nothing to indicate that things weren't progressing normally so I'd still assumed all was fine.

I feel like I should have had bleeding or something to indicate that things weren't right and I would have thought that I would have miscarried before 12 weeks??? Does anyone know what the usual timeframe is for the body to naturally miscarry in this situation???

I guess it's just normal emotions in this situation but I can't believe how guilty I feel (maybe I did something wrong etc). I feel pretty ripped off too - three months of taking my pregnancy supplements, beginning preparations for a new baby, months of morning sickness etc and now to be told there is no baby there at all.

Anyway, just needed to vent ... still sorting through it all and trying to pull myself together for a D&C so I can start moving on again.

:(

Thanks,
Belinda

[SilverStarfish]

:hugs: what a terrible shock for you!

[Jinglebells]

:hugs::hugs: sorry to hear that your scan didn't go so well

its awfull going into a scan expecting to see a little moving baby in there, and then leaving the scan broken hearted

to answer your question, there is no time frame to miscarry, it can take weeks and weeks for your body to do its thing,

when I was preg the second time round, I went for my scan, and found that bubs had died at 7wks, was awfull, cause I had showen no signs of miscarrying or anything I decided to go in for a d&c, was alot easier to me to deal with, rather than wait for it to happen

be good to yourself, it wasn't anything that you did or didn't do to cause this :hugs:

[Manxie]

Hi

I am so sorry for you loss:hugs:

A lot of what you wrote really rung bells with me. I had a missed m/c back in August last year. I thought I was eleven weeks (so almost at the magic 12 week mark) and started the tinest bit of spotting. An ultrasound showed that the baby had only made it to 7 weeks 2 days. My tummy had also just popped.

I was paranoid with my first pregnancy that I would m/c but I also hadnt really thought about it with this one.

So as for time frame for you to miscarry as you can see for four weeks my body didnt do anything. so its really hard to know. I also chose to have a d&c as I had a strong urge to get the baby out. Sounds terrible I know:( I also wanted to be able to
move forward and be able to try again fairly quickly.

I can just say that all you are feeling is perfectly normal. I could have written your post word for word back in August.

As you know deep down it really wasnt your fault:hugs: Take good care of yourself :hugs:

[kas3]

I'm so sorry :hugs:

I had a "missed" miscarriage last October - no bleeding, no cramping etc.

I found out the baby didn't have a heartbeat at the first u/s on the Monday - big shock, I didn't know it could happen like that - and had a d&c on the Friday.

It was hard, but for me it was the best decision. I was told it could take weeks, even months, before I started bleeding and I couldn't face that.

There are plenty of people who let it happen naturally though. It really is an individual decision. Do what feels best for you.

And most importantly, take care of yourself.

regards
kas

[Duchessa]

Hi Belinda,

I'm so sorry for you loss. It is a horrible thing to find out.

I had a blighted ovum, discovered at 12 weeks back in April this year. It was my third miscarriage in a row. I had a d and c immediately partly cos I had been trying to conceive for eighteen months at that stage and didn't want to wait any longer than necessary and partly because we live very remotely and I didn't want to have to drive back.

It worked for me to have the closure and not to have to wait for the moment when I miscarried, though I suspect that I wasn't far off miscarrying when I had the scan - I had begun to spot and have the odd bout of cramping.

It is an awful thing to think that you have made it to the safe part only to have it whisked away. Be kind to yourself.

If it gives you any hope, I conceived again 6 weeks after the d&c - I have carried the pregnancy to term (well, I'm 38+ weeks now).

xx

[busymummyof4]

Belinda :hugs: :hugs:
Its really a completely awful time to be going thru and I can only offer you the knowledge that others have been there and you will get thru it. I didnt think so at the time, but time is a healer.

I had a blighted ovum back in 03 and found out at about 8 weeks. I really thought it was going to be a viable pregnancy at the time. I had plenty of morning sickness, constant complete tiredness too so really thought it was a stayer. I really didnt get my head around how, why or what a blighted ovum is really. I like Duchessa, just wanted closure, so I had a D & C pretty much straight away. I was in the UK at the time, no family, DH who worked away and had to come home. It wasnt nice but it seems like a faded distant memory now.
I conceived 3 months later just for the record.

All the best. I hope you feel better soon

Danielle

[elwoodgal]

Same as others. My last MC was at 10 weeks & I had to have a D & C that day. I could not deal emotionally with dragging things out.
I knew something was wrong for 2-3 days before & rang my male gyno (do not see him now) who thought I was over reacting but agreed to see me. He gave me a physical & said I was worrying unnecessarily but would do an Ultrsound anyway.
No heartbeat.
It is so sad & people telling you that clearly it wasn't meant to be does not help.
Take care of yourself & let yourself grieve for your loss.

elwoodgal

elwoodgal

[hp-mum]

I am so sorry to hear your loss, :hugs::hugs: it is horrible to see that empty screen.

