Is romance alive and kicking?

[sydneybubhub]

Is the honeymoon over or are you and your partner still swooning in the afterglow of loooove, despite children, work and personal distractions?

When it comes to romance, how does your love life fare?

What’s the most romantic thing you’ve ever done for your beloved or someone has done for you?

With Valentine's Day around the corner, we'd love (pardon the pun) to know that Cupid is still on his game.

[Lastcenturymum]

Well I dunno about Cupid, but I know after more than 20 years married our love is stronger, deeper and better.

We've always made the effort to keep the romance there, even when the kids were little it was candle lit dinners (I cooked them in those days:laughing:) once the kids were in bed and a weekend away once a year sans kids.

Hmm most romantic thing...have to think on that...but I know I have scored lots of jewellery in the last 12 months including having a very special piece made just for me. I've bought sexy lingere (for him, well no, for me!!) notes in his sandwiches, cheeky sms/emails, webcam chats...and very practical and unexpected stuff

and believe me, once the kids get older...IT does get better :D if you have maintained your relationship and kept the communication going. I'm valued, loved and respected. He's the most important thing in my life and my best friend.

[Nan]

Romance is out the window for us at the moment. With a 10 week old, I think its just the timing as we're not too bad in that department usually.

Pre-kids, I was pretty good, but I've been so slack over the last few years.....but then again so has DH! :o

Having said that, DH is very thoughtful in more practical area these days. That shows me that he cares.

When we have a bit more time up our sleeves (eg. when I'm not BF every 3 hours :rolleyes:), we'll go on dates again.

[mum1986]

romance puh-lease. the closest thing i get to romance is after nagging for 9 months he finally noticed my car was 2 small for the car seat and bought me a new one. in the last few yrs i have recieved as presents, jumper leads for my car, a fire extinguisher, an industrial roll of washing cloths and he let me buy my 21st present without any input from him.
very romantic:laughing::laughing::laughing:

[our little treasures]

My hubby is very romantic and often gets flowers just because he wants too,... no special occasion. I love it all of course. We spend quality time together as in on the couch massaging each others feet, sitting outside at night watching the sky or just playing on the computer together. It's very hard now because we have our 3 gorgeous children and we don't like to leave them with anyone. However I think we will always be close because neither of us gets worried when we don't go out. :valentine:

[0BleSseD0]

I am another 'puh-lease!'

Romance? Whats that??

Maybe I should look it up in the dictionary.. it and I arent well aquainted.

[sshellzp]

Romance comes in all shapes and sizes. I dont think "romance" needs to be all about candle lit dinners, flower and chocolates. Me and my DF make our own romance. Even with a child.
We have been together nearly 3 years now and love each other more than ever.

[amychloe]

i have the an awesome man. if im tired from dd being sick or working he will cook and clean for me. We have an outdoor swing seat that we call our love swing and we sit on it together nearly everynight and cuddle and talk. he loves cuddles and we have a wicked sex life and i fall in love with him more everyday after 7 years.
he is an awesome daddy and my best friend and he will tell me everyday he loves me and im beautiful (im a size 20 and still beautiful in his eyes naww)
so romance is alive and still kicking in my household!!!:D

[SassyMummy]

There's no romance here...

Any sort of "romantic" night out involves me planning it, nagging DP to make sure he has that night off, organising Mum to watch DD, getting DD completely ready for the night, spending a while getting ready... all while DP showers, puts on some clothes, and off we go.

Then he whinges at me because we miss a turn-off or something... and while I try to make conversation, he just kinda whinges about his meal.

Even with birthdays and such, where he could be sweet and organise something for me... it's me organising it all, and him going, "Well you didn't say what you wanted, so I got you a voucher." (That one made me quite angry and he hasn't bought me such an impersonal gift again!).

[Milliner]

Romance, what's that?? DP doesn't have a romantic bone in his body.

[SassyMummy]

Romance comes in all shapes and sizes. I dont think "romance" needs to be all about candle lit dinners, flower and chocolates.

While I never get up to anything romantic, I do agree. If my partner wanted to take me for a candlelit dinner or a stroll along the beach at sunset, I wouldn't be eating my meal thinking how romantic it is... I'd be sitting there wondering what hte hell is on my plate because I can't see my food, and on the beach, I'd be thinking about how I'm gonna drag sand all through the house when I get home, and how I hate sand, and hoping no sand blows in my eye...etc etc. lol.

You know, I'd much prefer he take me somewhere special TO ME, not to some generic place that someone has given the "romantic" label too...

We once went to Timezone for our Anniversary... got one of those $50 cards... it was so much fun... much better than having dinner somewhere!

