View Full Version : Dropping a breastfeed
Hi girls..i need help!!
My son is now just over one and still breastfeeds as much as he did before he started solids!! He wakes twice during the night for breastfeeds so i have decided to start weaning him starting with the night feeds. We tried last night for the first time but no luck at all. At his first wake up at about 11pm (he goes to bed about 7) I tried first then my husband tried. We offered water and tried to pat him back to sleep but in the end it was a screaming match for about 20 or 30 mins until we finally gave in and i gave him a breastfeed.He had it and went straight to sleep. So what do we do? Be firmer and go for longer or is there something better to try? Im just not sure where to go from here.
We have started lying him down in his cot and patting him to sleep or nearly asleep and walking out and this was working fine (instead of feeding to sleep), but he still wakes up and needs (or wants) a breastfeed to put him off to sleep again.
I was hoping to drop his night feeds and then slowly progress to one of his day feeds, but cant even get this first hurdle. We have started to offer him milk in a sippy cup during the day to get him used to the taste. He tries it but doesnt have very much before refusing it.
Keep trying... don't give up... he will come around... just slowly one step at a time... maybe start cutting down on the day feeds first... guess he will cut down slowly himself give him time... or maybe NOT !!! After all he is a booby boy....
Sorry I couldn't be make more of a help....:hugs:
Thanx for replying beautiful Ness!!! My first and only reply...woo hoo. Dont worry, ill keep at it. xx
Here is that web address that might help with some of the problem.... Sheyne will reply to all her emails.... hope this helps....
Plus maybe some bubhub mums might reply soon.....:fingerscrossed:
I'm going through a similar thing with my DD.. she was waking 4-5 times a night, and had to be breastfed back to sleep everytime... there was no other way around it. I knew she wasn't hungry, she just needed the fed to get her off to sleep.
We had a sleep expert come in to see us for 3 nights, (she is absolutley wonderful, the real baby whisperer!) and fixed everything! She uses a similar technique to what you were doing. Going in when he wakes, patting him or stroking his back, not picking him up, not turning on lights, then walking away. If the crying persists, go in again after about 5 mintues and try the same thing again...Doing this until he falls asleep.
After a few nights, when he wakes, he should be able to put himself back to sleep without needing you and without being breastfed.
It took one night of doing this with my DD and she hasn't woken up once during the night since. And if she does, she just has a little cry and then puts herself back to sleep.
I think you do have to be strong and perservre with it, but the results are fantastic!
Good luck, hope it helps! :)
Thanks again Nessa..that website is great, lots of ideas!!
Katie..thank you! I only just saw your message tonight, but i will try what you suggest starting tomorrow night and maybe by the end of the week i might get my first full nights sleep in well over a year!! Yay!! The pics of you and your family are gorgeous by the way..your little girl is just adorable!!
Hi I was having the same problem with my ds who is now almost 15 mths.
Just after his first birthday I started introducing him to cows milk in a straw cup but I watered it down half half and warmed it up so he didn't feel quite so ripped off:laughing:. He has been using a straw cup for water since around 10mths so it was just a case of changing what was in the cup.
Unfortunately I am still stuck on one feed but I keep perservering as I am almost positive that he is just using me for a dummy now:p
Oh he is now on full cream milk without being watered down and loves it.
Apparently it takes a little time for their tummys to adjust to cows milk from breast milk. Can't remember where I got that info from but it makes sense to me.
I also have gotten into the habit of not picking him up as soon as he wakes up in the middle of the night. Instead I just lay him back down and tell him its sleep time and rub his back until he calms down enough that I can walk out of the room.
It has been exceptionally hard because he shares a room with his 4yr old sister who is jack of being woken up but it is paying off and now we are down to the one wake up in the night and its not every night.
There is a light at the end of tunnel:sunshine:
Thanks Kirsten. Well, he woke up at 11 and i thought id give some of these ideas a go. I tried lying him down on his tummy (he seems to settle and not cry as much in this position). I patted him until he settled a bit but just when i think hes on his way back to sleep he really starts up again...very loudly!! I persisted though and it took 1 1/2 hours but hes finally back asleep. I kept leaving the room when he was calm but as soon as he realised i was gone the grizzling turned into full on screaming. Id go back in pat him for a bit or rub his back and say "shhh, time for sleep" over and over (not sure if talking might be a bad thing??) It took ages but im so ready to really do this now. I badly need a good nights sleep!! Anyway, better go and get some sleep before round two!!! Thanks everyone for your suggestions and advice.
Glad you have found some great advise... and that you are finally putting it to some good use... lets hope Fraser is willing to try it.... dont let him win... keep at it girl... remember your the mother... the boss... you need your sleep too....:thumbsup:
Hey u, yep..i was persistant and it worked..yay!! He just woke up during his day sleep too and cried for only about 20 seconds then put himself back to sleep...im so excited!!! Thanks for your support mate!!
Hi Jodestar21 just saw your thread. This article is for cosleeping babies, but even if you dont cosleep there are some really good step by step advice on weaning 1 year olds at night.
That website had some really great ideas..thank you! Well its up to the 4th night now and its going so well. Thanks everybody, I think i took a little bit from everyones ideas and put it all together to suit Fras and it has been very successful. Last night he slept 6 1/2 hours straight..the longest hes ever done. I was amazed!! When he woke up at 2am all i had to do was offer him some water (which he refused), then touch his shoulder and say lay down Fras, time for sleep and he laid down straight away made a little sleepy noise and went straight back to sleep. He seemed to accept the changes very easily (after a very hard first night!!) So thank you everyone who replied. This was the thing I dreaded most and had least confidence in but now i feel like ive won the lottery. Cheers all x
Thats excellent, glad to hear its all working well.
Just wanted to thank everyone again for all your advise and support and hope this thread might also help others who are in the same situation i was in...there is a light at the end of the tunnel!!!
Its been a week now and last night Fraser had his first 8 1/2 hour sleep ever...yay!! I cant believe how well everything is going and just keeps getting better. Honestly, if theres others out there that are about to begin this process..hang in there. It is hard at first and there will be tears, (but not the horrible heart wrenching ones..well there wasnt from Fraser and im hoping not for you either). It is so so worth it. I feel like a new person after all this sleep and have so much more energy to play with Fras during the day now.
Honestly, if you have a plan (take the bits that will work for you and your bubs from all the tips you get), then be very strong and determined in putting it into action..you will succeed!!! Thanks again everyone..bub hub chicks rock!!
Glad you are having success in getting your nights back. :yelclap:
My DS sounds very similar to yours a couple of weeks back so I should really be trying a similar approach. I know in theory what I need to do but in the middle of the night all my foggy brain wants is the quick fix that lets me go back to bed asap. So I just give in and feed and tell myself I'll start being tough the next night. :D
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