discipline & someone else's kid

[willsmum]

Our previously safe playgroup has been invaded by a couple of toddler terrorists whose mothers seem never to have heard the word discipline. This pair of nightmares snatch toys, kick over sandcastles, hit, pinch, rip up paintings and generally make it unsafe to leave your kid's side.

Previously we mums could pretty much sit and have a coffee and a chat (apart from the normal sandpit dispute or two), but now it's not safe to be out of sight of your kids.

The mums in question have been asked to watch their children, but they seem to have the attitude that the other kids will just have to deal with their children's behaviour. One of them actually said that they didn't see a problem with their little darling, she is just high-spirited, and if our kids can't cope, that is their problem not hers. :eek:

I'd love to have a few quiet words with these mini-menaces but when their own parents stand by watching indulgently, what can you do?

Anyone have any tips that have worked for them?

[xkwzit]

Hi Willsmum
Well maybe that's a bit out there...but as an alternative

At daycare and sunday schools I've certainly seen carers use "house rules" to set limits on behaviour. Simple things like
Don't hit/yell at your friends
No running inside
Be gentle with toys (or drawings or people)

There's usually only about 5 things to keep it really simple for the kids (and the carers). Not sure of your venue - but is this an option? I don't think that kids are ever to young to be taught how to share / play together / respect other people's belongings / be polite to others. If you don't start now, when will there ever be a better time? (Oh and there's definately a difference between being spirited and disrespectful - you and your kids don't need to tolerate it).

Otherwise just have a quiet word with all the other nonterrorist mummies and select a new venue/time...

Best of Luck

[mumof2girls]

I had to deal with a similar situation when my daughter was younger, a few of us parents had some new comers who wouldn't discipline their children. After asking them politely to control their children which fell on deaf ears, we did it our selves.
If the child snatched away a toy or hurt one of the children we would tell them no and explain why and give them somethiing else to play with etc. The mothers didn't like us doing this and we gave them the choices of controlling their children's behaviour or we would continue to do it for them. After 2 weeks they never returned and everyone was a lot happier.

This may not be for everyone but it did work for us and hopefully it taught the child a thing or two as I don't think the mother was much help in this area, they did what they wanted and got what they wanted.

Good Luck!

[willsmum]

Thanks guys. I think we'll have to take matters into our own hands. I'd love to have the new venue option, but playgroupis at the kindy that we will be attending, and given that we've been going for 2 1/2 years and these newbies for 2 weeks, I'm stuffed if we're moving!!