[noniwaldron]

our little man is 5 weeks tomorrow and i'm feeling sexier than ever... i think it's the whole 'i've lost nearly another kilo today!' thing after being fat and preggie for so long! i'm itching to get back into the physical romance but DH won't come near me yet :(

we have lots of cuddles though and we both still make an effort to be considerate ie: he'll let me know if he's going to be late home from work so i don't make dinner too early etc.

it's great just being able to lay down and hug without a giant tummy in the way! i don't have sprinkler boobies either so although they're still a bit tender it's not uncomfortable to spoon in bed :)

[Jaileth]

romance? Hmmm... every now and then, especially when I've had a.. :hair: day, he brings me flowers, I have to ask for chocs and he eats most of them anyway. :laughing: We had dinner out... over a year ago.

It's there... somewhere... but I have a feeling with no2 on the way, it'll disappear again for a year or so... *sigh*

[Shanaynay]

Alive? - Nope.

Kicking? - Yeah, when he snores.

[Queen]

I say yes it is alive, but damn does it take more thought than before DD.
We make the effort to spend time together just us, DP brings me flowers in odd occasions and we do try all the time to keep the flame going, I guess that is it, we work at it all the time as a pose to it just happening.
We just say without 'us' we wouldn't have our family, so we need 'us' to be happy for our family to be happy.

[shed]

My DP isn't very romantic. Last valentines day I told him that I wasn't going to nag him about valentines day this year I was just going to trust him to do something without me going on about it and telling him what to do for it beforehand. I said that if he used his initiative and did something then I would trust him from then on and not coach him in the lead up. Coz I told him to buy me flowers, which he did, and then I told him that I wished I didn't have to tell him to do that and he said that he would have done it without me telling him to.

So far I haven't said a word, not one word, about Valentines Day. Not a peep.

So we'll see what happens shall we?

[MilkOnTap]

So far I haven't said a word, not one word, about Valentines Day. Not a peep.

So we'll see what happens shall we?

LMAO

I have done the opposite. I'm always disappointed by hubby on anniversaries, valentines, birthdays - everything. So this Valentines I got an empty bottle of my favourite perfume, attached a sticky note saying "Versace Woman - Valentines is Feb 14 - 22 days to go!"

If thats not subtle I dont know what is!

Also yesterday something came up in conversation about preparing for things in advance and I told him that I already have his Valentines gift AND his birthday gift (his birthday is next month) so I guess we'll see what happens...

I'm still considering ordering my own flowers - just in case.

If he forgets then the 'mystery flowers' must be from an admirer! :laughing:

[Mum&bubs]

Yes, I think there's still romance in our relationship. Even though we have 2 kids we do what we can to spoil ourselves every now and then when we can. DF also does alot for me, he will come in when I'm tired or sore and give me a full body massage without me having to ask :valentine:

We go out for dinner when we can, this valentines day all we are doing is dinner- no presents this year but no kids on the night. Can't wait :D

[bAaM]

My DP is the most unromantic man u will ever meet.

[Hokey Pokey]

We could try harder... :bee:

[shed]

Update: DP did bring me flowers home, so he is off the hook.

For now :p

[kymmy]

We are not romantics in the typical sense. But we are very much in love and spend as much time as we can together. It is much harder when you have a young baby though.

[ThomasMum]

Sure is :yes: we are still in love, and the sparks are still alive, just like when we were dating :) I still receive flowers every Valentine's Day etc etc :D

My advice is don't make a big deal out of it if you couldnt do it often now that you have kid/s :yes:

[mysunshine]

My DH has a completely different idea to romance than me.....when we first started dating he was very romantic and I would get heaps of cuddles and kisses, but now I have to beg for a hug. I know this is pretty normal, but I wish it wasn't.

I love hugs, kisses, sweet text messages and emails - but that's all a thing of the past now :thumbsdown:

Barb

[mummoss]

we hit a bump patch for a while but we have learned to make some time for each other and things are very :cloud9: now he is so sweet calls everyday to say hi and see how my day is going even though I see him at the end of the day when he gets home and he always gives me cuddles and tells me he loves me :bee:

[jag5000]

not a lot of 'typical' romance going on here... but that said we do little things like just saying nice things, DH will make me coffee in the morning, I'll email him during the day to say something sweet... stuff like that

so actually... maybe there is more romance than I think!

it's a mutual thing tho.. we are both happy with this, neither feels 'deprived'

[Niki01]

DS is almost 6 monhs now so DH and I have started going on dates again. We always promised that we would make time for each once we start having kids. :valentine:

[lil miss]

When we first started dating 2.5 years ago, dp used to surprise me all the time with little gifts (like sending a single red rose to my work with a sweet message in the card), most of it jewllery. As time went on, we did more and more things together, like go to the lagoon (Airlie Beach) every afternoon at sunset and just talk about the day and the future. We always made time for each other.

Now, 2.5 years on plus a 7 month old daughter, he is still suprising me with gifts and making sure I am happy. He is in the process of planning a weekend away (although I'm not allowed to know the details till it happens), and has organised a babysitter for our girl.

We tell each other several time every day that we love each other, and after our daughter has gone to bed, we snuggle up on the couch and watch tv and chat about everything from how we feel to the most random things. During the day, we send each other heaps of little texts saying how much the other person means to us and how much we love them. It sounds soppy, but its reasurring to know that know matter what is going on during the day, we can still make time for each other.

Even though it has been 2.5 years and we are both so tired due to work and raising a baby, we still take time out to enjoy each other and make the most of being together. I honstly cannot imagine being with anyone else EVER!!

He means the world to me, and everyday I find somehting new about him (whether it be something he says or a look he gives) that makes me fall more in love with him. I still have the butterflies in my stomach, and they have only multiplied as time goes on. Ireally have found "the one"! :bee: :cloud9::hugs:

[forbetoel]

My DH knows better than to bring me home flowers on Valentines day.
To me there is nothing romantic about sending flowers on Valentines day.
It is romantinc to me on any other day of the year.

My husband is not overly romantic anyway, and that is the way I like it. One of my best friends was always getting flowers from her DH, and turns out he had a bit on the side during his interstate visits for over 3 years. So romance is not always romance. :detective:

My husband comes home from work every night, and baths the kids, puts them in their P.J's, helps me tidy up, we have dinner, and he reads to them all before tucking them in and bringing me a coffee............now that is romance.

Anyone can send a big bunch of roses, it is the actions everyday that shows how much you are loved.

[sarahsofia2008]

:shakehands:
romance puh-lease. the closest thing i get to romance is after nagging for 9 months he finally noticed my car was 2 small for the car seat and bought me a new one. in the last few yrs i have recieved as presents, jumper leads for my car, a fire extinguisher, an industrial roll of washing cloths and he let me buy my 21st present without any input from him.
very romantic



If your husband bought U a car, i'd consider urself QUITE lucky...

That is now weekly repayments he has 2 make sure are being paid on time etc.
Not 2 forget registration & on road on going costs... So excuse the guy if he doesnt bring U long stemed roses every 2nd day...

U r quite lucky indeed.

My husband and I are comfortbale, he has 2 jobs & I work full time hours, but I would not expect him 2 pay for my car!

I did have a two door hatch back car, the boot wouldnt open due 2 the baby chair strap, but there was no way I WOULD make my husband buy me a car, or nag him til he caved.
It is responsible parenting 2 have a safe car, yes.. But Earn one on your own merit.
Women want equal rights & equal say, pay your way.

We (women) shouldnt expect things like "he must be me a family car", if he insists, then sure!

All i am saying is i wouldnt complain coz he 'only bought u a car, or only allowed u 2 choose your birthday gift'..

Maybe I am just jealous of wifes/gf/ that take no guilt of spending their husbands/bf's cash coz they 'look after the baby'...
Doesnt sit in my book:shame:

[emily1]

Romance?????
I don't know anything about Romance.
Any one Know?

[Leisa21]

Romance is still alive with us. Its hard to find the time for total romance but every night we have candlelit dinners. Most days I try to dress nicely when he comes home from work. But its not all about that.

The most romantic my DH has been is when I was pregnant. He was studying and working one full time job plus a part time job. I was sick as a dog for the first 3 months. I was living with my parents and every morning he would be there at 6am dressed and ready for work and hold back my hair, rub my back and help me through it tHen he would take me to work (I had a car but was too sick to drive) stopping every 5 mins to be sick. Then go to his job, go into town then back to the office then pick me up and take me home and sit with me until 10pm at night when I finally stopped vommiting and went to sleep. We got married when I was 4 months pregnant. My parents werent sure when we first told them I was pregnant, but after seeing what he did for that time they knew how amzing he was and how well he looked after me. And still does.

It might be hard to find time for physical romance but we try to at least once a week. But its they way we treat eachother that gives us romance.

[mumtoza]

romance puh-lease. the closest thing i get to romance is after nagging for 9 months he finally noticed my car was 2 small for the car seat and bought me a new one. in the last few yrs i have recieved as presents, jumper leads for my car, a fire extinguisher, an industrial roll of washing cloths and he let me buy my 21st present without any input from him.
very romantic:laughing::laughing::laughing:
thats about the same as me hun so i know ehere your comin from...:yes::iagree:

[DaniiLawson]

I believe its all about making an effort, having lots in common and strong communication and the rest just happens. I know, my first marriage had none of the above and we went separate ways within 3 years.

D :+) :yes:

[bumMum]

I don't think me or dp have ever been traditionally romantic. I can't remember candle lit dinners or anything. He proposed to me last Christmas in his very own sweet and beautiful way. He is loving and kind on a daily basis and every day tries to do things to make my life happier. We have fantastic sex when we get the time too lol. Usually every Christmas we get a hotel for two nights and have so much fun. I am not sure we can afford it this Christmas damn it!

[trishalishous]

we try, when I'm not exhausted!!!
I still have health problems and have started casual work again so I'm tired a lot of the time!

[Monica1504]

I believe its all about making an effort, having lots in common and strong communication and the rest just happens. I know, my first marriage had none of the above and we went separate ways within 3 years.

D :+) :yes:

I agree! Except my first marriage only made it to 2 years! No communication and not feeling like i was part of a team, we were more like room-mates.
Romance isn't just about flowers and dinners, it's about quality time together and being open and honest with each other. I learnt alot about romance-or lack of- from my first marriage. I will not allow that to happen again! It really can break a relationship.

[Bekk]

I have been with DH since i was 15. He is AMAZING. my absolute best friend. We got married nearly 3 years ago on our 6 year aniversary. I knew from our first date that i would marry him and he tells me every day how much he loves me and that he would marry me again in a heart beat. We are very lucky to have each other. We were always SO honest from the start, never any secrets or hidden feelings and we do anything we can for each other. We still have so much fun together and laugh all the time!! We would live in each others pockets if we could and hate it when we have to be appart.

He is going to be such a great father and i know that as long as we make time for each other and keep each other happy we will keep our family happy.

[Jesska]

I am another 'puh-lease!'

Romance? Whats that??

Maybe I should look it up in the dictionary.. it and I arent well aquainted.

[One of THOSE mums!]

I think romance changes with ur life stage. Once upon a time it was flowers, romantic dinners in amazing restaurants, cruises on the river. But now it is nice to just lay in bed with hot choccie and chat about life, our family and dreams.
Romance has to change otherwise it disappears.

[bundmum]

I am another 'puh-lease!'

Romance? Whats that??

Maybe I should look it up in the dictionary.. it and I arent well aquainted.

:iagree:

[Tenyrmiracle]

Also lacking in the romance department here. We're flat out getting a few minutes together to even talk these days. I still have hope that one day it may return :laughing:

[Blonde Assassin]

My husband & I are a perfect match because we're both complete & total hopeless romantics! We are very close & we're the couple most people probably cringe at & say, "jeez why don't these two get a room?!" but its just the way we are. We're very open & affectionate towards each other. We know other couples who are the complete opposite, which seems weird to us, but if it works for them then that's cool.

We've only been married two months, but for both of the months on our wedding date he's given me presents! Flowers for the first month & a Thai massage voucher for the second month!! He is also an extremely generous man so I get VERY spoilt!!

Love him more every day, he's my soul mate, so happy I found my husband :valentine:

[korfire]

I think we are stronger and more connected after many yrs of marriage and a tribe of children.

My husband is my closest friend. The romance and love is far more intense and there is not a a day that goes by that he doesn't do something wonderful for me. It's often something simple but very thoughtful.

I understand that it isn't that way for some people but it does annoy me when people think it all turns to **** after you get married and have kids. It's like that for some, but not for all.

For us...well we are very happy.

[lemongrass]

No. Romance is a bit dead at the moment. We have a baby and a toddler and after 9 years togethertwe both feel bleh.lol..besides we both are not romantic types..we re boring...lol...the last candle light dinner was 6 years ago prior kids..thats about it.. most of the time I:iron2::bookworm: and he's busy with kids.

[DaughteroftheForest]

OH is a bit hopeless, he tries though. But we do make an effort to have some time with just each other to debrief, de stress and connect. It's usually a bath or a shower together when the kids are asleep.

[Paul64]

Romance and intimacy has deserted us entirely. After our absolutely traumatic birth with cutting and tearing and massive blood loss, we've both lost any desire for intimacy. I think wifey is frightened about re-damaging things "down there" and I'm seeing her now differently after the birth of our girl from before the birth. Please don't judge me because I don't know why I'm feeling like that. I know I just do. Neither of us talk about resuming a sex life so I guess we both have similar feeling about that. I doubt if we ever will. That’s life.

Paul
SA