I went through exactly the same thing last year. It was my first pregnancy and I had all the right symptoms including m/s, then at my 12 week scan found out I had a blighted Ovum. It was devastating. :crying:

I had no spotting or pain. I chose to have a d&c because I didn't want to go through the waiting game and just wanted closure. I had the d&c 4 days after my scan and I remember laying in the hospital bed before I went in feeling major period pain coming on, so maybe it was starting to happen then? I guess they did the procedure in the nick of time.

It took me 8 months to fall PG again, now I'm 16 weeks.

Goodluck hun, I wish you all the best and I know the pain you feel. I hope the next few months treat you kindly. :hugs::hugs:

[Crazy Bananas]

sorry for your loss. I know what it's like to go for scan and to see that the baby is no longer. I went for my first scan baby was fine had a heartbeat then had my second scan to discover no heartbeat. Bubs died around 6 or 7 weeks i had no bleeding nothing no indication. So i found out bubs had stayed in there for a good 3+ weeks (after passing over) ended up having a dnc cause bubs wasn't coming out by itself. I had my dnc in dec and now am preggas again.

[beezee78]

Thanks for all your responses. I'm going to have a D&C done myself on Tuesday next week. Like everyone else I need to have it over and done with now to be able to move on. It's not a nice time in the interim though. I am unable to get time off work till next week so am really struggling to keep my chin up till then. I think I just need a week to take stock of things and get back on track.

I've got minor cramping off and on now and the obs had said that my placenta was starting to bleed when he scanned yesterday. Fingers crossed I make it through to surgery next week!

We'll be okay ... reading through the other posts it really strikes a chord as some of the comments were very close to home. The empty screen when you see it is indeed a terrible moment for any expectant parent ... and it's all over so suddenly that you seem to spend the next few days wandering around in a daze.

To us it was still a "baby" for 12 weeks and even though we technically know that no baby developed it's hard to get that through your head when you had (and still have) all the symptoms of pregnancy.

BTW ... the term "blighted ovum" is a terrible turn of phrase!!!

[angelickaren]

so sorry for your loss :hugs:

[Taveon]

Beezee78,

The medical terminology used is often quite abrupt and rude to mums who have been trying so long to conceive.

I miscarried early, and in my opinion, I lost a real baby, not just "Product of Conception".

Doctors/Nurses/Midwives, need to be more considerate of the emotions involved. The terminology can often leade to depression.

Your fellow Bub Hubbers are with you all the way.

You were 'pregnant'...and you will be again.

Go have your D&C, rest up, give your body some recoup and try again.

God Bless.

[busymummyof4]

BTW ... the term "blighted ovum" is a terrible turn of phrase!!!

:iagree: I still really haven't got my head around it and it happened 5 years ago.

:hugs:to you. There will be a rainbow at the end of this!!

[Pauline70]

:hugs::hugs: - hope all goes well with D&C. Some of the medical terms used for m/c are horrible - I remember seeing "missed abortion" on one of my blood tests and commented to the doctor how distressing the wording was to me :thumbsdown: when I was in the process of miscarrying.

[SammyG]

I could have written word for word a lot of these posts. I miscarried at 11weeks, bubs called a 'blighted ovum' that probably hadn't progressed past 7weeks. I had started spotting and Dr had me scanned within hours but not booked in for a D&C for a few days. Unfortunately my body couldn't hold out that long and I had a nasty experience in emergency waiting for pain relief and for insensitive staff to finally close curtains properly as I was quite a sight haemoraging all over the place - sorry TMI.
I recovered extremely quickly though, didn't even need a panadol after emergency surgery and conceived after 1 normal cycle - the little devil :devil: is now almost 13months.

Time will help, I also found acknowlegement of our loss was helpful but I didn't feel the need to talk details except here with people who really understood.

:hugs::hugs::hugs:

[mumtobeTina]

well, im also in the same situaton. Had a blighted ovum at 9 weeks, and waited for things to happen naturally. 2 weeks later i decided that i needed closure so went in for a DNC. Was pretty pain free, however i bled afterwards for weeks...
this was in December. I just had my first AF at the beginning of this month, so we are TTC again. I am so desperate to fall pregnant again. I certainly understand the feeling of being "ripped off". It was to be our first, and we couldnt have been happier. Just to add to the pain, my SIL announced that she was pregnant 2 days after my DNC. So i am really struggling with that as she is 2 weeks behind where i would have been, so everytime i see her or talk to her i am reminded of my own loss:crying: