Advice for 1st time mums

[crafty_gnome]

Thought I would start a thread as this will be by first baby and there just seems to be soooooo much information out there and products and ads saying you have to have this or that. What advice do you have about becoming a mum? What things did you buy that you wouldn't have been able to live without during your pregnancy and first couple of weeks/months? What did you buy that you never used? Any tips of how to be prepared for the labour? Basically anything you can think of, please share!

[cassvanm]

I'm no expert, but these are some suggestions:


don't buy toilettries for bub, just use QV oil. This is coz bub's skin may be too sensitive, and anything with fragrance/perfume can cause a reaction
Line your car seat with garbage bag and beach towels as you get further along- just in case the unthinkable happens, and your waters break in the car
Put half your facewashers in the kitchen/lounge/living area, you will need them there too, and it's great to have them handy
Don't get tie-up bibs, too fiddly
reusable breast pads are great - especially the curved ones!
A boomerang pillow can be fantastic when breast feeding.
Lansinoh is a great product to prepare your nipples with
Always put bub in the car from the passenger side - teaches them not to run to the other side of the car, and into traffic
put hat on bub from birth, regardless of weather - gotta prepare for the sun hat at a later time
When in hospital - SLEEP! When you get home - SLEEP! When bub goes to sleep - SLEEP!That should do to start, Ill see if I can think of anything else.
Cheers
Cass

[kymmy]

SLEEP now! Though you can't bank it, you may look back on it and remember what its like!
I don't get so much of that luxury now as I have older kids. But being pregnant for the first time I am glad I slept a lot. I miss that!

Trust your instincts.
You can listen to people's advice but at the end of the day you have to do what works for you, your baby, and your family.

[mixy]

:iagree: with kymmy on that Trust your instincts

but here are a few things

a change table is the best thing ever invented:) always change then on it and they will always know whats going on (imo)
No matter what pram you get it will not still be practical as they get older, you will need at least one more.
dont listen to people just becasue they have had kids before, because this is your baby not theirs, if something dosent seem right find out
Research, reaseach, research, so that you are informed:)
And above all enjoy yourself, having babies is suposted to be a joyous time:)I hope some of that is of some help:)
Good thread BTW

[Angike]

Try to sleep as much as you can when the baby arrives - whenever it sleeps, you sleep. Don't assume it will sleep at night - I made that mistake!!

Don't organise too many things / visits for when the baby is little. You need a lot of alone time to get to know your baby and breastfeed which can be a bit overwhelming in a room full of people.

Don't buy a million and one 00000 clothes, especially if you are having a baby in warmer weather. My bub was born in April 06 and he wore maybe 2 jumpsuits and spent the rest of the time in a singlet and nappy wrapped up snuggly. When they get a bit older is when you need the clothes for spew and poo blowouts.

I agree with all that the others have said so far - especially about the research and not letting people tell you how to raise your baby. Just because someone had a baby in the past, doesn't mean that they know what your particular baby needs.

[Sissy]

All babies are different. My DD wouldn't use : bassinette, jolly jumper, baby carrier or baby walker. My DS LOVED all of the above!

With DS, we brought a baby swing (you know, the battery operated type) which was priceless when I needed to care for DD.

Hire a baby capsule for the first 6 months. Very handy when bubby falls asleep in the car, and you need to get out.

[Jessiebean]

Ooh hello everyone, I am due #2 in September and I will do some things different this time round:
* some semblance of routine right from the start, especially feeding AFTER sleeping, darling Bubby sone would wake about 10 mins after if I let him sleep after a feed.
* others have said it but use reusable breast pads from the start, the others are expensive, you run out at inconvenient times and many other drawbacks.
*not letting bubby sleep in our bed, too disturbing for eveyone.
*getting bubs aquainted with EBM in a bottle so hubby can feed more, he has only recently discovered how nice it is to cradle our son whilst he has his bottle no that he is weaned.
I am sure there will be more I will add later.
Best wishes to all first time mums to be, your life will change for ever and be so rich and rewarding!

[crafty_gnome]

Thanks girls for all the advice.

For another question, I have my first OB visit next week. What type of things should I be asking??? What can I expect to happen??

[Jel]

We did things ALOT differently for my girls!! You definately learn from having the first bub!

The first bub, I would race into her room at the slightest of noises and settling her to sleep... leading to a girl who kept doing so until she was 2 1/2 or so. Couldn't get back to sleep if she woke up without me going in there...
Second bub, we did the 'controlled crying' techniques - which I think are miracle! I have not had to get up to her at all (except when she was needing feeds overnight as a newborn etc).
I hope the next one is as easy going as my second. The first is still 'a little princess'!

[hubber in hiding]

Well........... I would suggest cramming as much information into your head about normal birth as you can.

Caesarean rates are on the rise and I feel a massive reason is that they are quite convenient for OB in both the private and public system, so women are often pushed into having them for unneccessary reasons :(

So to avoid this you should arm yourself with all the info you can - Buhbub is a great place to source info on how to avoid an unneccessary caesear.

There are many interventions that most women do not perceive as risky (just through lack of information) that are standard practice in many hosptials.

Sorry to sound a little preachy - but when I was pg with my first, I was looking forward just to a normal birth.... well I ended up being coerced into a very much unwanted and traumatic caesear during labour that has haunted me for 4 years.

And it wasn't just that birth.... it severely impacted on my second pregnancy and birth, and now even though my last birth was not traumatic, I am already extremely nervous about this birth.

I just wouldn't want any other woman to feel like that, so please just inform yourself of normal birth, risks of induction, reliability of scans, the inaccuracy of 'due dates' and the like throughout your pregnancy so you have the best possible chance of escaping unscathed :o

Peace out :flowerz:

*steps off soapbox*

[GeorgiaAnne]

Ummm,
- Trust your own instincts
- but don't be afraid to ask for help
- re: breastpads, I found the re-usable ones no good as I had a LOT of milk and would flood them every 15 - 30 mins :o
- enjoy your time alone with your dh / dp, you will miss it! (even though family life is rewarding)
- don't buy a w@nky pram just to look good WASTE OF MONEY, the smaller and easier to fold the better.
- don't listen to everyones advice
- minimise visitors in the first coupla weeks
- enjoy your pregnancy, your first pg is such a special time of your life, treasure it!

[mummyofchaise]

First time round is hard you will do and buy things you don't need but you will learn for the second i think everyone does that.
My tips
When you get to your due date, don't stress about baby coming because it WILL come when it's ready and it's ONLY another couple of weeks. Try and relax and sleep as much as possible. Try not to be induced, ended in my labour lasting 31 hours.
I had heaps and heaps of singlets and hardly used any as i much prefered the short sleeve suits with the press buttons. Singlets ride up under suits and cant be comfortable and also the suits hold the nappy up and i've found is less likely to leak.
Goodluck