convinced DH now just not sure if i should

[bebealice]

I have read all the last posts for several months about deciding to have another baby or not - truth be told that since having number 4 I have been almost psychotic or at least thinking about having another baby constantly since then - am not sure if due to fact had secretly expected would have boy at #4 even tho have boy 8 girl 5 3/4 girl 3 3/4 and girl 20/12. It was something that really shocked myself as felt like similar threads to point where considered tampering with contraception which is unfair but eventually confessed to my DH who initially for last 12/12 has "stonewalled" ie don't bring it up and it might go away but now after another lengthy discussion has had the guts to say if it is what I really want then he will support me - it is funny now that I am thinking of all of the negative things for eg all of the people who already look at me with 4 kids, the parents and in-laws who make jokes about don't we have a TV and even tho do little will think it is more responsibility for them and friends/acquaintances who I think " feel sorry" for me - at the end of it everybody works out how many kids they should have and nobody should pass judgement if you are able to afford financially and emotionally to provide a loving home - it is hard work but very rewarding and when i feel tired from the noise and the mess i think how fleeting all of this is - in ten to fifteen years they will all be gone and luckily i will have the result of hopefully five children and their offspring to enjoy - in saying all of that I am confused as to whether i am doing the right thing by everybody else in wanting to have another child :confused::)

[BeachBaby3]

I know how you feel. If you have read the other posts about DH will be kicking himself, you will know that I had a miscalculation last week. Whilst I always wanted a 4th, DH didn't. Last week was a genuine mistake on my behalf and now I wait to see my fate, No AF yet BTW!

I have to admit I now wonder how I will feel if I am pregnant! The noise in our house can reach ridiculous levels some days, and don't get me started on the mess...

I worry that my older 2 will suffer. DS1 has his year 3 exams this year and needs support, DS2 is a very sensitive soul who really suffered when DD got introduced 5years after he was the baby of the family, and how will DD cope having been practically an only child during the day for so long.
I worry about the finances, will we ever afford our own home if we keep having babies?
Will I want number 5 once number 4 ( if there is a number 4) has reached the age of 2???

Sorry I've hijacked your post. I don't have the answers but I do know how you feel. :hugs:

[forbetoel]

I think it is quite normal to second guess yourself, and question your decision.

For what it's worth number 4 bubs for me is just pure enjoyment, and the joy I get from watching him interact with the older three kids is just magic.

My older 3 spoil him like crazy, he is like a trillion blessings all wrapped up in one little boy.

I also love the dynamics of having 4. Goodluck.

[Miss_Vicki]

i think if you want another just go for it , Dont worry what other ppl think an say , You know what you need an want :D

some days i would LOVE to have 4 or more kids ;)

[bebealice]

I know how you feel. If you have read the other posts about DH will be kicking himself, you will know that I had a miscalculation last week. Whilst I always wanted a 4th, DH didn't. Last week was a genuine mistake on my behalf and now I wait to see my fate, No AF yet BTW!

I have to admit I now wonder how I will feel if I am pregnant! The noise in our house can reach ridiculous levels some days, and don't get me started on the mess...

I worry that my older 2 will suffer. DS1 has his year 3 exams this year and needs support, DS2 is a very sensitive soul who really suffered when DD got introduced 5years after he was the baby of the family, and how will DD cope having been practically an only child during the day for so long.
I worry about the finances, will we ever afford our own home if we keep having babies?
Will I want number 5 once number 4 ( if there is a number 4) has reached the age of 2???

Sorry I've hijacked your post. I don't have the answers but I do know how you feel. :hugs:
I have the same fears about introducing a fifth into the equation as life is really starting to settle down again- but at what effect on others with less time with mum - however in seeing the absolute benefits and sheer love and joy that our fourth child has brought to all in the family i can say for us it has only been positive - even tho there may be less one on one time with mum there is such a bond between our kids and i guess that is what they gain as an upside to a larger family - i guess also my philosophy for my children is that they are encouraged to be resilient yet with a strong supportive and loving background

[kritti]

We only have two at the moment and are ttc#3 (hopefully pink) and DH was adamant that 3 is the end. However, I am not sure that 3 will be all I am happy with.
Even though we only have two we have had comments from family members that we should not have any more - it is no-one else's business how many kids you have. As long as you can love them, feed them and give them a roof over their heads it doesn't matter.

I say if you think you can cope phsyically and emotionally then go ahead.
I hope you get your blue bundle soon if you decide that is what you want.

[LuvMy4Babes]

Wow I could have almost written your post word for word. We have 4 also and are considering a 5th. The thought of another baby both excites me and scares the **** out of me to be honest. But I also remember feeling that way with #4 so I know once all is said and done, having a new baby in the house is absolutely wonderful.

Oh for a crystal ball right about now.......

Good luck with your decision, I wish I could help more but I am in the same boat.